Wait for Always, page 2
He answered on the second ring. “Mia?”
“I have an SOS situation.”
Derek huffed on the phone. “What’s going on?”
“Brad just … dumped me.”
“Fuck.”
“He’s not going to be here to escort me.”
“What the fuck?” Derek demanded. “Do I need to find him and beat the shit out of him?”
I laughed softly. “Uh, no. Not enough time. I don’t know what else to do. Will you walk me?”
My brother was four years older and a basketball star at University of North Carolina-Chapel Hill. I was lucky enough that he’d been able to come home at all during Christmas break for my cotillion. He’d probably fly out to make a game tomorrow. But he’d escorted more than his fair share of St. Catherine’s debs in his years as a Holy Cross boy. St. Catherine’s was the all-girls Catholic high school and Holy Cross was the all-boys school next door. Thus, Derek knew the dance. It would be humiliating that I’d have to walk with my brother and not a date, but I was a Ballentine. My reputation could withstand the whispers.
“I’ve got you covered. Sending in reinforcements.”
I laughed to hold back my tears. “Thanks, Derek.”
Before Mary could ask where exactly my escort was again, I hustled out of the backstage area and to the locked side entrance. A knock came on the other side a few minutes later, and I pulled it open, expecting my brother.
Instead, I found Ash Talmadge.
I gaped at him, standing silhouetted in the doorway in a tuxedo. My heart literally stopped beating for a split second.
Ash was my brother’s best friend. We’d grown up together since we were really little. Since his dad and my dad were also best friends. Even though he was two years younger than Derek, they’d had always hung out. We’d even vacationed together in the summer. But while the age difference didn’t seem to matter for friends, Ash being two years older than me, twenty to my seventeen, almost eighteen, felt like an insurmountable difference. And yet I’d never wanted him more than in that moment.
“Hey, Mia,” he said with a grin that revealed just the hint of a dimple.
“Ash,” I gasped, quickly recovering. I threw my arms around him. “I had no idea you were coming to my debutante.”
“Of course. I couldn’t miss it.”
“When did you get back from Duke?” I asked, gesturing for him to come inside.
“A couple days ago. When Derek invited me to your deb ball, how could I refuse? And I heard there was an incident with your boyfriend?”
I rolled my eyes. “Ex-boyfriend.”
I showed him the text message. Ash’s face was hot with anger.
“What a dick.”
“Tell me about it.” I hid my phone again in the pocket of my white deb dress. “So … I’m sort of without an escort.”
“Ah, yes, well, I’m the reinforcements. I’ll escort you if you’ll have me.”
My body practically listed toward him.
Good riddance, Brad. He was nothing compared to Ash. That was for damn sure.
“I would … love that,” I said softly.
I wasn’t sure if Ash knew what kind of effect he had on me. I wasn’t exactly subtle in how I felt about him, but I’d basically been his kid sister for much of our lives. He and Derek would run off and make trouble while I tried to keep up with them and generally failed. I wanted there to be a moment when that all changed. When he saw me as more than just his best friend’s little sister, but that only happened in movies.
“Amelia!” Mary called again.
“This way.” I took Ash’s hand in mine and pulled him down the hall.
Mary tapped her foot impatiently. A smile came to her mouth at the sight of my new escort. “Well, James, what a pleasure.”
Ash grinned at Mary. “James is my father.”
Ash was technically James Asheford Talmadge IV, but no one called him that. He was just Ash to us.
“Yes, yes.” She waved her hand. “To what do we owe the pleasure?”
“He’s my escort,” I blurted out quickly.
The other debutantes gasped and tittered behind Mary. They were eyeing Ash with blatant jealousy. Their boyfriends or dates or escorts were all going to pale in comparison to him. A college boy this handsome was always a prized catch.
Mary arched an eyebrow. “Where’s Brad?”
Ash cut in smoothly. “He’s not good enough for our Amelia,” Ash said affectionately. “Plus, we both know I can waltz better than anyone else here.”
Mary softened. “That is true.”
I was certain that Mary was going to get on me for Brad’s absence, but a few words from Ash Talmadge, and she was putty in his hands too. Incredible.
Ash drew me in close as Mary put us in line. “There … the night is salvaged.”
“I think you just made her knees weak,” I whispered.
He grinned and leaned in conspiratorially. “She actually has a thing for Derek.”
I gagged. “Ew, Ash! She’s, like, my mom’s age.”
He laughed. “Hey, older women can teach you things.”
“Now, you’re just trying to make me sick.”
“I’m sure older guys can teach you things too.”
“You’re older than me,” I shot back before the implication of my words hit me.
Ash’s eyes traveled down to my lips and back up. My cheeks flushed. Time slowed to a crawl. Had Ash ever looked at me like that? Not as far as I knew. Only in my dreams. I wondered in that moment if, finally, all those dreams were about to come true.
Then, the moment burst like a popped bubble.
Ash straightened to his considerable height, as if realizing exactly who he was flirting with. “That’s not what I meant.”
I deflated slightly at those words. No, of course it wasn’t what he’d meant. Ash Talmadge might have looked down at my lips, but as soon as he remembered that I was Derek’s little sister and completely off-limits … he’d never look at me like that again.
“Of course not,” I said, forcing out my own laugh. “I was joking.”
“Come on, deb.” He offered me his arm. “Let’s go show the world who their queen is.”
Somehow, he still brought back my smile.
“There is no deb queen.”
“There will be this year,” he said confidently as he followed the line of debs toward the stage.
My stomach flipped at his words. Even if he wasn’t thinking about me in a romantic sense, it didn’t change a single thing about how I felt about him. It never had.
The rest of the presentation that I’d spent my life anticipating went by in a blur. I walked across the stage to raucous applause. A bouquet of roses was placed in my arms while I smiled my pageant smile. It was over in a matter of minutes. And suddenly, I was a lady in the eyes of society.
The traditional waltz was the last official step of the night. Ash took my hand and drew me onto the dance floor, and even though he hadn’t waltzed in at least a year, we moved together as if we had been born to it. And we had been. A Ballentine and a Talmadge had been made for this.
“So, have you heard from colleges?” Ash asked as we passed another couple, who was struggling with the steps.
“Parsons.” I beamed. “I just got my acceptance letter in the mail.”
“Congratulations! And you’re pursuing fashion design?”
“Yes. I’m so excited.”
“I remember the outfits that you would make when we were younger. You wanted to put on a play for the Fourth of July, but we only had bathing suits and T-shirts. You stripped my mother’s hundred-dollar curtains and made suitable outfits for the show. When my mother realized what you were wearing, she literally fainted.”
I burst into laughter. “Oh my God, your mom never forgave me.”
“She did,” he assured me. “Your mom replaced them.”
That part of the story I’d forgotten entirely. Mom and Dad had divorced when I was in middle school after he had an affair. He and Kathy had been married for years now, Mom had moved to Charleston to be near her brother, and I was the one stuck in the middle of it all. Sometimes, I forgot what it had been like when Mom was here and she and Dad didn’t hate each other.
“That feels so long ago.”
“I suppose it was,” Ash agreed. “But the play was better with the new attire.”
“It was, and, yes, I’ll be doing fashion. I designed my deb outfit,” I said, gesturing to my long white gown. “And I’ve been putting together a new gown for Miss Georgia.”
“Which you will surely win,” he said with a dashing smile.
I laughed. “Don’t get ahead of yourself. It’s a long jump from Miss Savannah to Miss Georgia.”
The waltz came to a halt, and I let my arms drop. But Ash came forward, brushing a strand of loose dark hair off of my cheek. My heart thudded, and everything else seemed to disappear. The music dimmed. The rest of the debs were gone, and suddenly, we stood together, alone, on a crowded dance floor.
“You’re going to win,” he told me with utter confidence. “You don’t know how to lose.”
I wanted to step forward. I wanted to lean into him. Oh, how I had wanted that for so long. I would have given anything to have him see me in that moment. For it not to just be me craving this boy, but to have him desire me in return.
“Will you be there?” I asked, my voice breathy.
He smiled, and I was sure that I didn’t imagine the hint of desire on his handsome face. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”
3
Miss Georgia
June 27, 2009
“And the winner is … Amelia Ballentine!”
My hands flew to my mouth as I gasped in shock. My runner-up pulled me in for a giant hug, congratulating me on my success. Then, the former Miss Georgia helped fit me into my crown, a bouquet of flowers was pushed into my arms, and I strode forward, smiling through my astonishment at my win.
Confetti rained down on the front seats. Tears threatened to run down my face. The crowd was on their feet for me. My entire world had come to watch me win this crown. They were currently seated to the left of the stage, and I waved. Their cheers rose even higher.
I’d been in pageants since I had been old enough to toddle on the stage. They were outdated, of course. As much as debutante balls. They were patriarchal bullshit. A way to get men and to have men ogle us and for women to be judged on their looks. But at the same time, it was so much more than that for me and all the other women on this stage. It was about doing good for the world, raising money for charity, and finding a platform to be heard as a woman. It was damn hard to have that in this world. If I had to strut in a bikini and a ball gown for a few judges so I could promote my platform, then so be it.
At the debutante ball earlier this year, I’d raised five thousand dollars to help get foster children clothing and supplies. Today, the entire state of Georgia had heard me discuss the need for a better foster system and the promise that, one day, I would open my own clothing boutique and donate proceeds to help.
All of this would be worth it in the end.
After the fanfare and pictures and interviews, I was finally released for the night and found my family waiting for me.
“Mom,” I said, throwing myself into my mom, Margie’s, arms.
After my obligations were over for the pageant, I would be going to Charleston to spend a few weeks with her, and I’d been looking forward to it all summer.
“You were incredible, sweetie.”
“You really were,” Kathy said, crowding in next to her.
My moms. Kathy was my stepmom, and I probably should have hated her for breaking up my family. But she had been with my dad for five years and had been at every single event of mine. Even the ones that Mom couldn’t drive in for because she was too busy with her interior design business.
I released my mom and threw my arms around Kathy. “Thank you for coming.”
Kathy laughed and squeezed me tighter. “My little pageant queen. Of course, we all had to be here.”
“Baby,” my dad, Doug, said from behind my moms.
I released Kathy and stared at him. I’d always been a daddy’s girl. I wasn’t quite sure what I was now that he’d ruined everything. Sure, I’d gotten a second mom in the process, who I loved. He was still my daddy, but part of me hated him.
“I’m so proud of you,” he said softly.
It was my mom urging me forward that got me to take the step in my heels. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed my forehead.
“You did amazing.”
“Thanks, Daddy.”
I broke away first and turned to find my brother.
Derek handed me another bouquet of flowers. “I knew you’d win.”
I laughed. “Thanks, Derek.”
My cousin Marina barreled into me, crushing my bouquets between our chests. “It was horribly outdated, but you were right, it was magic.”
I snorted. Mom had driven Marina in from Charleston. She was my closest friend. I’d never trusted any of the girls at school like I did Marina. We’d spent every summer together since we were kids, and I hated that this was going to be the last one.
“I can’t believe you even came. You hate pageants.”
“Yeah, well, I can’t hate anything with you in it,” Marina said matter-of-factly. She was the kind of dark-haired, blue-eyed girl next door that didn’t have to try for everything that came her way. She was comfortable whether running for school president, wearing a homecoming queen crown, or fishing on one of her family boats.
“Thanks, Rina.”
A throat cleared behind her, and my world shifted.
“Ash,” I said in surprise. He’d told me at the deb ball that he’d be here, but that had been months ago. I hadn’t been sure if he remembered … or cared.
He held out another bouquet of red roses. “Congratulations on your win.”
I accepted them with a smile. “Thank you so much. I’m glad you came.”
“I told you that I would.”
Derek coughed. “My little sister.”
Ash shot him a dirty look. “What? She did good.”
Derek punched him in the arm. “I saw that look before.”
My cheeks flushed at those words. I loved my older brother, but sometimes, he was so embarrassing. He could have let me and Ash have our moment.
“All right,” my mom interjected. “It’s late. Let’s head back to the hotel. We can do brunch in the morning.”
Everyone started talking at once, and I fell into step beside Marina. I glanced back once at Ash to find him looking right at me. Our eyes locked in the space between us. My stomach flipped as something solidified in that look. The same one I’d seen at the debutante ball when I considered being brave enough to kiss him. Then, Derek smacked him in the chest, breaking the look.
I turned back around to Marina, who arched a knowing eyebrow.
“We’re talking about this later.”
Marina had moved her stuff into my already-crowded hotel room when I was at the RiverCenter, getting ready for the pageant. I’d left most of my stuff in my backstage dressing room since I’d have all-day interviews and meet and greets tomorrow. But tonight, I was free.
Marina collapsed back on the king-size bed we’d be sharing. “So, are you going to finally put your tongue down his throat?”
I snorted. “Marina!”
“What? You have been into Ash Talmadge your entire life. And I saw that look he gave you.”
“Yeah,” I admitted. “It wasn’t the first time.”
She shrieked. “Excuse me? Why was I not informed?”
“You didn’t come to my debutante ball.”
Marina wrinkled her nose. “Those are so old-fashioned.”
“You were homecoming queen!”
“Yeah, but, like, I gave my crown away to my friend Carol because they’d refused to let the lesbian couple be on the court, and I thought that was bullshit. She would have won if they hadn’t been such bigots.”
“That was the right thing to do,” I admitted. “But still … you let yourself be on the court. It’s not that different.”
She shrugged, conceding the point. “Fine. But back to the important thing: you’ve been keeping secrets. Tell, tell!”
“Well, I told you how he walked me at the ball because Brad dumped me.”
“Yes.”
“So … there was a moment where he looked at my lips and then back up at me. And we were dancing, and there was this”—I sighed dramatically—“moment.”
“Girl, you have it so bad. Can you just kiss him already?”
“When exactly would I do that? I’m going to Charleston with you when I leave here.”
“Oh my God … let’s go out tonight!”
I blinked. “Where?”
“I don’t know. The boys will know.”
“The boys?”
Marina rolled her eyes. “Derek and Ash, obviously. What other boys? They’ll know where to go out and get drunk.”
“I cannot get drunk. I have interviews in the morning.”
“Then, we’d better get started.” Marina grabbed my hand and hauled me out of the room. She tiptoed past the rooms for my parents. She knocked on the door to the boys’ room.
Derek answered, and my heart sank. Oh no.
“Hey, let’s go out,” Marina said mischievously.
“You’re eighteen,” he reminded her.
“And? As if I’ve never had a beer before. As if you never had a beer at eighteen,” Marina countered. “I remember that one summer where Dare and I had to carry you back inside while Tye laughed his ass off.”
Daron and Tye were Marina’s brothers. Daron was two years older, and Tye was the same age as us, but he’d been adopted, so they weren’t twins.
Derek held his hand up. “Don’t remind me. I had a hangover for days.”
“What’s going on?” Ash asked, appearing at the door.
“They want to go out.”
“Then, let’s go out.”
