Rock God, page 27
“I feel free,” Devyn whispered against my mouth.
I lazily grazed my lips across hers. “You are. Free to do anything you want.”
“Most of what I want to do is you.”
I reached down to palm her ass. “I like the sound of that.”
“I’m sure you do.”
Our lips met lovingly, a sweet exchange of kisses and caresses that were appropriate for a public arena. The press had switched gears and now seemed to find us adorable, which was the direction Dorian had been pushing us toward. We had a bunch of photo ops coming up when we got to Paris next week, and I had a few more surprises for Devyn up my sleeve too.
Things were definitely on the upswing.
I’d never thought love could feel so good, or so intense, but that was probably because I’d never truly been in love before.
Now that I was, I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
I’d found not just my other half, but a part of me I hadn’t known was missing. She made me whole and made me a better man.
What more could anyone ask for?
Thank you for reading Kingston and Devyn’s story. Kellan and Jesse are up next in ROCK STEADY, so turn the page for a snippet and get ready to one-click!
EXCERPT FROM “ROCK STEADY” (ROCK HARDER, BOOK 3)
Prologue
Kellan
Knocking someone up had always been one of my biggest fears. Not because I didn’t want kids someday but because I wasn’t ready. I was also determined to stay single for another decade, so becoming some random groupie’s baby daddy wasn’t my thing. I was always careful to bring my own condoms and stay on top of using them. No matter how fucked up I got.
So I was having a hard time wrapping my head around the idea that I’d knocked up my new bass player’s best friend.
Sweet, sexy Jesse.
We’d had a hell of a time on Thanksgiving night, and I’d honestly been looking forward to seeing her again on New Year’s Eve in London.
It never occurred to me she might have gotten pregnant. I didn’t recall any condom malfunctions and though we’d exchanged a few texts since the night we’d spent together, she hadn’t so much as hinted at a pregnancy.
The news that she’d miscarried on the flight and had started to hemorrhage after they landed had been jarring. Technically, there was nothing for me to do since Jesse and I weren’t dating and there was no longer a baby. Yet here I was, heading to the hospital instead of partying with my bandmates and ringing in the new year.
“Hey.” Sasha Petrov, our band’s manager, got up when she saw me.
“How is she?” I asked quietly.
“She’s resting. She had a little trouble coming out of the anesthesia, but she’s better now.”
“Okay.” I didn’t know what I was doing here so I wasn’t sure what else to say.
“Do you want to sit with her for a while? We didn’t want her to be alone, but I told Devyn not to come back until tomorrow. She has a lot going on tonight.”
Our gig earlier tonight had been the first concert of our European tour, and only the second gig ever with Devyn, our new bass player.
“Yeah.” I absently scratched my head, gazing past her to the redhead dozing on the bed.
For some reason, I’d needed to be here.
I didn’t know why—there was no rational explanation for the emotions simmering just beneath the surface—but everything inside of me was screaming that Jesse needed me.
“You’ve been here all day,” I said after a moment. “Go ahead and get some rest. I’ll stay with her.”
“You sure?” Sasha’s shrewd eyes met mine, probably just as curious as I was about my appearance.
“Yeah. I, uh, I want to.”
“All right. Thanks. Let me know if either of you need anything.” She went back inside and gathered up her things, flashing me a quick smile before slipping out.
I stood there without moving for a couple of minutes after Sasha left, looking over at the bed where Jesse appeared to be dozing. She looked a little pale, but otherwise as beautiful as I remembered. Her eyes were closed, but I knew they were a gorgeous blue-green color that turned cerulean when she was turned on. She had full, pink lips that matched the color of her nipples, and I couldn’t decide which I liked sucking on better.
Her hair was red, but she’d told me the shade came from a bottle. She’d described her natural color as auburn with deep red highlights, and for some reason I could picture it in my mind’s eye even though I’d never even seen it in a picture.
I’d spent a lot more time thinking about her the last few weeks than I wanted to admit, but I’d chalked it up to good sex and interesting conversation. We’d texted back and forth, and I’d been counting on the fact that I would see her on New Year’s Eve.
This wasn’t the setting I’d been envisioning though.
“Kellan?” Her voice sounded raspy, and I walked toward the bed cautiously.
“Hey. How are you feeling?”
“A little groggy, but not too bad.”
“Can I get you anything?”
“No.” She shook her head, red-rimmed eyes meeting mine. “What, um, what are you doing here?”
“Is it all right that I came?” I took another step closer. “Devyn told me you were here and…I guess I felt like I needed to come.”
She looked surprised but then nodded. “I’m glad you did.”
“Can you tell me what happened?”
“You know almost as much as I do,” she whispered. “I had no idea I was pregnant. No symptoms, no nausea, nothing. My period was technically late, but I’ve never had a regular cycle, it comes anywhere from twenty-eight to thirty-five days, so I don’t worry too much it when I’m late. I’m not on birth control, but you and I used condoms, and I don’t recall any issues.”
I shook my head. “We didn’t have any accidents. At least none I could see.”
“I was feeling a little off when Devyn flew out to New York after the porn story broke, but I was distracted by what was going on with her. I thought the cramps were because I was finally getting my period. Then I started bleeding.” Her eyes suddenly filled with tears, and she took a shuddery breath before looking away.
“Hey, you don’t have to talk about it anymore if you don’t want to,” I said quickly. “I just wanted to know what happened since you never said anything when we texted.”
“There was nothing to tell.”
“Do you need anything?” I asked since there didn’t seem to be anything else to say about what had happened.
“It’s New Year’s Eve,” she whispered, still not looking at me. “I’m sure there’s a big party happening. You don’t have to stay. I’ll be okay.”
“Jesse.” I took one of her hands between both of mine. “Unless you want me to leave, I’m not going anywhere. This was partly my fault.”
“Babies are nowhere on my radar,” she said, as a tear slowly trickled down her cheek. “I didn’t even know I was pregnant. But now I feel like I lost something. Why? Why do I feel so sad about losing something I never had?”
“Don’t cry,” I said softly, using my knuckles to brush away the tears. “I don’t know why, but I kinda feel the same way. Like we lost something we didn’t know we wanted.”
What the hell was I saying?
It was like someone had taken over my brain and was talking for me.
“I’m sorry.” She started crying in earnest then and for some reason it gutted me.
I leaned over, awkwardly wrapping my arms around her, letting her sob against my chest. “It’s not your fault. Miscarriages happen all the time. You’re going to be okay.”
“Could you get me a tissue, please?” she asked, sniffling.
“Sure.” I straightened up and looked around, grabbing a couple of tissues out of the nearby box. I handed them to her and waited while she blew her nose.
“I didn’t think I was a mess until now,” she said after a moment. “And I don’t know why.”
“Same.” I reached out to brush her hair out of her face. “So, is everything okay now? Physically, I mean. What did the doctor say?”
“I’ve always had weird female issues, like irregular periods and stuff. They can’t find anything wrong with me, and Dr. Scott said this was just one of those things. She doesn’t see any reason why I won’t have a healthy, full-term pregnancy in the future.”
“That’s good, right?” I met her gaze.
“Yeah. I mean, like I said, I’m not ready for kids, but I want them someday.” She paused. “Do you?”
“Want kids someday?” I hesitated. “I do. I can’t picture my life with kids in it, but there’s a fantasy version of my life, in the future, where I have them. Does that make sense?”
“Wow, it’s like we’re sharing a brain.” She managed a wan smile. “I feel the same way. Like, I want them, I know I want to be a mom, but there’s no timeline. I can’t picture it, I just know it’ll happen eventually, when the time is right.”
“I wish I hadn’t caused this,” I mumbled. “I hate that it was so bad you needed surgery and everything. I don’t know what your situation is with insurance, but I’ll take care of the bills, okay?”
“My job provides excellent insurance, and since this was literally emergency surgery, they’ll reimburse me. Most of it anyway.”
“I’ll take care of the hospital here and you can deal with it on your end. If they don’t want to reimburse you, don’t worry about it.”
Her eyes got a little misty. “Why are you being so nice? We had a one-night stand. You don’t owe me anything just because my best friend plays in your band.”
“I’m not here because of Devyn,” I said slowly, realizing that was the truth. “I’m here because whatever happened, one-night stand or not, we did this together. You have to go through the pain and potential recovery time alone, so I figure the least I can do is be here. If it eases your burden for me to take care of the bills, that’s something I can do. If holding your hand makes you feel less alone, I can do that too. Just tell me what you need, no matter what it is, and I’m here for it.”
She was quiet for a beat too long, even though the look in her eyes told me she had something to ask of me.
“What?” I asked after a moment. “What can I do?”
She took a deep, shaky breath and held out a hand. I wrapped mine around it as I waited for her to talk. “Would you hold me?” she whispered. “I just need you to hold me for a little while. Until I fall asleep.”
I looked at the small uncomfortable hospital bed, wondering how we would both fit, but didn’t hesitate to nod. “Absolutely. Scooch over.”
She moved over a couple of inches as I took off my jacket and boots. I’d come here straight from the gig, so I hoped I didn’t smell too bad since I sweated a lot on stage.
“No promises about how well my deodorant is still working after a ninety-minute show,” I said, slowly climbing into the bed.
“I don’t care how you smell,” she said.
Careful not to jostle her IV or the monitors she was hooked up to, I managed to slide in on my side, and gently guided her into a position where she was half on her side too. I pulled her up against me so her back was pressed to my front, and slid an arm around her waist.
“How’s that?” I asked, talking softly against her ear.
“Better.” She sighed and I felt her relax against me.
Why the hell did this feel so good?
This could have been a disaster if she hadn’t had the miscarriage, because no matter how much I liked Jesse, I was in no position to be a dad. She didn’t sound keen on being a mom right now either, yet part of me was positive we would’ve found a way to make it work.
And that made no sense at all.
All I knew was that lying here on this small, uncomfortable hospital bed with the sassy redhead I’d spent one night with a little over a month ago, was somehow exactly how I was supposed to ring in the new year.
My band, the parties I was undoubtedly missing, and tomorrow night’s show were the furthest things from my mind.
“Kellan?”
“Yeah, babe?”
Why had I just called her babe?!
“Thank you.”
“For what?”
“Just being here. Somehow knowing what I needed when I didn’t even know.”
“It’s okay. I’ll be right here as long as you need me.”
“Happy New Year, Kellan.”
“Happy New Year, Jesse.”
Want more? Flip the page for links to Rock Steady and all of my other titles. And thanks for reading!
ALSO BY KAT MIZERA
Las Vegas Sidewinders:
Dominic
Cody’s Christmas Surprise
Drake
Karl
Anatoli
Zakk
Toli & Tessa
Brock
Vladimir
Royce
Nate
Sidewinders: Ever After
Jared
Dmitri’s Christmas Angel
Ian
Dax (A Royal Protectors/Sidewinders crossover novel)
Suze’s Diary (A Sidewinders Companion Novella)
Sidewinders: Generations:
Zaan
Tore
Anton
Van
Decker
Alaska Blizzard:
Defending Dani
Holding Hailey
Winning Whitney
Losing Laurel
Saving Sara
Chasing Charli
A Very Blizzard Christmas
Tending Tara
Calling Cassie
Playing Peyton
Catching Lana (An Alaska Blizzard Companion Novel)
St. Louis Mavericks (with Brenda Rothert)
Hard Fall
Hard Limit
Hard Pass
Hard Luck
Hard Hit
Lauderdale Knights:
Knight Before Christmas (A Garland Grove/Lauderdale Knights holiday novel)
Slap Shot
Big Shot
Long Shot
Hot Shot
Sure Shot
Rough Shot
Cheap Shot
Rock Hard:
Play
Pause
Rewind
Fast Forward
Rock Harder:
Rock Bottom
Rock God
Rock Steady
The Royal Trilogy:
Nowhere Left to Fall
Nowhere Left to Run
Nowhere Left to Hide
Royal Protectors:
Sandor
Cocky Protector (book 1.5, part of the Cocky Heroes Club series)
Xander
Axel
Dax (A Royal Protectors/Sidewinders crossover novel)
Inferno:
Salvation’s Inferno
Temptation’s Inferno
Redemption’s Inferno
Tropical Inferno (formerly “Tropical Ice”)
Romancing Europe:
Adonis in Athens
Smitten in Santorini
Lucky in Lugano
View Kat’s entire collection of books at www.KatMizera.com
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
USA Today Bestselling author Kat Mizera was born in Miami Beach with a healthy dose of wanderlust. She's lived from coast to coast, and everywhere in between, but home is wherever her family is.
A devoted mom and wife to her wonderful and supportive husband (Kevin) and two amazing boys (Nick and Max), Kat loves to travel the globe with her adventurous, hockey loving family. Greece is at the top of that list. She hopes to one day retire there, spending her days writing books on the beach.
Kat is former freelance sports writer who now writes steamy hockey romance about her favorite fictional teams, the Las Vegas Sidewinders and the Alaska Blizzard. The library of novels she's penned also include sexy contemporary stories about baseball stars, alpha sex club owners, special forces heroes, rock stars and royalty. Regardless of genre, her books about bad boys with hearts of gold will steal your breath, rock your world and melt your heart.
WHERE TO FOLLOW KAT:
WEBSITE
BOOKBUB
KAT’S PRIVATE FACEBOOK GROUP
Kat Mizera, Rock God
