The Black Effect 2, page 21
I had finally talked to Amir, which lifted my spirits drastically. I’d taken Nadir’s advice and held off on telling him about my attack. He seemed to be doing well and promised that once he was back from deployment, he would consider getting out of the Air Force. That news left me ecstatic since I missed my brother so much.
Surprisingly, I was still staying in Nadir’s guest house and wasn’t ready to go. I liked being back here even though I swore I would never step foot on this property again. Raye was also glad that I was back. I couldn’t lie and say that I hadn’t missed her when I left Nadir. She had been my bestie, and I was elated to know that our bond hadn’t been affected by me and Nadir’s divorce. I hadn’t seen Jaide since she stormed out that day and nothing made me more satisfied than not being bothered by her simple ass. Sometimes, I questioned what Canton ever saw in her. She was fake, vindictive, and annoying as hell. Speaking of Canton, I hadn’t heard from him since I went to see him at his coffee shop. Every time I asked Nadir about him and his cousins, he never answered my question. He usually would change the subject as if I didn’t ask anything.
A knock at the door interrupted my editing session. I got up, walked over to the door, and opened it. My lips lifted into a smile without my permission. Nadir stood on the other side, looking good enough to eat. Those dark-hued eyes engulfed me with so much intensity, it brought me back to the days where I was his and he was mine. His hair and beard looked to be freshly cut. He was dressed down, and although I loved when he wore those suits that were tailored to his brawny frame, I loved to see him in his casual wear. He donned a black Trapstar sweater, black Balmain jeans and Retro 2 Jordans.
“Can I help you?” I asked.
“Let me in.”
I stepped to the side to allow him access inside the room. My eyes closed, inhaling the scent of his cologne as he bypassed me.
“What were you doing?” he asked, breaking me out of the trance his fragrance had left me in.
“Um, working. Why?”
“I'm hungry,” he announced.
I snorted. “Nadir, you have an entire staff at your beck and call. Why are you telling me that?”
“That was kind of like a hint to get you to go out to dinner with me.” he smirked.
My brows hiked. “Dinner? With you?”
“Yeah, is that a problem?” he quipped.
“I mean, no. You do know that having me and Jaide in the same place would be a problem, right?”
“Well, it’s a good thing I didn’t invite her. I want us to go to dinner. Just me and you.”
I was shocked again. Normally, when we were together, we never went out to dinner alone. We were always with Raye and Jaide and rarely shared any alone time together, except during sex and our anniversary.
“Just me and you?” I questioned just to be sure.
“Yeah, nobody else.”
“Sure.”
I was excited as hell, and I didn’t know why. I mean, this was Nadir, the man I left months ago because in my mind, he had made me unhappy. I hated the polygamy marriage I had inserted myself in and wanted a life without the man I pledged to be with forever. As of now, my outlook on life was different. I knew who I was as a woman. I was more vocal about the things I desired. Accountability was also something I had to learn to accept as well. Mentally, I was a new person, and Nadir seemed to be as well.
I grabbed my camo jacket and threw it on. I already was wearing a white t-shirt and light denim jeans. To complete my outfit, I put my feet into some black strappy sandals.
“I'm ready.”
Nadir’s eyes traveled from the top of my head down to my feet. I knew that look and determined he liked what he saw.
“Come on,” he said.
I followed him outside where he led me to his McLaren. Nadir opened the door, and I slid into the passenger seat. When I was securely inside the car, it felt like my heart had burst. Only this was an explosion of excitement. I felt like I was going on a date with a man I had just met and not someone I had history with.
Once Nadir joined me inside, he started the engine and drove off. Our ride was silent, and I was comfortable with that because I was trying to decide where this sudden rupture of anticipation had come from. I hadn’t felt this exhilarated in so long that I couldn’t pinpoint the exact source for my excitement.
“Do you feel like eating French food?” he asked.
“Sure.”
Nadir pulled up to a new French restaurant that was downtown called Nourriture de Passion. The valet opened my door and helped me out the car. Nadir grabbed my hand, and I swear, my chest tightened. We hadn’t touched this intimately in months. It seemed to be an innocent gesture, but I didn’t perceive it that way. To me, him holding my hand was reigniting a fire that had been extinguished months ago. We entered the restaurant and were ushered down a hallway where there was a private dinner room.
“I should’ve known you would set up something like this,” I teased.
“I don’t like people in my face while I eat, so yeah.” he shrugged.
The ambiance was cool, but the aesthetic was flawless. The whitewashed brick gave the walls a grungy feel. The bow windows were trimmed in matte black paint. Instead of there being chairs there were two vintage velvet sofas that sat on the side of a table that was covered in a linen cloth. I looked up and marveled at the vines that were wrapped around the wooden beams in the ceilings.
“I love the décor,” I gushed as I sat down.
Nadir looked around before taking his seat. “Yeah, it’s fly.”
“Fly? This is bomb. It reminds me of that restaurant we visited when we went to France. What's the name of it again?”
“Le Jules Verne.”
“Yeah, that one. I like it here.”
The waitress came inside and provided us with some warm Cheddar Dill Gougères and water. She agreed to give us some time while we looked over the menu.
“I like your hair in braids,” Nadir complimented me.
I smiled coyly, touching my loose plaits. “Thank you.”
“Do you want to know my favorite hairstyle on you?”
“Yes, what is it?”
“I like when you wear it natural and it be wild all over your head. I feel like when you're in your natural state, that’s when your beauty shines the most.”
“Is that why I used to catch you staring at me in the morning time?”
He chuckled. “Yeah, but I always hoped you never caught me doing that. I didn’t want you to feel like I was a creep.”
“Too late. I already feel that way,” I joked.
Nadir licked his lips and leaned forward. “I brought you here because I need to tell you something.”
I eyed him with skepticism before I asked, “Is it something bad?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. I can’t predict how you take shit sometimes.”
His answer had me on the edge a bit.
“Okay, what is it?”
“So, the first thing I want to tell you is that you don’t have to worry about looking over your shoulder anymore. The people that hurt you will never hurt you again.”
My hand flew to my chest. “Really? How can you be so sure?”
He gave me a knowing look. “You really want me to answer that question?”
I swallowed hard, pondering his query. Was I ready to know what had specifically happened to those men, who left me with scars that would probably never heal?
“No, I don’t… what about Canton? Was he a part of it?”
Nadir sighed and surprised me by shaking his head. “No, he didn’t know what his people were on. But don’t get it twisted, he’s still a snake because he knew who you were before you even met him.”
“Are you serious? He told you that?”
“He didn’t have to,” Nadir spat. “I knew what the fuck it was when I caught you with his ass. He ain't shit just like I thought, but you had to figure that out for yourself.”
I suddenly felt foolish for thinking that me and Canton had met by chance. He was convincing and because I felt like he had been genuine, I believed what he was saying. I hated having to look at this I told you so look that Nadir was giving me.
“Okay, you were right,” I griped.
He grinned. “Thanks for acknowledging that.”
“Oh, whatever. I know your ass is enjoying this.”
“Enjoying?” he cracked up. “Girl, I'm loving this shit. I saw what it was with him from a mile away. That nigga could never fool me.”
“Okay, Nadir,” I groaned. “What else do you have to tell me?”
He smirked, which made a simper appear on my face.
“The second thing I want to say is… Jaide left me.”
My eyes gawked at him as my jaw dropped. I looked at the austere expression on his face, which showcased how serious he was.
“She left as in for the week or for good?” I asked just to be clear.
“She left me for good,” he confirmed.
“But why?”
“She wanted you to leave, and she gave me an ultimatum.”
I was stunned as I stared at him in silence. I couldn’t stand Jaide at all, but I knew how much Nadir loved her. I would never want to come between their union despite my disdain for her.
“Listen, Nadir, I did─”
“It’s not your fault, Amai. I never made a choice between you two. She wanted to leave, and she did just that. I wasn’t about to hold her ass hostage, so I let her go.”
I sensed the sadness in his tone, and that made me feel empathy for him.
“Are you sad about her leaving?”
Nadir didn’t respond right away. He just sat in deep thought with his bottom lip trapped between his teeth.
“I am sad… because now Zain has to grow up without his mother and father in the same house. I never wanted that for my kids, and Jaide knew that. When she got pregnant, I made it very clear that my kids would always grow up with their parents living under the same roof. Now, my son has to suffer because Jaide was on bullshit.”
“Will she be taking Zain with her?”
His face grimaced at my question. “Hell no. My son will never live in a house outside of the one he’s been in.”
“But what about what she wants as his mother? I'm sure she doesn’t want to live without her kid, too.”
“Well, that’s the fucking sacrifice she made when she carried her ass out of my house.”
Nadir’s controlling nature was emerging as we delved deeper into this topic. I didn’t mean to make him upset, but I wanted to know if he planned to keep Jaide away from Zain. Like I said, I couldn’t stand the bitch, but she was a good mother and didn’t deserve to be isolated from her child.
“I'm not going to keep her from Zain, Amai. I'm not that kind of man,” he confirmed, reading my mind. “It’s just that he’s going to live with me and that’s something I'm not going to compromise on.”
I nodded, silently dropping the discussion on where Zain would live. It was pointless to continue the conversation and I didn’t want to antagonize him since he was so passionate about his stance.
“So, you're down to one wife, huh?”
He bobbed his head. “Yeah, and as crazy as this may sound, I'm okay with that.”
“So, you're not going to go look for another one?”
Nadir’s dark orbs gazed at me for what felt like an eternity. His eyes were so fierce that it caused chill bumps to sprout on my skin.
“No, I'm not going to look for someone new,” he finally answered. “There's no need.”
I accepted his response with a nod as the waitress came back in the room with a bottle of red wine. She poured us both a glass before we ordered our meals, which consisted of coq au vin, cognac shrimp with beurre blanc, escargot, and crepes for dessert.
“So, I hear you're going out of town this week.”
I sipped on the wine and replied, “Yes, the biggest beauty event of the year is in LA, and I was invited. So, I'm going.”
“I would like to go with you, if you don’t mind.”
Okay, first we go on a date alone, then he tells me that Jaide left him, and he’s okay with it. Now, he was telling me that he wanted to go to an event that I knew he had no interest in.
“Nadir… is something wrong with you?”
He cocked his head before bursting out into a fit of laughter. I couldn’t help but join in since his laugh was so infectious.
“Why does something have to be wrong with me?”
“Because you’ve never gone with me to my booked events. You would always send Raye or Jaide with me and tell us to check in.”
“I know and that was the past. I would like to go with you, so I can see you in your element.”
“And you're serious?”
“I would have never asked if I wasn’t.”
“Hmm,” I hummed, taking another sip of wine. “Well, sure you can come.”
“Cool.”
“...This is going to be weird,” I blurted out.
“Why?”
“Because you have never showed any interest in my job. Also, we haven’t traveled together since… you know… when we were married.”
“We’re cool, right?”
“Yes.”
“Well, then it shouldn’t be weird. I'm comfortable with you, and you should be comfortable with me. Shit is all good between us.”
I smiled at Nadir’s simplistic way of breaking down our companionship. Oddly, I was at ease in his presence. Our conversation flowed effortlessly, and I didn’t have to worry about sharing the spotlight. This had been one of the best night’s I’d ever experienced with Nadir. He wasn’t in his usual controlling nature, and he seemed more laid back than ever. If this was his new and improved attitude, I wouldn’t mind hanging out with him more often.
Our food arrived and our conversation continued on without any speedbumps. We laughed, joked on each other, and talked about things we hadn’t been able to before. I wasn’t sure why our conversations had been limited when we were married, but I was glad that now, nothing was forced between us.
After dinner, we drove back to Nadir’s house and were now walking side by side down to the guest house. The air was clear of mugginess as the nighttime sky glowed due to the full moon.
“Now, that I know the men that attacked me have been handled, I’ll probably go to the new place that you set up for me.”
“You sure?” he asked.
“Yeah, I feel like I've stayed here long enough, and I don’t want to wear out my welcome.”
Nadir smacked his lips. “Amai, stop talking crazy. You're not wearing out your welcome. You can either go to the condo or you can stay in the guest house. I don’t really care.”
“That’s nice to know.”
When we approached the front door, I turned to him. He was looking down at me with his hands tucked in his pockets. I wondered how our night would end. Would it be a simple goodbye? A hug? Or if my imagination served me correctly, would he seal our outing with a kiss.
A kiss? I know I'm trippin’…
I questioned if I truly wanted to take it there with Nadir. Just three months ago, I hated this man’s entire existence. He was my enemy, a man I proclaimed I would never communicate with. As of now, I didn’t share those feelings anymore. I was gazing into the eyes of the one, who I still held feelings for. Granted, they were buried deep, but they were still present.
“Thanks for spending time with me. I thought your ass was going to say no at first,” he chuckled.
“Why is that?” I quizzed.
He gave a half-hearted shrug. “I don’t know. I just never know what I'm going to get with you.”
“Well, I surprised you, so you're welcome.”
Silence engulfed us once again. Nadir leaned in and my eyes closed, hoping that this kiss would be one to remember. His scent sauntered into my senses as his body heat covered my face. I was ready to devour those lips of his. My heart thumped wildly inside my chest. I braced myself for takeoff but was sadly disappointed when I felt his lips on my forehead.
Damn, I was let down…
But I wouldn’t voice it because that would mean I wanted the kiss, and I couldn’t afford for Nadir to know that. He had just confessed to being okay with one wife, and I couldn’t put all of my eggs in his basket. We were no longer a couple. There was no marriage between us, and maybe that was the way it should’ve been.
“I’ll see you tomorrow.”
I nodded before he opened the door, and I walked inside. I felt dismayed but quickly suppressed the feeling. I wouldn’t allow my secret desire to overshadow how great this night had been with Nadir. Even though my lips were yearning for his, my soul was full and that was a gratifying feeling.
“Have you spoken to your cousins? I've been calling them for the last week, and I haven’t heard a thing. I'm worried, Canton.”
I shook my head as I listened to my mother rant about not being in contact with Zay and Reem. I knew the truth, but I could never let her in on what happened. She would never understand my stance on why I gave them up.
“Nah, I haven’t heard from them, but you know how they are. They be gone and then the next minute, they pop right back up.”
“No, this isn't like them. They always keep in contact with me. I think I'm going to file a missing person’s report.”
I paused, trying to think of a reply that would ease her worries.
“Why don’t you just give it a few days before you do that?”
“No, I can’t wait any further. They could be in trouble while I'm sitting here waiting for them to show up. I'm going to the police station, today.”
I sighed while rubbing my hand down my fade. “Alright, well, keep me posted.”
“I will, baby. Goodbye.”
I ended the call, feeling like I was the worst son in the world. I knew Zay and Reem’s disappearance would probably hurt my mother since she had raised them, but I couldn’t let them bring us down. I could’ve been killed because of them, and when I thought about that fact, my guilt disappeared.
