The Complete Oregon Series, page 100
“You look beautiful too,” Rika finally said.
Amy shuffled her feet. “Oh. Thank you.”
Silence spread between them.
“Hendrika?” Tess called from upstairs. “Is it a new guest?”
“It’s Amy,” Rika called back.
“Why don’t you take her to the parlor?”
“Oh. Of course. I’m sorry. I must have forgotten my manners. It’s just...” Rika tugged on her dress again and then gestured from Amy to herself. “This is all so...”
Amy blanched. She hadn’t changed her mind, had she?
“It’s just all so new,” Rika said. “I barely know how to behave around you.”
Amy nodded, glad that Rika had the courage to say what she was only thinking. At least they were both feeling the same.
Tess came down the stairs. “Hello, Amy. Why don’t you use our parlor for a visit?”
Amy untied her hat with its red, white, and blue ribbon streamers, just so she would have something to do with her hands. Should she have brought flowers or a little present as a sign of her affection? She wished there were a protocol for courting another woman. “Uh, actually, I wanted to see if you could spare Rika for an hour or two. I would love to show her the celebration.”
Rika’s eyes lit up. She sent Tess a hopeful glance.
Tess smiled. “Of course. You two run along and enjoy yourselves.”
“Are you sure?” Rika looked back and forth between them. “We have a lot of guests coming in later and—”
“Go. Frankie and I will manage on our own.” Tess pushed her toward the door.
Rika stumbled a bit, and Amy caught her. Holding on to both of Rika’s arms, she looked into her eyes from just inches away.
Rika stared back before she cleared her throat and pulled away. “I have to get my shawl.” She pointed over her shoulder.
Grinning, Tess watched as Amy waited in the doorway and shuffled her feet.
Then, finally, they were out on the street, where Amy could breathe more freely. She kept one eye on the busy street and one eye on Rika while they wandered toward the wooden platform that had been erected in front of the saloon. The president of the bank was delivering a passionate speech. They stopped for a moment to listen as he read the Declaration of Independence before they continued down the street.
Next to them, young couples strolled arm in arm.
Amy bit her lip. She didn’t dare take Rika’s arm like that.
Surrounded by the noise of gun salutes, firecrackers, and a brass band playing, they made their way down the street. Children shouted as they hopped toward the finish line in a sack race.
“I did that too when I was a little girl,” Amy said.
Rika smiled as if imagining her at that age. “I bet you won.”
Amy felt her cheeks heat. “I did.”
Chuckling, Rika linked her arm through Amy’s as they continued to weave around the other spectators.
A tingle ran through Amy’s arm and down the rest of her body. She strode with measured steps, feeling a bit awkward but at the same time also proud of being the one who got to stroll with Rika on her arm.
Next to the church, picnic tables had been set up beneath a group of oaks.
“Oh.” Amy stopped and looked at the people sitting at the picnic tables. “I should have thought of bringing a picnic.”
Rika squeezed her arm. “It doesn’t matter. Spending time together is—”
“Good day, Ms. Bruggeman,” someone said next to them.
Amy turned.
Gary Snyder stood in front of them, a glass of lemonade in his hands. He nodded at her. “Hello, Amy.”
Under normal circumstances, Amy would have been happy to see Gary and talk horses with him, but now he was wasting her valuable time with Rika. She barely held herself back from asking what he wanted.
Apparently, he didn’t want anything from her. He turned toward Rika. “I’m Gary Snyder. We met at the dance a few months ago, but we haven’t been formally introduced. Can I offer you a glass of lemonade?”
“No, thank you. I’m not thirsty.”
“Oh.” Gary stared down at the glass in his hands. “Well, then. Maybe another time.” He hurried away.
Before Amy could breathe a sigh of relief, Alex Tolridge, the doctor’s son, stepped down from the boardwalk and headed in their direction.
Amy tried to walk around him, wanting to be alone with Rika, but Alex approached them and doffed his hat. “Miss Hamilton, Miss Bruggeman.”
“Aaldenberg,” Rika said. At his startled glance, she added, “Bruggeman is my maiden name. I decided to go back to using my late husband’s name.”
Alex worried his hat between his hands. “Well, then, Miss Aaldenberg. I was wondering if you would do me the honor of accompanying me to the dance tonight.”
Amy’s nostrils flared. She bunched her hands into fists but had to watch as Alex directed a hopeful grin at Rika. A bitter taste coated her tongue, and she wanted to spit. Is this how it’s going to be? Will I have to watch while every bachelor in town tries to court her?
“I appreciate the kind offer, Mister...”
“Tolridge.”
Rika gave a nod. “Mr. Tolridge. As I said, I appreciate the offer, but I’m terribly sorry. I’m sure you realize I came west to marry Mr. Sharpe.”
“But you didn’t,” he said.
“Because I realized that after losing my late husband, a veteran of the war, I couldn’t bear to remarry.” Rika held his gaze, the picture of sincerity.
Because she is sincere. She can’t bear to remarry, but not because she’s still in love with her dead husband. She’s in love with me. At the thought, Amy’s fists uncurled and the tension in her shoulders dissipated. At least I hope she is.
“I understand.” Alex settled the rumpled hat back on his head.
When he gave a small bow and walked away, Rika called after him, “Oh, Mr. Tolridge?”
He turned around.
“Would you please let your bachelor friends know? It would spare them and me a lot of embarrassment if they didn’t approach me with marital intentions.”
“Of course.” Alex hurried away and disappeared in the crowd, saving the remains of his dignity.
Rika looped her arm through Amy’s again.
“You’re incredible,” Amy said. Instead of condemning her to suffer in silence, Rika had solved the problem once and for all.
“No, I’m not.” Rika shook her head. “It’s just that I finally learned not to settle for what I can have, but to strive for what I want.”
Amy held her breath for a moment. She leaned close on the crowded street and whispered, “And that’s me?”
Rika nodded and smiled.
Happiness flowed through Amy like golden sunlight. She felt as if she were floating as they continued their stroll around town.
It wasn’t long before another man crossed their way.
Amy was ready to punch every bachelor who came within a five-yard radius of Rika, but then she realized that it was Phin. With a big lump in her throat, she let go of Rika’s arm.
Phin and Rika stared at each other for a moment, then Phin snatched off his hat and kneaded it between his hands. “Hello, Hendrika.”
“Hello, Phin. How are you doing?”
He stuck his finger under his collar as if it were too tight. “Oh, I’m fine. Today was my last day workin’ for the Hamiltons, but I guess Amy told you that.”
Amy hadn’t. She had been too tongue-tied when she had seen Rika in her new dress.
“And how are you?” Phin asked.
“I’m fine too.”
They stood awkwardly while people veered around them, throwing curious glances their way.
“Um, if you’d excuse me. The game is about to start.” He pointed toward the field where a few of the town’s gentlemen were preparing to play baseball. Before either of them could say another word, he hurried away.
Rika took Amy’s arm again. Her hands were trembling, and she held on more tightly than necessary. “Lord, that was awkward. Well, at least he’s still talking to me.”
Amy sighed. “His pride took quite the beating when you refused to marry him. Guess it’ll take some time.” At least she hoped that was all it would take. She set them off in another direction, away from the baseball field and Phin.
Before they reached the end of the street, they were stopped by two more bachelors who apparently hadn’t met Alex yet and hadn’t been informed not to approach Rika. One of them offered to explain the rules of baseball to her while the other asked if she would watch the fireworks display with him in the evening.
After Rika had said no to both offers, she sighed. “Maybe we should have taken Tess up on her offer to use their parlor for a visit.”
Their gazes met.
“Do you want us to go back?” Amy pointed in the direction of the hotel.
With reddened cheeks, Rika nodded. “As nice as the festivities are, I would rather talk to you than to every bachelor in town.”
Amy set them off toward the hotel as fast as her dress and her Sunday shoes allowed.
Baker Prairie, Oregon
July 5, 1868
Rika’s Sunday-polished boots squeaked over the church floor as she fidgeted. She wanted to slip past Reverend Rhodes and out of the church, hoping to escape before he could ask about her canceled wedding plans.
But the pastor stood in front of the church portal and exchanged pleasantries with Tess and Frankie, and Rika knew she couldn’t leave before it was her turn to say good-bye to him.
“You should come by one morning,” Tess said. “We’re planning on offering breakfast at the hotel too, and my cousin is a wonderful cook.”
When Rika had hired on as a maid in the hotel, she had assumed that Tess would rule the kitchen, while Frankie would take care of their guests’ horses. Instead, she found that Frankie and Tess shared tasks equally.
Tess patted Frankie’s hand and smiled at her, not hiding her affection.
Rika straightened her shoulders too. Frankie and Tess hold their heads up high, even though they had to listen to the reverend going on and on about every sin in the Good Book. They thanked the pastor for his sermon as if he hadn’t just promised them eternal hell. It’s almost as if they know better and are just humoring him.
She watched them say good-bye to the pastor and wander away, arm in arm.
They’re at peace with this. With themselves and each other. She wished the same for herself and Amy.
Finally, it was her turn to say good-bye. She shook the pastor’s hand, mumbled a few pleasantries, and then tried to slip past him.
But the reverend blocked the doorway. “I see Mr. Sharpe missed church today, which is very unfortunate because what I had to say in my sermon seems to fit him pretty well.”
Rika squirmed. “I’m sure he’s very busy preparing to set up his own ranch.”
The reverend’s gaze seemed to drill into her. “I won’t have such behavior in my congregation. Marriage is not to be taken lightly. It’s not something to toy with.”
“Which is why we decided not to get married after all,” Rika said, struggling to hold his gaze. “I assure you Mr. Sharpe was never anything but a gentleman toward me.”
Reverend Rhodes stared at her for a moment longer. He pursed his lips in disapproval but finally stepped aside and allowed her to pass.
Rika hurried down the church steps, closely followed by Amy and the rest of the Hamilton family.
Tess and Frankie joined them. “Come over to the hotel and pick up a basket before you leave,” Tess said. “We prepared too much food for the Fourth of July celebrations, and now we have a lot of leftovers.”
“If you have any apple pie, I won’t say no to that,” Luke said. “You know I always had a bit of a sweet tooth.”
“What about you young folks?” Frankie nodded at Amy, Nattie, and Rika. “Hendrika worked hard this week, and I bet the rest of you did too. Since you didn’t get to have a picnic yesterday, maybe you could go on a picnic today?”
“Oh, could we?” Rika clapped her hands. “I’ve never gone on a picnic.” Back in Boston, Sundays had been spent mending clothes, writing letters, and fighting over the magazines in Mrs. Gillespie’s parlor.
Nattie shook her head. “I promised Phin one last reading lesson before he leaves, so I’d rather go home.”
Rika struggled not to let her excitement show. She glanced at Amy, waiting for her answer. Maybe just the two of them could go. She longed for a moment alone with Amy.
The same longing burned in Amy’s eyes. “Sure,” Amy said. “If you want to have a picnic, we’ll have one. I know the perfect place.”
With the basket of food in one hand, Amy wandered along the river. They passed a few nice spots, but Amy kept going and Rika followed. Soon, the river meandered through the forest.
“You want to have a picnic in the forest?” Rika asked.
“Just wait and see. I promise it’ll be perfect.”
They wandered through the forest, padding over a carpet of pine needles and ducking beneath low-hanging branches.
“There.” Amy pointed.
Rika stopped to take it all in.
The river twisted south, flowing in a wide arch. In that bend of the river, the trees parted, and they stepped onto a meadow dotted with wildflowers. A willow growing along the bank dipped its branches into the water. Colorful ducks bobbed up and down, paddling against the gentle current.
“Oh, Amy. It’s beautiful.” The Hamiltons had taken her to almost every part of their land, but she’d never seen the hidden meadow before.
“Papa brought me and Nattie here after Measles, our first mare, died. It’s a special place.”
Their gazes met and held.
Rika touched Amy’s forearm and let her hand linger. “Thank you for sharing it with me.”
Amy smiled and lifted her hand as if wanting to touch Rika’s cheek but then pulled back and said, “You’re very welcome.” She turned away and spread a blanket over a flat part of the meadow. After sniffing, she wrinkled her nose. “Sorry. It’s a saddle blanket and might be a bit smelly. I should have remembered to bring a clean one.”
“It’s all right. You don’t need to impress me. Just spending time together is enough.”
The worried expression on Amy’s face faded. She plopped onto the blanket and immediately took off the hated sunbonnet and unlaced her Sunday boots. “Come on.” She tugged Rika down next to her. “Let’s get comfortable.”
Rika took off her boots. When Amy rolled down her socks, Rika caught a glimpse of her bare calves. How soft and pale her skin looked, especially against her tan hands. Wetting her dry lips with her tongue, Rika imagined touching that smooth skin.
Amy nudged Rika’s foot with her big toe, then let their feet linger against each other. “Hungry?”
“Starved.” Reluctantly, Rika forced her gaze away from Amy’s legs.
Heavenly smells wafted up when Amy opened the basket. They sampled pieces of ham, cheese, roasted chicken, and fresh bread with apple butter.
“Mmm.” Amy moaned. “Either it’s the fresh air or Frankie is a really good cook.”
Rika hummed her agreement. “Did they pack anything for dessert? We bought fresh fruit for the hotel, and I think there were leftovers of that too.”
“Yeah, I think...” Amy lifted the cloth from the basket. “Oh.”
“What?” Rika leaned forward and put a hand on Amy’s shoulder to peek into the basket.
Next to the last piece of bread, a box of ripe strawberries waited to be eaten.
An image of Frankie hand-feeding berries to Tess flashed through her mind. All of a sudden, she became overly aware of her hand resting on Amy’s shoulder. Heat ricocheted between them.
Amy pulled back her hand from the basket as if the strawberries were poisonous.
Rika let go of Amy’s shoulder and stared at her hands in her lap. The peaceful atmosphere was gone, and she hated the sudden awkwardness that had sprung up. She shook her head at herself. “You know, they’re just strawberries, but we’re both acting as if they are forbidden fruit from the Garden of Eden.”
“W-what?” Amy stared at her with wide green eyes.
Rika sighed. “I watched Frankie and Tess at church earlier. When the pastor talked about unwed folks carrying on with each other and other sins, they didn’t duck their heads in shame. I don’t believe they think of themselves as sinners—at least not for liking each other the way they do. One day, I want to be able to think like that too.”
“I want that too,” Amy said, her voice barely more than a whisper. “I’m trying, really. It’s just hard to get used to the thought that it’s all right to feel like this. And when I see how easy it seems to be for you, I feel guilty about feeling guilty.” Her lips formed a trembling grin that didn’t reach her eyes.
Rika settled cross-legged on the blanket. “Easy?” She shook her head. “It’s not easy for me either, but I’ve seen sin and crime and cruelty in my life, and I know that this,” she touched her chest, then Amy’s, “is not it. I watched one of my half brothers being stillborn because my father was too drunk to fetch the midwife. I’ve seen greedy overseers beat mill girls half to death and children starve because no one cared.”
Amy reached over and gripped Rika’s hand with both of hers.
The gentle touch sent tingles up Rika’s arm, distracting her from thoughts of the past for a moment. “My whole life has been a struggle to survive, and I never thought it could be different, that there could be more to life,” she said. “Now I feel like I’m living, not just existing, for the very first time, and I have a hard time believing that what I feel is a bad thing. Compared to all the cruelty I’ve seen, how can this,” she nodded down at their joined hands, “be a sin?”
