One Good Reason, page 10
“I’m not, and I don’t believe you are.”
“Noah, please drop it. The experience was humiliating and painful enough I’d rather not rehash it.”
“Natalie, I want to make it up to you.”
“How?” I asked as I took another bite of chicken refusing to look at him.
“This Friday night I’d like to take you out to dinner, and I want you to wear that dress again.”
“The dress is ruined. He ripped it.”
Noah cringed as I spoke.
“That dress would only remind me of that night and him and besides we have Erin Friday night.” I reminded him.
“Pam will babysit for us.”
“How is taking me out to dinner making it up to me?” My anger still simmered and could be heard in my voice.
“It can’t, but I want to take you somewhere special to me, and I wanted you to wear that dress because I know how happy you were, you looked beautiful, and I ruined it for you.”
I scooped up some mashed potatoes, but before I ate them, I answered him. “Okay, I’ll let you take me out to dinner.”
“Good. We’ll leave here at five.”
“So early? Where’s this restaurant?”
“Colorado.”
“Colorado? Are we staying over?”
“Yes, you’ll need a change of clothes.”
“What about Erin?”
“She’ll be fine. We’ll take her out Saturday night when we come home.” He walked away then stopped. “Natalie, I just want you to know I sent my date home right after the party.”
“That’s none of my business.” I couldn’t look at him, so I stared at the string bean hanging off my fork.
“Well, I think at this point in our relationship it is your business, and I needed to tell you.” He moved then stopped again. “And Natalie, I also want you to know that you’re not alone in this world, not anymore.”
I placed my fork in my mouth, bit down on the string bean and began to chew. Though I wanted to break out in tears, I simply shook my head.
The week went by fast, and I hated to admit it but I looked forward to my date with Noah. I assumed Noah thought I was considering leaving him since I told him I couldn’t do this anymore. I decided not to say anything to him because I wanted him to think it was a definite possibility.
“Where is daddy taking you?”
“I’m not sure, exactly. He said Colorado but where in Colorado I don’t have a clue.”
Erin jumped up and down on the bed clapping her hands. “He’s taking you to the house.”
“What house?”
“Our house! You will love it there. I love it there, and Daddy does too.”
Noah owns a home in Colorado. I don’t recall him ever mentioning property there or even talking about Colorado before last Sunday. “Does he go there a lot?”
“All the time.” Erin jumped up one last time than landed on her butt with her legs swinging off the side of the bed.
“Erin, what do you mean all the time?” I found if fascinating how Noah confided in his daughter. She knew everything about his life, well most everything and I only found out bits and pieces when he shared them with me.
“When he’s not here, he’s there.”
This was such a curious bit of information. I always assumed that when Noah left the house, he was whoring around somewhere. But he was in Colorado. Doing what I wondered? Maybe, he brings women there, maybe, his Russian girlfriend. I decided to extract a little more information from my nine-year-old informant. “Erin, does Daddy tell you what he does when he’s in Colorado.”
“Sure, he works and relaxes. He hikes, skies, and he rides his bike. Daddy loves Colorado. He says it’s his private space that he only shares with me.” She jumped off my bed and wrapped her arms around my hips. “And now you.”
I finished getting ready and packed a small bag. As hurt as I felt a week ago, today, I had to admit I was excited to be spending a night somewhere other than this house with Noah.
Once outside my bedroom, Erin ran ahead of me calling for her father. Noah stood at the bottom of the stairs. The expression on his face said everything. It was as if he was seeing me for the first time. Noah had his personal shopper send a stunning red dress to me this morning. I liked the dress even better than the dress I wore for his dinner party. I felt beautiful, and happy that something seemed to shift inside him. Time would reveal what it was, but something definitely shifted.
Erin jumped into his arms, and he lifted her then brought her back down to the floor where he knelt down and spoke with her. “Erin, honey, I’m taking Natalie to Colorado, but we’ll be back early tomorrow night, and then the three of us will go out.”
“I know, Natalie told me. When you get back if you are too tired we can stay in and watch Frozen.” Erin suggested.
“Honey, whatever you want to do,” Noah said as he kissed his daughter.
Noah rested his hand on my lower back as he escorted me out of the house to the limo where he stepped aside for me to enter.
Once inside the limo, I remained quiet. I had so many questions to ask, but I’d let Noah show me what he wanted me to see with no preliminary discussion.
Once at the airport, we walked out onto the tarmac, and a man dressed in a uniform shirt with epaulets on the shoulders greeted us. There were three more men dressed in similar garb that moved around the plane. Noah settled me into my seat then stepped away as he oversaw the flight preliminaries.
When we were ready to take off Noah strapped me in then took the seat next to me and did the same. He rested his hand on my thigh as the plane lifted into the air. I leaned my head back and closed my eyes.
“Baby, we’re here.” He whispered near my ear.
I opened my eyes. “I fell asleep.”
“You did.” He caressed my cheek with his hand. “Are you ready?”
I shook my head and sat up straighter in my seat. Noah unclipped my seatbelt, and I sat forward on the seat and stretched before I stood. Noah stood next to me waiting for me with his hand stretched out. I slid my hand in his and stood.
I stepped forward thinking Noah would move with me, but instead, he shifted closer to me and kissed my mouth then moved his head away from me and pinned me with his stare.
“Natalie, you are beautiful.”
I flushed and grinned. “Thank you, Noah.”
“Thank you for agreeing to come here with me.”
Before I could respond, one of the crewmembers interrupted. “Sir, everything is all set.”
“Thank you, Stephen.” Noah took my hand in his and escorted me off his plane.
We rode through the streets of Boulder, Colorado in silence in the back of the limo. Noah and I held hands as they rested in the narrow space between our bodies. Warm lights lit up the quaint homes we passed. Charming arts and craft houses lined the streets with lush green lawns and vibrant blooms. Mature trees of all varieties towered over the streets nestling the homes together.
I smiled at Noah. I felt a change, and though I had that constant fear that this Noah might be gone tomorrow, tonight I would enjoy every second of it. He invited me into his sanctuary, and I relished the compliment.
The houses became more spaced apart and the view of the mountains more visible as we seemed to leave the more heavily populated part of Boulder behind us. We traveled up and curved around bends as I stared out the window. The rich colors of the setting sun consumed the skyline with shades of blue, purple, orange, pink, and red. The view overwhelmed me, and I suddenly needed to cry. A tear dropped from the corner of my eye, and I quickly wiped it away.
Noah must have noticed because he squeezed my hand but said nothing. One word from him and a downpour of tears would have overtaken me.
The limo pulled into a long drive that ended with a magnificent red cedar log and stone home. Redwood and stone columns adorned the front exterior of the home and an abundance of windows throughout similar to Noah’s other home.
I looked at him. “This is your home?”
He shook his head. I took another look out the window then whirled around. “Noah, it’s magnificent.”
A perfectly situated home nestled in the hills of Colorado with a panorama view of the mountains and the valleys. I imagined Noah escaping to this home for peace and solitude. To get away from his demons and sometimes though I hated to admit it I knew he used it to get away from me.
“I come here to think, to clear my head.” He offered as if he read my mind. “My life feels chaotic, somewhat disappointing but when I’m here, I regain some semblance of normalcy.”
I wanted to tell him that his life didn’t have ever to feel that way if he’d only stop his strange extracurricular activities but I decided it was a conversation for another time. Instead, I leaned in and placed a soft kiss on his cheek and thanked him. He reciprocated by placing his mouth over mine kissing me.
The limo parked in front of the entrance to the home. Next to the front door stood a large pile of firewood. A small chipmunk ran out then back into the safety of the woodpile. The driver stepped out, walked around to the back, and removed my bag from the trunk and placed it near the double glass front doors. He returned to the car and opened my door. I stepped out and looked around as Noah came up beside me.
Noah gave me a quick lesson in the trees that surrounded his property. The majority of trees were Blue Spruce and Quaking Aspen and beyond his property were a wide variety of indigenous trees of Colorado. His favorite were the Quaking Aspen, he had more planted on his property upon the completion of the house. Everything else was a gift of nature that remained untouched through the construction.
I followed him in and stood in the foyer. My eyes didn’t know where to look first. The vaulted ceilings and the open floor plan with floor to ceiling windows immediately drew my attention to the back of the house where I stared at the entire view of the mountains. “Noah, I don’t know where to begin. It’s breathtaking.”
I pried my eyes away from the spectacular view and took in the surrounding space. The first thing I noticed, which made my heart melt, were the numerous pictures of Noah and Erin. Everywhere I looked I saw framed pictures of them together smiling, laughing, hugging each other. This home was his real home. I could feel him here. I could feel his heart here.
Then I asked the first thing that came to my mind. “Why don’t you live here year round?”
“I want to, but that’s the one thing I can’t buy. I tried to bribe Erin’s mother to move to this area, but she won’t leave her drug addict boyfriend.”
“You stay in California for Erin?”
Noah shook his head, took my hand and walked me around the house. As I looked around, I realized this was where he wanted to be and needed to be. I felt an overwhelming need to hug him. I wrapped my arms around Noah, and I realized he and I never hugged. We’ve been intimate, we touched and kissed but we never simply hugged. It felt loving, and I didn’t want to let go and I suspected Noah felt the same.
We stayed like that until there was a knock on the door. “Are you expecting company?”
“Yes, the chef.”
“We’re having dinner here?”
“Is that okay?”
“Yes, I want to stay here. I don’t want ever to leave.”
Noah touched my cheek then went to answer the door. A sweet portly man stood on the threshold looking at me. “Andrew, this is Natalie.”
“Nice to meet you. I’ve seen you on television. You’re famous!” I went to shake his hand. He blushed then greeted me back. Andrew was a high profile chef, so I was surprised when I made him blush.
While Andrew set up and cooked, Noah took me to his bedroom. “I’d like you to sleep in here with me tonight but if you don’t feel comfortable, there are other bedrooms.”
I looked around the room. I could tell Noah must have just been here. The room smelled like him. I breathed in the subtle smells of leather, bergamot, and spice. I thought back to the last time he left the house for a day or two and imagined him coming here while I stayed at home missing him. “This is where you come to get away from the house, from your life, from me.”
“I told you this place gives me a sense of normalcy. Please don’t take it personally.”
“It’s too late for that. I don’t know what you’ve done to me but when you leave, I miss you something fierce. It feels like you rip something from me when you leave.”
Noah picked up my bag and exited through his bedroom door.
“Where are you taking that?” I asked.
“I’ll set you up in your bedroom.” He responded.
“Leave it,” I demanded. “I just told you how much I miss you when you leave. Do you think I want to sleep apart from you?”
He walked back into his room and placed my bag on the bench at the end of his bed. “Natalie, I don’t mean to hurt you. I know sometimes it feels like I do it intentionally but you are important to me. I’m not a good man but I would do anything for you and I’d never let anyone hurt you.”
“Except you. You let you hurt me.” I tried not to sound cruel but the statement alone was cruel but needed to be said. “Because I care so much about you the moments when you do hurt me feel that much worse.”
“Natalie, I’m a man of very few words. The things I do are bad. Sometimes I fuck up but I want to be better.”
“I think you are already.” Listening to Noah express how he wants to be better was better than him promising to be better. I knew that him wanting it would be a stronger catalyst to bring about change.
“Thank you, my love. And I’m happy you came with me tonight. I’ve wanted to share this place with you since our first week together.” Noah took my hand and guided me into the adjacent room.
After the tour of his bedroom and bathroom, he guided me through the rest of the house. It felt like a ski chalet where every room had a balcony looking out over the vistas, the Boulder Flatirons, and Mount Evans.
As beautiful as the house was it made me sad because I could feel how at home Noah felt here but once again he couldn’t have what he wanted. Though he was powerful and a billionaire there was so much out of his control though he tried to convince himself otherwise. He could only control so much but the one thing he wasn’t doing was living his life the way he wanted to. I hoped for him, for Erin, and for myself that one day he’d be able to.
Dinner was delicious, a simple meal using fresh ingredients done to perfection. In started with a fresh salad perfectly dressed followed by the main meal. The cut of meat went down like butter, along with the herb roasted potatoes, and the tender asparagus and for dessert, a whipped custard covered with fresh berries.
During the dinner, we talked about the home and how excited he was during the construction. He’d bring Erin to the site when he had her for the week and they’d camp out on the site. He’d build a campfire and roast marshmallows. Erin loved it. Pam told Noah that when Erin got back, it was all she’d talked about.
I finished my last bite of dessert and sat back in my seat. I circled my belly with my hand. “That was delicious. Thank you for all of this.”
“It’s a small attempt to make up for my abhorrent behavior towards you.”
“The meal?”
“No. Bringing you here.” He paused. “Letting you into this part of my life.” He leaned closer to me. “Natalie, why have you stayed?”
“Because I’m in love with you.” I watched Noah’s eye twitch as I expressed my deepest feelings. I never expected Noah to reciprocate the feeling, but I had to be honest with myself and with him.
We said nothing to each other after my last statement but stared into each other’s eyes. Then I whispered, “Noah, I need you.”
Noah leered at me. His jaw ticked as he slowly pushed his plate away from him. With his gaze fixed on me, he spoke to the caterer. “Andrew, can you leave us please?”
“Yes, sir.” It took less than a minute, and Andrew left the house.
Noah stood and pushed my plate away. He scooped me up, and lifted my behind onto the table. I rested my palms on the table bracing myself for his invasion. He brought his strong hands to either side of my neck, moved his hand behind my head, ran his fingers through my hair then pulled on it hitching my face up, so my lips became available to him. With his thumb, he stroked across my bottom lip dragging it slightly open while his eyes hungrily fixated on them then covered my lips with his. I reached around and raked my fingers through his hair, pulling him closer, fixating my mouth firmly to his as our tongues swirled around touching and filling each other’s mouth.
My intense need for this man hurt every part of me. He moved his hand between my legs. The heat between my thighs burned for him. My greedy little pussy pulsated waiting for Noah to fill me. His hand moved up my back then back down dragging the zipper with it. He moved his other hand searching my dress for the hem. When he found it, he dragged it up and off my body and tossed it on the deck. He found the snaps between my legs that enclosed my bodysuit and ripped them apart. He plunged his fingers inside of me. Wet and throbbing for more I begged him. “Noah, please.” I whimpered as I ripped at the button on his pants.
He slipped his fingers out of me and tore his pants off without unzipping them. He reached inside his boxer briefs, grabbed his cock and pulled it out. With his thighs, he pushed my legs further apart, brought his hands under me cradling my ass bringing my pussy closer to him then he thrust his rock hard erection inside of me.
He moaned a carnal roar as he entered me. He shoved his cock deeper and pushed without moving. He stayed, wickedly enjoying the depth of his cock while the pillowy warmth of my insides surrounded it.
Then the assault began. He pushed deeper and harder and faster. He and I involuntarily spoke licentious words to each other: fuck me harder, deeper, slap me, and grab me.
I needed every opening filled with him. I wanted his tongue all over my body and to bite me when he finished. I wanted to feel pain and pleasure. I wanted him to leave his mark on me forever.
“Noah, I’m yours, any way you need me, I’m yours.” I breathed out.
“All mine, no one else can have you. Mine.” He ground out. “Your pussy is mine, and your tits are mine and your lips. Your body is all mine. You're all mine.” He plowed deeper into me as I came around him. I lost all control. Convulsing while grabbing for him, holding on to him as my body betrayed me. My body took over and dictated its release.
