Five Hundred Miles From Friona, page 30
“Yep,” she answers, grinning. “Go!”
I high-tail it out of there and go back to my room to find Rob propped up in his bed eating dry cereal out of the box. “Roses work out for ya?” He manages to smirk with his mouth full of Honey Nut Cheerios.
“Thanks for making me do it, man. I owe you big time.”
“Are you and Leanne back together?”
“Yeah.” I check my phone. “And I’m going back in twenty minutes. We’re going out for breakfast.”
I grab clean clothes out of my closet and head for the shower. I’m ready in less than ten minutes. Not having hair speeds up the process. When I come out of the bathroom, Rob is still in bed, but now he’s got an open book on his lap and the cereal box is on the floor next to his bed.
“How do you know so much about girls?” I ask while I put my stuff in my pockets and put on my cap.
“I have four older sisters who made sure their little brother was properly schooled in all things girl.” He laughs.
I sit on my bed to wait until it’s time to go back to Leanne’s room. “I didn’t know you had four older sisters.”
“Yeah, my parents kept having kids until they finally got a boy, me. And I have some big shoes to fill. All of my sisters graduated from A&M.” He starts to tick off items on his fingers. “Starting with the oldest: oncologist, obstetrician, pediatrician, and lawyer. I’ll be a general surgeon specializing in pediatrics. They’re all married to doctors, too, except the lawyer; she’s married to a federal judge. We don’t talk about them much,” he says grinning. “They’re the black sheep.”
Damn, a whole family of brainiacs. I wonder what it’s like to sit around their dinner table at Thanksgiving. “What do your parents do?”
“Retired. My dad was chief of surgery for one of the big hospital systems in Houston. My mom has a PhD in early childhood development. She home schooled all of us through sixth grade then she taught at Rice University for a few years. Now they travel all the time and play a lot of golf.”
“What does Annalisa want to specialize in?” Hell, I’m too far into this conversation not to find out about her too.
“Cosmetic surgery. She’s known that’s what she wanted to do since she was about ten. She was in a car wreck when she was six and ended up with burns over eighty-five percent of her body. I think she’s had something like twenty-two or twenty-three surgeries.” He stares at his book for a few seconds. “She’s the bravest person I’ve ever known, but she would hate it if anybody felt sorry for her.” Shit, he looks like he’s about cry just from talking about her.
“What about her parents?”
“Her mom stays at home and also does volunteer work at Shriners in Galveston. That’s the children’s hospital that Annalisa has been in and out of for the last twelve years and where I’m hoping to practice someday. Anyway, she hasn’t seen her dad since she was seven. He walked out on them not too long after the accident. He’s a refinery worker and lives in Texas City.”
That girl’s had a tough life. Now I know why Rob looked like he was about to cry. “How do they make a living if her mom doesn’t work and her dad’s not around?”
He closes his book, shoves it off his lap and sits straight up. “She doesn’t want people to know about it because it embarrasses her, but she was awarded millions in a personal injury lawsuit after the accident. Still doesn’t make up for what she’s been through though.”
I’ve never even met this girl, but all of a sudden I want to beat the shit out of her dad for abandoning her and her mother when they needed him. Only a sick bastard would walk out on his family. “Man, if you ever want to beat the shit out of her asshole dad, I’ll be glad to help you.”
Rob grits his teeth. “There’ve been so many times I’ve wanted to hunt his sorry ass down just so I could show him what he’s missed. I might do it someday.”
My phone buzzes with a text message from Leanne: Where are you?
I’m fifteen minutes late, but I send a reply anyway: Sorry. On my way.
I turn back Rob, who’s finally dragging his butt out of bed. “I’m in trouble.”
“You better get down there,” he says. “You don’t need to screw it up now.”
“No shit. See ya later.”
Chapter Forty-nine
Leanne
Brandon and I have been back together for six incredibly perfect days! It’s sort of like we just started dating for the first time but without all the getting to know each other weirdness. Although now, on top of worrying about all the other things I usually worry about, I catch myself obsessing over when he’s going to have an episode. So far, I haven’t seen any signs of the disorder, but I’m afraid it’s going to raise its ugly head because of stress over finals which start tomorrow.
We did a lot of research on intermittent explosive disorder last weekend. Stress, being tired, and a zillion other things can trigger an episode. Just reading about the disorder and the violence that is sometimes associated with it scared me to death. I tried not to let Brandon see my shock, but he saw it anyway. He made me promise to run away as fast as I could if I was ever around when it happened. I promised but with my fingers crossed in my mind. I don’t know how I’ll react when it happens, but I’m not sure I’ll be able to leave him alone if he has the potential to hurt himself. I just pray that he can control it enough so that he doesn’t get to the point of damaging things and himself when it happens.
We also came up with a healthy eating plan for both of us. It’s not a diet exactly, but we’re trying to cut out some sugar and carbs and eat lean meats with lots of fresh fruit and vegetables. Even though that kind of food is hard to find around campus, we’re trying to make it work for us. We’ve also worked out together at the rec center a few times this week, and I finally got to meet Brandon’s friend, Adam, whom I instantly liked. Brandon hasn’t said whether they’ve talked about being roommates next year, but I hope they will be.
Cassie and I found a great two-bedroom, two-bathroom apartment not too far from campus. We signed the lease and paid our deposit this week. We’re moving in over Memorial Day weekend, and both of us are so excited we can hardly wait. She took off for Devin’s house a few minutes ago, claiming they will be studying until late tonight. Yeah, right, but I’m happy for her; they seem to be perfect for each other. I’m so glad Dean didn’t want to pursue a relationship with her. Actually, he never brought her up again. Thank goodness.
Today is the day I go with Brandon to meet with Dr. Pressley. I don’t know what to expect because I’ve never even met a psychiatrist before. Now I’m alone in my room, pacing back and forth, probably wearing a hole in the rug between the beds because of my nervousness. To say I’m freaking out is an understatement. I think I’m going to throw up.
When I hear a knock on the door, my stomach flips over. Wiping my clammy hands on my jeans, I take a deep breath and open the door. Brandon bends down and brushes a light kiss across my lips then he smiles a perfect Brandon Kirk smile. That’s when I realize that I would walk through fire for him. Maybe today’s going to be a piece of cake after all.
“You ready, babe?” he asks, and I nod. I don’t want him to know how nervous I am.
I leave him at the door while I bundle up in my coat and scarf. A cold, wintry drizzle has been coming down all day, and I’ve been chilled to the bone since I got up. Being outside doesn’t sound very appealing, but this is for Brandon. I won’t let him down.
Dr. Pressley’s office isn’t very far from our dorm, and Brandon usually walks to his appointments, but I’m driving today because of the weather. When we arrive a few minutes later, she greets us at the door with a friendly smile.
She is probably in her mid-forties and looks stylish in her gray sweater dress, colorful scarf and tall black boots. When she introduces herself to me, the first thing I notice is her soft voice which puts me at ease. She pats Brandon on the back. It’s a motherly gesture, the same one I’ve seen Karen use with Brandon before. I automatically assume that Dr. Pressley has kids of her own.
The walls in her office are painted a cream color, and three diplomas hang behind her small, uncluttered desk. Framed botanical prints hang on the other walls, and she has a few potted plants scattered around the room. The sofa and three chairs are upholstered in soft blues and greens. There’s also an end table with nothing on it except a blue ceramic lamp and a box of tissues. It’s like I just stepped into her living room. This is definitely a place where I would feel comfortable talking about anything.
The hour passes quickly with her asking Brandon a lot of questions and explaining the cognitive behavior therapy process to me. She is helping Brandon learn to recognize when an episode is coming on and teaching him relaxation techniques and coping skills to use to control his actions when he starts getting angry. He tells her that we’re working on eating healthier and exercising more. She seems pleased, saying that’s one of the recommended therapies and makes a note on her pad. The session ends with her telling Brandon to call if he needs her at any time over the Christmas break. I’m surprised when she gives me one of her cards and tells me that I can also call her any time.
When we get in the car, Brandon looks over at me and says, “What’d you think?”
“I liked her…” I let my voice trail off and turn the heater up full-blast.
“But?” He’s frowning at me.
“There’s no but, Brandon. I just didn’t know you’d been keeping a journal, and I didn’t know about some of the other stuff you’ve been doing.”
“I’ve been writing in the journal since Dr. Neely diagnosed me in the hospital, and I’m doing everything else they’ve told me to do. It’s just been hard to fit it all in this week because I’ve been studying for finals.” He sighs and adds, “I know I haven’t gotten enough sleep.”
“I haven’t slept enough, either, but I’m proud of you for taking it so seriously. I think it’s helping you.”
He pulls me toward him and kisses my forehead. “You’re helping me; you’re the prize.”
I remember him saying that Dr. Neely told him to keep his eye on the prize. “You’re the better prize,” I tell him. “Do you want to go back to the dorm and take a power nap before we start studying?”
His eyebrows shoot up, and I smack his arm. “No messing around today. We’ll sleep for an hour then we have to study.”
“You’re a mean little girl,” he teases.
“Yeah, but we’ll have four days together next weekend in Arlington.” I pat his cheek. “So keep your eye on that prize.”
“Okay,” he sighs disappointedly, like I just denied him oxygen or water or something else vital.
Holding his face between my hands, I give him a sweet little kiss. “I’ll never not love you.”
“I’ll never not love you.” He gives me a kiss that causes my blood to heat and my heart to throb. I’m about a half second away from attacking him.
I shove away from him, practically gasping. “Bribing my hormones with a kiss like that is not fair, cowboy!”
“What?” A smirk that he tries to hide consumes his face. “You kissed me first.”
“I know, but now I’m all… sweaty,” I whimper, sounding like a two-year-old. Sometimes I’m completely pathetic.
He throws his head back and laughs as I back out of the parking place and head toward the dorm. When I park my car, he reaches for me and kisses me again. I’m a goner, lost to his scent and oh so kissable mouth.
I basically drag him across the parking lot and into the elevator. Once the door closes, he backs me up against the wall, presses against me, and kisses me again. I could swear there’s steam swirling above our heads. All bets, as well as certain items of clothing, are off as soon as we get to my room.
I’m only eighteen, but I’m pretty sharp, and I’m absolutely convinced that the only way to get through finals week is by eating healthy, studying hard, and having sex, although, not necessarily in that order. I’m just glad to have a boyfriend who loves me as much as I love him. Brandon and I make it through our tests, and we both think we did well. The past seven days were so great, thanks to my foolproof “get through finals” plan. I can hardly wait until May finals week.
Now we’re on our way to Arlington for the weekend and then we’ll head home for the Christmas holidays. Brandon isn’t too happy about me being gone for two of our four weeks off while I’m on my trip, so I promised to go somewhere with him on spring break. I also promised to call him every day while I’m on the cruise. I’m still excited about going on vacation with my parents, but it would be so much better if Brandon could go with us.
I already know I’ll miss him like crazy.
Chapter Fifty
Brandon
Leanne is in the bathroom with the door shut, but I can hear her laughing and talking on the phone. It’s Dean. They talk and text each other almost every day, sometimes several times a day. We’ve been in Arlington for two days and I bet she’s talked to him six times so far. I know they’re good friends, but I can’t stand her talking to him while she’s with me. Honestly, I can’t stand her talking to any of those guys. I don’t know any of them, but knowing them probably wouldn’t make me any less protective of her. “Leanne is mine,” I say out loud. Suddenly the anger hits me hard, surprising me, like a sucker punch in the face.
Breathe. I’m flat on my back on the bed with my arms at my sides. My eyes are closed and I’m trying to relax every muscle in my body, starting with my feet and working up to my ankles, calves, thighs, and so on. I’m taking deep breaths in through my nose…one…two…three…four…five… and out through my mouth… one…two…three…four…five. I keep doing it over and over, just like Dr. Pressley told me.
It’s taken awhile, but I think I’ve just made it through my first episode without losing my shit. Thank you, God and Dr. Pressley.
Feeling drained, I’m lying perfectly still on the bed several minutes later when Leanne comes out of the bathroom and sits beside me. She’s wearing a pink bra and panties and her hair is wrapped in a towel. “You can have the bathroom now. I’ll dry my hair in here.”
Grabbing her around the waist, I wrestle her onto the bed with me. I hold her hands over her head, straddle her, and then I start kissing her. “Brandon!” she squeals, laughing and squirming to get away. “Stop!”
“You can’t come in here wearing that and not expect me to react.” I kiss a trail down her neck and throat and chest. “And you like it.”
When I let go of her hands, she grasps my shoulders and kisses me. “Mmm, I do like it. I could stay here with you all day,” she breathes. “But we have to meet Rachel and Jake for breakfast.”
“I know, but I need to tell you something first.”
“What?”
“While you were getting ready, I had an attack, an episode.” I see panic in her eyes and her entire body tenses. I hate that I do that to her. “I tried to relax and breathe like Dr. Pressley told me and I got through it.”
She slides her arms around my neck and gives me another kiss. “You did good. I’m proud of you.” Then when she looks up at me, her forehead creases into a frown. “What do you think triggered it?”
I don’t know how to tell her without sounding like a prick, so I just say it, “You were talking to Dean.” Then the chickenshit shows up, so I add, “Maybe I’m hungry; hell if I know.”
“I won’t talk to Dean anymore when I’m with you. I’m sorry. I didn’t realize that bothered you.”
“Well, it does.” I get up and head to the bathroom.
“Brandon?”
Instead of answering, I stop and turn around.
“Don’t you need to write that down in your journal?”
“I will when I get out of the shower.”
She comes over and hugs me. “I love you, cowboy.”
“I love you.”
“Are you okay now?” she asks.
“I think so.” I hope I am.
I go in the bathroom and get in the shower, letting the hot water pound my back while I think about the episode. I didn’t lie to Leanne when I said I thought I was okay, but it wasn’t exactly the truth, either. The truth is: I’m scared it’s going to happen again. It hits me so fast, and what if it happens today in a crowd of people at the football game? I would embarrass Leanne, myself, and our friends, or hurt somebody. I stand in the spray until I’m finally able to shake the depressing thoughts out of my head and replace them with thoughts of getting to spend one more night with Leanne before we head home.
By the time we’re ready to go meet Jake and Rachel for breakfast, I feel a lot better. Leanne, on the other hand, is a nervous wreck. She’s running around the room, putting things away and making the bed. Who makes their own bed in a hotel? She’s freaking out, and she’s ignoring me. When there’s nothing left for her to do, she unplugs her phone from the charger and picks up her purse.
Before we leave the room, I lift up her chin and give her a kiss. “I’m fine now, so stop worrying.”
“But it was my fault, Brandon. I didn’t know.” Her chin trembles like she’s about to cry. “I feel terrible.”
I give her tight hug. “It just happens, babe; it’s nobody’s fault.”
My stomach growls and she pulls away. “Let’s get you some food,” she says, but she doesn’t sound happy and she doesn’t say anything on the way downstairs.
Luckily the hotel has decent food on the buffet. So, like I’ve done for the last two mornings, I pile scrambled eggs, bacon and toast on one plate, fruit and yogurt on another. Leanne does the same, but takes only about half as much. We sit down with Jake and Rachel who have already finished eating but are still drinking coffee.
“Y’all ready for some football?” Jake asks. I notice that he’s wearing a Cowboys t-shirt and cap.
