Collective Identity, page 5
part #4 of Commitment Series
"My, what firm cheeks you have, grandma," said the voice.
Again, Billie answered. "All the more to please you with, wolf."
The reference to wolf drew a deep chuckle from the disembodied voice behind her.
Moments later, the jeans and panties lay in a heap around Billie's ankles.
"Kick them off," the voice whispered into her ear, sending shivers of desire coursing through her.
The jeans were soon in a pile against the wall.
Next, the hands moved under the front of Billie's T-shirt and massaged her breasts before moving around to the back, kneading the firm muscles across her shoulders. Billie soon found her shirt being pulled upward over her head, only to join the pile of denim against the wall. The unseen force grabbed Billie's wrists and pressed Billie's hands against the door once more, then trailed a path of desire up and down her biceps.
"My, what strong arms you have, Grandma," the sultry voice said again from over her shoulder.
Billie's eyes were squeezed shut. She took a deep breath and said shakily, "All the more to pl—Oh God!" she cried as she felt teeth sink into the taut muscle stretched across her shoulder blade. "God!" she said again as her knees buckled.
Suddenly, in one movement, she felt the clasp of her bra release as her breasts were freed from their lace prison. The hands grabbed her shoulders and spun her around, forcing her back into the door. Billie opened her eyes and looked into the passion filled depths of Cat's smoldering green eyes, realizing for the first time that Cat was totally naked. Neither could look away.
Cat’s chest rose up and down rapidly. "Could I do this to my grandmother, Billie?" She took Billie's breast into her mouth and clamped down on the nipple until Billie cried out in ecstasy.
Billie was helpless, paralyzed by desire where she stood.
Cat let her hands freely roam around Billie's body, pushing her closer and closer to the edge of oblivion. Cat suddenly dropped to her knees and invaded the very depths of her core with such abandon, that Billie literally sank to the floor in a boneless puddle of flesh, her body wracked with spasms. Cat lay with her and held her close while whispering words of endearment until Billie slowly returned to herself. Several moments passed before Cat could convince Billie to rise from the floor and move to the bed. As they lay entwined, she pulled Cat close and held her tight.
"Cat, I have never felt so complete and fulfilled in my life. Just when I think I know you inside and out, you do this to me. I love you with everything I am, even if I do remind you of your grandmother," Billie said, chuckling at the personal joke. "Let me love you, Cat. I want to make you feel as good as I do right now. Please," she added.
Cat raised herself onto her knees and leaned over Billie. She placed kisses along her breastbone to Billie's neck, working her way up her throat to her left ear. "I love you," she whispered before clamping down on Billie's earlobe with her teeth.
"Oh god!" Billie exclaimed. Her chest thrust upward as bolts of desire invaded the depths of her core once more. She tightened her hold on Cat. "Cat, do you know what you're doing to me?" she asked. "I'm supposed to be making love to you!"
"I can't get enough of you, Billie," Cat said. She lay there, breast to breast, resting her elbows on either side of Billie's head. She placed several kisses on her mouth, gently exploring Billie's lips and finally demanding entrance into the moist depth.
Billie's hands roamed up and down Cat's naked back as their tongues danced in exploration, entwining, probing, thrusting, tasting and evoking a raging tide of emotions within both women.
Soon, the battle escalated from passionate kissing to vigorous caresses. Hands roamed freely and aggressively over bare skin. Cat's nails raked in a crisscrossing pattern over Billie's back, leaving raised welts in their wake. Bolts of desire followed in the wake of Cat's nails, settling in her groin and driving her mad with need. Locking their legs together, Billie flipped them over until she was lying on top of Cat.
"My turn," Billie said before diving into Cat's mouth, shoving her tongue deep into Cat's throat, while Cat squirmed with desire beneath her.
"Billie. Billie, please. I need you," Cat pleaded between kisses. Cat wove her fingers into Billie's long black hair, and held her head close.
Billie moved her caresses to Cat's neck, nipping and biting a trail down her neck and across her collar bone. With each bite, Cat moaned loudly, praising any god that would listen, for bringing this remarkable woman into her life.
Billie began a very slow descent down the length of Cat’s body. She stopped to savor Cat's breasts, teasing and nipping, until the nipples were standing at attention. Cat squealed with desire as Billie pinched and suckled each one between her teeth, pulling at them until the pain exceeded the point of comfortable tolerance. Cat cried out as the pain became too intense to bear, providing Billie with the signal she needed to back off.
Releasing the swollen nub suddenly, Billie watched as the now red nipple throbbed and pulsed in time with Cat's ragged breathing.
By the time she repeated the process on the other breast, Cat was beside herself with need and longing. Her own seduction of Billie, combined with the assault she was presently undergoing, pushed her to the limits of endurance. She was about to go over the edge, with or without Billie's help. She placed her hands on Billie’s shoulders and pushed her down toward her throbbing center.
"Oh god, Billie, please take me. I can't wait any longer!"
Billie looked into Cat's face and smiled.
"Patience, my love. I will make you mine... soon," she teased before continuing to place a trail of kisses down Cat's abdomen.
Cat thrust her hips upward toward Billie, begging for fulfillment. Cat's head was thrown back into the pillows. Her hands clutched the bed sheets on both sides of her hips as her chest arched upward… eyes closed, lips moist and parted as her brow creased with the effort to contain the desire that threatened to overcome her.
Billie was awestruck at the sight before her eyes. The pure seductive nature of Cat's appearance nearly pushed Billie over the edge. Unable to control herself any longer, Billie dove into Cat, tasting, biting, caressing, and feasting on the uniqueness that could only be described as Cat.
Cat screamed Billie's name over and over as desire surged in her loins, growing with intensity and spreading throughout her entire being until it overwhelmed her senses. Finally, when Billie sensed that Cat could not withstand any more, she filled her core with an intensity that surprised them both.
The sudden, unexpected invasion pushed Cat completely to climax. The frenzy that had started in her loins suddenly exploded into a multimedia light show inside Cat's brain. Billie continued her ministrations as spasms uncontrollably wracked Cat's body, sending her into sensory overload, and causing her to momentarily lose consciousness. Retracting her fingers, Billie gathered Cat in her arms and held her tenderly as Cat came back to earth and slowly returned to herself.
As Billie held Cat close, she could feel wetness on her shoulder where Cat rested her head. She arched her head back and tilted Cat's chin upward. She was immediately alarmed by the tears flowing from Cat’s eyes.
"Cat, what is it? Did I hurt you?"
Cat shuddered slightly in Billie's arms.
"No, love. You could never hurt me. I am just so overwhelmed by what I feel right now, that I can't contain it. Billie, I love you like I have never loved another soul. Promise me that we will always be together. I love you with everything I am."
Billie lowered her head and placed gentle kisses across Cat's lips.
"Cat, never in my life could I possibly express my love for you in such an eloquent way. You have spoken my own heart with your words. I love you too, little one, and I promise I will never leave you. I don't exist without you, Cat."
Billie gathered Cat in her arms.
"Sleep, my love," Billie said as she pulled the sheet up around them both.
"Are you convinced now that I don't think of my grandmother when I make love to you?" Cat asked.
"Grandmother? What grandmother?" Billie answered with a slight chuckle in her voice before drifting off to sleep.
Chapter 5
"More coffee?" Billie asked as she carried the coffee carafe to the table.
"Please." Cat pushed her cup toward Billie without looking up from the papers strewn on the table before her.
Billie smiled as she watched Cat pour over the notes they had taken from information found in Doc and Ida's attic the previous day. After refilling her own cup, she returned the pot to the warmer and rejoined Cat at the table.
"Okay, Billie," Cat said. She looked at the crude sketch on the table in front of her. “We have re-constructed my genealogy at least a generation beyond Grandmas Jo and Alex, except for my maternal grandfather. It’s a dead end after that. Mom didn't have any records beyond the great-grandparents, so we'll have to start researching other things like census records, church and military records as well as birth, death and marriage certificates, immigration records and social security records." Cat looked up at Billie with a hint of disappointment on her face.
Billie traced her index finger down the side of Cat’s face. “Hey, don’t give up, love. We’ve just started and we have tons of avenues left to explore.”
Cat closed her eyes and savored the feel of Billie's touch. “Hmmm, that feels good."
"So, why the disappointed look on your face?" Billie asked.
"We haven't even scratched the surface yet. It seems like such a huge undertaking. After all that time going through box after box in Mom's attic, we've only managed to go back three generations, and we haven’t even started to research your family yet,” Cat replied.
"We’ll get to that later,” Billie said. “We’ve actually made more progress than you think. In fact, we've got a pretty good start on your genealogy. Sure, we've hit a dead end, but I think in addition to pouring over official records, we really should speak with your grandmothers. They might be able to fill in the gaps. At least some of them," Billie suggested.
"Yeah, I guess you're right. We'll have to find out when they'll be home next. It seems like they’re on the road more than ever lately. I swear they think they're still kids. Mom keeps track of them by phone every week. I'll give her a call later to see if she knows where they are right now," Cat said.
Billie smiled. "All right. In the meantime, why don't we go to the hall of records at the library and see what we can dig up about your great-great-grandparents. Maybe we can start the search on my family at the same time," Billie suggested.
"I'll gather up the kids. Let’s hit the children’s section first to get them something to read while we're poring through the dull stuff," Cat suggested.
* * *
As it turned out, the library was hosting a children's read-a-thon that morning, which the three Charland siblings eagerly joined while their mothers went in search of historical records on their families.
"Wycliffe, Jonathan P, born January, eighteen ninety-seven, Norfolk, Virginia. Died, May nineteen fifty-eight in a cave-in in Brazil while researching ancient cave drawings. Occupation: Professor of History, New York University.”
Cat paused. “Wow, Billie. I didn’t realize Grandma Jo followed in her father’s footsteps.”
She continued to read. “Married to Helen Folstoy, September fourth, nineteen thirty-two. One child, Josephine, born February fifteenth, nineteen thirty-five. Parents, unknown. No military records. Great! This is just great!" Cat exclaimed after reading Jonathan's statistics out loud to Billie.
"What?" Billie asked.
"Parents, unknown," Cat said. "Without Grandma Jo's help, I don't think we'll find anything more on my family here. We'll have to contact the Census Bureau and Social Security Department on line to get any further. We might as well get started researching your family," Cat suggested.
"All right." Billie grabbed a pencil and piece of paper to take notes. "My parents' names were Daniel P. Waterman and Eleanor M. Downey Waterman. They died in the car accident nearly ten years ago, so my dad would have been... let's see, seventy-six today, and my mom would have been seventy-five. So that means, dad was born in nineteen thirty-eight, and mom in nineteen thirty-nine," Billie explained.
"Wow! Your mom and dad were considerably older than normal first time parents when you were born, weren't they?" Cat commented, realizing had they lived, they would be nearly twenty years older than her own parents, and close to her grandmothers' ages.
"Yeah, they were in their forties," Billie replied.
"Wasn't that kind of rough being raised by older parents?" Cat asked.
Billie shrugged as she searched the shelves for the name Waterman.
"Sometimes," she admitted. "Being an only child, I tended to spend more time with adults rather than with other kids."
She looked at Cat and smiled wistfully. "Sometimes we'd go to the park and I'd see these families with a whole herd of kids and wish I was one of them," she confessed. "I guess I act like such a big kid now because that was missing from my childhood."
Cat placed her arms around Billie's waist and smiled into her azure eyes. "Don't ever change. I love it every time you play with the kids. You are just so damned cute when you do."
Billie smiled at Cat's remark. "Well you're pretty damned cute yourself," she replied. "You know, Cat, without any living relatives, it's going to be tough building a family tree."
Cat released Billie's waist and walked toward the card catalog of family names and pulled open the drawer marked W. "You may be right."
Billie continued to search the shelves for a book of records containing names starting with 'W' while Cat thumbed through the index of family names in the archives.
"Billie, do you have any personal papers or family bibles that your parents owned?" Cat asked. "That might be and easier place to start than this. There are a few Watermans in this file, but no Daniel born in the nineteen-thirties. Here's a Daniel Waterman born in nineteen fifty-six, but obviously he's not the one we're looking for," Cat explained as she held up the index card containing the fifty-something Waterman's name.
Billie stopped her own search to answer Cat's question. "Actually, no. When my parents died, I had the gruesome task of cleaning out their house, and interestingly enough, they had very few records at all. I thought it was a little peculiar at the time, but my mom was a neat freak and threw everything away before it had a chance to pile up, so I didn't give it another thought," Billie said.
"Did they leave a will, or a marriage certificate, or even birth certificates... theirs or yours?" Cat asked.
Billie frowned. "Cat, like I said, there was nothing in the house. Nothing except photo albums of me as a child and a few random documents," Billie explained again.
"No records at all? Everyone has records, Billie," Cat replied incredulously.
Impatient with Cat's line of questioning, Billie replied curtly. "Well, my parents weren't everyone, Cat."
Undeterred, Cat continued. "Billie, I find that kind of odd, don't you? I mean, no records at all? Doesn't that make you a little suspicious?" she inquired.
Billie was getting angry. "Just what are you implying, Cat? That my parents had something to hide?"
Cat covered Billie's hand with her own. "Sweetheart, please don't be angry with me. I'm just saying that it's a little odd, and it certainly makes our job harder. We'll just have to start with their death certificates and work backwards, okay?"
Billie slowly shook her head side to side and placed her hands on her hips, erecting a protective shield around her parents' memory. The rational part of her mind knew she shouldn't be angry at Cat's observations but she couldn't help it. For some reason, she felt like she had to defend her parents' actions. In fact, she had been very protective of them all her life. Mostly because they were a lot older than her friends' parents.
Billie's parents told her they had resigned themselves to not having children, however desperately they wanted them. Then she came into their lives. They called her their little miracle. Yes, they were older, but they loved her and protected her in every way possible, lavishing her with all the privileges they could. Their love and attention was the primary reason Billie had stayed married to Brian for so long. She allowed Brian to use her preference for women as blackmail to keep her from leaving him, even though he regularly beat and abused her. She just couldn't let him break her parent's hearts. She was sure knowledge of her lesbian nature would have devastated them.
"Billie. Billie," Cat said, breaking Billie's chain of thought.
"Huh? I'm sorry, Cat. What were you saying?"
"I said we'll have to start with their death certificates and work backwards. Okay?"
"That's a good idea."
Cat looked at her watch. "Damn!" she exclaimed. It's nearly noon. The read-a-thon will be over in a few minutes. Look, why don't I pick the kids up and you can continue the research," Cat suggested.
"No, I think I've had enough for today," Billie said, not really in the mood to continue after the disturbing thoughts about her parents emerged. "Why don't we pick the kids up and treat them to McDonald's for lunch, then go home. I'll dig my parents' photo albums out of the basement and we'll go through them. Maybe we'll find some clues there," Billie said.
* * *
The kids were ecstatic that they were going to McDonald's for lunch. They ate as fast as they could then excused themselves from the table to play in the indoor playground that was attached to the dining room. Cat and Billie ate their lunch at a more leisurely pace.
"Billie, maybe there will be something helpful in that box of albums and old documents that belonged to your parents. Do you think?" Cat asked, pushing a French fry into her mouth.
Billie chased her salad around the plate.
Noticing Billie's lack of enthusiasm and her failure to answer the question, Cat took Billie's hand in hers. "Billie, do you feel all right?" She placed her free hand on Billie's forehead, feeling for fever.
