Wicked Envy, page 12
And it’s beautiful to me.
CHAPTER 16
Dane
I silently count Andrew’s reps as he strains to complete the chest presses. He’s going for a triple personal best, and my hands hover over the bar to help him should his muscles fail. With a long grunt causing every vein to stand out on his forehead, he pushes the third one up and I help him rack the weight.
“Good job,” I praise as he sits up to straddle the bench, swiping the towel from the floor and wiping his face.
Andrew and I work out together three times a week at Caterva’s gym. Every Sunday, Tuesday, and Thursday, with Sunday being chest, shoulders, and core. Usually after, we’ll head up to our offices to put in a good day’s work, where Avril will already be chugging away. It’s how it’s always been… three hard-working people who don’t know what a forty-hour week looks like.
My motto has always been work hard, play hard, which is why I’m a member of The Wicked Horse. Looks like that’s becoming Andrew and Avril’s motto as well. Avril called me last night after she left Andrew’s apartment and told me everything they talked about.
She also told me everything they did together, and it was enough to get me rock hard thinking about it. I want the three of us together again and soon, but I also need to check in with Andrew to make sure he’s truly okay with this.
“Avril told me about last night,” I say, and his head snaps around to look at me. He seems guarded at first, but then he lets out a sigh as he pushes up from the bench.
“This is some crazy shit, brother,” he says with resignation. “But I couldn’t say no to her last night.”
“I’m glad you didn’t.”
“So, it doesn’t bother you that I was alone with Avril?” he asks, his eyebrow cocking with skepticism.
I open my mouth to give a resounding “not a bit,” but snap it back shut as I take stock of a tiny bit of apprehension squeezing my chest. Yes, last night when Avril told me about what they did, I was turned way the fuck on. But I was also a little bit envious that I wasn’t there.
I also spent some time wondering if Andrew got her off better than I did, or if she enjoyed swallowing his cum more than mine. Then I immediately felt guilty for even having lewd thoughts about my best friend.
Pushing those thoughts out of my head, I give him a smile. “It’s good, man. We’ve been clear what this is, and we’ve set the boundaries.”
“Do the boundaries include other men and women in this scenario?” he asks, and now I’m the one to blink in surprise. It hadn’t occurred to me to discuss exclusivity because I had just assumed it was a given. When three close friends decide to fuck each other in a three way without protection, that just implies to me that none of us are fucking other people.
“It’s just us,” I tell him firmly.
“Avril said she only wanted the two of us. Both together and alone,” Andrew tells me.
“Then it’s just the three of us. No one else.” That sounds right, except I can’t ignore the immense feeling of relief I just felt sweep through me when Andrew told me that Avril wanted us individually as well. Because while her taking both of us night before last was hot as fuck, I want her very much alone as well.
Andrew moves over to the shoulder-press machine, and I follow behind him. I think he’s on board, but there’s one thing I have to know exactly where he stands on. “Are you okay with the individual times together that Avril seems to want?”
I think I’m asking the question because Andrew’s the one whose heart stands the biggest risk of getting confused in all this, but in all actuality… I’m asking because I already know I’m going to have to put some major effort into not being jealous over Avril and Andrew being alone.
My legs practically give way on me when Andrew turns to look at me and slowly shakes his head. “I can’t do the individual.”
“What?” I ask in pure disbelief. I mean… why the fuck would he not want Avril in his bed alone?
“Because when it’s the three of us together, I can pretend that it’s just friendship. That it’s just the three of us doing everything together like we’ve done for seventeen years. Anything past that, and it gets too confusing.”
Jesus fuck, but he’s nailed it.
The big fucking problem in all of this.
I don’t know what to say, so I adjust the weights on the press and sit to straddle the seat. Before I can take the handles though, Andrew asks me, “What about you?”
My eyes raise to his. Because there’s no way I can lie to him about this, I tell him a truth that’s very painful for me to admit. “I like the individual. The connection. I’ve never had that before and it’s scary, but it also feels comfortable because it’s Avril.”
Andrew’s eyes round with surprise, because for all the years he’s known me, he knows I’ve never felt for a woman the way I’m admitting to now.
“Dude… are you sure this is a good idea?” he mutters.
“Yes,” I say without hesitation. “As long as you’re okay with me having alone time with Avril if I want it.”
“This is so fucked up,” Andrew rasps out. “I’m okay with a threesome because that seems the most impersonal to me. You’re okay with the threesome and you want time with her alone, because you’re feeling something you’ve never felt before. And Avril wants us both in any way she can have us. This spells fucking disaster.”
“Want to stop?” I ask.
Andrew tilts his head back and looks at the ceiling a moment before giving me his answer. “No. I can’t turn away from that type of pull… the things the three of us could do together. The things you and I could do to Avril together. But I’m worried about you, Dane. You’re the one walking dangerous territory.”
I brush his concerns off even though I know they’re legit. “It’ll be fine. We’ll be good.”
Andrew stares at me without saying anything, so I grab the handles of the press and push upward, starting my reps. When I’m done, he makes a slight adjustment on the weights and completes his.
As we’re switching, he catches me off guard again. “When we go to Paris, are we just going to stay in one room together?”
I practically drop the weight, and have to heave it back up. I keep my gaze on the opposite wall while I finish my reps. When I lower the press back to neutral, I say, “I hadn’t thought about it. Probably not.”
“We could just get a suite,” he suggests.
Jesus, I can’t believe he’s thinking about this. I’m the one worried about having alone time with Avril, and he’s planning out the best way for all three of us to fuck while we’re in Paris next week to visit Fabron’s company. He extended an invitation to us as a means of transparency. He’s going to give us an inside look at his technology, hoping to prove to us he’s very serious about joining forces.
“That’s fine,” I mumble, immediately castigating myself for thinking about Avril. Separate rooms would mean I’d have more individual time with her, and it’s not good to be thinking that way at all.
How in the fuck I’ve become Andrew in this situation and he’s become me is beyond any logic I can fathom. I suspect it’s because Avril and I do share that one thing that I don’t have with Andrew, and that’s her knowledge about my father coming to see me and how that affected me.
Andrew knows the general story that he abandoned me and I was raised in the foster system. He knows things such as I’d never really celebrated holidays. The first time I was invited to Thanksgiving at his house, it was totally awkward for me. Granted, over the years, I’d been invited to spend time at both Avril and Andrew’s family homes, and I’m very fond of their families. But Andrew also knows, same as Avril, that my lack of experiences accompanied with some abandonment issues is what keeps me guarded and closed off from wanting a relationship or a family of my own. I don’t need fucking counseling to know that’s true as I’m a pretty self-aware guy.
Avril knows more about the situation, though. She’s the one who was there the day my dad showed up out of the blue at our apartment. She’s the one who saw my reaction. She’s the one I had no choice but to show my vulnerability to, and she’s the one who stepped up to the plate to protect me.
Avril’s the one who, when it was all over, didn’t force me to talk about it. She respected my need to keep that private, and I was more grateful to her for that than anything.
Except there’s one other thing that had set Avril apart from Andrew over the years, and she doesn’t even know I know about it.
It was toward the end of our senior year at Berkley, and I needed some post-it notes. I was fresh out but as is the way of good friends and roommates, I knew I could borrow some from either Andrew or Avril. They weren’t home, but we were freely allowed to borrow stuff from each other. Andrew’s room was closest to mine, but he didn’t have any.
Avril’s room was neat and orderly, without anything out on her desk. I started rummaging through her drawers. In the last one I found a stack of post-its. I also found a folder that had the name “Lyndon Hawthorne” written on the tab.
My father’s name.
I couldn’t help myself. I pulled it out and opened it up, stunned to see several pages of notes all in Avril’s handwriting. She had apparently tracked my father down at some point after he left and had his whereabouts, including an address and a phone number. She also had a sheet of paper entitled “Pros and Cons” and it looked like a list she wrote out debating whether or not to turn this information over to me.
Some of the pros were things like “will help him heal” and “he can have a family one day”. Those fucking words made my nose sting as I realized she was keenly aware of my walls caused by my father when he abandoned me.
The cons were things like “maybe it’s too late” and “he didn’t ask me to nose around in his business”.
At the bottom of that sheet was a line that read: “Conclusion: I don’t know what to do.”
I flipped through more of the documents, which included a criminal record check on my father showing he’d spent some time in prison for drugs, as well as notes from phone calls she’d made to people to check him out. It looked like he did home inspections or some shit like that, and she had pretended to call for references from people he’d done work for. I remember they were all good things like “dependable” and “on time” and “good quality work for good price”.
I must have sat at her desk, reading over everything three, maybe four, times to soak it all in. I wasn’t pissed she’d done it, but rather amazed she would think to. When she pushed him out of the apartment, I didn’t give him another thought, but she had.
Avril had ultimately decided not to tell me. From what I could make of her notes, she had done all that research within the first few weeks after his visit. She’d held onto that information for months, apparently having decided not to share it with me.
It was that knowledge that made me realize I loved her for the first time. It had become clear that the bonds of our friendship were forged in steel, and that Avril cared about my entire well-being.
I never told her I found the information. I put it back in her desk, borrowed the post-its, and went on with my life.
I have no clue if she still has it, but for the first time in years, I wonder if perhaps it was foreshadowing the very circumstances I find myself in. There’s something deep within me that wants more from Avril than what we’ve discussed. It’s at war with my need to avoid relationships, yet I find myself now thinking about that damn folder with information about my father.
Completely wondering if maybe now is the time in my life where I’m supposed to confront that shit.
CHAPTER 17
Avril
My doorbell rings, and I walk—uncomfortably—to the front door. When I pull it open, Dane and Andrew stand there. Dane has a bouquet of flowers, and Andrew has a half-gallon of ice cream.
“Okay, that’s just awkward,” I tell the men as I eyeball their gifts. I turn and walk back into my house, knowing they’ll follow. “This isn’t a date.”
Dane grins, and Andrew snickers before saying, “No more awkward than the way you’re walking right now.”
I twist my neck to glare at him. “Yeah, well… you have a huge ass plug in you and see how you’re walking.”
“Poor baby,” Dane croons as he closes the door, but he doesn’t sound sympathetic at all.
The jackass wouldn’t either, since I’m quite sure this whole ‘make Avril as uncomfortable as possible while anticipating tonight’ idea was his.
Our workday had started off regularly enough. I made it to the office first, followed by Andrew and then Dane. You’d never have known by the casual way we greeted each other that the three of us had been fucking all night at The Wicked Horse. In fact, I’ve been with either Dane or Dane and Drew together every night since my evening alone with Andrew, and it only gets more exciting as every day passes.
The only thing that’s a little weird is that Andrew bugged out one night so it was just Dane and me together, and it was amazing. He and I played with the dildo machine at the club, and then he came back to my house and stayed the night.
Although today started normal, it didn’t stay that way. That’s because at about three o’clock this afternoon, Dane and Andrew showed up at my office door and closed it behind them. For a moment, I thought we had some very confidential business to discuss.
That was dispelled when Dane pulled out a butt plug, held it up, and said, “Take your panties off.”
My response. “Oh, hell no.”
“Tonight’s the night, Avril,” he said in a smooth, low voice that caused my pussy to tingle from the promise in it. I knew what he meant by the plug in his hand—that tonight I was going to have both of them in me at the same time. I’d asked about it, and I was promised it would be done right.
“We’re starting your prep a little early,” Andrew said, and the wicked look on his normally wholesome-looking face made my legs shake.
So. I ended up bent over my desk with my skirt hiked up, my panties pulled down, and Andrew’s fingers playing with my clit until I orgasmed. Dane pushed the lubed plug in my ass at that moment, and I thought I was going to die.
“Don’t take it out,” he’d warned me, and I had to admit… it felt good. It wasn’t overly large and it was so dirty that I was wearing it to a four o’clock meeting. The knowing looks Andrew and Dane kept shooting me made my panties wet, and it was difficult to concentrate.
Things got a little more uncomfortable when Dane showed back up at my office door at five o’clock. He gave me no choice but to assume the position over my desk while he fingered me to an orgasm. As the first tremors started, he pulled the plug out of me. I had to bite on the palm of my hand to stop from screaming.
He wasn’t done, however.
He merely replaced that plug with a larger one, and as I groaned out my discomfort when I stood back up, he merely gave me a quick kiss on the mouth and whispered, “You need this so you can handle my cock in your ass tonight.”
I almost combusted right there.
The men insisted we do tonight at my house. While every other night has been at the club, tonight was special because man was going where no man had been before in my body. I was nervous as hell and they both knew it, so I was relieved we’d have some privacy in case I chickened out the minute Dane tried to impale me with his huge dick.
The plug had been uncomfortable to wear, and I actually left work a little early because I was cranky and horny at the same time. So, while Andrew and Dane veer off to the kitchen to supposedly put the ice cream in the freezer and the flowers in a vase—which, admittedly, was as sweet as it was weird—I head into my bedroom because I don’t need much seduction tonight.
I’m ready.
Making quick work of removing my clothes, I position myself in the middle of my bed with my legs spread and my fingers playing between my legs when they walk in. Both stop just inside the door and stare at me with burning eyes. The need among all three of us is almost tangible, and I hoarsely order them to get naked.
They comply readily and there is nothing sexier than watching two gorgeous, ripped men with huge erections taking their clothes off. Knowing that both of those cocks are going to have me at the same tonight has my pussy already slippery and my ass muscles pulsing around the plug.
When the last of the clothing hits the floor, I roll off the bed and walk up to Andrew and Dane. I step in between them, one to each side of me, and take a cock in each hand. I start stroking, tilting my head first to kiss Andrew, then over to Dane. Both men groan into my mouth. When I pull my lips from Dane’s, I drop to my knees in between them.
I stroke Andrew’s cock while turning to take Dane’s in my mouth. His hips punch forward at first contact and I almost gag, but he pulls back slightly and I adjust. I suck at him for several moments, keeping a nice pace on Andrew’s dick with my hand.
Then it’s Andrew’s turn to get my mouth and he whispers, “Fuck,” as I take him inside. I grip Dane hard with my hand as I know he likes it a little rough, and he hums approval from deep in his throat.
I alternate back and forth between the two, so lost in what I’m doing I’m barely aware of one of them pulling me up to my feet. Opening my eyes, I see it’s Dane and before I know it, I’m flat on my back on the bed. My legs are pulled open, and I cry out as both men take turns tonguing my clit. I push up to my elbows to watch, fascinated that these two purely heterosexual males are sharing something so intimate. Their mouths don’t touch but they come awful close, and I would kill to have them kiss each other.
When Andrew sticks three fingers inside of me and Dane sucks hard on my clit, my first orgasm tears through me and my hips shoot off the bed. When they land back on the mattress, the plug in my ass jostles and it sparks my orgasm harder.
“She’s ready,” Dane says confidently. Because I’m completely boneless, I can only gasp as I’m pulled back up off the bed. I fall into Dane’s arms, vaguely aware of Andrew taking my place in the middle of the bed.
