Without Limits: A BWWM Collection of Passion and Desire, page 74
My heart raced as my brain spiraled out of control.
What was I doing? What was I thinking? Throwing it all away, my life, my friends, and my education to go on the run with my kidnapper.
A weird laugh escaped my lips.
I squeezed my eyes shut. No. That wasn’t the answer either.
I shook my head and dropped the scissors in the sink. I bent over and rested my head on the cold white tile.
I loved Conor.
With every fiber being, I knew it was true, but I loved my life too.
Maybe he didn’t see himself in my life. Would he stay home while I went to class? Or, would he be on assignment during the day, or worse, going to places and countries without me.
We could get together a couple of times of month and do what. Play Daddy’s Little Girl until he had to go off on another job or I had to go back to my real life.
He wouldn’t give up his life for me. He loved it too much. Protecting people.
This life wasn’t for me. The danger, guns and running from people wanting to kill you, no way of life for anyone.
I stood back up.
I loved him, though and I knew he loved me, too. I felt it in my bones and most of all, in my heart. We had to figure out a way to keep him out of jail and how keep us together.
We needed to remove everyone and everything from the equation and find out how to keep both of us safe. We’ll figure it out together.
I picked up the scissors and continued to cut the weave out of my hair. When it was out, I removed my hair from the cornrows. My hair was about two to four inches long. It stuck out straight all over my head.
I pulled open the cabinet under the sink and found a pair of clippers. I plugged them in and proceeded to cut off the rest of my hair.
I had a newfound understanding for Brittany Spears, Solange Knowles, and Tamar Braxton. When a woman needs a new start, they started with the hair.
I stepped into the shower and washed and conditioned my hair, I left a little on top. My natural curl pattern resulted in a little wave. I jumped out and dried off. I added some mousse and finger combed it.
I ran my hand over the close-cropped hair on the side and in the back. I dropped my hands and stared at myself in the mirror.
I looked so different. So grown up. Not a little girl any more. Certainly not Conor’s little girl.
I relaxed my shoulders and held my head up high.
Playtime was over.
I removed the clothes Conor had dressed me in and put on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. I slid my feet into a pair of boots.
I went to find Conor and talk him out his stupid idea before he got himself killed.
The guys were no longer in the command center. I followed the heated discussion a floor down. I descended the narrow stairs and pushed open the door to the galley. The guys stood in a circle. Will and Carter were spooning ice cream out of a big tub.
My mouth watered.
I stepped in the galley and all eyes turned in my direction.
I ran my hand over the back of my shaved head.
Will and Carter paused with spoons full of ice cream. Sam stopped talking. Conor’s back was toward me. He instinctively put his hand on the gun in his lower back and turned around.
“Conor, we have to —”
“Mika.” He yelled. His hand remained on his lower back as he stepped towards me. “Get your ass back upstairs.” He spit through his clenched jaw.
“Co—”
“Now!” he yelled in my face. Tears sprang in my eyes.
I blinked them away.
I backed out of the room. The look on Conor’s face was new. While full of rage, something about the way he looked at me made my core clinch.
I turned and ran up the stairs.
“Conor, man calm —”
“Don’t.” I heard Conor yell at his brother.
I stumbled into the room and slammed the door.
The world went silent.
It didn’t stay silent for long.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Conor
My tone may have confused Mika.
“Dude. Calm down.”
I pushed Carter out of the way. As if Mika needed protection from me. When I saw her, the real her standing in front of me, something in my heart snapped followed by my brain. The fucked up situation we found ourselves in, allowed her to peel back so many layers and reveal herself, not to me, but to herself as well.
I took the steps three at a time.
I barreled into the room. Mika stood in front of the bed, her arms wrapped around her waist.
I stalked toward her.
She held her hands up.
I reached out, ran my hands over her close cropped new hair do. The tingling in my palms connected with my dick. I groaned and pulled her face to mine and kissed it. My lips drew hers in my mouth. I kissed her hard as she clung to me, her fingernails dug into my arms.
I lifted her and we fell on to the bed.
I released her lips.
She gasped and sucked in oxygen.
I wasted no time removing her t-shirt and pushing her jeans down her hips. I didn’t need them all the way off, but low enough for me to see her. I crawled up on my knees and folded Mika in half and dove on her pussy. Sucked her clit in my mouth.
“Conor.” Mika cried out.
I ran my tongue up and down her slit. She was so wet and sweet. I licked every surface. I pump one finger into her and coated my finger with her juices. I ran my finger down to her asshole and pressed the tip of my finger in while sucking on her clit.
Mika bucked underneath me. I had to hold her down tight, her legs trapped in her jeans. I pushed her legs to her side, so her ass sat up for me. I pushed my fingers in further.
She tried to scoot away from me. I looked up at her. She had her eyes on me. Moans and groans spilled through her lips as she barred down.
I rubbed her clit with my thumb and laid feathery kisses on her pussy lips. She rocked back on my finger, exhaled and opened for me. I pushed my finger in further.
“That’s it Mika.” I kissed her pussy. “Let me in.”
“Oh god.” She groaned.
I pushed in deeper, pulled out and pushed in again. She rocked back to meet my finger as it invaded her backside. I used my free hand to unbutton my jeans and pulled my cock out. I stroked it a few times. I was rock hard the minute I saw her and her new look. I stroked it to calm it down. I was afraid of blowing my load before I had to chance to fuck her.
I really wanted to fuck her.
I lined up with the entrance of her pussy, and slammed in as I pushed two fingers in her ass.
She screamed and twitched and came in an instant. Her pussy and ass clamped down on my intrusion. She shook violently and bucked against me. I rode out her orgasm and tried not to come.
She settled a little.
I pulled out and slammed back into her. I ran my free hand over her head and grabbed the little length of hair she left on the top. I tilted her head up.
I dropped down on her and kissed her. I pushed my tongue in her mouth. My tongue fucked her like my cock and my fingers. All pushed her over the edge again in minutes.
She stared in my eyes as if asking so many questions. I wasn’t sure if I had the answers. The one thing I did know was I loved this woman with all my heart and I was going to keep her safe and alive for the most selfish reason in the world.
So I can have her for myself.
She was mine. Every part of her.
I removed my fingers form her ass and concentrated on fucking my woman. My Mika.
I peeled her jeans off and crawled between her legs. I had to get inside of her again. It’s where I felt most at home.
I entered her slow. Her mouth made the cutest little noise when I slid into her all the way. I pushed as far as I could and ran my hand over her head again. I kept up a steady rhythm with my hips. Mika meet each thrust.
I usually spoke dirty to her while I fucked her, but we didn't’ need words today. I needed Mika to feel. To feel me.
I studied her face.
The way her big brown eyes danced when I bottomed out in her. The twitch of her lip as I rubbed her insides the right way.
She let out a breathy little whimper with each thrust.
The sounds she made caused my cock to twitch.
She flinched and squeezed me.
I made me push harder and faster.
In and out.
Push and pull.
I kissed the side of her head. Ran my lips over the course curls. I slid my hands down her side and underneath her ass to pull her closer. I pounded into her with such force, I was sure I’d break her.
Mika grabbed onto me, her arms locked around my neck, riding out the punishment I inflicted on both of us.
I pounded into her and held myself there as my cock twitched and I unloaded my heart, my soul, and my life into her body. She took it all and gave me hers right back.
It was too much and more than enough.
As I ran my hands back up her body, I leaned on my side and brought Mika with me. I ran my fingers along her face and up into her hair. I grabbed the top and shook it a little before sliding down and cupping the back of her head.
I brought her face towards mine and gently kissed her on the lips.
I laid my head down on her pillow.
We stared into each other’s eyes.
Mika touched my check and ran her fingertips over my lips. I kissed them as they skirted by, one by one. She leaned in and kissed me.
I pulled away from the kiss and grabbed the top of her head again.
I had one question for her.
“Why?”
Chapter Twenty-Six
Mika
I turned away from him.
He yanked me back towards him, flush with his chest. Conor ran a hand over my face as if giving me a chance to think about my answer. He expected an answer.
“I was tired of not recognizing myself when I looked in the mirror.” I blinked back tears. It was the best answer I could come up with. “Ever since I met you, I haven’t recognized me.”
Conor’s eyes scrunched together.
“That’s not a bad thing.” I looked down.
“It doesn’t sound good.”
“It just is.” I sat up and gathered a blanket around me. “I met you. I loved and hated you from the start.”
Conor chuckled.
“That’s fucked up.”
He narrowed his eyes, but didn’t reprimand me for it.
“You told me what happens to woman like me on this god forsaken continent.” I leaned forward. “Is that how you see me?”
Conor sat up.
So much for the power position.
“No. Fuck no.” Conor caressed my face. “I see you as a beautiful and intelligent woman.”
“You see me as a little immature brat who needs to be spanked.”
“Mika,” He rubbed his face. “Our …” he paused and exhaled. “When we play, that has nothing to do with me thinking you need an authority figure in your life or that you need to be put in your place. It’s not how it works.”
I closed my eyes.
“Mika. Look at me.”
My eyes popped open.
“I love you.” Conor scooted closer. “I want you. A life with you.”
I licked my lips, blinked and looked down at my hands. My thoughts spun out of control. A chill ran up my spine. I pulled the blanket up around me tighter.
“You have nothing to say about that?” Conor’s gruff voice made me jump.
“What do you want me to say?” I looked around the room, everywhere but at Conor.
“Mika.” He whispered.
The tone in his voice gutted me. He didn’t understand my silence. Him saying those things were all I wanted to hear, all I needed to hear. I couldn’t say it back. Not yet.
Not when he was leaving me.
I scooted to the end of the bed and stood up. It took Conor three seconds to block my path.
He stared down at me.
I stared up at him.
“Talk to me.” He said.
I couldn’t stop the tears now.
“Don’t say those things to me.” I said.
“Mika I mean it. I love you.”
“No. Don’t.”
He grabbed my hips and pulled me toward him.
I pushed away from him.
“No.” I backed away. “You don’t get to say it. Not now.”
“Mika.” He held his hands open. “I don’t know what you want from me.”
I ran up on him.
“Don’t leave me.” I stood on my toes. “Don’t go through with this stupid plan. We can go somewhere. Leave the country. Change our identities. What ever we have to do as long as we stay together. If you love me, then stay with me.”
“It’s not that simple.”
“Fuck you Conor.” I waved my hands. “Of course it’s not simple. Nothing is simple.”
Conor sat on the edge of the bed.
I got in his face.
“In the last thirty six hours, I’ve been pulled out of van, kidnapped, threatened with knives and guns, and been molested. I stood next to a man as your bullet” I poked Conor on the chest, “entered his head and he crumbled to the ground next to me. I find out my father is trying to have me killed and I’ve even killed someone to save you.” My voice raised as I spouted off all that had happened. “So what does it tell you that after all of that, the thought of you leaving me is messing with my brain the most?”
“It tells me you love me, too.” Conor smirked.
The rage inside me dissipated and I lost all feeling in my limbs. I melted into the ground.
Conor caught me. He pulled me into his arms and held me tight.
We held each other.
My heart raced.
Conor wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my head.
He took long deep breaths to get me to calm down.
I breathed with him, quickly picking up on the rhythm of his beating heart.
“I love you, Daddy,” I whispered into his chest.
“I know baby girl.” He squeezed me before grabbing my face. “I won’t leave you.”
“You promise.” My heart raced.
“I promise.” He kissed me, gentle and slow. "We are going to have an amazing life together. No more kidnapping, no more killing. You and me forever, remember?"
I wrapped my arms around his neck and shifted in his lap.
He pulled my arms back.
“And, just for the record. You didn’t kill anyone.” Conor pressed his head to my forehead.
I pulled back.
“The guy on the beach.” I held my hand up. “He was going to shoot you, so I shot him.”
“You pulled the trigger, but you didn’t even nick him.” Conor lifted me in his arms. “I appreciated that you didn’t hesitate. You distracted him for me, but next time you shoot someone, keep your eyes open.”
I giggled.
Conor chuckled as he laid me down on the bed and sat next to me.
“What’s going to happen now?” I asked.
"Trust me. I'll do what's best for us." Conor said.
"I can help."
“Now, you’re going to get some sleep, little girl.” Conor kissed my forehead. “When you wake up. It will be all better.”
“It’s better now.” I leaned up.
Conor pushed me back down.
“Don’t make me punish you for disobeying.” Conor gave me his stern look, but it had the love and affection behind it.
“I like when Daddy punishes me.” I relaxed into the plush pillows. “It let’s me know he loves me.”
“You are so strong and so brave.” He ran a hand through my closed cropped hair. “You’re my woman and my little girl. You know that, right?”
I nodded.
His words spoke straight to my heart, affirming what I felt in my soul.
“No matter what happens …” Conor kissed me again. His devotion flowed from that kiss. His love poured into me, filling me. He broke of the kiss. “I will always be with you.”
He laid several small kisses on my face as if he was memorizing it.
“I love you, Mika.” He whispered as I drifted off to sleep.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Conor
I watched Mika sleep for a bit. I wore her out.
I leaned over and kissed her cheek. She stirred in her sleep, pressing into the contact.
I shuffled into the bathroom, showered, and put on a clean set of clothes. I slipped out the door without looking at her. If I did, I wasn’t sure I could do what I was about to do. I shut the door behind me.
“She’s loud for a little thing.” Carter strutted down the hall.
“You were listening to us?”
“Not the sex part.” Carter shivered. “No, the her chewing your ass out for doing something so stupid.” He pushed his hair out of face. “Glad she talked some sense into you. This plan is a fucked …”
I pushed past Carter and headed towards the command center.
Will had packed a couple of duffle bags. Sam typed away at the computer, spreadsheets blinked on the screen. He plugged in an iPad and tapped the screen, unplugged it. He turned it off and handed it to me.
I placed it in the closest duffel.
“You all set with security on Mika?” I asked Sam.
“I will be before she gets back.”
“You understand. I want every fucking internet and news outlet there for her homecoming.” I rubbed my chin. “It will buy us some time. I hope they won't come after until the attention dies down."
“Got it.” Sam said.
“See if she’ll stay at the penthouse, but if not, you put her in a hotel until you’re finished wiring her place. I want two men on her 24/7.”
“I won’t let anything happen to her.” Sam stood. We shook hands and hugged.
“We’re all set.” I said.
I grabbed one bag. Will grabbed the other.
