The Black Effect 2, page 18
I blew smoke out my mouth before I asked, “Who is it?”
“I would rather you come and see yourself. They say that its important.”
Instantly, I thought of Amai and wondered if it was her. “Alright, I'm on my way.”
I put my blunt out and made a U-turn. I then drove toward my mother’s house, hoping that Amai had finally come to see me. I thought she would’ve called but seeing her would definitely be better since I had been worried sick about her. After fifteen minutes, I had finally arrived. I got out, put the key into the door and walked into the house. My feet halted when I noticed who was sitting on the couch. She looked at me with eyes I couldn’t read before I closed the door.
“What are you doing here?” I asked, puzzled by her presence here.
My mother was standing near the fireplace with her lips pursed and arms crossed over her chest.
“She claims she wants to talk,” Monica sassed.
Jaide cleared her throat. “Yeah, I just want to talk, Canton.”
I couldn’t wrap my mind around her being here. I hadn’t seen Jaide in years. We hadn’t talked since she left me for her husband, and I wondered why, after all this time, she would be here wanting to talk.
“Talk about what? I ain't seen you in I don’t know how long, so why you need to suddenly talk?”
Jaide glanced at Monica before returning her stare to me. “Is it possible if we can talk in private?”
Monica scoffed. “Now you have the nerve to want some privacy. Girl, please. My son has been doing great without you, so don’t come crawling back now that you see he’s a successful business owner. He doesn’t need someone like you trying to creep back into his life.”
My mother’s disdain for Jaide had turned into hate. I understood it, but at the same time, I did want to know why she had appeared after all these years, requesting to talk to me.
“Follow me out to the back,” I told Jaide.
She stood, and I couldn’t help but notice how her body had filled out more than when I was with her. Jaide had always been thick with a big ass, but now, I could spot her backside from the front. I led us to the back, and we sat near the shade on the patio set.
“I know me coming here was a little out of character, but I didn’t know where else to find you,” she spoke.
“So, why are you here?” I asked, avoiding small talk.
“I, uh… I don’t know, honestly. I felt like we should talk, especially after the way we broke up.”
“Five years?” I spat. “You really think we should talk when it’s been five years since we’ve been together? Come on, Jaide stop bullshittin’ me.”
I was beginning to get upset because I felt like she had another agenda that she didn’t want to reveal. She had married someone else, and I had taken the L and moved on with my life. There was no need to discuss shit, especially when five years had passed by.
“I know, it seems as though five years is a long time, but I had this need to talk to you.”
“What's the real reason you're here? You and your husband must be beefin’, right now. Like what is it?”
She licked her full lips. “I'm leaving him.”
I rolled my eyes not, even surprised by her revelation. “I should’ve known.”
“But that’s not what made me come to seek you.”
I laughed. “You're so full of shit, Jaide. Actually, you’ve always been full of shit.”
She scoffed. “Wow, tell me how you really feel.”
“Don’t get fucking fresh with me,” I warned. “Because I really don’t have shit to say to you.”
“I know, I fucked you over. I get it, Canton.”
“Fucked me over? Nah, let’s call it what it is. You broke my heart by leaving me for ol’ boy. You just shitted on me as if we didn’t spend years together. Me and you made a plan and you threw that shit away for somebody, who waved some money in your face.”
She frowned immediately. “Are you trying to say I only married Nadir for money?”
“Uh, yeah,” I replied sarcastically. “Don’t try to act like you fell in love with the nigga. Ain't no way you would enter an arrangement like that without getting something out of the deal.”
“Hold the fuck up! I am not one of those women, who go after men for money.”
I waved my hand at her attempt to act as though she wasn’t someone who fucked with men with money.
“Yeah, whatever.”
“I'm serious, Canton. I didn’t marry Nadir for his money. I saw that he was a great man, and I wanted to be with him.”
“So, I wasn’t a great man to your ass?”
“Yes, you were. I realize now that I may have made a big mistake.”
I groaned. “Jaide, the door is closed. I will never allow you back into my life, ever.”
“But you’ll fuck with someone like Amai, huh?”
I smirked at the envy that was oozing from her pores. I was aware of the beef between Amai and Jaide, and now, I was beginning to see that this random visit may not have been fueled because she was leaving her husband.
“What does Amai have to do with anything? Why are you bringing her up to me?”
“Because she's no better than me. She's not loyal, and she won’t love you. That girl is fucked up in the head, so if you're banking on her replacing me, you're going to be sadly disappointed.”
“Replacing you? I haven’t thought about you in years.”
Jaide gave me a knowing look. “Really, Canton?”
“Yeah, really. The fuck you think this is? You ain't shit to me and you haven’t been in years.”
“Well, I've thought about you. Actually, I've never stopped thinking about you.”
My eyes engulfed Jaide with so much intensity that I didn’t even blink. This girl had become so self-absorbed that it was disgusting. Judging by her speech, she probably found out that me and Amai were friends and got jealous. This had nothing to do with her missing me or her leaving her husband. She didn’t want Amai to have me and that was the reason for this impromptu visit.
“Keep it a buck, Jaide. You don’t like me being friends with Amai, do you?”
“No, I don’t.”
I was surprised by her honesty because I assumed, she would lie to save face. “Why?”
“Because she ain't solid and besides, she's been with Nadir this entire time.”
Right away, I cocked my head while processing her words. I had been worried sick ever since Amai’s father had come to inform me that she had been attacked. I’d tried every possible way to get in contact with her and to know that she had been with her ex-husband left me irate.
“What do you mean she's been with Nadir?”
“That’s where she's been. They’ve been bonding ever since she got her ass whooped. If you were hoping that she would choose you, I must tell you that it won’t happen. Amai loves Nadir, and he loves her. You won’t be able to compete with that.”
Jaide’s words were like salt to my open wound. I had invested a lot of time into Amai with hopes that eventually, she would finally want to take our friendship to the next level. It angered me that she was now with her ex, who had hurt her. I can’t lie, this shit had me in my feelings.
“You can leave now, Jaide.”
She twisted her lips. “Why do I have to leave?”
“Because we don’t have a reason to talk. You don’t belong to me; you never have. So, leave because there is nothing left between us.”
Her face fell somber as she sighed. “I understand, Canton. You don’t fuck with me anymore because of the way I left our relationship. But just know that I still love you. I still think you're a great man, and I regret the choice I made. You know they say hindsight is 20/20 and let me tell you, I wish I could go back and make better decisions.”
“Bye, Jaide.” Her speech did nothing for me. I still didn’t want her in my life.
“Okay, well, can I at least have your number?”
“No.”
“Why?”
“Because you don’t need it.”
“But I do, Canton,” she whined. “Well, how about I put my number in your phone? That way you can call whenever you want to talk to me.”
I thought about her suggestion for a second. I knew I wouldn’t call Jaide, but somehow, I ended up sliding my phone across the table. She happily punched her number in and gave it back to me.
“I know I'm not your favorite person, but just know I still fuck with you.”
“Whatever,” I mumbled, watching her get up from her seat.
My eyes went straight to her breasts and then her hips. My mind remembered the times when I would be deep into her center, providing her body with immense pleasure. I missed seeing the way her fat ass would slam against my pelvis while I fucked her senseless. Those were the days when I thought we were in love, but Jaide had deceived me. She made me think that we would have this great life. She promised me we would be together forever until that wasn’t the case anymore.
She grinned. “Hopefully, I’ll talk to you soon.”
I didn’t say a thing as Jaide walked back into the house. Soon after, my mother came out to the yard with a wicked look on her face.
“Canton, I'm telling you right fucking now that you better not fall for that trick’s trap. She's only come to ruin your life. She sees how good you’ve been doing without her, and now she wants to slither her way back. You better not let her back in, I swear.”
“Mama chill out. I'm not going to go back to Jaide.”
“That’s what your mouth says, but I saw the look in your eyes when you noticed it was her on the couch.”
“That’s because I was shocked to see her, damn. She was the last person I was expecting to see come to your house. That doesn’t mean I want her ass back.”
“Hmmph,” Monica grunted. “I'm just saying. She's a snake, and I don’t want her nowhere near you. You're better than that skeezer, so don’t allow her to bring you back into her web of deceit.”
I tuned my mother out as my thoughts went to Amai. I was angered that she was back in the presence of Nadir. With the way she had explained how he hurt her, I thought she would never speak to him again. I was salty that instead of allowing me to help her heal, she ran back to the person she said she would never fuck with again.
It was in the middle of the night as I sat propped up on my laptop. Ever since the attack and because I refused to take any more pain pills, I was having trouble sleeping. Either I was too scared to sleep or when I did fall into a slumber, nightmares would emerge, causing me to stay up. I had gotten so scared that I asked the nurse that Nadir had hired to check on me every hour. She agreed, and I was thankful for that.
Although some weeks had passed, I still had a long road of recovery ahead of me. My facial swelling had gone down drastically, and I was still left with a couple contusions. But my arm was still wrapped up and in a sling. The back pain hadn’t subsided one bit, and I was scared that I wouldn’t be able to use my arm the same way again. Nadir had set me up with physical therapy, and I was slated to start the following week. I prayed that my strength was recovered in my arm because I didn’t know how I was going to survive with low mobility in one limb.
I went through most of my emails, responding to businesses who wanted to work with me. I also uploaded a video just to ensure I didn’t lose any momentum on my channel. For the last two months, I had stuck to a strict schedule and filmed on a daily basis. I was so thankful for the many videos I had ready to upload because I knew I would be out of commission for a while.
I was browsing through my videos when I heard my door open. Startled, I quickly turned my head and noticed Nadir easing inside. I breathed a sigh of relief as he smirked at me.
“You scared the shit out of me. You can’t creep in here like that. You know I'm shaken up,” I chastised him.
He said nothing as he stood by the door with his hands in his pockets. His business attire had been switched out for a navy-blue Black Pyramid jogging suit, some white socks and white Forces.
“Why aren’t you sleep?” he asked.
I pulled my eyes away from him and back to my screen. “I couldn’t sleep, so I decided to do some work.”
“Work?” he shot, coming to take a seat in the chair next to my bed. “Your ass needs to be trying to heal. You shouldn’t even be thinking about no work.”
“Well, I'm a one-woman show, so I have to make sure I keep up with my channel. Besides, I'm doing fine, so it’s not a big deal.”
“Your face looks better,” he noted.
“Thank God,” I muttered.
“But that hair though.”
I chuckled. “You know what? Fuck you. Raye is calling the stylist over tomorrow, so you can kiss my ass.”
“What? I didn’t say shit,” he feigned innocence.
“I know what you were eluding to, and I don’t care.”
I reached for my matted tresses that were pulled into a bun on top of my head. I knew I looked a mess, but that shit was the least of my worries now.
“I might go for a change like braids, or maybe even have her dye it.”
He smacked his lips. “Why would you do some stupid shit like that?”
“Because I need a different look, and I don’t want the people who attacked me to come back and finish me off. My hair is too much of an inconvenience and it doesn’t help that it has this naturally wild color.”
“You won’t be touched ever again, Amai. I'm going to make sure of that and leave your damn hair alone. You should never want to change the color. That’s what makes you unique.”
I stared at him, taking in the annoyed expression on his face. As twisted as this sounded, I always thought Nadir was the sexiest when he was either irritated or angry. When we were married, I often annoyed him on purpose, so that I could get aroused and pounce on him.
“Why aren’t you sleep, Nadir? I'm sure if Jaide knew you were back here with me; she would probably call the police.”
He snorted. “I'm not worried about her and neither should you.”
“Oh, I'm not, and you need to keep her away from me. Tell her don’t come back here talking her shit.”
“She came over here?” he inquired.
“Yeah, and she tried to get under my skin, but her ass was the one that ended up storming out. Simple bitch.” I chuckled.
“Have you spoken to Amir?” he changed the subject.
“No, and I'm hoping he Skypes me soon, so I can tell him what happened to me.”
I was still bummed that I had to wait for my brother to video chat me. I wanted to call him so badly and hear his voice, so he could assure me that things would be okay.
“You're going to have him worried over there. He needs to be focused.”
“But he should know what happened to me,” I debated.
“I agree, but you don’t know what's going on over there with him, especially since Trump is trying to start a fucking war. Maybe hold off until it’s time for him to come home or until he gets here.”
“I don’t know, Nadir. My parents may beat me to the punch.”
“Oh, yeah, I forgot about their slow asses,” he joked.
I cocked my head. “Are we speaking on parents?”
He smirked. “Yeah, I am. Your parents ain't shit and before you say something, I know my mama ain't shit either.”
“Oh, okay, ‘cause I was about to say.”
“You were about to say what?”
“I was going to say Lena is the worst human being on the planet. And because Ali is so amazing, I think you got your fucked-up ways from her.”
Nadir narrowed his eyes at me as I tried to hold my laugh in. He didn’t look pleased with my comment, and I prepared myself for his wrath.
“Damn, why do you keep shitting on me like that?”
“I'm not shitting on you, Nadir. I was just making an observation.”
“You know what?” He leaned forward. “If I was this fucked-up man, like you claim, I would’ve left your ass for dead. I wouldn’t have brought you back to my house, and I damn sure wouldn’t have hired a full staff to care for you. I'm not perfect and I've done shit to you that I regret, but you could’ve been cursed with someone that’s worse than me.”
I swallowed hard, allowing his words to sink in. He was right, Nadir had gone out of his way for me when he didn’t have to. I wasn’t his wife, and he had no obligation to me, so instead of shitting on him, I should have been thanking him.
“That was a terrible thing for me to say. I apologize, and I want to thank you for making sure I'm being taken care of. Your generosity is much appreciated.”
His eyes expanded in shock. “Damn, you're really apologizing for something and not playing victim. I see your growth.”
I kissed my teeth. “Really, Nadir?”
“What do you mean, really? Don’t act like that wasn’t your MO. You never took accountability and always acted like you were a victim of some shit you had control over.”
I pressed my lips together, trying to think of a comeback, but I didn’t have one. I wasn’t the best wife to him, and I had to accept that reality.
“You're right. I used to be like that, but now that I've been by myself and had time to think, I'm no longer that girl.”
“That’s what's up. We both needed to change,” he acknowledged.
“You wanna know something,” I said, sliding my laptop to my right.
“What?”
“Since we’ve split, I realized that I had a lot of growing up to do. I went from a restricted household to a controlling household, and I didn’t really know who I was as a woman. So, when we were married, and I said that I was unhappy, it wasn’t because of you. I was unhappy because of myself. Of course you weren’t perfect, but it was unfair to put all of my unhappiness on your shoulders. This time spent away from you, my parents, and everyone else has been beneficial for me. I'm able to get to know me and spend time with the woman I've become. I hate that our marriage ended, but I'm kind of glad it happened because I wouldn’t have been able to become who I am.”
My divorce had been a blessing in disguise because I had been able to grow without Nadir by my side. It was a painful experience, but it was necessary for me to move on in the next direction in my life. I was more mature and made better decisions. No longer did I think like a teenager, and I now made choices that a twenty-eight-year-old woman should make.
