The Secrets of a Sin, page 25
He was doing this for me, but he was also doing this for himself. He wanted to prove that he could be submissive to me. That once in a blue moon, when the stars are fucking aligned perfectly, that I could take what I wanted from him, and he would gladly let me.
“I want this forever.” I groan as my tits bounce in his face, and my skin dampens in sweat.
“Forever and more.” He growls back, watching me closely as if taking in every movement I make. His grip on my ass tightens even more, and soon, I’m not the only one frantically chasing that high. Our thrusts became sloppy and messy, but we were both too far gone to care.
“Fucking Christ, Charlotte, don’t stop.” He bounces me up and down on him until the first signs of an intense orgasm strike my core. The wet sounds of our juices intermingling cause my pussy to tighten and squeeze around him like a vice.
“Ahh!” I start to detonate, letting his movements take over and completely obliterate my senses.
“That’s right, squeeze my fucking cock.” He groans as I lose it. Gripping both shoulders, I ride the wave on a scream.
Thrust after powerful thrust, I surrender to him. I let him fill me with everything he has and more until we’re one.
One person. One heart. One fucking soul.
22
CHARLOTTE
I spent the night with Arsen, snuggled into his too-tight embrace that I wouldn’t trade in for the world. To some, it may have been uncomfortable, but to me, it was warmly reassuring. He didn't just want me for the night. He wanted me to stay.
Forever.
Our relationship was unhealthy as it was twisted, but our obsession with one another was undeniable. We helped each other in that which we lacked, but it wasn’t just physical between us. We delved into each other's minds and implanted ourselves deep into the lobes of each other’s brains until our every waking thought revolved around us.
But was love ever going to be a possibility for us?
Was what we had already a form of fucked up love that we hadn’t labeled yet?
Whatever it was, I didn't want it to end. I couldn’t let it go.
Glancing over at the window, the sky was still dark, but something was on my mind, and I couldn’t fall back asleep. Arsen knew about my past. He knew about my addiction, the video of me, my weakness, and yet, he hasn’t told me his. Granted, Kurt told me everything at the funeral, but it wasn’t the same. I wanted to hear Arsen admit it to me. I wanted his truth, his emotions, his voice as he confessed everything to me.
But I couldn’t force him to tell him.
“I know you’re awake.” His arms tighten around me as I close my eyes and snuggle into his embrace. “What’s wrong?” He places his chin on the curve of my neck and buries his nose into my hair.
“Can I ask you something?” I whisper as my hands clasp the arm that’s secured around me.
Sighing, he exhales as if he knows what I’m going to ask. “What, angel?”
Taking my thumb, I rub along his skin, already starting to soothe him before he even speaks. “How did you get your scars?”
I expect him to flinch, but he doesn’t. Instead, he places his mouth on the flesh of my neck and gives me a light peck before answering. “I thought I was born into a loving family.” He sighs. “At first, I was. Both parents worked, loved each other. Just your average fucking family, I thought. But then something changed after Phoebe was born. They cared less and less about us. I didn’t even realize they were depressed until one day they both killed themselves.”
I try not to gasp in horror, but it’s hard.
“The only other family we had was our Uncle Joe from my mom's side.” The mention of his name has his arm tightening around me. “A piece of shit farmer who did nothing but drink and sit on his ass all day.” He grumbles. “He took us in with the idea of being his fucking slaves. Barely providing for us. We cooked, cleaned, and did everything his lazy ass was too privileged to do. First, it started with grabbing our arms when we messed up, but then eventually it turned into beatings.”
Don’t cry, Charlotte. Don’t cry.
“We were locked in a basement most of our time there. Showers, food, drinks, everything was fucking earned, and if you screwed up, you didn’t eat that day or longer.”
How could someone be so cruel to children?
“I couldn’t for the life of me understand why it was happening to us. I knew most kids didn’t live this way, and yet Phoebe and I had to. I was a fucking livid eight-year-old with ideas in my head that involved blood and death.” He goes on. “At eight-fucking-years-old, I wanted to hurt him. And I knew I was going to kill the bastard after what he did to Phoebe. How he defiled her body in front of me.” I can hear the anger that still resides in him from what he saw happen to Phoebe. It scathes my heart to hear him confess, but I needed to know why he was the way he was.
“There was a shovel in the basement that was obscured by a pile of trash and other miscellaneous items. One day, I decided to grab it. I climbed up from the basement, knowing he was asleep in his chair upstairs. I walked over to his overweight body that had passed out and began bashing him in the head.” He admits. “I hit him over and over again until brain matter began to mix in with his blood. I needed to make sure the bastard was dead, so at the age of only twelve, I slammed the tip of the shovel into his skull. With all my pent-up hatred and fury towards the man who supposedly saved our lives and took us in, I finally killed our monster.”
I was crying now. As much as I tried not to, I couldn’t help it. His bravery and courage struck me hard that all I wanted to do was hold him tight and never let go. Even if he was an adult now, I wanted to save him from the evils of the world. I never want him to have to experience something like that ever again. The inhumanity, the torture a human being can inflict on two children, was as heart-wrenching as it was sickening.
“Don’t cry, angel.” He squeezes, and I spin my head around to face him.
“Arsen…” I cry, needing to touch his skin and softly rub him.
“It’s over now. My past no longer holds a grip on me, and I plan to keep it that way.” He says to calm me. “I never thought life had a purpose after enduring everything that I did. I accepted who I was and embraced it, but now everything’s changed.” I can feel his eyes bore through mine despite the darkness in the room. “I didn’t expect you to come along and invade every fucking thought of mine.”
Scooting in closer into his warm body, I reach for his face and cup his cheeks. “We found each other for a reason, Arsen, because you invade every one of my thoughts too.” I stroke his skin softly.
“Good.” He breathes while intertwining our legs and pulling me to his chest. “Now, let me hold you so I can sleep some more.”
You can hold me as long as you want.
Preferably forever.
The morning comes way faster than it should have, and I reluctantly wake Arsen up and make him take me back to school before anyone notices I was gone. Eventually, on a low growl and lots of cursing, he finally gave in.
“You seriously can’t skip one day?” He rests his hand on the back of the headrest as his eyes cast over to mine briefly.
“Not if you want me to get into serious trouble and possibly be kicked out.” I half-smile in his direction before peering out the windshield.
“Get kicked out. I don’t like you in that cursed fucking school anyway.” He smoothly shifts lanes and starts playing with the back of my head. “You can stay with me.”
My heart flutters, but I knew there was no possibility of that happening any time soon.
“I need to graduate, Arsen.” I groan. “I have to prove to myself and to others that I’m not some fucking freak.”
“You’re not a freak, Charlotte, and so help me God if you call yourself that again…” He snaps angrily as I cut in.
“It doesn't matter if I am or not. I can’t just drop out and come play house with you because you don’t like the school.” I shake my head, somewhat liking the idea of us living together and imagining all the normal couple activities we could do.
“Who said anything about playing house?” He raises a dark brow in a mischievous manner that has my interest peaking.
“I’m being serious, Arsen. I can’t just drop out and live with you.” I scoff.
“Sure you can.” He turns the steering wheel before leveling it out. “I can tell Welch you’ll no longer be attending their school, and then I can pack all your shit myself and bring it to my house.” He tells me as if it’s actually a plausible idea, and I shake my head.
“I don’t doubt you could do that, but honestly, I’m not looking to be one of those girls who rely on their boyfriend for everything.”
“Boyfriend?” He raises a brow as he eyes me deviously.
Crap, did I really just say that?
“You know what I mean.” I grunt with flushed cheeks.
“I’m more than just your fucking boyfriend.” He mumbles like he’s pissed off with the label. “I’m everything you’ll ever need, angel. And if one day you decide to run, I’ll fucking chase you.”
My core vibrates from his greedy words, and I can’t help it when a groan escapes my lips.
“That’s how devoted I am. How fucking possessed you have me.” He pulls us into the St. Catherine’s parking lot and stops beside the entrance. Putting the car in park, he shifts his eyes over to my lust-filled ones and reaches for my arms before tugging me over the center console and setting me onto his lap. Straddling each leg, I can feel his cock press against my mound, and I, on instinct, grind down. “You think I have all the power?” He asks on a tight groan as his hands seek out my ass.
Of course, he had all the power. I’d do anything he asked.
“I don’t. For the first time in my fucking life, I don’t.” He squeezes my cheeks as I grind myself slowly in his lap and let my head fall back. “You have all the power, Charlotte.”
My eyes snap open, and I see the vulnerability in his eyes. “I’m fucking powerless to you.” He confesses again, and I completely melt into him. My mouth immediately drops down onto his, and he willingly lets me take charge.
I’ve finally tamed all of Arsen.
After leaving Arsen’s car, I trek back to my room and pull out my room key.
“Where have you been?” An irritated voice manifests from behind me as I fumble with the key and drop it onto the floor. Quickly peering over my shoulder with a racing pulse, I meet Annalise’s eyes which take me in meticulously. This is the first time I’ve seen her out of the customary uniform. Dressed in a navy-blue zip-up jacket and some mesh, black shorts, she appears disheveled as if she just got out of bed. Her hair is thrown into a messy bun, and her face is void of makeup. “I came to your room last night, and you weren’t here.” She crosses her arms across her chest and continues to scowl in my direction.
Nothing good comes from those girls.
Mr. Ben’s words from yesterday replay in my head as I stare back at Annalise with hidden fear. She looks so fucking innocent and perfect that it seems almost impossible to believe she would ever cause anyone harm. How could someone so angelic-looking be so evil? It sounded beyond imagination, but they always say it’s the least expected who create the most chaos.
“I was out.” I confess, slightly annoyed by her interrogation.
“Out where?” She scoffs. “You never leave.”
Spinning fully around until I’m facing her, I stand up a little straighter and tilt my chin. “I was with a friend. Does it really matter or concern you where I was?” I question, causing her eyes to inflame.
“Friends?” She chuckles with a sinister smile on her lips. “The only friends you have are us, little mouse. We're the only ones who truly care about your wellbeing and will tell you straight up when you’re acting like a desperate whore.”
I rear back almost immediately. “What the hell are you talking about?”
She laughs darkly as her feet close the space between us, and our eyes clash. “I’m not an idiot, Charlotte. I see the way you look at Phoebe’s brother. Just like Verity and Principal Welch, you watch him as if you want to be further corrupted by darkness.” She scans me head-to-toe, lingering on the faint markings on my neck that cause her to grimace. “He’ll only hurt you.”
My chest rises and falls at her closeness, and my gaze drops to the pulse on the nape of her neck that flickers wildly. What was it about her that made me so meek? Was it her authoritative presence, or could it possibly be her beauty that sucked me in? Whatever it was, I wish it would fucking stop.
“It’s okay to be inquisitive, you know.” She announces while taking the tops of her teeth and gnawing at her bottom lip in a slow drag. I was becoming distracted by her movements, her sultry tone, and the way her gaze ate me alive. I knew she was trouble, but her strong energy was impossible to ignore. “Curiosity is a normal reaction. You want to experience what it feels like, how different it is from being with a man, and perhaps if it’s better.” She reaches for a strand of my hair and tilts her head appreciatively at me.
Fuck, why was she bringing this up again?
“I’m seeing someone, Annalise.” I growl.
Her once lust-filled expression turns sour. “Someone who doesn’t deserve you.”
“You don’t even know him.”
“I don’t have to know him, little mouse.” Taking the same strand of hair, she tucks it softly behind my ear before leaning in. “What do you say? We can settle that desire to know what it’s like once and for all?” She ghosts her cherry-scented lips over mine, which has my eyes fluttering. “What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.”
She was going to kiss me. Her lips danced gently over mine, but I couldn’t seem to move at all. I was frozen, too stunned that my brain's receptors completely malfunctioned and shut off.
“Is there any room for one more?” The sound of Priscilla’s voice immediately causes me to spur into action and repel away from Annalise on a gasp.
What the hell was I doing?
“Don’t stop on my account.” She grins, watching the two of us closely as Annalise glares hard into Priscilla. Completely mortified that I let myself fall under her spell, I quickly pick up the key from off the floor and start messing with the lock. “Aw, don’t be so shy, little mouse.” She teases, but I try to ignore her completely. “I happen to like the whole bashful thing you have going on. Makes me think of all the ways I can make your skin blush.”
A strong shiver shoots down my body towards my center, and I can’t help but glance over at them once again.
“Leave her alone.” Annalise angrily snarls as Priscilla wraps her arm around her shoulder and tugs her in close to her side. “I don’t think she likes us anymore.” She frowns as she snuggles further into Priscilla’s hold while resting her head on her chest.
“No?” Priscilla grins wickedly, peering down into Annalise’s eyes before turning her attention back to me. “And why’s that?”
“That's not true.” I shake my head at their theory, but honestly, I was skeptical of them all at the moment. With Priscilla watching me like she did yesterday after attacking Mr. Ben, my skin begins to quake and break out into a cluster of goosebumps that cover my legs and arms. Both girls had strong energies, but there was something about Priscilla that made my blood run cold.
“We showed you our spot, Charlotte.” Annalise speaks loudly in a tone that demands my attention. “We told you our deepest secrets. You confided in us, and we confided in you. You’re one of us whether you want to be or not. Rare blood flows through your veins, little mouse. Like us, you don’t bleed like normal humans do. You harbor depravity in your soul, and just like us, you want to embrace it fully.”
My eyes scour for any indication she may be trying to scare me or tease me, but all I see is the fire in both their eyes as she continues.
“Don’t run from us. Don’t fear us.” She orders. “We’re your tribe now.”
This was starting to get freakishly weird. So strange that my uneasiness climbed to the very top and began to free fall once Annalise was finished with her speech. Something wasn’t right with them. And for some reason, they wanted me in the middle of it.
My mouth opened and closed, but I couldn't find the words to say as fear consumed me. So, on a quick spin, I quickly unlock my bedroom door and run inside until both Priscilla and Annalise are blocked by my door. A rush of air spills out of my mouth as I finally feel as though I can breathe. My heart is still beating rapidly, but I feel more at ease knowing that I’m safe now.
What the hell was going on up there?
Please tell me Priscilla didn’t attack someone else…
Picking up my pace, I park my feet next to another student who’s standing just beside Principal Welch’s door, listening to whatever is going on in her office.
“What’s going on in there?” I ask, nodding my head towards her door as the shouting gets louder.
“Principal Welch was fired early this morning.” She explains, and my mouth physically drops to the floor. “Supposedly, there were some scandalous photos sent around of her naked and tied up or some shit.” She shakes her head like she’s grossed out. “A crap ton of students and other teachers received the pictures, so she’s in there now, arguing with the superintendent about keeping her job.”
Another person at St. Catherine’s fired within one day? What the hell was the coincidence of that happening right after Mr. Rossi was terminated? Perhaps, it wasn’t a coincidence. Maybe someone planned it all along.
Peering into the crowd of students surrounding her office, I search for three familiar faces, but I soon realize that none of them are here. Could they possibly have something to do with this? And if they did, why? I knew they weren’t fans of hers, but could they really be that devious to get her fired? A rational part of me thinks no, but I wasn’t a foolish girl.
I was starting to believe that anything was truly possible at St. Catherine’s.
