Warlock, page 25
“Mr. Tychov,” said teacher. “What do you think you’re doing?”
“I feel bad,” I said and went to her desk. I put paper on the top of it. “Can I go?”
She looked at me through her glasses:
“You can’t come back after you put your paper here.”
I just node and said:
“Thanks”
Stepping not quite confident I went to the toilet. There I had vomited. I haven’t breakfast today, so it was only bile. Then was a small period of shaking, and after a minute or so I could go to the outside. There I sat under the tree to the end of the lesson. Five minutes later Fred and Mary comes to me. Fred smiled:
“What was that?”
I waved with my hand, showing… Oh, fuck, showing that I don’t have an answer to this. Not a normal, or some bat shit crazy answer.
“Maneuver,” I had said at last. “We have a proverb: war is bullshit, main thing – is maneuver”
Mary frowned:
“I think that I’ll never understand your proverbs.”
“Look,” said Fred, who always find them interesting, like a puzzles. “It’s about importance and…”
I do not listen to them after that words. I thought about Mara. She was confident in her answer, that one that she called “wrong”. How does this come? Can one part of one brain have a better memory then other? Someday I saw one tv-program on discovery or geo… I do not remember details (Irony, huh?). In that show group of people need to go through path with markers of interest. They were some signs, trees, and even at one time there was soldier standing and looking at them. Then they answer on the set of questions about their trip and go home. Magic starts after a week, when that group of people were gathered second time, and they answered on that test one more time. What a bullshit they wrote! That was almost totally failed readings! They lied, but not intentionally, their brains lied to them!
And then I recall one simple fact – Mara is a guest in my brain too. She lives here, use it and what the fuck – can make worse jokes than that. Then I decided to take a break from her. As long as I can. It was pretty nice experiment, but it scares me now.
On the weekend we’ll meet with Fred and Mary and will go to the movie. In our town we haven’t theatre, but we discussed it – on the way there we would ride on Mary’s parent’s car, and way back – my mom. So, I hope that I’ll spend a weekend without Mara.
At all.”
“Diary entry #39.
It was awful night and day.
Mara was offended as I can judge from a bad dreams, and whisper that I hear all night. Just like first time – woman’s voice, but it wasn’t low. Seems like someone playing with volume on the radio – louder-lower-off-just a little louder – FUCKING LOUD! And so on. I think that it was because of tiredness of my brain – some time it can hold Mara inside, and other time – she breaks through my defense.
Anyway, I had a little time to sleep.
School wasn’t better at all, except of one moment – I pass yesterday test. Everything else – was muted almost all day. It was like hearing all around from a deep. All voices, all sounds were low and at some distance from me. And all the world was full with some sticky liquid, like jelly – nobody hurries, nobody can perform any fast moves or doings. All speed was divided by two.
One or two times I saw Mara. Like a Tyler Darden in a first fifteen minutes of “Fight Club” she appeared on second or two. In the end of the hall. Sitting on the other side of the cafeteria. Under the tree, in the shadows…
Oh! There was one more thing that you can call nice – I met cop dog today, right at six PM she pulled one of the policemen outside. I say hello to them, and make some joke about mood of the dog.
Policemen answered to me from a deep sea of today’s universe that he hates Dr. Pavlov because his study of the reflexes. The previous owner of this dog was an old cop, who worked here, and he teaches this dog to go to pee at some determined time. A cop said that it felt time, and near the right one it counts carefully. I smiled to dog and to cop, and most of all – to myself, because a trap on the bullies was set.
I can’t see my words properly.
Hope that this night would be better.”
“Diary entry #40.
Hello, my dirty diary…
Fuck you! Fuck you! Fuck YOU!!!
I’m so mad, you even can’t imagine. Today’s one of my father’s long shifts. When he has some long project, he can work at office and stay there for a couple of days, and after that spend all day, or a couple of them at home. So, he was absent today. And he left my mom in charge. And she decided that it was a nice thing to drink glass or couple, or WHO CARES!!! Fuck! She was drunk when I rung her from a stop in front of the cinema!
That was horrible! I rang and rang her, and she doesn’t pick the phone! I saw thousands of horrors in my mind in these couple minutes! I saw fire, homicides, heart attacks and whatever else! And then she picked up the phone, and all that was only my imagination – I hear her voice… Or…That what left from it…
Thanks God, I invented some story fast, and told it to Fred and Mary – I’m even don’t remember about what it was about – some ankle injuries or something with a car. But… But it was so … Embarrassing, shame and… shabbiness (for last word I need to thank to google.).
So fuck this day! Fuck mom and her alcohol!
Oh… I hear woman’s voice…
Fine, another try of Mara. I’ll talk with her.
So long, my dirty diary! And fuck you too!!!”
“Diary entry #41.
Sunday morning, and… You never guess what happened yesterday.
I was mad about mom and booze issue, and decided that it’s a perfect mood to talk with Mara. So I called her, and she appeared in front of me.
“Hey,” she said without any intro. “What do you think you doing? You…”
“Shut up, Mara!”
She stopped rapidly:
“Wh…” She began, but I do not let her such chance, interrupted:
“I said shut up! We had a deal. And you almost ruin it. Do not forget, who own this head.”
She looked at me with some curiosity and playfulness:
“I never saw you in a such state before,” she said smiling. “What’s happened?”
I told her briefly about mom, and she smiled little wider:
“Hm,” she looked into my eyes. «That means that nobody would interrupt us, yes?”
“What are you talking about?”
She stepped to me:
“I know that you thought about this before…”
Another step.
“And I know that you think about this now…”
Her breast touches me and I felt her warmth:
“The best thing is that you do not know my thoughts.”
And then she kisses me. My heart almost jumped out, my breath stopped and I felt wet tender touch of her lips. Then she slightly pulls back and whispered:
“All that you want. All your fantasies you can do with me. With your fantasy.”
And I do not know, when I was going to sleep. Three? Four?
Ok, I know that technically it was masturbation. But fuck it was awesome! And I don’t give a shit is she was real or not – my feelings and fantasies were real at that moment. Anyway, sex it’s mostly your own reactions to something that happen to you, right? And all things that happens to you – it’s technically your own impression about things around, impression that create your own brain. So, if Mara (part of my brain) creates images and feelings for me, and other parts of my brain (me) have its own image about things around – then I can tell that for me yesterday sex was perfectly real. Despite that it was masturbation.
And thanks to Mara I slept without any dreams. ”
Chapter 14
When Jim opened his eyes for the next time, he saw Alex sitting at his laptop.
“What time is it now?” Helper asked.
“It’s five a.m.,” answered Alex. “You have a couple of hours to sleep.”
“Ok,” said Helper and turned on the other side.
Meanwhile, Alex returned to the screen. He hoped that his night watch would give him some result. He stood up fifteen minutes ago, because of his sleepless previous night, he can't stand all night today. He decided to write to Eve, former Antony’s classmate, and hoped for her answer. He looked at the chat window for five minutes, but there was nothing except his own “Hello.”
Alex makes a plan of this day in the text redactor. It would be a blitz poll of main characters of this story. He had questions to Antony’s dad, to Ms. Prey, to eve and to Fred. But narrator of “ABnormal” perfectly understood that his partners with a great probability would be angry. That’s why he played with the questions, trying to make them as calm as possible. He wrote a letter to Janine, asking her to find some information, and just sends it when unmuted chat make a sound, that means response.
Barns opened chat window and saw:
“Hello.”
Then after a moment of “typing” appeared:
“I’m not expected your message.”
“Good…” Alex wanted to write “night”, but type “day” instead. “I received additional information and have a couple of questions to you. Can you help me?”
“Yes,” Eve typed.
“Ok. Thanks. You said that you argued with Antony, “He makes a scene,” you said. Nevertheless, do not tell that you were a couple. Why?”
Barns expected that chat would close, and can imagine a girl on the other side, who hold cursor near the red button. But some time later “typing” appeared, and Alex exhaled with a relief.
She wrote:
“What’s the difference? He banned me that day and called a whore and a bitch in much worse expressions.”
Words appeared one after another, Alex felt her anger, but was glad that she didn’t drop chat.
“He screamed at me across the fucking ocean. Why do I need to read it, and then – write to you???! You had your story with a nice guys from school from a different part of a world. So why do you ask it now?”
Barns felt like a sapper – one wrong move, and his interlocutor would explode. He wrote:
“I want to ask you, do you remember next couple of days?”
“What do you mean?”
Barns, remembering information from a diary formed a question:
“I think that Antony might try to curse you.”
There was a little pause, and then appeared on the screen:
“Are you serious?”
“I hope so, but as I can see, you can’t recall something like that.”
“Yes,”
Alex smiled. Now he felt like idiot sapper who would cut wires on his own luck:
“Also, I know that you were a much closer, and even had sex. Is it true?”
“FUCK YOU!!!!!”
That was last that she wrote. Then chat was logged off, and Alex understood that he was banned.
He looked on the clock in the corner of a laptop, and thought about plans to the next day. He was sure that all his interviews would be like this one, but sometimes swearing or refuse can tell you much more then empty words. At last, he had the most confident source in this situation, and only thing that he needed – approving of the dead boy’s words.
Barns looked on the watch one more time, and looked by the window. Raindrops were nearly notable on the dark grey skies. Music of the prolonged rain played the role of a lullaby, and he decided to lay down for a couple of hours. Do not take off his clothes, he lied on the bed. Fifteen minutes later, he was asleep.
---
When Alex woke up and turn off his alarm clock, he was not glad that he lied to sleep in the morning. Maybe, everyone knows this effect: when you got up early – you feel good, and if you decide to sleep one hour more – you get up totally broken. Alex had to collect himself in parts, and all the king’s men would be absolute losers in this case.
He can't recover to first cup of coffee. Narrator of the “ABnormal” thought that this was because of rain, that didn’t stop for this time. Sometimes more, sometimes less – rain do not stop pouring. In addition, when he finished his short story at the same time finished his pie. Alex turned from the torrents of water on the glasses of windows, and looked at Jim:
“So, what do you think about this?”
“Fa-fo,” said Helper, and then swallow up his piece of pie. “I think that this day isn’t necessary thing…”
Alex tried to interrupt him:
“What d…”
Helper lift his pam:
“Look. I perfectly understand your searching of information. And you got it, in this diary. What’s the difference about anyone else? Someone can say that he was just a sick nerd, and someone would repeat a great ending of your second interview with Eve.”
“How do…”
Jim waved with his palm, which was lifted all this time:
“No matter. We have a story. We have his truth, Antony’s. What else?”
Barns opened his mouth and started:
“I just…” but then he stopped and deepened in his thoughts. “His truth you say, huh…”
Jim nodded, cut another piece of pie and sipped a coffee.
“Well…” finally said Alex. “I want to check, what part of his story can take part in my world. How in this universe can exist things what I see, and things that he wrote there. In all, I want to walk by his road, and see what he saw.”
Jim smiled sarcastically, took with a tooth a piece of pie from a fork, and said to Alex, pointing with a fork on him:
“Please, do not step aside from a golden bricks, ok?”
Alex nodded and smiled too:
“Sometimes you can see valuable things only on a side from main road,” he sipped a coffee, and for a second looked aside, and then return his eyes to his friend. “There was one strange doctor some time ago. It was a genetic, and he was a racist. It was a long time ago, and then it was normal. And he tried to find what a difference between people with a different skin color on the genes level. He did a huge research and finds that genes are identical. It was a mistake, right? But it gives a result to that man.”
“He stopped to be a racist?”
“No, he became an alcoholic. “
Guys looked at one another, and begin to laugh. They finished their breakfast and went to the van. There Jim awaited when Alex put some calls. First, he tried to call to Ms. Prey. When Alex tapped a red button on a phone and started to find next number, he received a message. It was from Ms. Prey, and he opened it and read:
“Mr. Barns, I thought I told you not trying to connect with me.”
Alex smiled, and write in answer:
“I know everything about you and Antony’s father.”
He sends it and waited for a two minutes for an answer. It was a new sms, and he opened it:
“Then, nothing to say”
It was all.
Alex smiled. He knew that second interview would be impossible, but for now, he cannot say that he tried. He wrote in answer:
“Do you think that your arm is enough vengeance?”
He awaited five minutes and wrote:
“I know that Antony thought that isn’t enough.”
Another five minutes, and another sms from Alex:
“He tried to do something more. Do you want to find what?”
This time sms returned to him after re-sending to another number. Barns understood that she was somehow banned him. At least now, Alex can say, that he tried to the end. He looked through his phone book and finds next number. When he found it, he tapped on it, and display shows “Antony’s dad.” However, he does not pick a phone.
Cursing, Alex wrote in a social network private message for a Fred:
“Hi, Fred. I found some new information about Antony’s case. You lied to us. I know the truth.”
There almost was not delays before answer:
“I doubt it.”
“Can we talk?”
There was a pause, and Fred answered:
“We can talk here.”
Alex smiled, he knew that Ms. Prey is a dead end, but Fred would agree for an additional talk. That is why he attacked:
“No, it’s not for a chat. Where can we talk face to face?”
Five minutes later Fred wrote:
“In an hour, meet me at the mall, “An avenue” café. You’ll have thirty minutes.”
“Thanks,” typed Alex smiling.
He turned to Jim and said where they would go. And when an engine was started, Alex’s phone buzzed. Even without looking on the screen, he knows who it is.
“Good day, Mr. Tychov,” said Alex. “How are you?”
“Fine, Mr. Barns. You had called to me. I’m sorry, I can’t talk. You needed something from me?”
Alex, still smiling, nodded:
“Yep. A truth.”
“What do you mean? I do not…”
“I’m afraid that you understand me perfectly, Mr. Tychov. You lied to me. And I want to know a true story from you.”
After a moment of silence, man with changed tone of voice said:
“What do you allow yourself?”
“I know that incident with Mr. Prey hand – is a vengeance for your affair with her. I know that you had intoxication one time, just after you give Antony some pills. I know…”
“How do you find it?” asked Luc with a cold voice.
“It doesn’t matter, Mr. Tychov. What do matter – is what you tell me. Can we talk today?”
Alex wait for an answer for a couple of seconds then Antony’s father answered:
“Eight P.M. At “Nancy’s”
And without saying goodbye, he put down the phone. Alex smiled looking on Jim. Last one looked on a friend expectantly.
“Two interviews,” Barn’s said. “First – Fred, second – Luc at evening”
He put a cap on his baldhead, and close his eyes, and said “Two more.”
---
“Diary entry #42.
Another boring day at school.
