Personal Possessions, page 28
I finish off by licking around the tip of her ear. This must’ve rubbed her the wrong way, because she sat up faster than I’ve ever seen anyone move.
I wasn’t sure if I found her movements amusing or if it was still being intoxicated, but of course, I began laughing which only pissed Elle off more.
“TJ, I’m not jealous! There’s nothing to be jealous about. This…”
Elle points between the two of us as she huffs and puffs.
“…is nothing other than good reunion sex….that’s it hun. You are open to do whatever you would like to do with whomever you would like to do it with. This is not going any further than where it is. You’re not mine and I’m definitely not yours.”
Now I was sober. I was sober because she just stuck the knife straight through my heart. All I had done, the years of planning getting her away just the two of us was a complete waste. I had just given away two million dollars and my home for a woman who just admitted to me that I was nothing to her but reunion sex and finally I made a promise to bring back the girl that I loved since second grade, from a woman who didn’t even believe in love anymore. As if it couldn’t get any worse, shit got worse.
“The saying we used to say as kids to each other…we’re bendable, not breakable….remember that? It’s bullshit. We are breakable…always have been, always will be. Now, I suggest you lay down, and get some sleep seeing as you have an appointment first thing in the morning.”
For the first time in my adult life I remembered what it felt like to be that little boy, lying in bed, listening to his mom plead to be loved by a man who never held her heart. I felt vulnerable and something I worked so hard never to feel again in my life…weak. I didn’t know what else to say or to do. I was going to have to call Rachel tomorrow and tell her that I had failed. In seventeen years, I had never failed at anything I had set out to do; yet, here I sat, with the most important task right in front of me and I couldn’t break through.
“You remember that first day of school our second grade year…. My momma walked me into our classroom and I looked around, I wasn’t scared…I wasn’t nervous; hell, we knew everyone already. Then gazin’ across the kids, I saw ya over in the corner with Rach and Lils.”
As I talked, I could see the scene play out right in front of me as clear as crystal as though it had happened yesterday.
“I couldn’t’ believe it Elle…I gotcha in my class. I walked down each aisle of desks prayin’….no, beggin with the Lord that my desk could be next to yours. I came to my desk and saw your nametag on the desk next to mine…..and I knew then….right at that fucking moment, Elleny! So don’t sit there and tell me we’re not unbreakable.”
I looked down at Elle. I was desperate. If it took opening up, heart and soul to her, well goddammit, I’d do it.
“Open your eyes, Elle and look at me.”
Tears were running down her face, she could hardly talk she was sobbing so hard. I was breaking through, I wasn’t going to stop until I knocked the wall completely down and there was no way for her to block me out again.
“He’ll run off with my kids Trevor….he’ll kidnap my kids and take ‘em to Louisiana to those hillbilly fucks he calls family and they’ll hide my kids from me. I can’t risk it. I’ve lost everything in my life that meant something to me. I can’t lose my kids.”
“Is that why we can’t be together…is that the big reason why? “
I took a breath to calm myself down. It was out…the big secret. Bear did hold something over her head.
Shit Elle, I thought it was something big. We can deal with that, baby.”
I began rubbing circles on her back, physically asking her to calm down. Elle never said anything, she just laid there…staring straight ahead.
“No!”
Elle screamed as she darted from the bed.
“I’m not taking any chances with my kids! No man is worth that…trust me, I found out the hard way.”
Elle walked to her luggage and grabbed a pair of jeans and slipped them on.
“Wait…where are you going?”
She wouldn’t answer me, she just kept shaking her head.
“Goddammit Elle, at least tell me where you’re going?”
“I don’t know….for a walk maybe…. I’ll be back later, just get some sleep.”
Was she serious? Did she really think I would be able to sleep, knowing that she’s out walking around in the middle of the night? I laid there for a bit debating on following her, but then if she caught me, she’d leave saying I didn’t allow her privacy.
I laid in bed for a while. I looked at the clock; an hour had passed. I got up and paced the living room, I went to the kitchen and looked at the clock; half an hour had passed. Now I was beginning to get worried. What if something happened? I called down to the front desk.
“Front desk…”
“Yes, this is Mr. McHale in the penthouse, I have a female guest with me…”
The employee cut me off.
“Yes…Ms. Barker-Jackson.”
When the hell had she spoken with the front desk?
“Yes, ummm…can you tell me if she’s down there or possibly in the bar area?”
“No sir.”
“No sir what…you can’t tell me or she’s not there.”
I think I scared him because my voice was deep and demanding, I was not fucking around…this was important, but really…did he just say no sir to me and nothing else…maybe I was going to have to sit on this board.
“Uh sir…sorry sir…uh”
“Listen to me, sir…” I made sure to enunciate the sir, he was wasting valuable time here.
“Is she down there?”
“No sir”
“Can you see if she’s in the bar?”
“I see the bar, sir…she’s not in there. It’s empty.”
I didn’t even waste time saying goodbye, I just hung up. My worry was beginning to turn into apprehension. I didn’t know whether to start calling hospitals or start walking the streets.
I decided to walk along the streets. I threw on some sweat pants and a t shirt and jumped in the elevator as quick as possible. Hitting the lobby, I looked over at the front desk to memorize the gentlemen who was manning the phone so that I could be sure he has proper customer service training…my treat.
I jogged out the front door and headed towards the coffee house that Sam to Elle to that morning. I knew that she had been taken down that route so it would be familiar to her. I pushed myself. I needed to get rid of the alcohol in my system anyways, I thought as I headed to go find Elle.
I ended up spotting her four blocks down walking in front of an all-night café. I stopped jogging and placed my hands on my knees to catch my breath. Elle was fine…she was absolutely safe. I figured that I would give her the time she needed to think as I headed back to the hotel. As I got out of the elevator, I knew I wanted to grab a glass of water and head for the shower. I was feeling the hangover start to kick in and I needed a couple hours of rest. I made the decision that this weekend, was for nothing other than me and Elle. We were going to do everything that I had planned to do in these eight days, together in two.
I grabbed a shower and laid in bed…and waited for Elle to return…and waited. Six o’clock rolled around and I heard the front door close. Now that I knew she was back safely, I was fucking livid.
Elle tried to tiptoe around the room, until I startled her. I was exhausted from being up all night long; worried sick. I was hung over and my head was pounding and I wanted to know where the hell she had been all night.
“Where the fuck have you been?”
“I told you TJ, I was going for a walk.”
“TJ sweetie, we have to be in the office at nine. Let’s get you a shower, hun and some food in you, then you’ll feel good to go.”
“We’re not going.”
She was not expecting that, I could see it written all over her face.
“Trevor…that’s not an option. I could possibly push it back until later in the evening but they have to be done…today.”
Obviously, she didn’t understand when I said we weren’t going, I meant we weren’t going. Therefore, I showed her that we weren’t going.
I didn’t say a word, I just picked up my cell and hit the speed dial.
I heard Chris’ groggy morning voice pick up the phone.
“Morning, yeah I’m sorry to call so early, Chris, I need a favor. Go into Miss Barker’s schedule, print out all the appointments that she has set for today and tomorrow and email them to Sara Montgomery so that she can call and revise the schedule for next week.
“Sure, no problem, Mr. McHale. You have a good day.”
“I appreciate it…thanks you too.”
“Did you really fucking just do what I think you just did?”
“Yep.” I replied, I even popped the “p” at the end.
I could hear Elle mumbling underneath her breath as I walked into the bathroom to get a drink of water. It was driving her crazy that I wouldn’t fight back with her.
“What the fuck are you doing!”
Was she really going to lose her shit on me? I was the one who should be losing his shit, since she decided to go out all over a strange town during the middle of the night. I couldn’t contain my anger anymore.
“You wanna stay out all night long, make me fucking worry about you?”
I picked Elle up and tossed her on the bed, before falling on top of her caging her in so that she couldn’t escape; she wanted to know what the fuck I was doing, she was going to hear it. I made sure I got down in her face so she could hear every word I had to say.
“You wanna be selfish and not think of others with the stunts that you pull, Elleny…honey, I know you’re husband doesn’t give a shit about you, but I do dammit! When are you going to realize that?”
Elle attempted to push me away, but I wasn’t going anywhere; my feet were concreted to the ground.
“Really….you care so much for me huh….then who were you out with last night drinking at a bar with, huh?”
I wasn’t caught off guard with that, I knew she could smell the smoke along with the liquor on my breath as well as see me fucking drunk. She kept trying to push me off of her, so I got up and let her give her dramatic speech.
“Yeah, you think I’m a fucking amateur at smelling liquor and perfume on a man….trust me I live with a professional, Trevor. You didn’t just stumble upon a naive little girl who sucks up your bullshit as though it was liquid through a straw. Hmmm, let me guess….”
Elle put her index finger up to her lips and her eyes up to the ceiling as though she was actually contemplating thinking; so dramatic.
“….Maybe Sara? Hmm, no….she’s young enough to have a curfew, her momma done ground her if she steps in one minute after ten. Maybe some chick you picked up in the bar….oh, even better; the bar downstairs…..that would make it just fucking perfect. The woman that you supposedly have been pining over for seventeen years, upstairs dreaming of her wedding gown and what color flowers she will carry down the aisle while you pump and prod the “can’t- turn- a -whore –into- a- housewife” chick…”
Elle made her hand into a fist and started going up and down with it as though she was jacking off air. I was laughing at the visions she was giving me.
“Or…maybe you met up with Natasha.”
I turned my head quickly, the laughter had died down inside me with that. I thought to myself on who or how she would’ve known about Tasha…I knew the answer for how tonight all got started; Sara.
“Fucking Sara.”
I closed his eyes mentally ripping that bitch apart and then firing her; of course on a technicality so that I wouldn’t have to pay her unemployment.
“Well…why, I think I hit a sore spot with that one.”
It wasn’t a sore spot. I just wanted to tell Elle about Tasha in my own time, Sara took that option away from me. Grabbing her things, Elle started to head to the bathroom,
“What the fuck did she say to you?”
Her eyes looked back at me disappointed and brokenhearted. I was so confused and pissed off and sick to death of feeling these same fucking emotions almost every day.
“She said enough….oh and by the way, the seat for the next in line to have a nice royal fucking from you already has been acquired. So make sure you spout off all that bullshit you’ve been spouting off to me; she will definitely lick it up!”
I couldn’t take one more word from her fucking mouth. I had tried being nice TJ…he wasn’t cutting it. It was time to bring Trevor to the party. She wanted to fuck with me, that was fine…I would fuck right back. I was on her in three seconds flat. I got up behind her and pushed her against the wall.
I allowed her to have her own thoughts and feelings, she was having that. I would show her what she wanted…I could read it all over her. Elle loved me, she just didn’t want to admit it, because this was a tit for tat game to her and any day now, I would pack my shit and walk out that door…the way she did to me seventeen years ago.
This wasn’t a game to me…I didn’t know how to make her understand that. Tonight, she would never question it again.
I laid my body up against her. My cock was already hard. I made sure she could feel it. I ran my hand down her back until I felt the middle of her bra…no clasp; fuck…shit couldn’t be easy.
“Where the fuck is the clasp?”
I could hear my own voice shaking. I was wound tight, but I was holding back. I wanted to fuck her hard, so hard she wouldn’t remember anyone else but Trevor McHale.
Fuck it. I reached around with both hand and ripped it on the side. I would take her and buy a new one.
“It’s in the front.”
I ran my hands over her breasts, feeling her nipples get hard under my touch. I thrust my hips forward just as I pinched them; I heard Elle gasp. Her head went forward unto the wall where she rested against it. She was loving this. I leaned down beside her ear.
“I thought maybe since I was tired from being up all night long, worrying over you and having a pretty shitty hangover, I’d make love to you nice and easy this morning, maybe work off the rest of the alcohol that was left in my system after pacing the floor, but I see you had a different plan in mind.”
I ran my hand down her back until I reached her ass cheek. Elle’s curves were mouthwatering. Her smooth skin bubbled out into one fine ass. I gave it a quick, gentle slap; one that got her attention but also kept her on her toes.
“Ouch!”
“Now this is how this is gonna work. You get a choice…either I’m gonna fuck you like this, until you realize that I’m not that fuckin prick husband of yours and you blow your load all over me, just like you did the other mornin or… I’m gonna fuck you like this until you realize that my feelings for you are bigger than the both of us and you stop denying it. You’re also gonna stop thinkin that there is someone else that will be takin your place, because there never was and there never will be any other…”
I rolled my hips over her ass so that she could feel what I had in store for her.
“Obviously though, my words can’t scream that loud enough for you, so maybe my cock will. At least, loud enough for you to believe. Now what’s it gonna be, Elle?”
Nothing came out of Elle’s mouth; she made the choice to play this game.
“I’m waiting for your answer, Elleny.” I repeated rolling my cock against her ass.
“Oh I see….now all the sudden when I want you to open your mouth you wanna be tight lipped, huh….well since you wanna play this game that way, how bout I take away your choices and just fuck you. That sound good to you…I’ll take that as a yes”.
I lowered my face down to her neck and rubbed my nose up against her, breathing her scent in.
“You’re smell is an aphrodisiac to me.”
Since my hands were holding her hands up against the wall, all I really had was my nose to tease her with, so I went with it. I followed her spine feeling each bone as I pressed my nose up against her skin, breathing her into my soul.
“Spread your legs, Elle.”
Elle didn’t say anything to my request.
“Did you hear what I said to you?”
Zilch…zero…nada.
“Still nothing, huh…ok, well we can do this the hard way then. Whether you like it or not Elleny, I’m breaking you… do you understand me? I’m going to remove my hand from yours; if you move it…I’ll restrain you another way.”
I would never harm her, she knew that. I just needed to have her attention on herself and me right now. She needed to feel, not think, not listen…just feel what we became when we were together; One.
I followed, with my finger, the same path I made with my nose, except this time when I came to her ass, I didn’t stop. I could feel where I touched, goose bumps appeared. I continued down to her sweet spot.
The saying came to mind, if you follow the correct path, you’ll find exactly what you’re looking for. Well, I found exactly what I had been looking for.
I put my mouth up against Elle’s cheek as I sunk my fingers deep within her. I wanted to see her reaction when I did it. Of course, she closed her eyes and dropped her mouth open as she reveled in the pleasure.
“Mmmmm, I see you like this little game as much as I do; you’re sloppy wet, baby.”
I pulled my fingers out of her and pulled her sweetness around to the front of her.
“This right here…”
I began to rub circles around her clit faster.
“This is what’s going to give you away.”
Against my legs, I felt Elle spread her legs further apart, she was eating this up, although she wouldn’t verbalize it, her body betrayed her and spoke more than her words would ever say.
I started rolling faster over her clit, Elle gasped in gratification.
“Spread your legs further for me, baby.”
Immediately, she obeyed spreading farther apart. I didn’t want her to orgasm right away, so I pulled back and began running my fingers up inside her once more.
“Mmmmm, oh yeah… that’s the spot right there. This is the spot that I’m speaking to.”
