Lakeside Cougars - The Complete Trilogy, page 67
“You did tell me that,” he agreed. “Okay, I’ll take you at your word. I just, I guess I’m kind of overprotective once I get...involved, with a woman.”
“And that is an appreciated facet, Atticus. But it is also a potentially damaging one. You must take care to keep it in check.”
“Yeah, you’re right. I know how irritating it is when someone’s asking you if you’re mad about something, but you aren’t, but they think you’re hiding it so they keep asking, but you really aren’t, but now you’re getting mad because they won’t quit asking.”
“Exactly. It’s a question of insecurity, and you have nothing to be insecure about. I will let you know if I’m experiencing difficulty, or if you’ve upset me.”
“All right, and you’re sure you don’t want me to drive you to your actual house?” he asked as they pulled up to the Ranger’s Station.
“I’m sure. I want to walk back, clear my head, give me time to ruminate over this. I’m more or less certain I want to pursue a romantic relationship with you, but I need time to be completely sure on that. Will you be comfortable with it if I do not contact you for the next several days?”
“Yes, I will. Actually, that will be perfect, because I have to pack a lot of time-spending with the ladies in my life into the next four or five days.”
“Perfect.” Now she looked over at him directly from the passenger’s seat as they parked. “Thank you for today, Atticus. It was the best day in recent memory. The sex was phenomenal and the emotional connection and conversation were as well. And the next time we see each other, I would very much like rough anal sex from you.”
“I would very much like to give it to you,” he replied.
She smiled, then gave him a firm kiss on the mouth. “Farewell for now.”
“Farewell for now,” he murmured as she slipped out of his car and began disappearing up the trail that would take her home.
He watched her go, his eyes fixed on her fit, firm ass showcased so nicely in those shorts, then he started driving back home.
…
“Okay, what exactly is this all about?” Kate asked as everyone settled.
He’d called for a meeting almost as soon as he’d returned.
“I feel a little bad about disappearing for a few days and I know we’ve talked about it already, but it’s prompted me to want to do a series of date days with each of you. Mostly I want to celebrate our new relationship and I want to make you feel as good as you make me feel.”
“That sounds lovely,” Edith replied immediately.
“Yeah, I’m down for a date day,” Kate said.
“So am I,” Susan agreed.
“Who goes first?” Edith asked.
“You do,” he replied. “And just so it doesn’t get complicated, I picked the order mostly at random.” It wasn’t exactly a lie, but everyone seemed, if not to buy it, then be comfortable with it.
“Well...okay then,” Edith replied. “When?”
“Tomorrow.”
“Oh! What will we be doing?”
“I have an idea or two I want to surprise you with, all of you, but I also want you thinking about things you want to do with me. Edith is tomorrow, Susan is the day after that, Kate the day after that, and Colleen after that.”
“What about Vetra?” Susan asked.
“Whenever she’s feeling social again, we’ll have another day together after I’ve had my days with you all. Now, as for today…” He paused, then yawned. “Oh, come on! It’s not even six o’clock!” he groaned.
They all laughed.
“You’ve been busy fucking us and hiking all day,” Colleen said.
“Yeah, you pervert,” Kate agreed.
“Yeah, I’m the fucking pervert.”
“How about,” Colleen said, adopting her negotiating voice, “since Atticus has so much ahead of him for the next stretch of time, we spend the rest of the day relaxing? I wouldn’t mind getting a little baked and watching one of the dozens of movies on our to-watch list.”
There was a general murmur of agreement.
“Yeah, I’ve got nothing to do for the rest of the day for once,” Kate said.
“You’re becoming such a hedonist,” Edith said.
“Yes, I am,” Colleen agreed merrily, “and you’re welcome for helping you along.”
“What are we eating?” Atticus asked.
“I went shopping today and got all the ingredients for two homemade big-ass pizzas, so Edith and I will get started on that,” Colleen replied, standing up.
“Oh, thanks for voluntelling me,” Edith replied, getting to her feet as well.
“You know you can’t stand it when anyone else makes pizzas, they have to be just right.”
“You use too much sauce!” Edith complained as she followed Colleen into the kitchen.
Atticus laughed and got up. “I’ll go get the weed ready.”
It was definitely going to be one of those nights.
…
“Oh wow, what’s this?” Edith murmured sleepily as she emerged from their bedroom.
“Breakfast,” Atticus replied, flipping over the bacon. “It’s not ready yet, though.”
“You made me breakfast?”
“Yeah. It’s the beginning of our date day.”
When she didn’t respond he turned and looked at her. She stood in the doorway to the kitchen, naked, regarding him with a somewhat bewildered expression.
“...you all right?”
“Yeah,” she murmured, then yawned. “Um, I guess I’ll brush my teeth and get dressed.”
“Sounds good, I should be done by then.”
She stared at him a moment longer, then nodded and headed back into the bedroom. Atticus frowned slightly as he turned back to the stovetop. That wasn’t quite the reaction he’d been hoping for, but he had, for once, woken up before her. Before anyone, actually. All three of the lovely women he shared this house with had still been asleep when his phone had begun buzzing under his pillow. It was the best way he could think to wake up without waking them and it had worked.
But, he supposed, this might be weird for Edith.
It seemed she’d gone years, decades, perhaps her whole life without being with someone who did things like this for her.
He gripped the pan more tightly, feeling the stirrings of rage somewhere deep.
It seemed that every single woman he was dating now had endured varying levels of neglect, misery, and outright abuse. And while he was reluctant to say that someone deserved to experience it, he sure as hell knew that none of them deserved what had happened to them at all.
Each one of them was a good person, a fine woman.
It was occurring to him that while he had settled on the notion that his life’s purpose was to make video games, this was no longer true. Making video games was what he did for himself, his own pursuit, but his true life’s purpose was to be there for these women. To help them, care for them, make them feel good.
The bacon had reached its proper crispiness. He knew Edith liked it like him: almost blackened. He finished up and tossed the bacon on the plates. It was a simple breakfast of bacon, over-easy eggs, and hashbrowns, but he knew she would appreciate it. He finished prepping everything as Edith reemerged from their bedroom in a robe.
“Is this, uh, appropriate? For date breakfast?” she asked, more awake now.
He chuckled. “Yes, dear. Come on. I thought we could eat out back.”
“That would be wonderful.”
She got the door for him as he carried out their plates to the table on the back porch. As she got settled, he ran back inside and poured two glasses of milk, then joined her.
“This is really nice,” she said after a few bites. “Um, thank you.”
“You’re welcome, Edith.”
She took a drink, then rubbed at her eyes, looking down at the plate. “Shit, I’m sorry I’m acting weird. This is just kind of...throwing me off. It’s good!” she added quickly. “This is good, I’m happy, to be clear. Just...emotionally, um...I mean, I never really had anything like this.”
“I’m sorry. I kind of figured.”
Edith stared at him for a moment, her expression uncertain and difficult to read, almost like she was trying to figure something out. Then she smiled with something like relief, then took a moment to compose herself.
“This is good,” she said, reaching out.
He reached out too and met her halfway, their hands touching in the middle of the table. “This is good,” he agreed. “You deserve this.”
Her smile slipped a notch. “I hope so.”
“Edith,” he said, a little more firmly, “you deserve this. You deserve to be happy.”
“I guess I’ll have to take your word for it.”
He leaned in and kissed the back of her hand, then they went back to eating. Conversation was light as they ate breakfast. Atticus had to sit on his anxiety that he’d fucked something up. He knew Edith was emotionally complex, even to herself.
Perhaps especially to herself.
He thought that she was still sorting the storm of emotions that had apparently hit her, but he also had the faint inkling that she had locked onto something specific. A decision, maybe, or perhaps a realization.
What could that be?
But he put that aside, too. Maybe it was just his anxiety, or if it wasn’t, he would find out when she was ready to tell him, if he wasn’t imagining it.
They finished up and brought the dishes back inside.
“Now what?” Edith asked as he began rinsing them off.
“How about you go get dressed and we have a nice walk along the lake, then we hit up your house for a few games of badminton? Then we can do something you want after that?”
The way her face lit up at that was a joy all its own. “All right! That sounds great.”
She laughed, gave him a quick kiss on the cheek, then hurried off to the bedroom. He watched her go, then slowly turned back to the sink and resumed putting the dishes into the washer.
Oh yeah, he was definitely in love with her.
CHAPTER TEN
“I never really do stuff like this anymore,” Edith said as they began making leisurely progress along the lake’s edge.
The day was still young, just past eight in the morning, and a soft gray cloud cover provided a pleasant shade and a cool breeze that turned what would otherwise be a blazing summer’s day into something much more satisfying.
He’d checked the forecast and it seemed the weather was on his side for this week of date days.
“Any particular reason?” he asked.
She sighed. “I guess it’s because I never really broke free of the ‘I have to keep doing fucking everything’ mindset. Idle time felt like wasted time.” She frowned. “Still does.”
“I know it’s not the best topic for a date day, but...have you given any more thought to therapy or medication?”
She tensed, her frown deepening a little, but she didn’t balk. “Yes, I have. And I’ve decided...that you and Colleen are right. I’m tired of being like this. Of feeling like this. I just hate it. It’s like there’s this alarm going off in my head most days. Like I’ve forgotten something terribly important or almost like I’m...guilty? Like I’m going to get caught slacking off. And I mean I know why I feel this way now. Talking with you and Colleen about this stuff, it seems obvious now that it’s my parents and my husband, years of pressuring me to be perfect and active all the time…”
“Sorry, I shouldn’t have brought it up.”
“No,” she said firmly, taking his hand and lacing their fingers together. “No, you should have. It’s good that you did. I’ve been meaning to talk with you about it anyway. I don’t want to deal with it, but I need to. And I’ll...need your help.”
“Anything I can do, I will.”
She smiled and stopped suddenly. He stopped with her, turning to face her. She wrapped him in a hug and squeezed tightly. He hugged back, holding her, waiting for her to speak.
“Thank you,” she said after a long pause. “I can’t tell you what a goddamned relief it is to hear this coming from you. My relationship with...relationships is so fucked up. I’m so goddamned neurotic and I hate it and I know I need to fix it, I just don’t know how and it’s so scary. But it’s so much less scary to have you here just...supporting me.”
“I’ll be here for you, Edith,” he murmured, running his hands up and down her back, feeling the soft fabric of her summer dress.
“Forever?” she asked, her voice barely a whisper.
“Forever,” he replied.
She let out a slightly choked laugh. “You sure about that?”
“I’m sure about that, Edith.”
She sniffed, then gave him one final squeeze and released him. “Shit, sorry,” she muttered, wiping at her eyes.
“It’s fine, honey.” He offered her a tissue.
She laughed again, a more plainly joyful expression coming onto her face. She dabbed at her eyes, then blew her nose. “You are so much sweeter than anyone else I’ve dated,” she muttered as he accepted the tissue and slipped it back into his pocket.
“Apparently. I’m just glad I can be.”
“Saying ‘so am I’ seems like such an understatement.”
They resumed walking, lacing their fingers together again. For a time, they just strolled slowly through the grass, taking in the sights and sounds of early morning Lakeside. It was quiet, peaceful, only the very distant hum of the highway and the occasional chirping of birds and buzzing of instincts breaking the silence.
They walked until they reached Colleen’s bench. Here they sat together, looking out over the still waters.
“What’s it like, dating two rich cougars?” she asked.
“Um...not like how I expected,” he replied.
She laughed. “How so?”
“To be honest...I expected I’d have to put up with more bullshit. Especially as someone from a broke background. I thought you and Colleen would be more disconnected from reality. Or maybe more, you know…”
“What?” she prodded.
“Karen?”
She laughed loudly, startling some nearby birds that had landed to prospect along the water’s edge. “I suppose that’s a very fair fear. I ran with enough of them in my time. There’s a lot more of them in the bigger cities. I suppose I probably was one often enough when I was still married. Colleen...could be like that, sometimes.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah, although with her, I don’t know, it wasn’t really...it was closer to standing up for herself and for me and other girls. She could really get in guys’ faces when they were being shitheads. But sometimes she’d just be in a mood and get pissy with people who didn’t really deserve it.” She frowned. “I shouldn’t be talking bad about her, it was a long time ago.”
“Not a bad instinct,” he agreed, “but revisiting the past isn’t all bad. It’s good to measure how far you’ve come, how far your friends have come...that being said, how are you doing? Like, in a broader sense now that you’ve moved in and gotten settled?”
“I’m...better,” she said after considering it a moment. “I think it still feels weird. Like, not completely real? When I go to sleep in bed with you and Colleen, and now Susan, it feels like something closer to an adult slumber party than real life. And part of me is curious to see how it’s going to feel when I really accept that this is my new normal, but part of me also doesn’t want it to stop feeling like a slumber party, if that makes sense.”
“That definitely makes sense. I feel the same way.”
She laughed. “Yeah, I bet. I’m also kind of feeling just happy all the time? But also nervous. Like some bad thing is going to happen that’s going to take it all away and I just can’t see it. But I also know I’m probably just being paranoid.”
“You’re being paranoid...but I get it. I’m feeling exactly the same thing.”
“That’s another thing I love about you, you get it, my anxiety. Colleen never did. I mean, she could understand some of it on an intellectual level, but not emotionally.”
“Yep,” he agreed immediately. “Someone who doesn’t have anxiety issues just doesn’t understand. Which is a double-edged sword. You don’t want them to have to understand, but sometimes you do, because anxiety is isolating.”
“Yes. It’s so fucking isolating. Just being alone with these fears all the time...I wanted to thank you for listening to me, and for trying to help me in ways that anticipate my anxiety instead of trying to ignore it. It feels, shit, I don’t know, it feels...amazing, I guess. I don’t really know how to say it.”
“Validating,” he replied, “like you’re not crazy.”
“Yes, exactly.” She pressed herself against him and he put his arm around her. “I cannot believe I would find the most amazing man at goddamned forty six. Or that I’d be sharing him with my best friends. And a couple other girls. And that he’d be half my age.”
“And I never thought I’d find such amazing women who actually got me and were cool sharing me and were twice my age and so fucking insanely hot.”
She laughed. “I’m very glad you feel that way. I’d kind of hit the point where I figured my looks would be, you know, tolerated in any relationship I got into.”
“Yeah, no toleration here. Just pure lust,” he murmured, putting a hand on her thigh.
She gasped and jumped a little when he slipped it into her dress. “Bad boy!” she hissed, grabbing his hand and smiling broadly.
“You like that,” he murmured.
“I do, you little pervert,” she whispered, looking around, “but...we need to wait. I have something I want to do that’s...mmm, sex-related. And we need to wait for that.”
“All right,” he replied, withdrawing his hand and instead pulling her a little closer to himself. “We’ll wait.”
“Dear God, thank you,” she said, resting her head on his shoulder. “The amount of times I had to shut down my ex-husband when he tried to get too frisky in public and he’d just fucking sulk for hours afterwards…” She sighed heavily. “Do I talk about him too much?”
