Personal Possessions, page 30
“First off, Sara is being demoted. She doesn’t know it yet, but by the end of the day if you need copies run…buzz her; she’s your gal. Second, she is not privy to anything confidential from this day forward. She has signed a contract on confidentiality but as I found out yesterday, some employees don’t take that contract seriously. Third, I need termination papers drawn up on Sam Fordham but they are to remain in the safe. Have them all typed up…don’t date them, I will do that. Just have everything filled out, also…I want you and Elle to meet in here and I want a full incident report done on what happened with her yesterday so that I can work on getting the permanent write up in his file.”
I know she is dying to know, but she will hear it enough when Elle goes to write the report. Two reports have to be done. First, Elle will have to tell her everything that happened and Mary will write it then Elle will have to write her own copy.
No story can be told the same way twice.
“I also want the same done up on Sara…both even the incident report.”
Mary is flying with her pen getting everything down.
I finish with Mary and check another to do off of my list. Looking down at my watch I see that our first meeting is in just a bit. I looked up when I heard the knock on my office door.
It was Elle.
“Come in.”
She steps in but I could see the hesitation in her walk.
“Shut the door behind you, please.”
I was at my desk, finishing up some of the other paperwork that had been lying there for some time.
“Sir, we don’t have time…the first cl…“
Did she just call me sir? I raised my head slowly to look at her; she won’t meet my eyes. I was stunned and insulted.
“I don’t give a fuck about the client!”
I could see the fear in Elle’s eyes. For the first time I was glad she saw it. She caused it, I had put up with this shit for long enough. Everything that I was doing was for her and me. She was going to deny this…still.
Quickly Elle turned and shut the door. I turned the glass opaque and raised the music on but I doubt that was going to cover up the sound of my voice.
“Sir…”
“Did you just call me sir?” I asked as I walked around my desk to stand in front of her.
Elle looked directly down at her papers but she wouldn’t answer me.
“I just asked you a question, Elle.”
“I think you heard what I called you…Mr. McHale. I don’t feel comfortable calling you anything else.” Elle whispered.
I chuckled ominously. She was fucking kidding, right? Two days ago, I just had her pinned up against the wall finger fucking her until she screamed, but yet she doesn’t feel comfortable calling me anything other than sir. Did I enter the Twilight Zone somewhere?
“You don’t feel comfortable calling me anything else, huh.”
Just as fast as I finished my statement I was over at my desk, throwing everything off of it. None of this was anything to me. I didn’t want any of it, if I didn’t have her beside me. She was getting this, when was it going to sink in that nothing had ever mattered to me other than what was mine; my personal possessions.
“You feel comfortable now?”
I asked. I wanted to make sure that she was right where she needed to be to feel right at home. Everything around her chaotic and a fucking disaster since peace and love wasn’t enough to bring her to me, maybe this would.
I was losing my mind. I couldn’t think straight now. All I thought about was how I was supposed to keep Elle with me. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks or a bullet straight shot…right between the fuckin’ eyes.
I was my mother.
I was pleading for someone who was never going to accept my love for what it truly would be…unconditional. Life had come full circle. I may have promised myself that I would never wind up in that kind of dysfunctional relationship, here I was…running in a hamster wheel that would never stop spinning.
Elle’s voice brought me from my thoughts.
“Ya bout dun, hun.”
Her Georgia accent was thick…it brought me back to when we were in high school. I looked at her and allowed her to catch my eyes. That spark was still as bright as a midnight star.
“Ya bout dun throwin yer fit, TJ.”
“Elle…. I can’t do this again. I can’t have ya turn your back on me again. You won’t let me explain about Natasha and I feel you’re gonna walk away from me for no reason at all….again.”
“TJ, we’ll talk about this, ok baby….later. Honey, we gotta get through these signings so that you can get down to Richland. So, I need you to take a deep breath and let’s go in there and do this, ok?”
I nodded my head and grabbed her face and I barely touched my lips to hers.
“I love you so much, Ellie-bean; I won’t survive this time.”
As her lips touched mine, Elle didn’t pull away, she stayed close to my face for a moment.
“Love you too, babe.”
I felt my heart come back to life with those four words. Maybe I wasn’t going down the same path as my mom. Maybe I didn’t have to plead with someone to love me.
We got through the first signing. Elle and Sara did what they had to do and made sure that all the paperwork ended up in the right boxes. We worked all afternoon, it went smooth and quick, just like I knew it would with Elle directing.
By 6:30 we both were exhausted. Elle set up everything for the next couple of days the same way and we went back to the hotel.
I grabbed a shower as Elle ordered room service. I asked her to make sure to grab me some beers and whatever she wanted to drink; she was going to need something. I could tell Elle was nervous, what she had to be nervous about…I had no idea. I was afraid of what she might say.
“I’m ready to talk.”
I said as I opened up my first beer.
Hesitantly, Elle shook her head.
I grabbed the bottle of beer as Elle grabbed her wine and glass and we went into the living area.
I was done beating around the bush, I was just going to tell her and get it over with…no more secrets.
“I met Natasha two years ago. She was a buyer in my company. She was blonde, blue-eyed; extremely thin and a cutthroat bitch. She was the total opposite of you in every shape and form. She would continually flirt with me or ask me out. At first I ignored her; I’d push her away, but she was persistent. So one night I had to go to a cocktail party so, I asked her to come along, she agreed. We danced and drank with others that we knew, but sometime during the night something happened and we ended up sleeping together. After that, we went out a couple of times, but nothing really became of us; because I wouldn’t allow it…she wasn’t you.”
I took a swig of my beer as I watched Elle pour herself another glass of wine.
“A year went by, we talked and still worked together, but we never went out again. That was until one night, after work… she asked me over to her house, she was having a small get together and wanted me to come; I did. I’m not gonna lie, Elle, I slept with women but my heart wasn’t in it. I know it sounds harsh, but they were just a body on a cold night. I never could make it anything more than that.”
I noticed the glass that Elle had just filled was already gone and she was pouring another glass.
“I went and ended up spending the night with her just like the last time. I got up in the morning and went home. Monday morning she showed up just like normal. Nothing had changed…everything was the same as the last time we had gotten together. Then a couple weeks go by and one night after work. I stayed late… I had a meeting or something in the morning… I can’t remember but for some reason, Tasha stayed late too. Then, just as soon as everyone left the building, she came into my office and told me that she was pregnant.”
Elle turned as white as a ghost. I almost asked if she was ok, but then she took some deep breaths and her color came back to normal…so I continued.
“I didn’t have any children and I felt bad for her, Elle. I didn’t want her raising a baby….my baby, alone without me. I told her to move in with me, to stop working. I wanted my child to be healthy. I explained to her, I wasn’t a believer of marriage but if she wanted for her own honor, she could tell people we were engaged. I swear; I had no intention of ever marrying her Elle. Months went by… doctor’s visits were made, I was never allowed to go to them, she said that she wanted to wait til we could hear the heartbeat before I showed up. Hell, I didn’t know anything about this, I just agreed. She went out and bought herself a ring, and then began to start pressuring me into getting married. We’d fight over it night after night. Then about three months in, I came home early one day and she was downing a bottle of wine. I confronted her on it, told her I was no doctor but common sense tells ya not to drink when you’re pregnant, that’s when she confessed it was all a lie.”
It was so hard to listen to myself tell this story…the more I talked about it the madder I became. Now she was going to be owner of my home and two million dollars richer.
“I told her that she needed to be out by the end of the day, I didn’t care where she went or what she did. I was done. She thought if she faked a pregnancy, I’d marry her and she’d be able to get to my money.”
She got to my money alright.
“I’m so sorry, honey that you had to go through that.”
“Elleny, I’m thirty-five years old…I’m getting up there in age and I don’t have any children. That just got me thinking.”
Suddenly, Elle ran from the living room and into the bathroom. She threw her face into the bowl where the whole bottle of wine came back up.
“Honey, are you ok?”
I asked as I grabbed a washrag and got it wet for her.
“Yeah, I think so, I just think I had a busy day and I’m tired.”
Elle got up from the floor and headed over to the sink to rinse her mouth out and brush her teeth quickly. Turning around she hugged me.
“I’m sorry, TJ…about not letting you explain and for how she treated you.”
“It’s ok, it’s for the best. I just wanted you to know the truth about what happened.”
We decided to call it an early night, so we finished up the kitchen and headed into bed.
The next couple of days flew by. That was because we were so busy. The signings were going well. All the presentations were flawless and the contracts were simple. Elle was doing what she needed to do so that when we moved everything down to Richland, it would be arranged easily. Sara was doing her filing every night. I think that was because she wanted Elle gone, but what she didn’t know was that she was getting ready to be gone.
Today was Wednesday and we were scheduled to leave tomorrow evening on the company plane. Elle decided to go home and video conference her kids, I still had stuff to finish up, but seeing as this was our last night together…alone I decided against it. We walked to the car and I drove us to the hotel. I really wanted tonight to be special. I had planned eight days and I enjoyed every single day of being with Elle. I decided to take a shower as Elle ordered room service for us and video conferenced her kids.
Standing in the hot water of the shower, I got to thinking that I had never seen Elle’s kids. I wondered if they looked like their mother, at least I hoped that they did. I imagined what our children would look like if we ever did have kids together. I started picturing my daughter looking just like Elle and my son looking just like me. It was almost bittersweet.
I finished up my shower and put on some sweats and a t-shirt. I wanted to be comfortable but yet, something with easy access…I never knew how greedy Elle was going to get. I spritzed myself with cologne, grabbed my beer off of the dresser and headed out the bedroom door.
I wanted to be quiet so I didn’t disturb their conversation.
“…Yes, I’m done now so all I have to do is take my paperwork up to the courthouse to hand in and I’m freed from all this.”
“That’s good, there’s my handsome boy…how was your day…did you have practice?”
“Yeah…I did, it was good. Did Harlee tell you about Uncle Kevin?”
I peeked around the pillar that was in back of Elle so that I could see on the screen but yet, they couldn’t see me. The view that I got was like looking into a mirror.
Her son was a spitting image of me.
I was shocked by the image on the screen, I dropped my beer bottle to the floor. How was that possible, how could Elle and Bear’s son look just like me.
“Ahhhh”
I heard Elle’s voice but I couldn’t see anything but the image that was burned into my brain.
“JoJo, I’ll call you back.”
“TJ…I can…“
“Who the fuck was that, Elleny?”
I could hear the panic in my own voice.
“I can explain, Trevor.”
“Who the fuck was that!!!”
I screamed. I screamed so loud my whole body shook. Something wasn’t right here and I was getting to the bottom of this right…fucking…now.
“They’re my kids, Trevor.”
Yeah…no shit, I think we have concluded that information. She was fucking hiding something from me and I was hoping and praying it wasn’t what I thought it was.
“The twins.”
The oldest ones. I wanted to make sure I was correct on who was who. Elle just nodded. She was crying…this was so not a good fucking sign.
“Bear’s set of twins…right?”
I asked as I waited for the head nod. I prayed for the head nod…the head was not nodding.
“I asked you a question….Bear’s the father of your set of twins….right?”
This time I asked slower, thinking maybe she didn’t understand what I was asking her. Still, no head nod.
I wanted answer. I was sick of playing the silent game with her. So, this time when I asked, I went up to her, putting my hands on her shoulders and shook her as I yelled.
“Who’s the father of your son and daughter, Elleny?”
“You are!!! They’re yours, Trevor!!!”
Elle screamed back.
I couldn’t breathe. I had a set of twins that I knew nothing about. I couldn’t even think straight. I had a set of twins I knew nothing about. I had to take a step back. I couldn’t even walk straight. I had a set of twins I knew nothing about.
“How….old?”
I couldn’t take my eyes off of that computer. I saw my son…My son. I didn’t know what to do, fall to the floor and cry like a baby, scream in Elle’s face for hiding something that important or run to the computer and call them back so I can look at them again.
“Seventeen”
Elle whispered, she knew she was on thin ice with me. I closed my eyes. I knew the exact moment they were conceived. The senior trip to the lake.
“The lake.”
I couldn’t believe the nightmare that I had just walked into. I didn’t even know what to do or say. I was totally blindsided by this.
“I want to know now what the fuck you were thinking, Elleny.”
“The weekend of our going away party, I ended up in the hospital remember?”
I nodded once, Elle continued on.
“You interrupted a conversation between Rachel, Me and Bear.”
I didn’t nod this time so she didn’t stop.
“ I had just found out I was pregnant, that’s why I was so sick, I didn’t plan on anyone finding out, I was just going to leave town and move away, but then Bear and Rachel walked in and a nurse said something. I made them promise not to tell you. I knew you’d throw away your scholarship and then I kept picturing you resenting me for making you give up everything. So Bear made me a deal, he’d marry me and raise the baby as his own, if I gave up full contact with you. What we weren’t counting on were two babies. A boy and a girl. I ended up having them alone. Bear never showed up to the hospital, so when the lady came to fill out the birth certificate I didn’t put any father’s name on it. They have his last name but he’s not their legal father.”
As soon as she stopped I put my head in my hands and lowered my elbows to my knees.
“Names.”
She wouldn’t answer me.
“Elleny!”
I yelled louder from under my hands.
“JoJo’s name is Jordan Taylor Jackson.”
I had to make myself drag in breath at her confession. I couldn’t believe what my ears were hearing. I had a son and a daughter. I missed their whole lives. I was crushed. Hearing my daughter’s name I put the letters together.
I couldn’t help but chuckle at her using my initials in my daughter’s name.
“My initials.”
“Elle…”
“His name is Luc, Trevor.”
Right now, I was the last man she wanted to lie to anymore. I was not in the mood for this shit right now. I stood up so that she could understand the depth of my anger.
“Don’t you bullshit me…tell me his name!”
I howled as I looked down at Elle on the floor.
“Dylan Lucas Jackson”
Elle whispered, trying not to allow me to hear. I heard…I heard every fucking syllable of the name that I was supposed to name my son. How fucking dare her!!!
I went over to the table and grabbed the laptop off of it and hurled it right through the television that sat in the living room. Elle covered her head with my hands.
I continued to throw things and scream throughout the hotel suite. Elle stayed on the ground while I had my moment of destroying whatever I could get my hands on. I didn’t really care what she was doing or what she had to say at that very moment.
“Those were my babies, Elleny! I missed out on everything! You even had the nerve to name them names that I picked out that were meant for me and you! Not you and Bear!”
Elle looked up when she didn’t hear anymore items being thrown. I know she could see the tears that were streaming down my face.
“He’s going to try and take my kids, isn’t he?”
I could feel my jaw clenching as my anger started rising.
Elle quickly sat up and tried to grab a hold of my hands, I pulled them away from her. I couldn’t deal with her right now. She lied to me and put my children in danger.
