Dimmed Lights, page 4
part #3 of On Stage Trilogy Series
I shook my head. I didn’t have to decide yet. Tae had also said so. My plan was to go to the meeting and decide later. There was also the possible settlement and trial to think about. Not to even mention Joe—I seriously needed to get rid of him. Maybe I could convince Tae I didn’t need anyone staying with me.
When I remembered Joe existed at all, I added a task to the morning. “6:40, morning run.”
Let’s see if the dog can keep up. I wondered if he had his schedule synced with mine already. I doubted it was. I wished it wasn’t. I needed some kind of an advantage over him. Especially after this morning. Ugh.
In my sudden productivity spurt, I made an appointment for a haircut and dye as well. As I was on a roll, I might’ve as well squeezed in a visit to our old dorms to get myself some more clothes too—not that I had ruined half of my current clothes by attempting to use the washing machine or anything—but it was good to have options.
All in all, my schedule, which I had ignored, had been pretty much empty for a month. Now it looked almost as familiarly packed as before, at least for tomorrow. Granted, the tasks weren’t usually so miscellaneous, but it was a start. I mean, I still wasn’t sure I was doing this whole “getting back to work thing” in the first place, but it couldn’t hurt to get myself back in somewhat of a semi-presentable shape.
Then came the most dreaded thing I needed to get done: going through the missed calls. As anticipated, the first half of the 382 calls were mostly from the other GRiD members; particularly from Joonie. The latter half was more varied, and the most persistent of them all had been my mom and Hana—my sister.
Whatever came to Mom and her countless calls, I wasn’t in the mood to deal with that early in the morning. Instead, I texted her: Calm down, I’ll call you later.
Unfortunately, I didn’t realize she would be sitting by her phone, but that did come quite clear when the phone started buzzing with “Mom” flashing on the screen almost instantly after I hit “send.” Ugh. If there was one thing to be said of her, it was that Cho Da-hee was a force to be reckoned with.
Grunting, I hit the green icon and lifted the phone up to my ear. “Hi Mom.”
“Don’t you dare to ‘Hi Mom’ me! First, you’re involved in a car crash and then you're getting arrested! You’re coming home this instant, young man–”
Her high pitched yelling hurt my ear, so I cut her off with a sigh.
“Really, Mom? I don’t have time to come home, we’re going to the Billboards next—” I slapped my forehead, cutting myself off. Didn’t I just conclude I still wasn’t sure about this getting back to work business? “Anyway, everything’s fine now and—”
“Fine? Have you lost it for good? Do you even have the slightest idea how worried…”
I tuned out for the rest of her rant, despite the fact that I totally deserved it. Frankly, I was surprised that she hadn’t flown all the way here to nag at me for not picking up the phone and explaining the shit I had gotten myself into.
While Mom continued to yap on and on, my eyes wandered to the window. That’s when Joe appeared in the yard wearing a tracksuit and starting to stretch, which took me a little off-guard.
Huh. Looked like he really had his calendar synced with mine already.
“Look, I gotta go,” I said to Mom, apparently cutting her off again.
“Sure,” she huffed, stretching her voice which clearly told me she was annoyed. “But please come visit home as soon as possible.”
“Yeah, yeah. Maybe over the next break. Call you later,” I mumbled and ended the call, glancing at the clock.
It was 6:35 already.
Jumping up, I gulped the rest of the coffee down before throwing the mug in the dishwasher. Then I darted to the entrance hallway, picked up random sneakers, yanked them on, and briefly stretched inside to avoid any unnecessary socializing with Joe.
I was, after all, on a mission to ignore him completely. Thus, when I was ready, I dashed right past him to the front gate. He hollered “good morning,” but I downright refused to reply.
Regardless of how many mornings I had repeated this exact same routine with Mr. Won, I had never been more aware of the footsteps following me as I was now. But when we reached the end of the road, I couldn’t stop a wide grin from tugging my lips up—it was time to pick up the speed.
My feet were lighter than ever before when I darted straight into the forest. As I forced my legs to work faster and faster, the adrenaline started to rush in my veins. My mood brightened for the tiniest bit. Well—okay—by a lot.
But like everything else in my life, that didn’t last long either. Instead, my annoyance levels rose off the charts soon enough when Joe kept up relatively well. Who knew he had stamina too? Or the agility to keep up through the narrow, zigzagging trail? The fact that he was essentially a full-course meal; the eyes would be the appetizer, the main course was a big pile of muscles with a huge portion of sex appeal on the side and those hands of him promised a sweet dessert, should’ve worked against him. Who let him be this perfect in everything?
Annoyed at myself and my own thoughts, I pushed my body past all possible limits and ran through the forest as fast as I could force my legs to move, following up the curvy, difficult trail. Somehow, it turned into a race, at least in my mind.
But although I reached the clearing with the view deck first, it didn’t feel like a victory. Not when my lungs burned like they were literally on fire. I dropped to sit near the edge of the deck like a sack of potatoes, so spent my legs were shaking.
Joe sat right next to me. I was too exhausted to care.
“Damn you’re fast,” he huffed, as out of breath as I was.
I was too tired to remember to keep ignoring him.
“You’re not too slow either. I’m surprised you can keep up,” I panted as a reply. At least he was as winded as me.
“Ha, I’ll beat you in a heartbeat next time. Now I know the way,” he said, confidence oozing out of him. How unfair. His breath also evened out in a record time and my annoyance made a comeback. Was I getting out of shape? Leaning back on his hands, he continued, “To be fair, you’re such a shortie that you have stepped three steps while I’m still taking the first one.”
Hmph. “Keep on dreaming.”
“Wanna bet? If I’m back through your gate first, I get the guest room. Mr. Won said there is one so don’t try to bullshit me.”
“Yeah? Then what’s in it for me?” I asked, a grin making its way on my face. There was nothing he could’ve offered me that I needed. I already had everything one could ever dream of. Money, house, looks if not counting the scar…and that one he couldn’t fix. Even the best plastic surgeons in the whole country hadn’t given me hope. And that’s saying something, we’re kind of famous around these parts of the world because the plastic surgeons can work miracles. Apparently my scars were beyond repairing.
“Well…I heard you’re not much of a cook, so I believe me cooking breakfast for a week would suffice— hey!” Joe offered, though I was already on my feet and darting back the same way we came in as soon as I heard the word “breakfast.”
What? I missed a good breakfast. Hadn’t had one after…everything. I was more than sick of the same old half-burned, half-runny eggs that I barely managed to muster up every morning with various levels of success. So, I gave myself a head start and ran down the trail.
Unfortunately, about half-way through, Joe started gaining on me. Rapidly. It might’ve been playing a bit dirty, but I took a couple of shortcuts through the bushes, the branches scraping my arms. It didn’t help much, though, and soon Joe was right behind me. Of course, I panicked and resorted to even dirtier tactics. I knew I didn’t have the slightest chance against him on even terrain, because he was that much taller than me. Hence, my only solution was to try and trip him.
He guessed it though and hopped over my extended foot like no big deal. Grinning. Damn, he must’ve wanted that guestroom bad, based on the speed he dashed forward right after.
I darted after him like my ass was on fire, but it wasn’t enough. As predicted, when we hit the road I had no chance whatsoever. But damn me if I didn’t put up a fight nevertheless. I ended up being only a step behind when he ran through the gate as a winner.
Both breathless, we sat down on the damp, cold, barely spring-green grass. I was so exhausted I didn’t even try to sit properly. Instead, I fell down, my back hitting the ground. A light thud beside me told Joe ended up doing the same.
“Would you look at that, this old dog beat your fine ass.”
I fisted a bunch of grass and threw it on Joe’s annoyingly handsome, grinning face. Instantly he tried to take revenge, but I easily dodged it, the grass flying past my shoulder. Realizing I was too fast for him, he tried to pin me down. He wasn’t very serious, I figured, as I easily yielded that too by rolling out of his reach and stood up.
Joe was great at pissing me off, I gave him that.
“Bring it on,” I said. “You might’ve earned the guestroom, but I still want that breakfast.”
“Shortie, you might be good at fighting, but don’t get cocky…have you forgotten I have years of experience on you,” he countered, towering over me with an amused expression.
Again, with the fucking Shortie. Ignoring him and his bullshit, I took a swing at him. He countered with ease, grabbing my wrist. As I had seen that coming, I managed to land a hit straight to his abdomen. It was rock hard under the grey t-shirt and Joe barely even flinched.
Only for a split second I was distracted by his firm fucking abs, much to my dismay, and of course Joe took advantage of it. Twisting my wrist, he spun me around and locked me tight against his body, his breath tickling my ear when he whispered, “Remember what happened last time…”
Ah, last time. Heat rushed to my face upon the flashbacks from said last time that took over my mind. Aish, he was good. In both regards—last time and throwing me off my game this time. It didn’t matter how much I struggled against him, he had me in such a tight hold; my back against his chest and his huge arms locking my arms and basically whole upper body.
I tapped whatever part of him I could reach out to, in a sign of surrender.
“Looks like the old man is also driving the beautiful Lamborghini I found at your garage,” Joe stated while letting me go.
As if I’d let him drive my beauty.
“You ain’t touching my car,” I said and attacked again.
Almost too easily, I had him on the ground instead, my thighs wrapped around his throat, blocking his airways. Even though he had many ways to escape that hold, he tapped the ground. It felt like he let me win. It didn’t feel like a victory. Nonetheless, I let him go.
“Okay I’ll let you have that one. I’m too tired for this so early in the morning,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck.
Yeah. He’d definitely let me win. It left a sour taste in my mouth, but as I was also just as spent as he was, I let it go. “Alright. I’ve earned at least one breakfast, right?”
“Right,” he said, brushing his clothes as we both stood up.
I wasn’t taking the risk of not getting edible breakfast, so I led him straight to the guest room upstairs. My plan was to exit as fast as I could, trying not to think about the fact that now he would be staying right beside my bedroom. But as soon as Joe spotted the adjoining bathroom, he discarded his sweaty shirt, right then and there.
My brain stopped working.
He was already heading to the shower when my brain untangled itself, and I scurried off like I was on fire. But it was too late…I had already caught a glimpse of his more than chiseled back muscles, and the large, old, faint scar that reached all the way from his right shoulder to his left hip.
One might think I’d be curious about how he had gotten that scar. But my non-functioning brain had some entirely different views on the matter… I couldn’t help but wonder how well it suited his character.
For fuck’s sake, why do scars make anyone else hotter, but me? Could that guy be any more perfect? It was already unfair that he had been faster than me this morning, and most likely a better fighter too. Heading to my own bathroom, I made it my goal to beat the guy’s ass one of these days.
Job Description
I fell while chasing him. Him? Something. I was chasing something.
Somebody?
Debris flew all around me, as I staggered up from the hard asphalt. Everything spun. There was a black fog, weighing me down and making me drop down to my knees, but I fought against it. It was all in vain. The fog just made me drop down over and over again. The air around me crushed my lungs and made my saliva taste rusty and metallic.
I coughed up blood.
Crawling was the answer. I had to crawl to move forward, but the road was endless. Where was I even going? My right hand knuckles were bloody, raw, and tender. The tangy smell of burnt rubber lingered everywhere. My throat burned.
I just wanted everything to stop. Why was the world spinning?
What was I even chasing? The air around me was heavier and heavier. It became almost impossible to breathe. My arms were next to useless, I managed to move only a centimeter at a time. I couldn’t reach it…him…whatever I was chasing.
I stopped and let the heavy fog settle around me. I hoped it would’ve just ended me painlessly, but of course it had to burn. Every breath was like swallowing a thousand scorching hot needles. Yet, I couldn’t fight it. There was no point.
With a heavy sigh, I rolled to my side. But there was something there next to me. Somebody, to be exact. I turned to look and was met with a heavy breathing man, his face all deformed, bruised, and smashed in. It was ruined beyond recognition. Who could’ve done this to him?
As if reading my mind, the man smiled, blood gushing out of his mouth coloring his teeth crimson. “You did this to me.”
A manic laugh erupting from his chest, the man reached for my throat.
I jumped up to sit in my bed. Gasping for air, choking, and coughing my lungs out, I tried to scratch the man’s hands off my throat, but they weren’t there anymore. The man wasn’t there anymore. I wasn’t even outside anymore; I was in my bedroom. Why I still couldn’t fucking breathe, I wasn’t sure. It was also way, way too hot. Sweat soaked through my clothes, leaving me drenched.
Then the sweat made me extremely cold. So cold my teeth chattered when I rolled off bed and dropped to my knees on the floor. Crawling on all fours, I barely made it to the bathroom and directly under the shower which was basically the only thing that I knew would help. I didn’t even bother taking off the t-shirt and boxers that I had slept in before turning on the shower.
There I sat on the floor for a good while, clothes on and hot water pounding my back until I could breathe normally again. Until my teeth stopped clacking against each other. Until my racing heart had calmed down.
Eventually, I did wiggle my way out of the drenched clothes, wrung them as dry as I could, and hung them up. I still let the hot water pound my back some more as I tried to keep my mind off the fact that I’d have to face the whole of LBR Entertainment’s headquarters and especially its staff today.
And Joe. Let’s not forget Joe. I wondered if I had woken him up during the night. At least I hadn’t woken up screaming this time. I had tried to fight sleeping in general tonight because just Joe’s mere presence in the room right next to mine had bothered me—I knew I would have nightmares; I did every night these days—but I had lost the fight due to pure exhaustion.
As I had no idea what the time was, I forced myself to turn off the shower and step out. The mirror on top of the sink fogged up as soon as I opened the glass door separating the shower and the rest of the bathroom. Normally, I would’ve been grateful for that, because I wouldn’t have to see my face. That time, however, it wouldn’t do—I needed to see what I was doing if I were to make myself look at least a ghost of what I once was.
Sighing, I toweled myself before using the same towel to clear up a corner of the mirror, just enough to see how bad the situation was.
And man, it was bad.
The fact that there were two prominent, bright-red, barely-healed scars crossing each other on the right side of my face, wasn’t the only problem. On top of those, my hair had also grown out, revealing a two centimeter of black root growth. The rest, that had once been sparkly light brown, had now faded to a much less vivid color that I couldn’t quite put into words, just that it wasn’t very good-looking. Whenever shaving practically blind because the mirror always fogged up, I had missed some spots. There were very prominent bags under my eyes that were a telltale sign that I hadn’t been sleeping much in the past weeks, if at all.
Ah, yes, and then there were the aforementioned scars. One of them from the corner of my eye and ended right above my mouth. The other, slightly thinner scar started between my eyebrows, went down the side of my nose and crossed over the other one on my cheek before fading to my jawline.
Trying my best to avoid the scars, I shaved. There wasn’t really time to be thorough, so it still wasn’t perfect when I was done. Not that it mattered, no-one would notice a stubble here and there with the scars getting all the attention.
After rinsing my face, I quickly blow-dried the mess of my hair and walked over to my walk-in closet, glancing at the clock on my nightstand—at least I wasn’t late. Yet. But I also didn’t have much time to spare.
Only some band t-shirts and some of my simplest black jeans had survived my attempts at doing the laundry. Needless to say, it didn’t take me very long to decide on a Guns ‘n’ Roses t-shirt and some simple, faded black skinny jeans that had lost their elasticity. It was practically the only option left. For a jacket, I grabbed my favorite burgundy faux-leather jacket and headed downstairs.
But once I opened my bedroom door and stepped to the upstairs lounge, an out of this world scent, so delicious, intricate, and warm filled my nostrils. I couldn’t help but stop on my tracks and just…breathe it in. Even my eyes closed on their own as I just wallowed in the warm feeling of home.
