Succubus Lord 19, page 2
“The sky in Earth Realm was red?” I questioned.
“Well, yeah.” The Sister of Wrath shrugged. “And there was this strange trumpeting sound, followed by a weird sound, like people screaming.”
“You heard people screaming and saw a blood-red sky and didn’t think anything was wrong?” Gula scoffed.
“You have no idea what goes on in my head, Sister,” Ira explained. “I hear the sound of painful screaming twenty-four seven.”
“Holy fuck,” I breathed. “So, he wasn’t just fucking around with us… This is it. This is the big one.”
“Somebody better call up Nicholas Cage,” Todd joked. “Or Arnold. Or John Cusack. Or Jim from The Office. That CIA dick-stroker got ripped for his Saving Private Ryan Amazon show.”
“What the fuck are you talking about, Todd?” I groaned.
“Because it looks like we’re heading into the end of days!” My friend gestured around us.
“Not if I have anything to say about it,” I growled.
“You mean if we have anything to say about it,” Eclipse corrected. “We’re with you until the end, Jacob. Even if that means facing down Lucifer himself.”
“Then we need to get back on Earth as soon as we can,” I explained. “I’ve got my trials in Heaven and Hell already completed, but I still need to atone for all of my ‘wrongs’ on Earth and pass judgement there.”
“Then you can gain access to the Ethereal powers,” Sia reminded me. “The powers that will allow you to kill a god.”
“Where do I even start, though?” I sighed. “I’m not old, but it feels like I’ve done a ton of shit that might need to be atoned for.”
“Maybe you should make a list?” Todd suggested. “Just go full My Name is Earl and start checking ‘em off one-by-one?”
“Not a terrible idea,” I admitted. “But I--”
“King Ralston!” One of my Shades came barging into the room. “An urgent message from the Cult of Ralston!”
“What is it?” I whipped my head around to see the man running full speed.
The Shade stopped right in front of us, doubled over, and sucked in air as he tried to recompose himself. It took him a solid minute, but he finally stood up and cleared his throat harshly.
“Say it, don’t spray it, bro,” Todd gagged.
“They are at your mansion in the city of Phoenix,” the Shade explained. “They need you there urgently.”
“Did they say why?” I questioned. “Because we kinda got some major shit going down right now…”
“John Zeitmann showed up at your house,” the Shade continued. “He was carrying a very important message for you.”
“Can it wait?” I mused. “I know he--”
“It’s from Lucifer,” the Shade elaborated, and I instantly went silent.
Son of a bitch. Even now, in the freaking apocalypse, this fucker was sending me messages through our double-agent. I just hoped our double-agent was still on our side, and that he hadn’t been tainted by Lucifer’s silver tongue.
“Well,” I announced as I looked around at all my friends. “I guess that’s where we’re gonna start. Gather up your things, everyone, because we’re headed back to Earth Realm. And I’m going to need each and every one of you to help me get through this next trial.”
Chapter 2
“Are you sure it’s a good idea for you to hold the fort down here?” I asked Ziminiar as I did one final check of the weapons on my belt. “What happens if shit goes down in the Sixth Circle?”
“It is quite alright,” Ziminiar said as he adjusted the coke-bottle glasses atop his goat-like snout. “You are taking all of your most trusted Demon Lords up to Earth Realm with you, King Ralston. As much as I respect your Shades as warriors, you will need some sort of higher demon in the Fourth Circle while you are gone. If Lucifer or his ever-dwindling number of allies were to try something, they would almost certainly strike here. That’s why I came the second you sent out your message to all of us Demon Kings.”
“And you think you’d be strong enough to take him on?” Eclipse mused as she shined the blade of her naginata.
“Most certainly not.” The King of the Sixth Circle shook his head. “But I’ve known Lucifer longer than any demon other than perhaps Caorthannach, so I know how to get into his head.”
“That’s why I’m stayin, too,” Cao interjected. “This wee goat-man here can’t protect this whole territory alone.”
“You’re not coming along?” I asked the Mother of All Things. “And here I was hoping to get to know you a little better…”
“Jacob,” the Irish brunette laughed. “Ya been all up in ma guts flooding my woman places with your baby syrup, and now we’ve got a little one on the way. I think we know each other real well. Besides, it’s probably not best if I’m up on Earth Realm again. Shit always gets real bad when that happens.”
“I assure you I can protect the Fourth Circle on my own,” Ziminiar protested, but Cao wasn’t having any of it.
“I love ya, Ziminiar,” she chuckled. “But I’ve seen yah struggle with simple grunts before, lad. Ya need a heavy hitter down here in case things go really south.”
“Seriously, Mr. Tumnus,” Todd spoke up. “You’re the Data of this group. Super smart and important to the team, but you’d get your ass kicked by a fucking Tribble. That’s why you need Rock Biter around to act as your Worf.”
“Wasn’t Worf always getting his ass kicked, though?” I reminded the imp.
“That’s because of the ‘Worf Effect,’ bro,” Todd explained. “When you take a badass character and then have them get their ass kicked by a bad guy to show off how strong that bad jabroni really is. Of course, after it happens for the fiftieth time, you start thinking ‘Jesus, this guy’s a pussy.’ So, you can totally blame TNG’s writers for that one.”
“Like Metatron?” Libidine interjected.
“Holy shit!” Todd gasped and clapped his hands against his cheeks in shock. “You’re totally right, Lib! Metatron is our Worf.”
“I thought Caorthannach was supposed to be our team’s ‘Worf?’” Deja scratched her head and frowned in confusion.
“There can be more than two Worfs, Clockblocker,” Todd argued. “We got a heavenly Worf and a hellish Worf.”
“Could one of them be Kruge?” I suggested.
“Jakey…” Todd facepalmed. “Nobody in their right mind wants to be Kruge, bro. Except maybe Raphey. I could totally see him as a Kruge.”
“It’ll be alright, Jacob,” Cao promised. “Ma place is down here in Hell, anyways. You all run along up to Earth Realm and kick me ex’s ass for me, will ya?”
“I’m not gonna let you sit that one out,” I promised the brunette. “I think you’re the one who wants revenge on him the most, and I’m going to make sure you get it.”
Cao’s lips twisted into a devilish smile, and she leaned back against the couch as she laid her arms over the red backing.
“I’m gettin’ euphoric just thinking about it,” she admitted.
“Sooooooo,” Tris’ voice asked, and she sounded like she was still in a baked-out haze. “Can I stay back, too? Totally to help protect the Circle and all that.”
“Tristitia…” Sia scolded her sister. “Is this just an excuse for you to lay on the couch and smoke weed?”
“Noooooooooo.” Tris shook her head, but her glassy violet eyes told a different story.
“Should you even be doing that since you’re pregnant?” I questioned. “I know with human women you definitely aren’t supposed to.”
“Pffffffft.” Todd waved his hand at my suggestion. “My mom told me she did multiple hits a day when she was pregnant with moi, and I think I turned out ah-may-zingggg.”
“I’ll take your word on that one.” Gula covered her mouth to stifle a giggle.
“We are demons, Jacob,” Mirage joked. “More specifically, our children will be Nephilim. If they cannot handle a bit of smoke from a plant when they are in their early stages, then we have a major problem.”
“I’m just checking,” I conceded. “Now, are we ready to go check in on Earth Realm?”
“I guess,” Tris huffed. “I’d much rather hang out with Jacob anyway. No offense, Ziminiar.”
“None taken.” The goat-faced demon shook his head. “I am often an introvert myself.”
“Then let’s get a move on,” I said as I looked around at everyone.
My friends all gave me a nod, so I summoned green Hellfire into my hands and took aim at their figures.
“Let me give you a boost,” Gula offered as she called forth brown flames.
The Sister of Gluttony tossed a blast of her dark fire around my body, and it wrapped me in its warm embrace in an instant. I felt a wave of power surge through my body as the green fire in my hands danced higher and higher, so I blasted the emerald flames around all of my friends and closed my eyes.
I pictured our mansion back in Phoenix, with its massive stucco walls and the adobe ceilings. I envisioned its beautiful backyard, the stainless-steel privacy fence that surrounded the Olympic-sized pool, with grass as green as the fire in my hands.
As I daydreamed about our home, I felt my body become weightless. Soon, the images in my brain grew foggy, and my entire being was transported through space and time.
Finally, I felt the hot, dry heat of the Arizona sun on my flesh, as well as the crunchy grass beneath my boots.
We were home.
Then I opened my eyes, and my heart jumped into my throat.
Gone was the pristine blue sky that made up the traditional landscape, as were the clear rays of sun that normally glistened off our mansion’s windows.
Instead, the sky was a dark, blood red. The clouds were all black, and they floated through the air in a way that reminded me of cereal in a bowl of milk.
Worst of all, however, were the screams.
They were only a distant drone, but they were there.
I was filled with a sense of sheer dread as I listened to the mixture of men, women, and even children screaming in terror of the invisible threat that tormented them. Every now and again, I’d hear the cry of a goat, dog, cat, or bull thrown into the equation, and the whole thing sent chills down my spine.
“That’s going to get annoying real fast,” Inpulsa huffed and crossed her arms across her latex-covered chest.
“At least it is just a soft drone,” Liby admitted. “I feared it was going to be eardrum-shattering.”
“Now you see why I thought it was all in my head!” Ira protested. “It sounds like it’s far away, almost like the thoughts you have or even tinnitus.”
“If your tinnitus sounds like that,” I chuckled, “I think you’ve got bigger problems.”
“My question is… Are those the screams of real people?” Ariel asked as her hands tightened into fists. “Because if so, we need to help them.”
“I doubt it.” Superbia shook her head. “Unless there is a… very peculiar farm around here, there would not be such a mixture of animals.”
“You don’t know that, Strawberry Shortcake,” Todd interjected. “Maybe since the end of the world started, everyone’s gone all feral and Road Warrior out here.”
“I doubt it,” I said as I pointed to the mansion. “There’s no way our house would still be in one piece if society had broken down. Hell, knowing how people are nowadays, I bet a lot of them haven’t even noticed the world is starting to end.”
“What about the red sky?” Cupi questioned. “And the screaming?”
“Probably just blaming it on some weather anomaly.” I shrugged. “Let’s get inside and see what John Zeitmann has to tell us. And maybe while we’re in there we can flip on the news and see if anybody on Earth Realm knows what the fuck is happening.”
I headed toward the large wooden door of our mansion, and as I passed by the driveway, I took a long, loving glance at our Jeep Wrangler, Shadow. I thought about all the adventures we’d gone on with our beloved car, and how if Lucifer had his way, this might be the very last time we saw the ‘ol girl. I let out a deep sigh as nostalgia washed over me like a cozy blanket, but then I quickly snapped out of it and continued to the door.
I grabbed onto the handle, twisted it softly, and then pushed the door open with a loud creak. Once inside, we were greeted by the beautiful black-and-white tile floors and the set of marble staircases that led up to the second story, and off in the distance, I could hear the chattering of voices from our living room and kitchen area.
My friends and I made our way toward the voices, and when I stepped through the threshold of the living room, I couldn’t help but smile intensely.
Oliver, one of the co-leaders of the Cult of Ralston, sat in our designer wing-style chair with one leg crossed over the other. His navy robe hung loosely from his body as he held his hands together against his knee, and his hood was pulled back to reveal every single wrinkle on his aging face. His white, wiry hair sat wildly atop his head, and I noticed it seemed to be even thinner than normal.
Meanwhile, Jane, our other cult leader, rested on the leather couch across from the TV. The beautiful brunette woman wore a massive smile on her delicious lips and a form-fitting navy robe on her voluptuous body. Her baby-blue eyes were radiant in the soft light from above, and it was enough to melt even the coldest of hearts.
My cock throbbed in my pants as I observed how Jane’s navy garment hugged her giant breasts tightly, and I silently reminisced about all the times we’d made love.
Next to Jane sat Isabella, the BPI Agent who’d been assigned to my case. She sat all prim and proper, with perfect posture and dirty-blonde hair that only came down to about her cheekbones. In typical fashion, the government agent wore a light-tan pantsuit, complete with matching suspenders.
Then there was the tall, middle-aged man with graying black hair who sat alone on the second chair, our gray recliner. He had his hands in his lap as he sat forward and stared out the window at the crimson sky, and all the while, his thumbs twiddled in circles around each other nervously.
That was definitely John Zeitmann.
The last person we saw in the room made me grin like an idiot. There she was, a tall, fit woman with long blonde hair, tiger-striped spandex across her lower body, and a matching white jacket that just barely covered her breasts. Of course, that was just the look she chose for right now.
It was the shapeshifting assassin, Aruna.
“Jacob Ralston!” a booming, happy voice proclaimed from the shadows of the kitchen. “I have never been happier to see you in my life.”
Out from the corner of the kitchen stepped the Archangel Raphael, clad in his flowing white robe. His long black hair was tied up in his signature man-bun, and his blue eyes glistened with joy as he approached.
“Woooooowwww,” Todd grumbled. “After everything we’ve been through, bro, and you’re all hot and bothered about Jakey?”
“Do-- do you want me to be hot and bothered about you instead?” Raphael questioned as he furrowed his eyebrows and cocked his head to the side.
“What?” Todd gagged. “No! No soy homosexual, Raphey. Remember?”
“Well, you just said you were jealous I was getting ‘hot and bothered’ to see Jacob, but not you,” Raph continued.
“I’m only bustin’ your balls, bro,” Todd sighed.
“Now see? That sounds very ‘homo,’” the Archangel argued. “I’m afraid you’re beginning to confuse me, Todd.”
“I’m fucking with you,” the imp tried again.
“That also sounds homosexual,” Raph mused. “Are you trying to tell us something, Todd?”
“Noooooo,” Todd huffed. “I’m just saying I said that to chap your ass.”
“That sounds worst of all!” Raph put his hand over his mouth and gasped.
“Fucking hell…” The little red imp facepalmed. “Let me put this in second-grade speak here. I’m just pulling your--”
“I don’t know how that sentence ends,” the Archangel interrupted. “But it certainly doesn’t sound appropriate for second graders.”
“This is hopeless,” Todd sighed and shook his head.
“I’m glad to see you, too, Raph,” I cut in. “And I’m happy to see each and every one of you in this room. Well… Maybe not John here, but that’s totally not his fault.”
“I get it,” Mr. Zeitmann chuckled nervously. “Every time you guys talk to me, you almost get killed by some evil demon.”
“That’s just another Wednesday for us, John,” I reassured the paranormal expert. “If we didn’t have demons trying to kill us all the time, I’d think we were doing a shitty job.”
“Or an assassin,” Aruna noted. “I swear for a while there, a different member of the Assassin’s Association was sent after you every week.”
“Seriously,” Todd grumbled. “Do you have any idea how much damage your butt-buddies caused to the Todd Tower, Tigra?”
“You always rebuilt it.” Aruna winked. “Ten times better than before.”
“I’m afraid this time is much different,” Oliver interjected. “This time, the demon who’s trying to kill us is Lucifer himself.”
“Is that it?” I asked John. “Is that the message he wanted you to tell us?”
“Kind of.” John shrugged his shoulders. “You know how I was playing double-agent for you guys? Well, I think he might have figured it out…”
Son of a bitch. My dad was smarter than he looked.
“He sent a letter, apparently,” Jane added.
“I got a letter in the mail just this morning,” John Zeitmann explained. “From my good friend ‘Lou C. Fierre.’ It basically said now that I had spread his message all around the world, the ‘fun’ could begin. Then he said I was of no more use to him, and I should come and find you if I wanted any chance at surviving through the day. It freaked me out, King Ralston.”
“Bro…” Todd giggled to himself. “Lucy wrote Johnny boy here a literal ‘Dear John’ letter.”
“That was it?” I prompted further. “He didn’t say what he wanted to do with this whole apocalypse thing? I thought you said he had a message for me?”
“He did,” John noted. “In the ‘P.S.’ section of the letter. He said he wanted me to tell you the charade was over. This was really going to be the end for you and all of your friends, and the end of everything you held dear. Also, he didn’t know what you were up to but, and I quote, ‘you have less of chance of passing the trials than I do of pissing solid gold.’”
