Decker (Sidewinders: Generations Book 5), page 7
We hadn’t been intimate yet, and there was a lot that had to happen before I could tell her my secrets, but she was the first woman I’d ever met that made me want to. No one knew what my life had been like growing up, not even my closest friends on the team. Hell, Decker Reese wasn’t even my legal name. And the only people who knew that were the people in the back office for the Sidewinders. They respected my privacy. Beyond that, Decker Reese was the only name anyone knew.
If I told Eden everything, chances were she’d tell Daisy and Zoe, who would undoubtedly tell Van and Slava. From there, word would get out and while I wasn’t hiding anything criminal, I liked being anonymous and had no intention of changing how I lived my life. I’d broken away from my family and changed my name for a reason.
So before I let Eden in, I had to trust her enough to risk it all.
We weren’t there yet.
She’d promised me a date, though, and I hoped she’d say yes when I brought it up. Hell, maybe she’d say she changed her mind, and I wouldn’t have to worry about it.
Maybe one night would be enough to get her out of my system.
I doubted it, but it was worth a try. Sometimes people just didn’t click beyond the sexual attraction. Once you started talking to them they bored you or whatever. Besides, she was going back to England soon, so maybe this was all moot anyway.
When it was all said and done, she was leaving, and that weighed on me. Was it even worth starting? Trying? Putting in all this mental energy?
“You coming to the house?”
I’d been so lost in thought I hadn’t noticed Van coming up behind me in the dressing room.
“Oh.” I turned. “Yeah. I want to check on Eden, and weren’t we going to order dinner since she’s not up to going out?”
“Yup. She seemed okay this morning, but Daisy texted and said they don’t want to go anywhere.”
“Perfect. I’m going to go home and change before coming over, and we can hang out for a while if you guys don’t mind more company?”
“Of course not.”
“Cool. Then I’ll be over in about an hour.”
“Uh huh.” He grinned and made a goofy face.
“What?” I asked, frowning.
“You like her.”
“You keep saying that, but I don’t know her well enough to know if I like her,” I corrected him. “I think she’s beautiful, and I’d like to take her out, but beyond that, she’s leaving soon, so I don’t know if there’s any point.”
“I can’t believe the consummate bachelor is actually thinking about a woman in terms that don’t include sex.”
“Don’t kid yourself,” I said, closing my locker and digging out my keys. “I am one thousand percent thinking about having sex with her. But only if I think I’ll still want to see her again afterward. Which brings us back to the whole she’s-going-back-to-England thing.”
“I appreciate you taking that into account. Not only because she’s my friend, but because Daisy will have my balls if you hurt her. And then, I assure you, she’ll come after you.”
I laughed. “No worries. I plan to be very careful before things progress in any way beyond friendship.”
That, at least, was the truth.
I went home, showered, and changed, and then stopped at the store before going to Van’s. I bought Eden a bouquet of balloons that said “get well soon,” as well as a box of Lindt chocolates. I didn’t know what she liked, so I got a variety pack, and figured she’d like at least one of the types of chocolate included. It was a small gesture, but I hoped it would make her smile.
For some reason, I was nervous when I got up to the front door. I’d been here at least a dozen times, and Van and I were pretty tight, but this was different. Even though I’d been trying to play it down, like this thing with Eden was no big deal, it kind of was. I was twenty-four and had left home at fifteen. In the nine years I’d been gone, I’d never once met a woman I liked enough to want to be myself with. And while I wasn’t there yet with Eden, I was already considering it, which told me there was something special about her.
“Hey, Decker.” Daisy opened the door smiling. “Come on in. We’re watching the first Avengers movie.”
“One of my favorites,” I said, following her into the house.
“Hey, man.” Van looked up and waved while Zoe said hello.
Eden’s eyes were on the big bunch of balloons in my hand, so I handed them to her. “I thought you might need something to cheer you up,” I said. “And I’ve always believed that chocolate makes everything better.”
“Oh!” Her eyes lit up, and she smiled. “Thank you so much! I’d get up to hug you, but I’m supposed to take it easy.”
“No worries at all.” I sank down on the large sectional next to her. “How are you feeling?”
She lifted one shoulder in a little shrug. “Not great, not terrible. Still in a bit of pain, but I don’t want to take the painkillers. They make me loopy.”
“When you see the doc tomorrow, hopefully he can recommend something that will help.”
“I hope so.”
“We’re going to order Italian,” Van said, tossing a menu at me. “Let me know what you want, and I’ll order in about an hour.”
“Nah, this is on me,” I said. “I owe you guys for helping out at the house the other night.”
“How’s that going?” Eden asked. “Are you going to have to redo the floors?”
I grimaced as I nodded. “Makes me glad I don’t own the place. It’s going to be expensive, and they can’t even get us on the schedule until mid-January. Anton might have to replace the dishwasher because it hasn’t worked since the flood.”
“Oh, man.” Daisy shook her head. “That sucks.”
“Luckily, we’re leaving on a road trip the day before they’re supposed to get things going, so I’ll miss the first week of it.”
“If it’s unbearable,” Daisy said, “you’re welcome to crash here. Zoe will be gone by then so you can have the second guest room.”
I smiled appreciatively. “Thank you, but Anton already offered to let me stay with them, and they have a lot more room.”
We settled into watching the movie after that, and I ordered dinner, setting it to arrive around five. Eden seemed restless, shifting on the couch as if she couldn’t get comfortable.
“You okay?” I asked her when the doorbell rang, and Van got up to get our food.
“Ankle is throbbing, and there doesn’t seem to be any way to sit that doesn’t aggravate it.”
“One more day,” I said, reaching out and gently rubbing her arm. “I’m sure the ortho doc will be able to help you get more comfortable.”
“It’s broken,” she said, leaning against me and letting her head fall back. “I think I’m just going to have to survive the next six weeks.”
“I’m sorry about that.” Her hair was soft against my arm, and I longed to run my fingers through it.
“By the way, if I have to be in this boot for six weeks, I’m going to stay here.”
“You are?” I hadn’t been expecting this.
Her staying in Vegas for another six weeks potentially changed everything.
I wasn’t sure if this was good or bad.
“I can barely stand sitting on the couch in one position for any length of time,” she continued. “I can’t imagine spending twelve hours on a plane. Navigating the airport. My luggage. Everything involved in traveling. And I don’t have a car at home, so I have to take public transportation everywhere. I’m exhausted just thinking about it. It’s easier to stay here until I’m mobile again. You don’t think about how something as minor as a broken ankle can totally fuck up your way of life until it happens. I don’t know how people in New York City do it.”
“Yeah, I imagine it’s difficult for people who can’t afford cabs and such.”
“So I’ll be here until I’m better.”
“I’m glad,” I said quietly, reaching for her hand.
“Are you?”
“Why wouldn’t I be? I’ve been wanting to spend time with you.”
“Yes, I know, but I thought we decided it was a bad idea?”
“You decided that. And anyway, now that you’re staying for another six weeks we have time to figure out just how much we like each other.” I paused. “And don’t think I’m letting you off the hook because you broke your ankle.”
“Off the hook?” She looked confused.
“You owe me a date.”
11
Eden
I was going out on my first date in over a year.
With a hot American hockey player who made me want to feel things I’d promised myself I wouldn’t feel again for a long time.
It had been three days since the night he’d come over to the house, and we’d all had dinner. He was off tonight so we were going to dinner and then to a movie. We’d decided to keep things simple and traditional, which I hadn’t been expecting from him. For some reason, I’d figured he would start angling for a way to get me to go home with him, but he hadn’t even hinted at anything like that. In fact, he’d made a point of saying he could bring me home anytime I wanted since my ankle was still so uncomfortable.
I’d seen the orthopedic specialist, and as Dr. Markovich had predicted, my ankle was broken but the bones hadn’t been displaced, so if I kept the boot on and didn’t put weight on it, it would heal in four to six weeks. Then I’d need to do some physical therapy to build up the strength again. Until then, he’d prescribed some non-narcotic pain meds to help me get around more comfortably, and I had the stronger stuff at night if I needed them.
My biggest problem today was deciding what to wear. It was cold out, so I was leaning toward jeans, but it was hard to get the boot on over them. I currently had a bunch of clothes spread out all over the guest room while Zoe and Daisy held things up for me as I tried to decide.
“This reminds me of old times,” Zoe said softly, her eyes growing misty. “God, I miss you guys so much.”
“Can’t you stay longer?” I asked.
She shook her head. “Classes start up soon, and I have to focus.”
“Being apart sucks,” Daisy said. “Living in three different countries is unacceptable. You’re going to have to marry Decker,” she said to me. “That’s all there is to it.”
“What about me?” Zoe demanded, pretending to pout. “You don’t want me to marry one of the Sidewinders so we can all live in the same city?”
Daisy laughed. “I’d love for you to live here, but we all know you’re going to wind up with Slava. I don’t know what this break bullshit is about, but you’ll come to your senses. And then at least you’ll be in the U.S. It’ll be easier to visit.”
Zoe sighed. “I’m so confused, you guys. I love him, but there’s a tiny voice inside of me saying I need to step back, slow down, something. I can’t explain it. And I don’t think it’s him. This is a case where it’s absolutely me. And the worst thing? He says it’s okay. He loves me enough to let me work through it. Isn’t that the sweetest thing ever?”
“It is,” I agreed slowly. “But the thing that’s bothering me about it is that you don’t know what the issue is. Like, don’t you think if it was meant to be, you wouldn’t feel this way?”
“I don’t know,” Zoe whispered. “I’m going to see a therapist when I get home. Maybe he or she can help me sort it out.”
“Slava will wait,” Daisy said firmly. “I have no doubt.”
Zoe nodded. “I know. I just feel shitty about putting him in this position where we’re not together, but neither of us wants to be with anyone else.”
“You need to figure this out sooner rather than later,” I said gently. “It’s not fair to either of you.”
“I know. Believe me, I know.” Zoe looked miserable. I opted to change the subject.
“So, do you think I’ll be warm enough in leggings?” I asked them.
“I think Decker could keep you warm if the leggings don’t,” Daisy said, biting back a giggle.
“I’m sure he could, but you know I’m not all that excited about sex.” We’d had many conversations about my lackluster experiences in the bedroom.
“God, I wish I wasn’t so jealous,” Zoe moaned. “I would lend you Slava, and I am a thousand percent sure he could figure out why you can’t get off with anyone but yourself.”
“Same with Jean-Michel, but I’m not offering him up either.” Daisy shook her head. “I love you, but there are limits to what I’ll share.”
“Oh, sure. You won’t share your men with me, but you share them with each other,” I teased.
“We only watch,” Daisy said firmly. “No physical contact of any kind. And it’s only been a couple of times.”
“Is it truly that hot?” I asked softly. They’d told me about how they’d made love to their respective partners in front of each other. I’d never done anything like that and somehow felt a little left out, though I wasn’t sure why since I didn’t even like sex for the most part.
“It’s sexy,” Zoe said, nodding. “I wasn’t sure when Slava first mentioned it, since Daisy’s like a sister, but watching what she and Jean-Michel do was seriously hot. The first time, we just had intercourse at the same time”
“The second time,” Daisy said, grinning. “She watched Jean-Michel go down on me, and then I watched her and Slava do sixty-nine. Super fucking hot. Jesus, now I need to go jump my man.”
I laughed, tugging on a long-sleeved red tunic that hugged my curves and fell to just below my bum. “Wait until I’m gone, okay? Now, what do you think of this top with the dark gray leggings and my black suede boots? Well, one suede boot and one medical boot.”
“I like it,” Zoe said. “Red is a great color on you and those leggings show off your long legs.”
“Have fun,” Daisy said in a soft, more serious voice. “I know this is your first date since Lawrence, and Decker is a good guy. Maybe not a forever kind of guy, but he’s sexy and sweet, and I’m willing to bet he knows his way around a vagina.”
“I’m in no condition for any vagina action, but sexy and sweet sounds good. It’s been a long time since I had any.”
We ate dinner as a small, quaint restaurant in a part of Las Vegas I’d never been to before. The food was good, the service excellent, and the atmosphere lovely. The best part was Decker, though. He was everything Daisy said he would be and probably a bit more. I’d never been out with a man whose sole focus was on me. I’d been out with lots of guys who’d been trying to get me into bed—that went without saying sometimes—but even those guys hadn’t been this genuinely attentive. And I wished I knew why it was so easy to be with him.
“You sure you still want to go to the movies?” he asked once we were back in his SUV.
“We could go somewhere and talk,” I said after a moment. “I’ve enjoyed spending time with you and honestly don’t want to sit in a theater where we have to be quiet.”
“We could go to my place,” he said thoughtfully, “but it’s not ideal. The downstairs is a war zone, and I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable being up in my bedroom on our first date.”
“We could go back to Daisy and Jean-Michel’s,” I said, “but we won’t be able to talk. Not alone anyway.”
He reached across the console for my hand. “What if we went to Club Inferno? Not for the sex games or anything, but a low-key place that serves drinks, where we could hang out without our friends around? There are couches and places to rest your leg that are more comfortable than a regular bar. And I just happen to have a couple of guest passes.”
“Oh.” That sounded perfect. “Yes. Let’s.”
He squeezed my fingers as he made a U-turn and went in the opposite direction.
Five minutes later, we pulled up to the club. and he helped me out of the SUV, handing me my crutches.
“You’ll probably have to sign a consent form that includes an NDA and—”
“A non-disclosure? Really?”
“Yeah. They’re strict about privacy. It was different on New Year’s Eve, but tonight it’s closed to the public and members are serious about no photos or videos or anything without permission.”
“Oh. Right. Well, that’s not a problem.”
We went inside, and once he showed the man at the desk something on his phone we had to show ID, sign a couple of forms, and then put on white wrist bands.
“These indicate you’re guests and not allowed any sexual interaction with members,” the man at the desk said. “You don’t have access to the dungeons or the private suites upstairs, and the bar is cash only.”
Decker nodded, and we walked inside. Well, he walked, and I hobbled on the blasted crutches. My underarms were sore, and I was using muscles I may never have used before, leaving me achy and a bit irritated with my ankle. And with Lawrence since this was all his fault. I was out on a date with a gorgeous man and should have been having a great time. Instead, I had to contend with crutches, the boot, and aches and pains.
“Let’s settle over here,” Decker said, pointing to an area with cushioned love seats and oversized chairs. “There’s waitress service, so we can drink, and it’s quieter than on the other side.”
“Okay.” I gratefully sank onto the love seat, letting out a breath. I was more tired than I wanted to admit, and I fought off the frustration lurking just beneath the surface.
“What would you like to drink?” he asked when a scantily clad waitress approached us. She was a stunning brunette who wore nothing but ridiculously high heels, a thong, and pasties on her nipples. How on earth did she serve drinks like that? Wasn’t she cold? My nipples were getting hard just looking at her.
“Er, a glass of merlot, please.”
“Light beer for me,” Decker told her. “In a bottle, please.”
