Witches Be Crazy, page 29
He gritted his teeth and charged the beast. Still distracted by Gilly, Rainchild didn’t know he was coming until he felt the full force of the blacksmith slamming into his ribcage. In spite of the size difference, the lunging tackle struck with enough force that both man and monster were sent tumbling down another nearby hill. Quickly rolling to his feet, Dungar paused for a moment to glance back to his friends.
“RUN!!!!” He roared before returning his sights to the wizard.
As the sound of racing footsteps rustling the bushes faded away, Dungar hopped onto the downed body of his enemy before he could get up and proceeded to relentlessly pound away at his head. His fists, gloved or not, seemed to have little effect on the giant creature. Each blow caused its recipient to recoil slightly, but he only got five or six hits in before Rainchild swatted him off and hopped to his feet.
His attacker appeared to be the least of the wizard’s worries as he wildly scanned around looking for Koey. Within moments, the blacksmith was on him again repeatedly dishing a futile assault. Offensively ineffective as it was, the persistent onslaught was sufficient at drawing the beast’s attention. Dungar resorted to every underhanded tactic he could think of. He stomped Rainchild’s enormous feet, he gouged at the man’s eyes, he kicked him in the groin several times.
“ENOUGH!” The monster roared, covering his small aggressor with a huge gob of slobber.
Balancing on his giant knuckles, he swung forward and drove his feet into Dungar’s chest hard enough to send him into a series of backflips. He then wasted no more time before beginning his pursuit of the women, leaving Dungar behind in a crumpled heap.
Struggling to catch his breath, the wounded warrior slowly got to an upright seated position. He silently cursed himself for a few moments for not being able to distract Rainchild for longer. Rose and Koey were not fast runners, particularly not in Koey’s dress, and Gilly would never leave them behind. Unless they found a place to hide, they would never outrun their pursuer.
With a deep breath and a grunt, Dungar was back on his feet and lumbering behind them. He couldn’t see where anyone had gone as the forest area around the meadow grew dense quickly. Drained but driven, he slogged through the thick underbrush slowly picking up pace. He paid no mind to the fact he had no idea where he was or where he was going, he didn’t even realize how hopelessly lost in a foreign land he was, his mind was completely focused on his wooded surroundings and those who dwelled within.
He looked around wildly as he ran, scanning for any signs of movement or tracks or any indication whatsoever of recent passersby. Eventually an external sound entered his ear, the sound of snapping twigs and breaking branches. Something large was tearing through these woods near his position, and he hoped it was Rainchild because the last thing he felt he needed to do was pick a fight with another large woodland creature.
The shapeshifted wizard galloped through the woods on all fours in pursuit of his prey. His flattened snout snuffled at the air as he continued to zero in. He began to slow down and paw at nearby bushes as if he knew the women to be near. Concealed beneath the long and flat rock he currently stood on was a small cave. The entrance was just wide enough that three young women were able to crawl inside one at a time in attempt to outwit their hunter.
At the sound of large feet thudding overheard, three hands clasped over three mouths and terrified expressions were shared. Suddenly a colossal hand reached through the opening, frantically swiping at the air.
“Hello, girls.”
The low breathy rumble filled their small crawlspace as a one of the large coal black eyes peered in at them.
“Room for one more?”
He retracted his arm and grasped the boulder with both hands as he tried to lift it off of them. Slowly light began to peek inside as the rock was slowly pulled free from the binds of nature.
“Rosie, listen to me!” Gilly spoke urgently as dust trickled onto her face from above. She grasped her hyperventilating sister by the shoulder to assure her attention. “As soon as the way is clear, I need you to take the queen and run. Do not look back, just get her far away from here.”
“No … No, I can’t!”
“Yes you can! There is no other option.”
“Gilly, I can’t do this! I’m not brave like you and Dungar. I wish I was fearless like you. I wish I wasn’t scared. I wish I could beat up bad guys. But I’m not! And I can’t …”
“You know I’d never leave you unless I absolutely had to!”
Gilly glanced over her shoulder worriedly as Rainchild’s figure became slowly more visible. Turning back to her sister, she could now see her fearful face in the dim light. “What do you think being brave is, Rose? If one is not scared then one is not brave, for fear is a necessity to courage.”
The sound of snapping roots and displaced ground cut off any part of her speech that may have remained. Their cozy cave had been reduced to a simple indent in the landscape as the wizard finally hoisted the rock away, bathing them all in sunlight.
“I believe in you, Rosie! Go now!”
Grabbing two handfuls of dirt from the ground, Gilly charged towards the monster, jumped as high as she could, and plunged the small piles of the damp soil into his eyes. Immediately he recoiled, thrashing around wildly while furiously trying to rub at his eyes. After a quick scan of her surroundings revealed all she had at her disposal were rocks, she grabbed the largest one she could wield one handed and began clubbing Rainchild in the mouth with it, attempting to knock his teeth out once again.
Bits of pulverized oral flesh were leaking from his mouth by the time the monster regained his eyesight. Enraged, he grabbed Gilly by her swinging arm and lifted her off the ground by it. Using his free hand, he grasped her by the shoulder and began to pull her arm clean off. Before he could do so, a grass stained, dirt encrusted, and incredibly pissed off bearded blacksmith leapt down from the top of a nearby rock face, grabbed Rainchild’s monster form’s mane of fur, and used his own body weight to pull the wizard off his feet and to the ground.
A loud thud rang out through the forest as Gilly landed on Rainchild who, in turn, landed on Dungar, knocking the wind out of him once more. Immobilized and gasping for air, Dungar saw only one viable course of action. He wrapped his hairy, steely arms around the beast’s neck as he had done for many of his patrons before. However, this time he squeezed for all he was worth.
Rainchild began to thrash around, mouth wide open gasping for air while his dirty thick, pipe-like fingers furiously clawed at his choker’s arms. With narrowed eyes, Gilly got to her knees while still the wizard’s chest and shoved her arm into Rainchild’s now toothless mouth then retracted it quickly, his freshly ripped off uvula squished in her fist.
The ensuing roar of pain echoed through the forest, reverberating off of trees and frightening flocks of birds. The pain of the injury caused the wizard to contort so violently that he managed to break the blacksmith’s grip.
“Dayum, that was loud!”
“It came from over there!”
Dungar and Gilly looked off into the woods towards the voices while Rainchild reverted back to his human form, a look of relief spreading over his face as the pain in his throat vanished. Three armor clad men emerged hurriedly from the trees to investigate the scene of the scuffle
“What’s goin on here?!” One of them demanded. “What are you lot doing to that man?!”
“This man is a murderer and a sorcerer—” Gilly began
“KNIGHTS!” Rainchild cut her off as he threw his arms up. “Thank Suola you’re here! I finally had the Queen but then these two thugs attacked me!”
“How dare you mention Suola, you vile—”
“Unhand that man immediately!” The knight commanded, drawing his steel.
Begrudgingly, Gilly and Dungar raised their hands submissively and inched away from Rainchild, who quickly hopped to his feet and dusted himself off.
“Thank you, sir knight! I don’t know what I would have done if—”
“Where is the queen?!” A different knight demanded. “Is she far?”
“Not at all! Just keep these two away from me and we will track them down!”
Held at sword point and forced to follow the man who was at his mercy mere moments before, Dungar glanced over to Gilly who appeared to share his attitude towards the situation. Unarmed and outnumbered, obeying commands and quietly hoping they don’t find Rose or Koey seemed to be the best course of action for the time being.
Something about the situation felt rather peculiar. The three men certainly appeared to be guards from the castle, likely searching the forest to see if Rainchild succeeded. However, while two of them possessed the diamond swords symbolizing the wizard’s corruption, the third carried a regular sword of folded steel. Naturally that could mean a number of things, or indeed nothing at all, but it was odd to Dungar nonetheless.
Things were tense as they made their way through the forest. The four other men were intently scanning their surroundings and jumping at any seemingly foreign sound. He considered making a run for it a few times, but he wasn’t sure it was a good idea to test shady law enforcers on their reflexes. Consequently he bit his tongue and bided his time until a sound was heard that made his heart sink and regret his decision.
“There they are!”
Sure enough, down at the foot of a small bank were the two young ladies in tattered clothing hoofing it through the thick underbrush as best they could. Abandoning chaperoning the prisoners, the three knights sheathed their weapons and took off after the girls. Not content to wait and see what would happen, Dungar and Gilly chased the chasers.
The pressure of pursuit was not handled well by Rose who stumbled almost immediately upon feeling it. Koey stopped to help her to her feet, but the damage was done. In an instant the guards were upon them and their retreat terminated. The girls became separated and all weapons were immediately drawn. Rainchild slowed to a walk as he composed himself to gloat once again.
“My my, dear Queen, you gave us quite a scare there. However, now that all that business is over, it is going to be my distinct pleasure to—”
“HOLD IT RIGHT THERE!”
All heads turned to the knight with the steel sword who had drawn his weapon and held it to Rose’s throat from behind.
“ROSIE!” Gilly screamed, taking a step forward.
“You best hold your pretty little self right there, missy!” The guard grunted warningly. “Or I’ma slice this damsel here worse’n a grouchhawk guts a codfish.”
Dungar stared at the knight wide-eyed.
“Now you lot here listen up and you listen yerselves good!” He continued. “Yer gonna surrender that there queen into my charge whereupon I will commence the bringing of justice down upon her!”
Rainchild stared at him incredulously, mouth twisted into an expression of thorough confusion.
“Who is this guy!?” He demanded of the other knights.
With his free hand, the knight removed his helmet and tossed it to the ground.
“I am Sir Lee, the only remaining true knight of this here glorious kingdom and all her freedoms! And I am here to honorably execute lady whatever-the-tit-her-real-name-is for the crimes of murder, treason, and impersonating a royal official!”
“YOU IDIOT!” Rainchild loudly berated him. “WE’RE here to kill the queen!” He added, gesturing to himself and the other two guards.
Lee’s eyes went wide and he lowered his sword. “Well shoot! If I knew we were all here to kill the queen then that woulda saved me one whole of a lotta trouble reenlisting in the town guard and whatnot.”
“Only WE are here to carry out an execution.” Rainchild corrected him, once again gesturing to himself and the guards. He then gestured to Dungar and Gilly. “THEY are the ones who would have our efforts thwarted.”
“Naw naw, you got it all wrong, son! That there bearded feller is Doonger. He saved my bacon a few sun-ups past. He’s got it in fer the queen too. We’re all on the same team!”
“Well if it weren’t for mister ‘Doonger,’ as he is referred, the queen would be dead already and we could all be carrying on with our lives.”
“Aw well, it’s fer the best anyhow! I wanted to be the one to do it anyway.”
“Well that is absolutely out of the question, you drawling inbred. The people promised to elect me monarch once I ridded them of their evil overlord, as I convinced them only I could.”
“Now YOU listen to ME, you fancy talkin’ flower fondler! I don’t care what kinda deal you made with what kinda people. I’ll be the one taking that lady’s head and I’ll be doing with it whatever I see fit!” He then grabbed a fistful of Rose’s hair and pulled her towards him. “Even if I gotta resort to giving some undeserved treatment to some undeserving people to get my way!”
As Rainchild opened his mouth to rebut, Gilly reached over and stole one of the other guard’s diamond swords right from its scabbard then sliced off the hand that held Rose’s hair at the wrist so fast that Lee didn’t even have time to react. Her precision was perfect as the hand fell to the ground without a single hair being severed. She then pulled her sister to her side as Lee fell to his knees gaping at the bloody stump at the end of his arm.
“My wise and faithful watcher above.” Gilly quietly recited to herself as she closed her eyes and held her free hand to her chest. “I pray forgiveness for I have broken my seventh vow by harming one who had not caused harm unto me or my faith.”
“DANGIT, YOU GUTLESS WENCH!” Lee screamed into the forest as he raised his sword once more. “Yer gonna pay for that!”
Paying him no mind, Gilly’s eyes remained closed and her oration continued.
“I pray you can understand my actions of harm were perpetrated only with the intent of preventing greater harm.”
The disarmed knight drew a long, thin knife from his ankle scabbard while his partner unsheathed his own diamond armament. Rage in his eyes, Lee took another step closer to Gilly, brandishing his sword menacingly.
“ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME, GIRL?!”
“Furthermore, I pray that you take mercy upon the three souls that will soon be joining you in your garden of stars.”
Paying no attention to her words, Lee lunged forward with a wild swing of his sword. Eyes suddenly open wide, Gilly gave Rose a harsh shove that knocked her to the ground before agilely rolling under Lee’s swipe. Now in front of the two guards, she transitioned directly from her roll to a spinning leap into the air during which she roundhouse kicked the sword guard in the face with her metal greaves.
Her combat style was elegant and flowing like a dance. She drifted around her opponents with ease as if not encumbered by her heavy armor at all. Even though he watched the entire thing happen, Dungar was unable to pinpoint the exact moment wherein the sword wounds from which the deceased guards now bled were inflicted. By the time Sir Lee had spun around from his wild swing, he was the only armed man left standing.
Gilly stood before him, eyes closed once more. Her feet were placed together in a strange T shape and although she did not look towards her opponent, her sword was aimed directly at him. With a guttural cry of barbarism, the doomed knight raised his sword again. The moment he did so, Gilly’s eyes opened and she began to spin once more. On her first rotation, her swinging sword severed the man’s remaining hand in the exact same spot as the first one. It was on her second spin that she lopped the man’s head clean from his shoulders.
Rose and Koey were mortified at the carnage that now surrounded them, leaving them unable to so much as gasp. Even Dungar found himself looking back and forth between Gilly and her handiwork wide-eyed. Before long, however, both fighters had turned their attention back to Rainchild, who was inspecting the bloodshed with a pronounced lower lip. Seeing the eyes of hatred upon him, he simply shrugged.
“Oh, is this where I’m supposed to cower in fear?” He threw up his hands and contorted his face into a faux look of terror. “You two don’t scare me!”
Dungar and Gilly shared a confused look briefly before they began towards the wizard.
“Allow me to amend that statement!” Rainchild added quickly, causing a pause in their advance. He pointed to a particularly tall tree nearby that, at some point during the commotion, had been turned into a solid diamond pillar that caught the setting sun’s light and brilliantly shone like a beacon, lighting up the forest around them and even the sky itself. Smug smile on his face, he continued. “What I meant to say was: you two wouldn’t scare me … even if I didn’t just alert the entire Jenair military to my current position. In fact either that’s a funny looking cloud or that’s them on the horizon right now!”
Sure enough, at the crest of the hill the sun was currently setting behind, was the unmistakable silhouette of an amassing army. Teeth clenched into a grimace, Gilly turned and faced them stoically with her sword, momentarily unaware that Rainchild had reached over and turned it into cheese while she was distracted.
“You know, I totally could have killed you both right there.” The wizard chuckled as he leaned against his diamond tree. “But I’d rather sit and watch how this unfolds. How is it the kids say it these days? Oh right. ‘Dis gon b gud!’”
TWENTY-SIX
No Fear Cavalier
Every knight in the kingdom had to be on that ridge. With a missing ruler and zero law enforcement, Dungar figured the city itself was likely in a state of anarchy by this point. Though it was still probably more peaceful than it was when the guards were there.
The sinking sun stretched the soldiers’ shadows spookily down the slope. Their diamond blades glowed ethereally as they reflected the bright star’s light. To the sound of a distant drum beat, they all began to march in step down the horizon. As soon as the infantry began their approach, Rose rushed over to the body of Sir Lee and retrieved his steel sword.
“Here!” She called to Gilly, taking the dairy blade from her and handing over the real weapon.
Rainchild snorted loudly behind them during the exchange. “Oh you think that will help you, girl? Diamond is the hardest material in the world. Simple folded steel will be no match.”
