Corrupted, page 17
“My elbow is no-where near your face,” she snapped, “but someone’s foot keeps kicking me in the bum” Lucy was so frustrated that she was seriously considering just jumping out and ditching the plan altogether.
“Sorry, that’s my elbow,” retorted Max, “and I hate to disappoint, but that’s not my foot.” Remy then all of a sudden began to shush them.
“Do you hear that?” she asked, and Lucy listened, she heard nothing.
“What?” she whispered loudly “I hear nothing.”
“Exactly,” said Remy, “I don’t think the engine is running anymore?” Lucy listened carefully again, to discover that Remy was right, she could not hear an engine running or anything else for that matter. The uneasy feeling in her stomach was beginning to increase rapidly, as all they could do was stay hidden and wait to see what was going on.
All of a sudden, the trunk sprung open, and Lucy was suddenly blinded by a flashlight being shown into her face. “Here they are,” said a loud male voice, “I told you I’d seen them sneaking back this way.” Lucy suddenly felt herself being pulled quite forcefully from the trunk and it took her a moment to find her feet before she realised what was happening. She looked around in horror to see four-armed security guards, all looking at her with a serious expression on their face.
“You three are busted,” said one of the guards, as Remy and Max were also pulled from the trunk.
“How did you find us?” scowled Remy defiantly. Max for his part appeared absolutely terrified that they had been caught.
“You don’t think we have security cameras around the building too?” replied another security guard. Lucy crossed her arms and groaned, of course they had cameras around the outside, why hadn’t they factored that into their plan?
“Look,” said Max, as he held up his hands, “I don’t want trouble, I’ll come quietly.” Lucy and Remy looked at each other then rolled their eyes.
“All three of you will come quietly,” said one of the guards, “and you’ll each be speaking to the institute director in the morning.” This made them look at each other in horror; there had been nasty rumours about the director, mainly because nobody had ever seen them. One of the guards came and stood next to Lucy.
“Ok missy,” he snarled, “start walking!” Lucy scowled but started to walk around the building towards the main entrance. She had briefly considered running, but then noticed his gun and decided she’d rather not risk getting shot.
The woman working on the reception area desk, looked slightly alarmed when she saw three of the residents being escorted inside by the security team. The fire alarm could no longer be heard, and Lucy guessed that they must have turned it off after giving the all clear. She turned behind her to look at Remy and Max, but the guard who was escorting her said, “hey carry on walking.” Lucy scowled and waited for the receptionist to buzz them through the locked door back into the place she had long come to hate. Once inside the main building, Lucy was separated from Remy and Max as she was escorted to the part of the building where her bedroom was. She glanced at the face of the security guard who was escorting her, he was a burley looking man with a lot of facial stubble, and even though he kept a stern expression on his face Lucy got the feeling that he was kind. “Wouldn’t you want to escape from this hell hole if you could?” she asked beseechingly.
The security guard said nothing but pushed Lucy forward. She glared at him angrily, did he not realise that being caught was bad enough? She continued to walk down the corridor toward her room with the guard following closely, when suddenly she came to an abrupt halt and the security guard nearly walked straight into the back of her. Standing about 2 yards down the corridor in front of her stood Robertson, and the look on his face made Lucy’s heart drop through to her stomach; he was looking at her with a mixture of hurt and disappointment. Lucy said nothing but continued to stare at Robertson as if she wanted him to read her thoughts, she wanted a chance to explain herself, but then she felt the security guard push her roughly forward again. She quickly brushed off the strong surge of emotions she was feeling as she looked away from Robertson, she steeled herself as she realised that she had constantly disappointed people all her life, so why change the habit of a lifetime? Holding on to that dismal thought, she turned the corner and increased her pace back to her bedroom.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Why does it bother me?
Dear Diary
Our plan to escape carried out like a complete shit show!! Everything that could have gone wrong, did go wrong, and now I’m in more trouble than ever. The worst thing about the whole thing, was not losing what is most likely to be my final bid for freedom, but seeing the Doc’s face amongst all the chaos. He just looked so shocked and disappointed, but why does it bother me so much? I mean I’ve grown to kind of like him as my psychiatrist, but that doesn’t mean I need his permission or approval, does it? Especially after the way he has treated me lately. I just wish he would declare me fit for trial so I would have some real hope of getting out of here, but I don’t think he ever will. I know I shouldn’t annoy him or make him angry, but I can’t help it, he’s such an arsehole at times. I can’t ever tell him the truth though, I can’t ever tell anyone the truth, they’d declare me guilty, and I know I’m not.
Lucy
Chapter Twenty-six
It’s not like I’m Addicted
I laugh as I brush the wind-swept hair out of my face and turn to the person next to me. His name is Jake and we have only been dating for 2 months, but I have a really good feeling about him. Jake turns to me and smiles, then he pats the steering wheel of his new convertible car; he thinks he’s so cool. I must admit the car is nice with its red paint job and soft leather interior, but it’s not why I like Jake. I like him because he’s a free spirit, he doesn’t let anything get to him; the total opposite of me.
“Do you want to stop off for some lunch?” he asks, drawing me out of my thoughts. I nod at him, but then wonder where we will go, because we’re pretty much in the middle of nowhere. Then I see a sign for a service station a couple of miles ahead.
We decide to stop at Wendy’s for lunch because we just want something cheap and cheerful. I am sat at a small table waiting while Jake gets our food. I look around at the other people here and smile, I really appreciate days like this, as work has been stressful lately. Jake and I have had to try really hard to make time for each other, but he’s so sweet and always tries really hard to be caring, even though I can tell it doesn’t exactly come naturally. I look up, to see him walking towards me and I cannot help to admire how handsome he is with his dark blonde hair and brown eyes, he looks like he could have just walked off a film set. I sometimes can’t believe my luck that he’s, my boyfriend.
He puts the tray down on the table and I quickly begin to unwrap my chicken burger with bacon and maple syrup. Jake makes a face at me and I laugh slightly. Jake thinks that chicken burgers were invented by someone sinister; he thinks the only thing that should be on a burger bun is a patty. I wonder if Jake is going to sit down as I take a bite of my burger, but then he looks around cautiously before pulling out a small little bag from his pocket filled with small green leafy powder. “Be right back babe,” he says, “just going to sort my shit out.” I sigh as he walks towards the bathroom, I don’t really like him doing it, but I don’t bring it up to often, as it always leads to an argument between us. He says it helps him to relax while in a highly stressful career, and to be honest he doesn’t do it all the time, mainly on the weekends which I tell myself isn’t that bad.
“Hey honey,” says a voice and I am pulled from my thoughts. I look up to see a tall slightly overweight guy leaning over me and I inwardly cringe. I hope he is just going to ask me if I have a map or something. “You in here all by yourself?” he asks, and I shake my head quickly. I note that he is wearing a tracksuit with a baseball hat, not a good look on any man in my opinion, but I dare not tell him that.
“My boyfriend is just in the bathroom,” I tell him, pointedly. Then he looks at me and turns to some friends sat a table behind him.
“Looks like we got ourselves an English girl over here boys,” he says, I roll my eyes at him and go back to eating my chicken burger.
“Hey, here’s an idea. My names’ Phil by the way,” he continues, “why don’t you ditch your boyfriend and let me, and the boys here show you a nice time.” I shake my head at him, avoiding his eye contact.
“No thanks,” I say still trying to remain clam, but then he puts his hand on my shoulder and I tense up.
“Hey,” I hear Jake say loudly, and I am relieved that he is back because this whole situation is beginning to make me feel uncomfortable. Jake strolls over to Phil beside me and knocks his hand away from my shoulder. For a moment there is silence as Jake and Phil size each other up. “My girlfriend wants to be left alone dude,” warns Jake, holding his hands up and I am glad he is trying to defuse the situation; sometimes he can be a little hot headed.
“Maybe you shouldn’t leave your girlfriend unaccompanied in the middle of nowhere,” retorts Phil, “especially when you are going to snort god knows what in the bathroom.” Jake’s face suddenly changes expression, and I can practically see him turning red, as his hands bunch into fists.
“What did you say?” he asks angrily. Phil just smiles back at him and I can tell that he is pleased he’s finally got a rise out of Jake.
“You heard,” taunts Phil and then Jake launches himself at him. I quickly jump up and try to pull him away, but there are fists flying everywhere as Phil is responding to Jake’s charge just as eagerly, and I’m very sure I don’t want to get a black eye to take into work tomorrow. I look beseechingly at the staff over the Wendy’s counter, but they are all looking just as fearful of getting involved as I am. Eventually when I am beginning to lose hope, Jake throws a punch at Phil’s face and he falls to the floor. I think maybe he is unconscious, but I can’t see his face properly. Suddenly Jake starts kicking him while he’s lying on the floor. For a moment I can only stand there in disbelief as Jake continues to rain blow after blow on Phil with an angry expression on his face.
“JAKE!” I shout suddenly, “stop it, let’s go.” Jake turns to look at me and looks back to Phil. “Jake,” I repeat. Jake finally turns towards me and I glare at him hoping my face conveys what I cannot put into words. He groans then nods at me, and we begin to head towards the door. I look cautiously at Phil’s friends expecting them to stop us from leaving. However, they merely look at each other, unsure what to do now that their leader has fallen. I quickly increase my pace to the door and once we are outside, I turn on Jake. “Why did you have to do that?” I snap furiously and Jake looks at me blankly.
“Wait what?” replies Jake. I sigh; he doesn’t realise what the potential consequences of this could be.
“I get you were trying to protect me, but we could have just walked away,” I say, “instead you turned into a jerk.” Jake stops walking towards the car and looks towards me with an annoyed expression on his face.
“I was a jerk?” he repeats angrily. “What about that guy?” I stop just before the car and look back at him.
“That guy was a jerk too,” I say, “but you are a lawyer, what if he decides to press charges?” Jake looks anxious for a moment but then he grins at me.
“Chill babe,” he states, “I lost it a little, it happens, he won’t press charges.” I roll my eyes and try to remain calm as we both get into the car.
“You change when you take that stuff,” I note and then I regret it, this can only ever lead to another argument. I look at Jake, but to my surprise, find that he does not look angry with me. Instead, he leans over and kisses me then cups my face with his hand.
“Hey, I’m sorry, babe,” he whispers, “I was just pumped, and seeing that guy treat you that way, I lost it.” I cover his hand on my face with my own and smile at him.
“I know and I appreciate it, but maybe you should lay off the weed for a while.” Jake sighs and starts up the car.
“Come on babe, a lot of people do it,” he says imploringly, “it’s not like I’m addicted. You know I only do it at the weekend.” We pull out of the service station and get back on the road, we are on the way to visit Jake’s parents and I am really nervous about meeting them. I wonder if they know that he does weed. I wonder what they would think about it.
“You’re a lawyer,” I say wearily, “what if you get into trouble?” Jake puts a hand on my leg, touched that I care.
“Babe, weed is legal in most states now for personal use.”
I then shrug my shoulders and say, “oh.” I mean what else can I say? He seems to have it all figured out, but the whole thing still makes me nervous. “You should try some,” he suggests suddenly, “just so you can see it’s not that bad.” I am about to tell him that I don’t want to ever try it, because I’m trying to make sure my career is on track, and I don’t want anything to jeopardise it. Then suddenly out of nowhere I find myself thinking about what Michael would say, which is strange, I’ve not really thought of him in the three years since he died. “Why would you do that to yourself,” I hear in his voice and I scowl, why should I care what he thinks when he thought so little of me. I turn to Jake and smile at him sweetly.
“Maybe one day I will” He smiles as he starts the engine. “Nothing heavy though,” I add nervously wondering if I will ever actually be brave enough to try it.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Disappointed isn’t the Word
When she had finished speaking, Lucy looked at Robertson for any sign that he had listened to her tale of being in love with Jake and how she had finally found some happiness in life, but Robertson did not speak. “See?” she stated, “I wasn’t always miserable or fucked up like I am now, I was once happy.” Robertson still did not reply and although he was looking at her, Lucy felt that he could be looking right through her. “Come on Doc,” she pleaded, “I know you’re disappointed in me, but let’s at least talk about it.” Robertson blinked at her, then sighed and leaned back in his desk chair.
“I don’t think disappointment quite covers it to be honest,” he revealed seriously, “you actively tried to stage a breakout and if you hadn’t been caught, goodness knows what would have happened, you were making such progress too.” Lucy was silent for a few moments deep in thought about why Robertson might be so annoyed with her before all of a sudden, she grinned.
“You were worried about me,” she gasped. Robertson did a double take then sighed, as he nodded slowly.
“I was working late when the fire alarm went off,” he explained, “I was stood outside when Elaine came and found me. Explained you were missing. Shit, Lucy, what do you think I thought?” The expression on Robertson’s face as he looked towards Lucy was a mixture of anger and concern.
“I’m sorry,” offered Lucy, but Robertson raised his hand and brushed off her comment with a swipe of his hand.
“Then to find out that not only were you not burning to death in a fire,” Robertson continued “but you had been caught trying to make a break for it. I just…well I didn’t know what to think.” Lucy lowered her head and for the first time she realised that she felt guilty over what she had done. Not guilty from actually doing it, but guilty for making Robertson worry about her, although there was a slight happiness at knowing he actually cared too.
“I was frustrated,” she admitted, finally lifting her head, “I know you say I’m making progress, but I honestly feel like I’ll be stuck here the rest of my life and as much as I enjoy our sessions Doc, that’s not the life I want for myself.” Robertson narrowed his gaze and his expression softened, as he processed the truth behind her words.
“Do you think that’s the life I want for you?” he queried, “to just be stuck in here with no hope of getting out? Lucy, I’m trying my very best to ensure that doesn’t happen.” Lucy shrugged her shoulders, he sounded like he was being sincere, but she couldn’t allow herself to believe that he cared, that he genuinely thought there was hope.
“I don’t know,” she admitted honestly, “sometimes I think you care, that you actually want me to make progress, but other times it’s like you find me so interesting, like I’m some kind of zoo animal and you are enjoying studying me.” Robertson blinked and Lucy flushed slightly, it almost sounded ridiculous now that she had said it out loud. After all, why would he find anything about her interesting? It took Robertson a while to answer as he carefully considered how he should respond to such an accusation.
“That’s not it at all,” he muttered quietly. Lucy scoffed and stared at him with an accusing expression on her face.
“No? You’ve shared with me before you find me ‘complex’.” Robertson stood up and shoved his hand in his pockets; the turn in conversation was beginning to make him increasingly uncomfortable.
“Complex? Yes,” he stated, nervously, “I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t interested in your condition as a psychiatrist.” Lucy jumped up out of her chair and clenched her fists.
“I HAVE NO CONDITION!” she shouted, and Robertson threw his hands up in the air, becoming frustrated with the situation and indeed with Lucy.
“Lucy, there is a reason you are in here.” Lucy crossed her arms fiercely and fell back down into the chair.
“I WAS FRAMED!” she cried. Then she put a hand to her face, becoming exasperated.
“Lucy,” said Robertson imploringly, “if they thought they could prove you are guilty and of sound mind then you’d be in jail not in a psychiatric institute.” Robertson edged closer to Lucy, trying to convince her of the truth.
