21 Shades of Night, page 15
“Like I said, I called your house a few times. William kept giving excuses when I asked to speak with you, so I knew something was up. When Neal commandeered the last conversation, your father said he’d changed his mind about us mating and that I shouldn’t call the house again.” He placed his hand back into his lap. “Needless to say, that didn’t sit well with me. I went there in person, and William said you’d run away. That struck me as odd, since you hadn’t come to my parents’ place, so I thought maybe you came here.” He ran a hand through his blond hair. “I wasn’t positive, but after the other day, I figured it wouldn’t hurt to check. Here you are. My only question is, why didn’t you come to me? I could’ve helped. I’m one of your kind. It’s dangerous for you to be here. Our people will kill you, and him.” He jabbed his thumb in Derek’s direction.
Why did I come here? To protect myself from my father. If he found me, I doubted I’d escape fate twice. I leaned back into the couch and rubbed a hand over my face. How could I tell him? Did I want to? If I didn’t, then he’d never understand.
“My father attacked me. He...did more than just beat me. He tried to rape me. I knew he’d find me at your place, and I didn’t want to risk being returned to him.” The words hurt, but maybe they needed to be said so Brendan would understand why I acted the way I did.
His face twisted in confusion, before slow horror filled his eyes. He froze, and pain created lines around the corners of his eyes. “Your father did that to you? Your own father?” He balled his fists and lowered his head. Energy pulsed around him, pushing in hot waves against my skin, as if he was fighting for control. When he’d gotten himself more or less stable, he glanced up at me.
I nodded, not wanting to verbalize my feelings, as if that would make them real.
Brendan pulled me to him. “God. I should’ve helped you whether you wanted it or not. I’m so sorry. I should’ve objected when your mother suggested you go home. You were under my protection, and I’ve failed you.” He rested his cheek on my uninjured shoulder.
My body froze under the onslaught of touch, and I gently pushed away from him once I regained my composure. “You couldn’t have stopped him. Besides, I doubt your father likes me much, especially after what mine said to him. I didn’t feel comfortable showing up on your doorstep with his scent on me.”
He ran his hand through his hair again. “My father does like you, but he didn’t appreciate the way William acted. My father isn’t used to disrespect, especially from someone who should know better. But I guess you’re right about one thing. I would’ve lost control and ripped William’s head off—regardless of the consequences. I’m sorry.”
“That doesn’t matter now. What matters is that we keep her safe.” Derek leaned against the wall near a window. He looked serious and solemn.
“What do you suggest?” Brendan asked.
“Take her to a safe place. Not your home, but somewhere you think she’d be protected. My friend was abducted from my home—the vampire who saved you the other night. I have to find him.” His face was grim, and he shifted his weight as if unable to relax.
“Chandra’s also missing,” Brendan said, glancing back at me. “Your father said he sent her to look for you, but she never came home. He suggested that you two were off somewhere together, but as we can see, that’s not true.”
My mouth dropped open. Guilt clenched my gut. She’d protected me from my father, and I’d left her and my mother to his violence. What had I subjected them to? I should’ve done something sooner to return the favor, and now I might be too late. Tears stung my eyes.
Elliot was taken from Derek’s home, and now I knew Chandra was missing. What if the kidnappers had both Elliot and Chandra? It might explain why she’d never gone home. Of course, she could also be tired of the abuse, but with her horrible childhood, she’d told me a few times how she never wanted to go back to being homeless. Ever.
I didn’t want to think of the third option. Maybe my father killed her. No, he’s a monster, but there have to be limits. There have to be.
“I don’t want to go to a safe house. What if my cousin was captured too? I know her, and I don’t think she’d run away. She saved me. She doesn’t deserve to be taken, and I want to help you find Elliot, Derek. He was good to both of us.” I turned to Brendan. “Please...”
Brendan worked his jaw, tightening and loosening the muscles. “Yes, he was. If it weren’t for you two, we might not be here after the incident with the Cazador. I wish there was something I could do to help.” He was such a good guy, but part of that was probably for my sake. I wished I could repay him for his kindness. “I promise I won’t tell my father about you being here, Carmela.” He looked at me then Derek. Sadness crept into his gaze. “I’d like to talk with you alone.”
Derek pushed away from the wall and moved as if to separate Brendan from me. “You should be leaving. She wants to stay here.”
“Derek, don’t. Please go upstairs and don’t listen in.” I didn’t want to hurt him. He’d been there for me, but I also couldn’t help melting at the pain in Brendan’s eyes. He’d suffered because of me, and I hated that. “Please.”
He glanced between us and narrowed his eyes at Brendan. “Call my name if you need me.”
“I will.” I turned on the couch to face Brendan better, but I didn’t close the space between us. I didn’t feel that comfortable around him yet, even though I knew he wouldn’t hurt me.
Derek’s quiet footsteps faded as he headed up the stairs.
Brendan returned his gaze to my face. “I know there’s something going on between you and him. While I’m not sure why you’re interested in him, I know you felt something for me, just as I do for you.” He put his forearms on his knees and leaned a little closer. “You’re more to me than an arranged relationship. I worried so much when I couldn’t reach you. Did I say something wrong? I knew I shouldn’t have let you leave. I should have stopped you, but...” He lowered his gaze, his face twisting with emotion. “But I had no idea William was the kind of man to try something like that. I’m sorry, babe. I let you down, but I can’t let you slip away from me. That would be my biggest regret.”
The tears hanging in my eyes slid down my cheeks. I’d been wrong about him.
His eyes watered too, but he kept the moisture from falling. “Say something. Please.”
I scooted closer to him and wrapped my arms around his chest. He held me lightly, as if unsure what to do. “I care about you too.”
“If you mate with me, I can protect you. He won’t be able to hurt you again.” He hugged me a little tighter. The warmth of his affection relaxed me a little, even if the words stirred up panic.
Movement on the balcony overlooking the living room caught my attention. Derek slipped back into the shadows, but I’d seen his stoic expression.
I cared for both men. What was I supposed to do?
Chapter 41
Brendan
I COULDN’T SUPPRESS my relief that Carmela hadn’t fled to Derek because she hated me. But I still seethed with anger that her father had almost raped her. If I’d known things would get so bad, I could’ve done something to prevent her pain... Maybe I should’ve pressed to visit her sooner, or talked my father into bumping up the mating ritual. No, I couldn’t second-guess myself. What William did wasn’t normal. You didn’t expect your future mate’s father to do something like that.
“M-mate? S-so soon?” Carmela met my gaze with slivers of panic in her eyes.
Damn. The last thing I wanted to do was scare her. My words had just slipped out in my desperation to draw her close, although I meant them from the bottom of my heart. What if they drove her away from me? I’d been unable to protect her before due to our customs, but now I could change that. My father was the Alpha of Alphas. He could ensure her safety and bring William to justice once we were mated.
The only other thing that bothered me was how she looked at Derek.
“The sooner the better, babe.” Glancing up at the balcony, I caught Derek watching us from the shadows. He wasn’t trying very hard to conceal himself. Emotions warred within me. She was my future mate, but the two of them seemed to have feelings for one another. I was grateful that Derek watched over her while I was injured and at home, but I couldn’t let him take her from me. I was falling in love with her.
She chewed on her lower lip. Memories of our kiss shoved all other thoughts aside. The only thing that kept me from leaning in to claim her mouth again was the worry in her eyes. I brushed a strand of hair from her cheek, tucking it behind her ear. She leaned into my palm.
“I—”
“You don’t have to make that decision right now, love.” Derek walked toward us, stopping mere feet away, and much closer than I’d have preferred.
Every muscle in my body tensed. “She was going to say something. Let her speak.” The hair on the back of my neck rose, and a low growl trickled up from my chest. I must’ve been so caught up in being close to Carmela that I hadn’t remained aware of our surroundings. Vampires were stealthy, but I was the Alpha of Alphas’ son; my keen senses were sharpened from an early age. He shouldn’t have been able to sneak up on me.
She placed a small hand against my chest. “It’s okay, Brendan.” She leaned up and brushed her soft lips against mine.
I gently cupped her cheeks, not wanting just a chaste peck. After everything that had happened, I needed more than that. I needed her. Her hands covered mine, and she softly moaned as I swiped my tongue over her lower lip.
Derek cleared his throat. “As I said before, you should be going.” His power surged toward us in a hot wave.
Carmela tried to turn to look at him, but I kept her gaze on me. “I can protect you. Just say yes.” My wolf wanted to rip the vampire’s throat out, regardless of the help he and his friend had provided us. That would resolve some of my problems, but it went against the kind of man I was. Besides, he’d taken care of Carmela when I could not. Regret twisted my stomach in knots.
Derek took a couple steps closer. “You had your chance to talk with her. Leave us.”
I grabbed the crutch from beside me and stood. Our eyes met, and I felt the soft tug of his power as he tried to mess with my mind. Even though I was injured, I wouldn’t put up with this. He might have feelings for her, but she was a werewolf, and my destined mate.
“Guys, please.” Carmela looked between us and sighed. “I need to talk with you both.”
Chapter 42
Carmela
I WAVED TO the couch on either side of me, but the men’s eyes were locked on one another. It was as if I didn’t exist. I rubbed my hands over my face, but the familiar caress of power wafting off Derek caught my attention.
Brendan swayed on his feet for half a second; then he jerked forward as if he were a puppet on strings. He tackled Derek to the ground, and I leapt to my feet, stunned at what was happening. While I didn’t doubt Brendan was swift and agile, he’d moved very fast considering his current condition. He straddled Derek and cocked back his fist.
I leapt over the coffee table and grabbed Brendan’s arm. He started to turn his head, but suddenly we were both flying. I groaned as my body hit the soft couch cushions. A loud thud caught my attention as Brendan slammed into the opposite wall.
Derek looked between us before glaring at Brendan. He rushed to my side. “Love, lay back. Let me check you out.” He lowered his voice a little, as if Brendan couldn’t hear us.
I clenched both of my hands into fists, even though it hurt my right arm. “I’m fine.” I pushed into a sitting position. “If you two are done trying to kill each other, I really need to talk with you both.” While I cared about Brendan, I also felt deeply for Derek. I couldn’t push one away for the other. After everything that had happened recently, I knew without a doubt that I was safest with both of them. I just hoped they’d understand, and not push me away because of my feelings.
Pain tightened Brendan’s eyes. He pushed up on his elbows, but didn’t make any move to join us on the sofa. His leg. I couldn’t just watch him lay there in discomfort.
“Derek, help me get him to the couch.” I knelt by Brendan’s side and looked up to see Derek lingering a few feet away from us. I shook my head. “You two need to understand something. I care about you both.” I sat beside Brendan. “I’m still trying to regain my strength, and we need to search for Chandra and Elliot. They could be dead for all we know. Now I have to sit here and watch you guys fight over me.”
Derek closed the distance between us and sat beside me. “What do you expect us to do? Share you?” He looked tired and exasperated.
“Yes.” I winced as they both objected at the same time, nearly shouting each other down. I could barely hear either of them. This was exactly the kind of reaction I figured I’d get.
“Come on,” I said, but my voice was lost in their arguing. I jerked to my feet and glared down at them both, my frustration overwhelming my desire to avoid conflict. “Stop it!”
They quieted down but stared at me with such an intensity that the hackles on the back of my neck rose. My wolf pushed to the surface, and my teeth lengthened into fangs as fur lined my skin. If I didn’t get ahold of myself, I’d shift.
Suddenly having their attention didn’t feel so good anymore, but they boxed me in: Brendan on the floor in front of me and Derek at my side, with the wall at my back.
Closing my eyes, I took a few deep breaths, trying to regain control. When I opened them, they were still watching me.
“While that—” Derek spoke as Brendan said, “The wolves—” They shifted their glares to one another. Maybe this was a preview of what being in a relationship with both of them might be like—entirely frustrating.
“Brendan, go ahead since you started talking first, then Derek will speak.” I toyed with the fabric on my splint. Think of the positive. They’re not killing each other. I chewed on my lower lip as I saw the openly hostile look Derek gave Brendan. Hopefully that good luck would last.
“I don’t think you’ve thought this through. The wolves would never agree to something like that. I couldn’t agree to that either. It’d be putting both of us in danger.” He looked at Derek. “All of us.”
“My kindred wouldn’t accept that either, and I wouldn’t be able to coexist with another man in your bed, let alone in your life.” Annoyance marred his pale face.
Butterflies fluttered in my stomach. I’d hoped Derek would be agreeable, but I was wrong. Of course, they had valid points. No one said this would be easy, just as being with Derek alone would require sacrifice. But if we wanted each other badly enough, we could figure out a way, couldn’t we?
Disgusted with the conversation, I stepped over Brendan, needing some distance. Ugh.
“Carmela?” Brendan said. When I didn’t respond, Derek called my name as well, but I ignored them both, heading upstairs. “Wait. Come back here.” No way. I took a few more steps. “Fine. Maybe we should talk about this.” I stopped halfway up and turned to them. Brendan cleared his throat. “Right, Derek?”
I glanced Derek’s way.
He still looked grumpy, but his face was more stoic than Brendan’s, and harder to read. “Yes, we’ll talk about the relationship.” He paused. “Still, it’s not wise for Brendan to be here for an extended period of time. I’m sure there will be those out looking for him.”
Brendan nodded. “Unfortunately he’s right. My dad might send out a search party if I’m gone too long. They wouldn’t have to go far from your house to find me. Maybe you should come with me to a werewolf safe house.”
My father was well connected. The idea of being around a lot of werewolves nauseated me. “I can’t. My father knows where a lot of them are, and even if he doesn’t, other werewolves might talk.”
Wincing, he pushed into a sitting position. “There are a couple only my family knows about. They’re meant to house my father if there’s ever an emergency where he isn’t safe.”
I closed the distance between us as Brendan slowly got to his feet. “I...I’m sorry,” I said, looking into his eyes, then glancing back at Derek. “I just don’t feel comfortable with that idea.”
“I won’t force you to go.” Brendan gave me a quick kiss on the top of my head, surprising me. He looked like he wanted to say more but was afraid of how I’d react. “Take care of her, Derek.”
“I will. When you return tomorrow, use the back door. It’s less conspicuous.” At my surprise, Derek shrugged. “I’m not awake during the day, and I’d like to know you’re protected while I sleep.” He walked with us into the den. “When he comes back, we’ll talk this over. Your wolf is right that mating with him will keep you safe. You two should consummate the relationship.” His lip curled a little in disgust, but he opened the door.
I widened my eyes at him, then turned my stunned gaze to Brendan. I couldn’t believe Derek had said that. Without another word, I retreated upstairs to my room.
Chapter 43
Derek
BRENDAN LOOKED BETWEEN me and Carmela’s retreating back, looking almost as stunned as she did. Then he dipped his head and limped out the door.
Maybe that had been the wrong thing to say, but I didn’t understand their surprised reactions. It wasn’t as if I liked the idea of them being intimate; I couldn’t hold her back from who she was, though. I’d been here to help her heal and rest while she was injured, but now there were problems beyond any of us. We needed to keep her safe from her father and to find Elliot and her cousin.
I closed the door behind me and leaned on it. A blast of wild power and the grotesque sound of Carmela’s transformation drew me up the stairs, but I didn’t dare get too close before she completed her change. I’d seen her near-shift earlier, and I regretted the pain and stress she was going through. This wasn’t easy on any of us, least of all her.
When things quieted down, I took a few more steps toward the door. The soft thump of her hopping off the bed prompted me to knock. I needed to make sure she was all right. It was good for her wound that she’d shifted, but I worried about her.
Why did I come here? To protect myself from my father. If he found me, I doubted I’d escape fate twice. I leaned back into the couch and rubbed a hand over my face. How could I tell him? Did I want to? If I didn’t, then he’d never understand.
“My father attacked me. He...did more than just beat me. He tried to rape me. I knew he’d find me at your place, and I didn’t want to risk being returned to him.” The words hurt, but maybe they needed to be said so Brendan would understand why I acted the way I did.
His face twisted in confusion, before slow horror filled his eyes. He froze, and pain created lines around the corners of his eyes. “Your father did that to you? Your own father?” He balled his fists and lowered his head. Energy pulsed around him, pushing in hot waves against my skin, as if he was fighting for control. When he’d gotten himself more or less stable, he glanced up at me.
I nodded, not wanting to verbalize my feelings, as if that would make them real.
Brendan pulled me to him. “God. I should’ve helped you whether you wanted it or not. I’m so sorry. I should’ve objected when your mother suggested you go home. You were under my protection, and I’ve failed you.” He rested his cheek on my uninjured shoulder.
My body froze under the onslaught of touch, and I gently pushed away from him once I regained my composure. “You couldn’t have stopped him. Besides, I doubt your father likes me much, especially after what mine said to him. I didn’t feel comfortable showing up on your doorstep with his scent on me.”
He ran his hand through his hair again. “My father does like you, but he didn’t appreciate the way William acted. My father isn’t used to disrespect, especially from someone who should know better. But I guess you’re right about one thing. I would’ve lost control and ripped William’s head off—regardless of the consequences. I’m sorry.”
“That doesn’t matter now. What matters is that we keep her safe.” Derek leaned against the wall near a window. He looked serious and solemn.
“What do you suggest?” Brendan asked.
“Take her to a safe place. Not your home, but somewhere you think she’d be protected. My friend was abducted from my home—the vampire who saved you the other night. I have to find him.” His face was grim, and he shifted his weight as if unable to relax.
“Chandra’s also missing,” Brendan said, glancing back at me. “Your father said he sent her to look for you, but she never came home. He suggested that you two were off somewhere together, but as we can see, that’s not true.”
My mouth dropped open. Guilt clenched my gut. She’d protected me from my father, and I’d left her and my mother to his violence. What had I subjected them to? I should’ve done something sooner to return the favor, and now I might be too late. Tears stung my eyes.
Elliot was taken from Derek’s home, and now I knew Chandra was missing. What if the kidnappers had both Elliot and Chandra? It might explain why she’d never gone home. Of course, she could also be tired of the abuse, but with her horrible childhood, she’d told me a few times how she never wanted to go back to being homeless. Ever.
I didn’t want to think of the third option. Maybe my father killed her. No, he’s a monster, but there have to be limits. There have to be.
“I don’t want to go to a safe house. What if my cousin was captured too? I know her, and I don’t think she’d run away. She saved me. She doesn’t deserve to be taken, and I want to help you find Elliot, Derek. He was good to both of us.” I turned to Brendan. “Please...”
Brendan worked his jaw, tightening and loosening the muscles. “Yes, he was. If it weren’t for you two, we might not be here after the incident with the Cazador. I wish there was something I could do to help.” He was such a good guy, but part of that was probably for my sake. I wished I could repay him for his kindness. “I promise I won’t tell my father about you being here, Carmela.” He looked at me then Derek. Sadness crept into his gaze. “I’d like to talk with you alone.”
Derek pushed away from the wall and moved as if to separate Brendan from me. “You should be leaving. She wants to stay here.”
“Derek, don’t. Please go upstairs and don’t listen in.” I didn’t want to hurt him. He’d been there for me, but I also couldn’t help melting at the pain in Brendan’s eyes. He’d suffered because of me, and I hated that. “Please.”
He glanced between us and narrowed his eyes at Brendan. “Call my name if you need me.”
“I will.” I turned on the couch to face Brendan better, but I didn’t close the space between us. I didn’t feel that comfortable around him yet, even though I knew he wouldn’t hurt me.
Derek’s quiet footsteps faded as he headed up the stairs.
Brendan returned his gaze to my face. “I know there’s something going on between you and him. While I’m not sure why you’re interested in him, I know you felt something for me, just as I do for you.” He put his forearms on his knees and leaned a little closer. “You’re more to me than an arranged relationship. I worried so much when I couldn’t reach you. Did I say something wrong? I knew I shouldn’t have let you leave. I should have stopped you, but...” He lowered his gaze, his face twisting with emotion. “But I had no idea William was the kind of man to try something like that. I’m sorry, babe. I let you down, but I can’t let you slip away from me. That would be my biggest regret.”
The tears hanging in my eyes slid down my cheeks. I’d been wrong about him.
His eyes watered too, but he kept the moisture from falling. “Say something. Please.”
I scooted closer to him and wrapped my arms around his chest. He held me lightly, as if unsure what to do. “I care about you too.”
“If you mate with me, I can protect you. He won’t be able to hurt you again.” He hugged me a little tighter. The warmth of his affection relaxed me a little, even if the words stirred up panic.
Movement on the balcony overlooking the living room caught my attention. Derek slipped back into the shadows, but I’d seen his stoic expression.
I cared for both men. What was I supposed to do?
Chapter 41
Brendan
I COULDN’T SUPPRESS my relief that Carmela hadn’t fled to Derek because she hated me. But I still seethed with anger that her father had almost raped her. If I’d known things would get so bad, I could’ve done something to prevent her pain... Maybe I should’ve pressed to visit her sooner, or talked my father into bumping up the mating ritual. No, I couldn’t second-guess myself. What William did wasn’t normal. You didn’t expect your future mate’s father to do something like that.
“M-mate? S-so soon?” Carmela met my gaze with slivers of panic in her eyes.
Damn. The last thing I wanted to do was scare her. My words had just slipped out in my desperation to draw her close, although I meant them from the bottom of my heart. What if they drove her away from me? I’d been unable to protect her before due to our customs, but now I could change that. My father was the Alpha of Alphas. He could ensure her safety and bring William to justice once we were mated.
The only other thing that bothered me was how she looked at Derek.
“The sooner the better, babe.” Glancing up at the balcony, I caught Derek watching us from the shadows. He wasn’t trying very hard to conceal himself. Emotions warred within me. She was my future mate, but the two of them seemed to have feelings for one another. I was grateful that Derek watched over her while I was injured and at home, but I couldn’t let him take her from me. I was falling in love with her.
She chewed on her lower lip. Memories of our kiss shoved all other thoughts aside. The only thing that kept me from leaning in to claim her mouth again was the worry in her eyes. I brushed a strand of hair from her cheek, tucking it behind her ear. She leaned into my palm.
“I—”
“You don’t have to make that decision right now, love.” Derek walked toward us, stopping mere feet away, and much closer than I’d have preferred.
Every muscle in my body tensed. “She was going to say something. Let her speak.” The hair on the back of my neck rose, and a low growl trickled up from my chest. I must’ve been so caught up in being close to Carmela that I hadn’t remained aware of our surroundings. Vampires were stealthy, but I was the Alpha of Alphas’ son; my keen senses were sharpened from an early age. He shouldn’t have been able to sneak up on me.
She placed a small hand against my chest. “It’s okay, Brendan.” She leaned up and brushed her soft lips against mine.
I gently cupped her cheeks, not wanting just a chaste peck. After everything that had happened, I needed more than that. I needed her. Her hands covered mine, and she softly moaned as I swiped my tongue over her lower lip.
Derek cleared his throat. “As I said before, you should be going.” His power surged toward us in a hot wave.
Carmela tried to turn to look at him, but I kept her gaze on me. “I can protect you. Just say yes.” My wolf wanted to rip the vampire’s throat out, regardless of the help he and his friend had provided us. That would resolve some of my problems, but it went against the kind of man I was. Besides, he’d taken care of Carmela when I could not. Regret twisted my stomach in knots.
Derek took a couple steps closer. “You had your chance to talk with her. Leave us.”
I grabbed the crutch from beside me and stood. Our eyes met, and I felt the soft tug of his power as he tried to mess with my mind. Even though I was injured, I wouldn’t put up with this. He might have feelings for her, but she was a werewolf, and my destined mate.
“Guys, please.” Carmela looked between us and sighed. “I need to talk with you both.”
Chapter 42
Carmela
I WAVED TO the couch on either side of me, but the men’s eyes were locked on one another. It was as if I didn’t exist. I rubbed my hands over my face, but the familiar caress of power wafting off Derek caught my attention.
Brendan swayed on his feet for half a second; then he jerked forward as if he were a puppet on strings. He tackled Derek to the ground, and I leapt to my feet, stunned at what was happening. While I didn’t doubt Brendan was swift and agile, he’d moved very fast considering his current condition. He straddled Derek and cocked back his fist.
I leapt over the coffee table and grabbed Brendan’s arm. He started to turn his head, but suddenly we were both flying. I groaned as my body hit the soft couch cushions. A loud thud caught my attention as Brendan slammed into the opposite wall.
Derek looked between us before glaring at Brendan. He rushed to my side. “Love, lay back. Let me check you out.” He lowered his voice a little, as if Brendan couldn’t hear us.
I clenched both of my hands into fists, even though it hurt my right arm. “I’m fine.” I pushed into a sitting position. “If you two are done trying to kill each other, I really need to talk with you both.” While I cared about Brendan, I also felt deeply for Derek. I couldn’t push one away for the other. After everything that had happened recently, I knew without a doubt that I was safest with both of them. I just hoped they’d understand, and not push me away because of my feelings.
Pain tightened Brendan’s eyes. He pushed up on his elbows, but didn’t make any move to join us on the sofa. His leg. I couldn’t just watch him lay there in discomfort.
“Derek, help me get him to the couch.” I knelt by Brendan’s side and looked up to see Derek lingering a few feet away from us. I shook my head. “You two need to understand something. I care about you both.” I sat beside Brendan. “I’m still trying to regain my strength, and we need to search for Chandra and Elliot. They could be dead for all we know. Now I have to sit here and watch you guys fight over me.”
Derek closed the distance between us and sat beside me. “What do you expect us to do? Share you?” He looked tired and exasperated.
“Yes.” I winced as they both objected at the same time, nearly shouting each other down. I could barely hear either of them. This was exactly the kind of reaction I figured I’d get.
“Come on,” I said, but my voice was lost in their arguing. I jerked to my feet and glared down at them both, my frustration overwhelming my desire to avoid conflict. “Stop it!”
They quieted down but stared at me with such an intensity that the hackles on the back of my neck rose. My wolf pushed to the surface, and my teeth lengthened into fangs as fur lined my skin. If I didn’t get ahold of myself, I’d shift.
Suddenly having their attention didn’t feel so good anymore, but they boxed me in: Brendan on the floor in front of me and Derek at my side, with the wall at my back.
Closing my eyes, I took a few deep breaths, trying to regain control. When I opened them, they were still watching me.
“While that—” Derek spoke as Brendan said, “The wolves—” They shifted their glares to one another. Maybe this was a preview of what being in a relationship with both of them might be like—entirely frustrating.
“Brendan, go ahead since you started talking first, then Derek will speak.” I toyed with the fabric on my splint. Think of the positive. They’re not killing each other. I chewed on my lower lip as I saw the openly hostile look Derek gave Brendan. Hopefully that good luck would last.
“I don’t think you’ve thought this through. The wolves would never agree to something like that. I couldn’t agree to that either. It’d be putting both of us in danger.” He looked at Derek. “All of us.”
“My kindred wouldn’t accept that either, and I wouldn’t be able to coexist with another man in your bed, let alone in your life.” Annoyance marred his pale face.
Butterflies fluttered in my stomach. I’d hoped Derek would be agreeable, but I was wrong. Of course, they had valid points. No one said this would be easy, just as being with Derek alone would require sacrifice. But if we wanted each other badly enough, we could figure out a way, couldn’t we?
Disgusted with the conversation, I stepped over Brendan, needing some distance. Ugh.
“Carmela?” Brendan said. When I didn’t respond, Derek called my name as well, but I ignored them both, heading upstairs. “Wait. Come back here.” No way. I took a few more steps. “Fine. Maybe we should talk about this.” I stopped halfway up and turned to them. Brendan cleared his throat. “Right, Derek?”
I glanced Derek’s way.
He still looked grumpy, but his face was more stoic than Brendan’s, and harder to read. “Yes, we’ll talk about the relationship.” He paused. “Still, it’s not wise for Brendan to be here for an extended period of time. I’m sure there will be those out looking for him.”
Brendan nodded. “Unfortunately he’s right. My dad might send out a search party if I’m gone too long. They wouldn’t have to go far from your house to find me. Maybe you should come with me to a werewolf safe house.”
My father was well connected. The idea of being around a lot of werewolves nauseated me. “I can’t. My father knows where a lot of them are, and even if he doesn’t, other werewolves might talk.”
Wincing, he pushed into a sitting position. “There are a couple only my family knows about. They’re meant to house my father if there’s ever an emergency where he isn’t safe.”
I closed the distance between us as Brendan slowly got to his feet. “I...I’m sorry,” I said, looking into his eyes, then glancing back at Derek. “I just don’t feel comfortable with that idea.”
“I won’t force you to go.” Brendan gave me a quick kiss on the top of my head, surprising me. He looked like he wanted to say more but was afraid of how I’d react. “Take care of her, Derek.”
“I will. When you return tomorrow, use the back door. It’s less conspicuous.” At my surprise, Derek shrugged. “I’m not awake during the day, and I’d like to know you’re protected while I sleep.” He walked with us into the den. “When he comes back, we’ll talk this over. Your wolf is right that mating with him will keep you safe. You two should consummate the relationship.” His lip curled a little in disgust, but he opened the door.
I widened my eyes at him, then turned my stunned gaze to Brendan. I couldn’t believe Derek had said that. Without another word, I retreated upstairs to my room.
Chapter 43
Derek
BRENDAN LOOKED BETWEEN me and Carmela’s retreating back, looking almost as stunned as she did. Then he dipped his head and limped out the door.
Maybe that had been the wrong thing to say, but I didn’t understand their surprised reactions. It wasn’t as if I liked the idea of them being intimate; I couldn’t hold her back from who she was, though. I’d been here to help her heal and rest while she was injured, but now there were problems beyond any of us. We needed to keep her safe from her father and to find Elliot and her cousin.
I closed the door behind me and leaned on it. A blast of wild power and the grotesque sound of Carmela’s transformation drew me up the stairs, but I didn’t dare get too close before she completed her change. I’d seen her near-shift earlier, and I regretted the pain and stress she was going through. This wasn’t easy on any of us, least of all her.
When things quieted down, I took a few more steps toward the door. The soft thump of her hopping off the bed prompted me to knock. I needed to make sure she was all right. It was good for her wound that she’d shifted, but I worried about her.
