Bound By Temptation, page 3
“That’s right. I don’t care if I have to lock you into your room until your marriage day to protect your reputation and honor.”
This wasn’t about my honor or reputation. I didn’t care about it. This was all about my father. It was always about the men in the family, what they wanted and expected.
“Rocco, Lily is a good girl. She won’t do anything,” Mother said carefully. That wasn’t what she usually told me. She always warned me that I was too flirty, too aware of the effect that my body had on men. But I was glad for her support because too often she’d remained silent when Father had attacked Gianna in the same way.
Father let go of me and turned on her. “It was your job to raise decent girls. For your sake, I hope you’re right and Liliana won’t follow after Gianna.” The menace in his voice made me quiver. How could he be so horrible toward his own wife?
Mother blanched. I backed away and nobody tried to stop me. I quickly ran upstairs. Fabi waited for me, his eyes wide and curious. “What happened?” he asked fearfully.
I shook my head in response, not in the mood to recap everything for him, and stormed toward my room.
I’d never been at the center of Father’s anger like that. But now that Gianna was gone as well, he’d keep an extra eye on me, making sure I was the perfect lady he wanted his daughters to be. I’d always felt free, never understood why Gianna felt so restrained by our life, but now it started to dawn on me. Things would change now.
***
In the months since Gianna’s escape, things at home had been tense at best. Father had lost it over the smallest things. He’d hit me only twice, but Fabi hadn’t been as lucky. But worse than the violence was his constant suspicion, the way he watched me like I was another scandal in the making. My golden cage had become a bit smaller, even though that had seemed hardly possible before. I hoped things would change now that Matteo had caught Gianna and was bringing her back to Chicago. Maybe that would appease Father, although he’d seemed far from appeased when I’d last seen him. I wasn’t quite sure what exactly had happened but from what I gathered Gianna had been caught with another man, and that was the worst-case scenario in our world. Father would probably put me in shackles to stop me from doing the same.
“When will they be here?” Fabiano asked for the hundredth time. His voice had a whiny tinge to it and I had to stop myself from lashing out at him in frustration.
Fabiano and I had been waiting on the first floor landing for the last twenty minutes, and my patience was running thin.
“I don’t know,” I whispered. “Be quiet. If Mother figures out we’re not in our rooms, we’ll be in trouble.”
“But—”
Voices sounded below. I recognized one of them as Luca’s. He managed to fill a house with it; now wonder considering how big he was.
“They’re here!” Fabiano dashed away and I was close behind him as we stormed down the staircase.
I spotted Gianna immediately. Her hair was brown now and she looked utterly exhausted but apart from that she was the sister I remembered. Father had often made it sound like she would be a new person if she ever returned; a horrible worthless person.
Father sent Fabi and me a glare when he noticed us, but I didn’t care. I rushed toward Gianna and wrapped my arms around her. I’d missed her so much. When I’d first heard that she’d been caught by Matteo, I’d worried he’d kill her, so seeing her unharmed was a huge relief.
“Didn’t I tell you to keep them upstairs?” Father hissed.
“I’m sorry. They were too quick,” Mother said. I peered over my shoulder to see her apologetic face as she came down the staircase. Since Gianna’s escape Father had been on edge constantly and often lashed out at her as well. His screams had woken me more than once at night. I wasn’t sure when he’d become so violent. I didn’t remember him being like that when I was younger, or maybe I’d only been less aware of those things.
“Lily, Fabi, back to your rooms,” Father ordered. I let go of Gianna and was about to protest but Fabi beat me to it.
“But Father, we haven’t seen Gianna in forever,” Fabi grumbled.
Father advanced on us and I tensed. He rarely hit me but he looked furious. He grabbed Fabi and me, and dragged us away from Gianna. Then he pushed us toward the staircase. “Upstairs now.”
I stumbled from the force of his push, but when I’d regained my balance I stopped and didn’t move. I couldn’t believe he wouldn’t let us talk to Gianna after we hadn’t seen her in so long.
“It’s okay,” Gianna said but her face told a different story. She looked hurt and sad, and usually Gianna wasn’t someone who showed that kind of emotion. “We can talk later.”
My eyes were drawn to something behind her: Romero. He stood strong and tall, his eyes firmly focused on my father. I hadn’t seen him in seven months and over time I’d thought I’d gotten over my crush, but seeing him now my stomach fluttered with butterflies again.
Father’s outburst drew my attention back to him. “No, you can’t. I won’t have you around them. You are no longer my daughter, and I don’t want your rottenness to rub off on Liliana,” he thundered. He looked like he would have loved nothing more than to kill Gianna. It scared me. Shouldn’t he love us, his children, no matter what? If I ever did something he disapproved of, would he hate me as well?
“That’s bullshit,” Matteo said.
“Matteo,” Luca said. “This isn’t our business.” My eyes darted between the two, then again toward Romero whose hand was below his vest. A twisted part of me wanted to see him in action. He was probably amazing in fight situations, and an even worse part knew Mother, Fabi and I would be better off if Father was gone.
Mother wrapped her fingers around my wrist and took Fabi’s hand. “Come now,” she said insistently, tugging us toward the staircase and upstairs.
“That’s right. This is my family, and Gianna is still subject to my rule, don’t you ever forget that,” Father said.
“I thought I wasn’t your daughter anymore, so why do I have to listen to a word you say?”
My head whirled around, stunned by the venom in Gianna’s voice.
“Careful,” Father hissed. “You are still part of the Outfit.” He looked like he would have beaten Gianna if it wasn’t for Matteo who held her by the waist. Mother tried to pull me along but Romero glanced up that moment and his eyes met mine. His rejection on my birthday was still fresh in my mind, and yet I knew I still wanted to kiss him. Why was it that we sometimes wanted something that was impossible? Something that only led to hurt?
CHAPTER FOUR
Liliana
Sometimes it felt like I had to prove myself to Father every day. He waited for me to mess up like Gianna had, but I wasn’t sure how that was even possible; he never let me out of sight. Unless I started something with one of my ancient bodyguards, there was no way I could sully my honor. But Father hadn’t forgiven Gianna yet, which was why I hadn’t seen her in almost two years. She was forbidden from coming to Chicago, and I wasn’t allowed to visit New York. If it wasn’t for Aria’s sneakiness, I wouldn’t even have been able to talk to Gianna on the phone.
Sometimes even I felt anger toward Gianna because her escape had turned my life into hell. Maybe Father would have been less strict if Gianna had played by the rules. And then there were moments when I admired her for her daring. There wasn’t a night when I didn’t dream of freedom. I didn’t really want to run but I wished I could carve myself out more freedom in my life. Freedom to date, freedom to fall in love and be with that person.
I didn’t even remember how it felt to be in love. Just like Gianna, I hadn’t seen Romero in almost two years. What I’d felt for him back then, hadn’t been love, not even close. It had been admiration and fascination, I knew that now. But there had been nobody else either. Of course, it was hard to meet someone to fall in love with if you went to an all-girls school and weren’t allowed to go anywhere alone.
The sound of glass shattering downstairs tore me from my thoughts. I jumped off my bed and opened my door. “Mother?” I called. She’d been gone all morning. There was no answer but I could hear someone moving in the kitchen.
I crept out of my room and down the stairs. “Mother?” I tried again when I’d almost reached the door to the kitchen. Still no answer. I pushed the door open and stepped inside. A wine bottle lay broken on the floor, red wine spilled around it. Mother was kneeling beside it, her cream-colored skirt slowly soaking up the liquid, but she didn’t seem to notice. She was staring down at a shard in her palm as if it held the answer to all her questions. I’d never seen her like that. I walked toward her. “Mom?” I almost never called her that, but it felt like the right choice at the moment.
She looked up, her blue eyes unfocused and teary. “Oh, you are home?”
‘Where else would I be?’ I wanted to ask, but instead I touched her shoulder and said, “What’s the matter? Are you alright?”
She stared down at the broken piece of glass in her hand again, then dropped it to the floor. I helped her to her feet. She wasn’t steady on her legs and I could smell alcohol on her breath. It was still early for her to start drinking, and she wasn’t really much of a drinker at all.
“I was at the doctor’s.”
I froze. “Are you sick? What’s wrong?”
“Lung cancer,” she said with a small shrug. “Stage three.”
“But you never smoked! How is that even possible?”
“It can happen,” she said. “I’ll have to start chemotherapy soon.”
I wrapped my arms around her, feeling helpless and small under the weight of that news. “Does Father know?”
“I couldn’t reach him. He didn’t answer his phone.”
Of course not. Why should he answer a call from his wife? He was probably with one of his mistresses. “We need to tell Aria and Gianna. They need to know.”
Mother gripped my arm. “No,” she said firmly. “It’ll ruin their Christmas. I don’t want them to know yet. There’s no reason to worry them. I haven’t spoken to Gianna in a long time anyway, and Aria has enough on her plate as the wife of a Capo.”
“But Mom, they’d want to know.”
“Promise me you won’t tell them,” she demanded.
I nodded slowly. What else could I do?
***
Two hours later I heard Father come home and another thirty minutes later, Mother’s light steps came upstairs and then the door to the master bedroom closed. She’d been alone. Was Father still downstairs? I left my room and went to his office on the first floor. After a moment of hesitation, I knocked. I needed to talk to him.
Our Christmas party would be in two weeks and now that Mother was sick, Gianna should be invited. She and Mother should get the chance to spend some time together and reconcile.
“Come in,” Father said.
I opened the door and poked my head in, half expecting to see him devastated and crying, but he was bent over some papers, working. I walked in, confused. “Has Mother talked to you?” Maybe she hadn’t told him about her cancer.
He looked up. “Yes, she did. She’ll be starting treatment with the best doctor in Chicago next week.”
“Oh, okay.” I paused, hoping for something else from Father but he watched me without a hint of emotion on his face. “I was thinking that Mother needs the support of her family now more than ever. Of her whole family.”
Father raised his eyebrows. “And?”
“I think we should invite Gianna to our Christmas party. She and Mother haven’t seen each other in a long time. I’m sure Mother would be very happy to see Gianna again.”
Father’s face darkened. “I won’t have that whore in my house. Maybe Matteo has forgiven her and even married her despite her transgressions but I’m not that kind.”
No, kind definitely wasn’t a word I’d use for my father. “But Mother needs every bit of support she can get.”
“No, and that’s my last word,” he growled. “And your mother doesn’t want people to know about her sickness. They’d only start to wonder if we invited Gianna. We’ll act as if nothing is wrong. You won’t even tell your sisters or anyone else, do you understand?”
I nodded. But how could I keep that kind of secret from everyone?
***
The house was decorated beautifully for our Christmas party. Everything was perfect. The scent of roast beef and truffled mashed potatoes carried through the rooms, but I couldn’t enjoy it. Mother had spent yesterday and the majority of this morning throwing up because of her treatment. With several layers of make-up, you couldn’t tell how pale she was but I knew. Only Father and I knew. Even Fabi didn’t have a clue.
Aria and Luca arrived only minutes before the other guests. They stayed in a hotel anyway, so it wasn’t too hard to keep Mother’s state from them. Aria smiled brightly when she saw me and hugged me. “God, Lily. You look so beautiful.”
I smiled tightly. I’d been so excited when I’d found the silver dress a few weeks ago because it made me feel grown-up and accentuated my curves in just the right way, but today my excitement over something like a piece of clothing felt ridiculous.
Aria pulled away and searched my face. “Is everything okay?”
I nodded quickly and turned my attention to Luca who’d waited patiently behind my sister for his turn. He gave me a quick hug. It still felt strange to have him greet me that way. “Father is still in his office and Mother is in the kitchen,” I explained. At least I hoped Mother wasn’t in the bathroom, throwing up again.
Luca walked past me and my gaze landed on Romero who’d been hidden behind Luca’s massive frame. My eyes widened at the sight of him. I hadn’t expected him to come. Last year Luca had come alone with Aria. After all, he was more than capable to protect her.
“Hello,” I said casually, sounding way more composed than I felt. I hadn’t quite gotten over my crush on Romero but I realized with relief that I wasn’t a quivering mess around him anymore. The last few months and weeks had changed me.
Romero
Luca had business to conduct with Scuderi and Dante Cavallaro; that was the only reason why I’d come to Chicago with them at all. And now as I stood in the doorway to the Scuderi mansion, staring at Liliana, I wondered if I shouldn’t have come up with an excuse. The last time I’d seen Lily she’d been a girl, and while she still wasn’t a woman, she’d grown a lot. She was fucking stunning. It was difficult not to look at her. It was easy to forget that there were still a few months until she’d be of age, easy to forget that she was way out of my league.
She tilted her head in greeting and stepped back. Where had the blushing, flirting girl gone? I had to admit I was sad that she wasn’t giving me her flirty smile, though it had always bothered me in the past.
I followed Luca and Aria into the house. I could hear Lily’s steps close behind me, could smell her flowery perfume and even see her slender frame from the corner of my eye. It took a lot of restraint not to glimpse over my shoulder to get another good look at her.
I spent the next couple of hours watching her discreetly as I pretended to be busy guarding Aria, not that I had much to do anyway. But the more I watched Lily, the more I realized that something was wrong. Whenever she thought nobody was paying attention to her, she seemed to deflate, her smile falling, her shoulders slumping. She was a good actress when she gave it her full attention but her few moments of inattentiveness were enough for me. Over the years as a bodyguard, I’d learned to be aware of even the smallest signs.
When she left the living room and didn’t come back, worry overcame me. But she wasn’t my responsibility. Aria was. I glanced at Luca’s wife. She was deep in conversation with her mother and Valentina Cavallaro. I excused myself. She’d be safe here. Luca was just across the room in what looked like an argument with Dante and Scuderi.
Once I found myself in the lobby, I hesitated. I wasn’t sure where Liliana had gone and I could hardly search the entire house for her. If someone found me, they might think I was spying for Luca. A sound from the corridor to my right attracted my attention and after having made sure that I was alone, I followed it until I caught sight of Liliana. She leaned against the wall, her head was thrown back, her eyes closed. I could tell she was trying to keep it together, and yet even like that, she was a sight to behold. Fucking gorgeous. One day a man would be very luck to be married to her.
The idea didn’t sit well with me but I didn’t linger on my strange reaction. I walked toward her, making sure to make my steps audible so she knew she wasn’t alone anymore. She tensed, her eyes fluttering open but when she spotted me, she relaxed again and turned away. I wasn’t sure what to make from her reaction to my presence. I stopped a couple of steps from her. My gaze traveled over her long, lean legs, then I quickly moved on to her face. “Liliana, are you okay? You’ve been gone for a long time.”
“Why do you insist on calling me Liliana when everyone always calls me Lily?” She opened her eyes again and smiled bitterly. She had fucking amazing blue eyes. “Did my sister tell you to watch me?” she asked accusingly.
As if I needed someone to tell me. It had been almost impossible to keep my eyes off Liliana tonight. “No, she didn’t,” I said simply.
Her blue eyes held confusion, then she turned her face to the side, leaving me to stare at her profile. Her chin wobbled but she swallowed and her expression evened out. “Don’t you need to watch Aria?”
“Luca is there,” I said. I moved a bit closer, too close. Lily’s perfume wafted into my nose, made me want to bury my face in her hair. God, I was losing my freaking mind. “I can tell that something is wrong. Why don’t you tell me?”
Lily narrowed her eyes. “Why? I’m not your responsibility. And last time we saw each other you didn’t seem to like me very much.”
