The Daughter-in-Law, page 28
She was about to show herself how.
Daniel and she had agreed that they each would tell their partners together on the following Sunday evening. Then they would move into a hotel, followed by a rented flat, while everything was sorted out and until everything had settled down. It would in the end, because these things always did in one way or another. Jen would make sure the girls were okay. So would Hope.
Edie was praying that once Paul’s initial shock and anger – she was prepared for all that – had died down, they’d be able to work out a way of co-parenting Hazel and Betty. She was determined not to go the way of the rich vindictive clients she so often dealt with who forgot about the wellbeing of their kids in their desire for revenge. Paul, at heart, wasn’t like that. In time, he would be ready to listen.
Paul sat on the sofa, obviously taken aback when she took the chair nearby him instead of plumping down beside him. He looked tired and grey, slumped, as he had since reading Daniel’s text, as if his stuffing had been ripped out. Her timing couldn’t be worse; it was one thing on top of the other, but circumstances were driving them now and decisions had taken on a momentum of their own. He looked down at his hands, waiting for her to say something. Did he have an inkling of what was about to hit him?
Edie sat up straight, drawing on every ounce of self-control. She wanted to make this as easy as she could for him, but that was not going to be possible. A sip of wine and a deep breath.
Paul looked up expectant, unhappy.
‘Paul, darling Paul. There’s something I have to tell you…’
31
Hope set off early to meet Patrick in one of the fancy restaurants behind Kings Cross. He’d suggested they meet there and booked a table, so all she had to do was turn up. She glanced down at her belted vintage tea-dress, red with gaudy flowers. It was a statement, if ever there was one. Notice me, I’m not over yet.
Their table was outside, so she was able to sit in the sun, watching the world go by. So many people enjoying the brilliant September weather, walking up to the canal or back down to the station, everything overshadowed by the cranes towering into the blue sky. Summer dresses, ice creams, sunhats, smiles – London at its most relaxed. An Indian summer. Eventually she saw Patrick walking briskly from the station. He was dressed smartly in a suit with the jacket slung over his shoulder, shirt collar open, and he looked uncannily like a young Martin. Even more so than Paul ever had.
He kissed her on the cheek and pulled out the other chair. ‘I’m so sorry. Train was delayed. Have you a coffee?’
She hadn’t, so he ordered for them both. Eventually, they were settled. She was pleased to be with him. Although there was so much she knew about him, there was so much more that she wanted to know, so much that would take a lifetime to learn. She knew she couldn’t keep firing questions at him like the Inquisition. The story of his life must be allowed to unroll gradually as they got to know each other.
‘I’m sorry to drag you down here,’ he said. ‘But there’s something I wanted to tell you and it feels better doing it face to face.’
She had a moment of panic, imagining the worst – that he had decided to withdraw from her and her family. He’d found them and that was enough. His curiosity had been satisfied and he didn’t want any more contact because his heart lay with the family who had brought him up instead. The dramas that had recently overtaken them had been too much, and he wanted no part of them anymore. She took a sip of her flat white and braced herself for the worst.
He cut one of the pastries in half and put one piece on a plate for her. ‘Well, two things really. We talked about Edie, remember?’
‘Of course.’ She couldn’t imagine what he could have to say about her daughter-in-law that merited a trip to Kings Cross.
‘I’m afraid I’ve been a bit underhand.’ He grimaced. ‘I told Sandy to tell Daniel that he couldn’t use the flat again, and if he didn’t stop seeing Edie, he would tell his wife.’
She was astonished. ‘You did that? But that’s blackmail! What happened?’ Hope was equally impressed and shocked by his guile.
‘Apparently, he was so convincing that Daniel agreed, begging him not to say anything. Although it was really none of my business, it struck me that it was just that one thing I could do for you and Paul, so I did.’ He immediately looked apprehensive.
‘But that’s really wonderful,’ she said. ‘Thank you.’ Edie thwarted might not be an easy person to live with, but that was a bridge to be crossed later.
‘Is it?’ He allowed himself to smile at last. ‘I was worried you might think I was interfering. I had to think twice before I said anything.’
‘Neither Paul nor I could have done it, so I’m glad. And, of course, Paul will never know.’ Despite him suspecting the affair, perhaps there was a chance that Paul’s marriage would be saved after all, and nothing needed to be said. She might not ever have an easy relationship with her daughter-in-law after all this, but in future she would leave Edie well alone and just try to rub along when they had to. Hope knew so much that she wished she didn’t about her. For the first time, she saw a similarity between their two predicaments. A lifetime secret as a result – all so as not to hurt the person they loved.
‘That’s right,’ said Patrick. ‘Not from me, anyway.’
‘What was the second thing?’
He brightened. ‘I wanted you to know first… Clem’s pregnant! She’s gone to see her dad to tell him. We wanted to tell you both at exactly the same time. You’re going to be a grandmother again.’
She leapt to her feet and hugged him. ‘What fantastic news. I’m so pleased for you both. When?’
‘Another six months to go. We didn’t want to say anything until we knew it was definitely happening – didn’t want to tempt fate. We’re not finding out whether it’s a girl or a boy, so that’ll be another surprise. Clem’s wondering if you’d like to come and visit us – she wants your opinion on the baby’s room.’
‘I’d love to.’ How wonderful that she was going to be included. This was much more than she had a right to expect.
Her phone buzzed in her pocket. Probably Vita about the job they had that evening, except Hope had prepped everything and would have plenty of time to finish off when she got home. ‘Do you mind if I just check, in case it’s a work emergency?’
‘Of course not.’
But it wasn’t Vita. It was a message from Paul asking her to call him. She would do so on the way home. How pleased he’d be to have Patrick’s news too. A cousin for Betty and Hazel.
‘This is so exciting!’ Also, the first time she had felt so pleased about something for ages. Meeting Patrick and introducing him to the family had been circumscribed by so many other feelings that the pleasure had been diminished. But this was something else.
‘I hoped you’d be pleased.’
‘More than you can know.’ This baby would be a chance for them all to start again and would bring so much joy to them all. Even Edie. Surely.
They had their coffee, then Patrick wanted to get home so that he could spend the rest of the day with Clem. Hope remembered how once, a long time ago, it had been like that with Martin. She couldn’t help wondering what he was up to at that moment. Was he coming round to understanding her actions? She suspected not. That sort of generosity of understanding and forgiveness did not come easy to him. Not immediately, at least. She would have to get used to the idea that their relationship was probably over. At least he left it knowing what had happened so many years ago and had met Patrick. Truth, then, if not reconciliation. He and Hope could have their separate relationships with their two sons, if not with each other anymore. Hope had attempted to contact him, but had failed. He hadn’t returned her call or her email. Patrick had assured her that he and Paul would try to make him see sense, but she had very little hope that would work.
As she walked back along the canal, past the narrowboats – some better maintained than others with bright paint and roofs of potted plants – she got out her phone to call Paul. He answered immediately.
‘Mum!’ She could sense from the break in his voice that something was wrong.
‘I’m sorry. I was having lunch with Patrick. Clem’s pregnant! Isn’t that wonderful news?’
Paul choked out a ‘Yes’, but nothing more.
‘Are you all right?”
‘She’s leaving me.’ He was crying, she could make it out now. Her happiness at Patrick’s news dropped away.
‘What do you mean?’ She’d believed that Patrick’s intervention had ended the affair. How stupid she felt. How sad for Paul.
He blew his nose. ‘Exactly that. I was right about her having an affair. She’s hooked up with a guy she knew before me. Her first love. Daniel. They’ve been seeing each other since Betty was born.’ He gasped for air. ‘She’s leaving today; feels the quicker the ties are cut the better.’
Hope felt punched in the gut. ‘So soon! What about the girls? Can I come over and help?’
Advising Edie to come clean might not have been the right thing to do. Had she forced her hand? Made her decide before she was ready?
‘Come later, when Edie’s gone. She’s packing. Jen’s been here this morning and she’s told me she’ll stay on with them and help with the transition so I can keep working. Not that I feel much like doing anything.’
‘Bless her, but can you afford her now? Can I help?’
‘Edie’s going to keep on paying her. When she told me last night, she had it all worked out. She wants the girls to stay here with me.’
Hope gasped. ‘She’s not taking them?’ Her first selfish reaction was that at least she wouldn’t lose them too.
‘No. She loves this guy, and she loves her career, so she’s leaving to live with him. He’s another barrister. She says she’d like to have the girls every Wednesday night and every other weekend. Can you believe that? Her own daughters. It’s all so calculated.’
‘No, I can’t.’ It might be all worked out, but that didn’t mean it wouldn’t hurt Edie terribly. Hope knew exactly what that felt like. But what about Paul? While Edie got the life she wanted, how would he manage with two small girls to look after? What about the girls themselves? ‘I’m coming over.’
‘No, Mum, don’t. Please. You’ll only make things worse.’ His distress was awful to hear.
‘Where are you now?’
‘In the shed, trying to straighten my head out.’
‘And the girls?’
‘Jen’s got Hazel and will pick up Betty from nursery and take them to the park. We decided it was better that they didn’t have to say goodbye to Edie today. Jesus! I can’t believe this is happening.’
‘Nor can I.’ She was crying too. Although she had known there was a faint chance something like this might happen, she had trusted the girls would keep Edie with Paul. How would Paul juggle his work or his studies if he went through with that idea now? How would he ever get over this? All she knew was she would be there to help him in any way she could.
‘How can she do this, Mum? How? I thought she loved us.’
‘I don’t know,’ Hope said, carefully. ‘She’s not someone who makes snap decisions. And you say she’s known this guy for ages so she must have been thinking about it for some time.’ She wondered whether Patrick’s intervention had provoked this fork in the road rather than helped. But there was little point in dwelling on what had happened. The affair had been going on for a long time and there was nothing anyone could do to turn the clock back. Once Edie’s mind was made up, trying to stop her would be like standing in front of a steam roller. Impossible. ‘You’ll have to focus on the girls so this affects them as little as possible, and I’ll help you as much as I can.’
‘As little as possible?’ His voice rose to a shout. ‘Their mother’s leaving them. How can they not be affected?’
‘Okay, I’m sorry. Look, I’m walking home at the moment. I’ll come round as soon as you’d like me to. Just call me. Any time at all.’ What she wanted to do was to dash round there and make things better for him, despite knowing there was nothing she could do to alleviate his pain. However, she respected his request for her to stay away for the moment, said a tearful goodbye and continued her way home.
What was the saying? ‘You’re only as happy as your unhappiest child.’ So, this was what that felt like – utterly inconsolable.
As soon as she got through her front door, she threw herself on the sofa and burst into tears. She and Paul had been through so much upset recently. How would they survive this, too? It felt as though they were suddenly confronted by a new mountain to climb, and they hadn’t yet reached the foothills. How could Edie take such a drastic decision? She hadn’t found motherhood easy, as Hope knew – but this! Hope knew what it was to give up a child. She couldn’t imagine what must be going through Edie’s mind, the struggle she must have had in coming to this decision.
How would Paul cope? Her thoughts remained with him as she gradually pulled herself together and went downstairs into the pro kitchen. Vita would be here soon, and they’d have to finish off, as far as they could, before going round to that evening’s booking – an anniversary dinner. She hadn’t the heart for it, but when she was phoned by a woman who wanted to surprise her husband but had three children and no babysitter, she couldn’t say no. She’d kept it simple but impressive – scallops, ossobuco and tiramisu. None of it would pack or transport itself, so she had to get on with it.
She texted Vita and told her she didn’t need to come.
I’m on top of it and can manage on my own. Enjoy your evening instead. Honestly.
The truth was, she would prefer to do everything on her own at that moment. Having something to do kept her occupied, but she didn’t want to talk about what was happening until she had processed it herself and spoken properly to Paul. This proposed arrangement for Edie to see the children in such a limited way troubled her. The worry was that Edie would have second thoughts, then turn and use her barrister skills and connections to take the children away. Whatever she said in the heat of the moment could so easily be overturned given time and a change of perspective.
She sighed. The previous few months had been so fraught with secrets, betrayal and high emotion. What on earth were the next few going to bring?
32
One year later…
‘Granny, look at me!’ Betty called from the swimming pool. She was standing on the steps into the shallow end, ready.
Hope hauled herself up to a sitting position to watch her swim unaided towards Paul, who was encouraging her, tanned and relaxed after being in Amorgos for ten days. A different holiday, a different Greek island.
‘That’s brilliant.’ Hope clapped her hands from the sun lounger, watching Paul slip the child’s armbands back on so they could go deeper in the pool and splash around with the white unicorn float toy. He collected Hazel from the steps, where she was sitting in her ring, splashing her hands in the water, waiting for him.
‘Come on, little one. Let’s swim.’ He swooshed her towards Betty.
Raising her hand to shield her eyes against the sun, Hope squinted to her right where Clem sat in the shade with Dylan, her third grandchild. He was sitting up on the terrace, surrounded by cushions from indoors, beaming at anyone who came near. After a grouchy, sleepless start in life, he’d become an amiable little boy whom they all adored.
Patrick was inside, cooking.
Family. That’s what this holiday was all about.
The door to the kitchen was open, but the shuttered windows of the house were keeping the sun out, so the interior remained as cool as possible. A fig tree stood to one side, its green fruit just beginning to ripen in the sun, a couple of hibiscus bushes trumpeted red flowers and bougainvillea draped purple and red over the wall. Cicadas shrilled in the background, perhaps from the gnarled olive trees that grew around the garden. The view beyond the swimming pool spread across the rooftops of the neighbouring villas, down to the port town of Katapola and the glittering sea beyond. A safer walk to the sea than the one Hope had embarked on the previous year. But she had been careful not to repeat her accident. This time she really was needed to help out from time to time.
She stretched out, feeling the warmth of the sun on her body, happy at last.
‘Aren’t you coming in, Mum?’
‘Sure. If you want me to.’ Nothing gave her greater pleasure than joining in, but she was aware that sometimes she should wait to be invited. After all, they were Paul’s children, not hers. She had to remember that and keep those boundaries, however tempting it was to comment on what he fed them or how long Betty watched his iPad or any one of those things that differed so much from when she had been bringing him up. If she had learned anything from Edie, it was that.
The water was a heaven-sent relief from the heat, and she swam slowly over to Paul and the girls, relishing every moment.
A little later, there was a shout from the house. ‘Grub’s up. Come and get it!’ Patrick was on the edge of the terrace, wearing an apron over his shorts. The outdoor table was spread with an array of cold meats and cheeses, grapes and oranges, a bowl of pasta for the kids, and a focaccia loaf made by him. He had turned out to be quite a whizz in the kitchen, and Hope was delighted to have the onus removed from her this once.
