Warlock, page 10
Alice looked on her injured hand:
“I know that it’s would be with me forever, but I can’t live here knowing that it’s still here.” she stands and took her purse. “Well, all that I can do in this situation is to help you to descend to hell faster. As I had promised to your friend,”
Saying this, she gave Jim a paper with some addresses and telephones. Now was Helper’s turn to smile:
“Thank you, Ms. Prey.”
“No. For such thinks, you cannot say this. Bye.”
She left money on the table and went to the door. Guys looked after her for a couple of minutes, and only after that time Jim shake his head and turn off his camera:
“That was creepiest interview for all that we had done, buddy”
“Giaconda,” Alex said. “Just as I told you – this is would be our Giaconda”
---
“Diary entry #17.
Helooooo, my filthy diary!
Thanks to you, I can remember some things much better. For example, I almost forgot that dream about wasteland. You can ask me how’s that, but when you are preparing to school with hot teacher – it’s pretty easy.
Last time we had an almost perfect lesson, dedicated to the “Lord of a flies”, talking about it, analyzing it’s influence, etc.
Ms. Prey asked me to write an essay about it. It was totally red from the grammar mistakes, but she said that it had nice sense. She gave me an advice – to write simpler sentences. It’s pretty hard, when you use to construct your thoughts in two or three parts in everyone. But I’ll try.
So, I said that its almost universal theme describes in a novel. She asked, “almost”? And I said – yeah, because I think that we live in an era of human evolution in a sense of society. That even body evolution doesn’t stop – it changes its own direction and make a small step. For example – almost thirty percent of birth children have twenty-eight teeth. Twenty years ago it number was two times less. And so on.
But society changes even less noticeable. Internet change things radically, and despite that fact that there is people in the Earth that live in tribes for this days, most of us can’t imagine our lives without browser. Social nets – next step of this changes. Humanity doesn’t recognize these things and probably wouldn’t in a future. But impact of this things is much greater then Spanish invasion in America or Neanderthals domination. We had changed forever.
Despite all that things, if you took a group of people into isolate area you can watch all that things that happen with kids in a book. Yeah, our heritage from apes is much greater and much deeper that we thought, and every living thing that now plays in MMO, scrolling Facebook or writing this dirty words become a savage when all this gone an all that bothers you – is a surviving.
And my main thought that in a couple of hundred years this may be changed. Because of changing of our way of thought. Because of evolution that now works silently and faster.
Once I saw a TV where one scientist shows two hammers. Identical rocks that tied to a sticks. They were made by our ancestors. And that man in a white robe said – that difference between them is a couple of thousands of years. Thousands! And now look at me – I saw diode lamps and cards with a holes to program first computers, and now children don’t understand how it is – to sit near the telephone, because your friend said that he would call to you. And that changes I saw during my life. No wonder that some of us became crazy as a mad hatter – they can’t evolve so rapidly. But thanks to silicon god – that insane part of humanity is too small. Most of us tapping our smartphones and checking Facebook after sleep before brushing teeth.
But “Lord…” is still may happen. And I think that I would feel it on my skin in a first day at school. I’m perfectly know how it is – to step in a new group. I said to Ms. Prey, and she said that in any case I can count on her, and tell her everything. I smiled and said that suicide wouldn’t so cruel compare to talking to the teacher.
“No offence, Ms. Prey, but if you have problems in a class – teacher is a last resort.”
She smiled and agreed, but said if it would be need – she can be that resort. (Oh God, how many dirty thoughts and jokes I had that second).
That was one of the best days here. She left me for the next lesson other book and fantasies about her. You see, my filthy diary, life can be pretty nice. ”
“Diary entry #18.
So, my dirty diary, thoughts about “tulpa” was forgotten for a week or two. But then, last night I was woke up by girl’s voice. For a moment I thought that I lay on a dirty street from my dream, but then I understood that it was a cold floor of my own room. That was creepy. I can’t tell even to myself why I was lying on the floor, but it wasn’t a sleep for sure – when I got up I saw a figure. Before I’m understand that I see a mirror – I hit it. The surface got a crack – the best evidence of night episode. In my culture a broken mirror is a bad thing, so I throw it in the morning.
I can’t sleep, so I turned on my laptop, and loaded browser to search info about that girl.
I find out that this “tulpa” is a tricky thing. Roots of it you can find in Tibetan practices if you want to, but, I’m afraid that google can’t index them properly. So, I read that things that internet knows about it. And knowing is… Strange.
For the beginning – it’s a spiritual practice of visualization of your senses – visuals, sound, etc. It’s very similar to that things that kids do with so-called imaginary friends. They do it without any purpose – just at that time their brain need to train imagination, and touch border of real life where it crosses our imagination. Tulpa needs you to step over that border, and imagine something on demand. Imagine, like it’s real things.
“It’s a schizophrenia” – some of you can tell. But the funniest thing – no, and it’s not. Schizo – is a mentally ill person, who can’t determine all that things – imaginary or real – he can’t refer to them differently. He emphasizes them like they are all real. Tulpa – is another case – you took it from your brain and put in front of you. It’s look, and its voice, everything – depends on you. And you know that it is your imagination.
And here begins its trickiness. It’s like a leak in a valve. Tulpa – it’s anomaly of our brain, and if you create it – you must do some damage to your brain valves. Just a little – so it can drip with a little doses of madness on purpose. And when you’d want to get rid of it? Or leak become too large? Internet full of such a stories. They have the same pattern as: “I create it, and it fun, it began to irritate me, oh look – I’m in a madhouse.” To be true to the end there are good stories too like “I played with it some period, and then I understood that I do not need it, and it’s faded”, “She said that I do not need her and vanished” or even “I ate my Tulpa and got its power”. Stories like last one was rare, but there were a couple of them.
It’s hard to separate truth from fiction, especially in the field of internet stories like this. Hey, it may be a viral city horror story like the Slender-man.
But you know what? I believe that if you think that something is real – part of it is already in our world – because of you, believer. You are transmitter of yours believes, and its materialization depends on you. So, there are Slender out there, and Tulpa have its own seed of truth. And, looking on the last events, my own Tulpa makes a step to me, by herself. I’ll find a manual for Tulpa’s creation, manual for security from Tulpa, and meet her. After all – waking up on the floor is too much for me. ”
Chapter 8
They had finished their dinner and came into their room in the hotel hour and a half lately. Jim lay down on the bed:
“Sorry, dude, I can’t sit with you – that interview leave me without any strengths.”
Alex nodded:
“It’s all right. I will sit here to chat time with his classmate. Once again – at what time it will be?”
“Two A.M.,” Helper answered.
“Ok,” Alex said. “Just one thing – please, backup interview with Alice, and give a copy to me. Anyway, I need to do something for…” he looked ad his smartphone, “…for three hours”
“That’s two things,” Jim said connecting his camera to computer.
Two hours and a cup of coffee later Alex sat in the couch of their room, looking at his notepad, listening for a third time whole interview with Alice Prey.
It was a pity that she doesn’t allow them to film it, but even in audio format, it was a good work. He marked time with that emotion that he can restore from his memory – her fierce glance, her smiles, her fierce smiles. He does not show his own emotions nor to her, nor to Jim, but like his friend he was pretty scared with her. It was not about a story – they had heard even scariest and weirdest tales, but her attitude… Even now, cold wave run at his spine.
There was a lot of questions after its interview. First that he noted – they need to know everything about car crash – what, when, why? Second – Antony’s expulsion – Alice said that then there was something wrong with him for sure. Third – small things. How it’s describes Alice – Blood, creepy things and sex. A little story like her mockingbird with a needle. Alex does not think that it was Antony’s job, but sucks little details always make story more interesting and colorful. And the fourth thing that he had noted with a smile - thermal grease – what was that?
Half of the time that had left to chat Alex read about that mystique grease. It was something like joke in a computer world. Indeed, that thing, if you do not know this ability after its use can left smears on hands and things near workspace. “Not a perfect metaphor” thought Alex, but he thinks that it describes perfectly what does Alice meant.
Then he makes another cup of coffee, third or fourth – he does not know and logged on a social network, where Jim accounted his chat with a former classmate of Antony. Twenty minutes later, he saw cherished green circle above his contact’s avatar.
“Hello,» he printed.
“Hello” printed his interlocutor. Her name was Eve.
“Thank you for agreeing to give interview.”
“You’re welcome,” she wrote. “Sorry for my English – it may be bad, or I take time to translation.”
“That’s all right. Do Jim told you about what thing I want to ask you?”
“Anton,” she answered, after a second added “?”
“Yes. How long do you knew him?”
“From a kindergarten. Then we came to school. We were in one class, until he went.”
“It was close friendship or something more?”
“Do you mean is he was mine BF?”
Alex was pleased to see an international abbreviation. Smiling he answered:
“Yes”
“No, just friends. But maybe he thought in other way…”
“Why do you think so?”
“He made a scene after … month, maybe… He saw pictures in my portfolio with a guy, and jealous and named me with a bad words… I had banned him, and not talking with him…”
“I see” Alex printed. It was pretty weird to make an interview is this way, but he thought that it would have an awesome look in the episode, and even better in the book.
“How can you describe him?”
“Hm…” she printed then, after a minute printed. “He was casual. Normal. We were calm, he does not wasted his energy for everything. Like a spring – if he does something, he uses all his strength in that direction.”
“Anything wrong? Scary? Creepy?”
“No, in that way”, she put a smile after that phrase.
He felt something interesting here:
“But in some way?”
Another pause while she writes. Then text appeared on the screen silently as Alex muted his computer:
“I think that you can tell that he doesn’t belong to this area, to this people. Like he always had a huge part inside of himself. I don’t know how to yell it to you… Maybe, like this – he was always on his mind, he had a large invisible shield, and hided beside him. All his secret thoughts, and looking at him you may think that there were a lot of them,”
Barns asked straightly:
“Do you know what happened with Antony?”
Three dot’s that mean printing status danced for a minute, and then answer appeared:
“Only in general. Something about killing his classmates. But not any details”
Alex sipped coffee and then looked above the cap on sleeping Jim, afraid that his midnight journalism make a lot of noise, but his friend sleeps deep.
“Did he have a penchant for such things? Was he aggressive? Fights in a school?”
“No. “ That answer was fast, and after a couple of seconds “He was even shy a little. He was with a popular company. He was a friend to the girls.”
“Friend to the girls? How’s that?”
“Well… Boys can be rude or even a little cruel in attempts to be seen with a girl, you know – a little kicks, jokes, tugging at a pigtail.”
Alex printed, and without noticing nodded:
“Oh, I see,”
“He can tell a dirty joke, or laugh on you, but… Not offensive. He was a nice boy.”
“Thanks. Eve, was he a religious? Something, in this case, is connected with some mystery things.”
“Like all of us.” She answered. “We have an orthodox country, we all baptized in childhood, but “religious” … I don’t think so.”
“Maybe sects? Or some cult devotions?”
“No.” But there were another three dots and Alex thought that he will wait for answer. She printed after a minute: “He was fond of mystic thrillers. You know – “Exorcist”, “Blair witch”, “Nightmare on Elm Street”, and so on… But you rather call him a movie geek, then a cultist.”
Alex starts to print his next question when “Stop” appeared at the chat screen.
“Almost forgot – there was one episode.” She wrote this, and next two minutes was for Barns like an hour. He looked with apprehension on the screen, and at last, text appeared. His heart stopped, when he saw next lines:
“Once he visited some meeting of so-called wizards or witches, I don’t know how it sounds in English. He told that this meeting was in the local cemetery, at midnight. They even cut a cat with the knife. But then it becomes a joke, because Antony saw that knife was fake, and it was constructed to spill blood, imitating a cut. We laughed about this case, so I almost forgot it”
Alex noticed that he was not breathing. He made a calm sigh, and then wrote:
“Do you remember, why does he visited that company?”
“No.” She answered quickly. “He said that he saw them in the internet. And knowing that in that time computers and net was a rare thing – I may admit that that was bored rich kids”
“Antony’s family was rich?”
“Not too much, but above average,” she said. “But this never affected on him.”
Alex feels like luck slipped from his hands.
“And there was nothing else in such way?”
A minute passed. He yawned.
“Not related to him, or... I do not know…I had a dream. I saw some old church and him, performing some ritual”. Eve answered.
Alex sighed again – they moving in wrong direction. He decided to change a theme:
“Do you know why they move out?”
“Just rumors. One people says that his father was a fair businessman, and that the local politics wanted a piece of his money, other said that he was a part of a gang, and run with his and their money.”
He rubbed his eyes and printed:
“Their family – was it normal? Any visible conflicts, any abnormalities?”
He smiled with the last word.
“I’m always wanted family like his”, Eve answered. «Nothing wrong by sight, at least.”
“Thanks, Eve. You make me a pleasure to talk with you. Do you want to say something that we may put in our episode about Antony?”
Three dots perform their dance, and Alex feels that slumber gets closer to him. He feels its warmth, and furry nice paws that cover’s him. One minute, two, three. Then, her answer appeared:
“I just want to tell you that Anton was a good nice guy. With his dignity and disadvantages, but he was not a mad killer. Not that boy, whom I know, who live here. And if that story is true… Something may happen with him there.”
Alex writes down one thought in his notepad:
“Something happens with him here.”
Then she added:
“Just that”, and after a second “Thank you, Alex.”
“Have a nice day.”
Typed this he saves chat in a blank file, close browser and shut down the computer. He rubbed his eyes, and trying to step as silently as he can he goes to the bathroom. It was a long day for him and their project. He almost feels all that weight that they find today in form of facts, thought and gossips on his own shoulders. He brushed his teeth with a closed eyes and dreamy head, and in a five minute, he was asleep in his bed.
---
Alex opened his eyes, and first thing, that he saw was smiling face of Helper. He sat on the couch with the laptop on his legs, drinking a coffee. Barns can’t understand what’s going on and what had awake him. A second after when he sat on the bed, he decided that it was a complex of things – smell of coffee and sunlight.
“Oh, I wish I can see your face, when she said that”, said Jim, putting his finger to the screen.
“What time is it now?” Alex asked.
Helper move his eyes to the corner of the screen.
“It’s almost twelve,” he said. “Quite a helpless interview”
Alex rubbed his face, murmuring:
“Nah, but it gives us zero level”
“What do you mean?” asked Jim closing laptop.
“We can see what kind of person he was before…” Alex yawned. “… Before all this. Can you bring me a coffee?”
