Chasing a Brighter Blue, page 20
Stephanie raised an eyebrow. “Just how involved were you two?”
Shelby kept her expression even. “Not involved. I told you, we became friends.”
“And?”
“And what?”
Stephanie threw up her hands. “God, you’re so difficult,” she said. “Why must it be a big secret?”
Shelby stared at her. Yes, why was she keeping it a secret? She sighed. “Okay, so maybe we…we bonded a little,” she said evasively.
“Bonded?”
She rolled her eyes. “Okay…so we slept together. Is that what you want to hear?”
Stephanie laughed. “Was that so hard to say? And I already knew that.”
“How did you know?”
“Josh and his mother both went to her room very early on two occasions and she was not there.”
“That hardly implies that she was in my room.”
“Plus you were both acting strange.”
Shelby waved a hand in the air. “Doesn’t matter anyway. I’ve not heard from her.”
“So again…why haven’t you called her?”
“I told you, I was trying to give her some space.” She ran her fingers through her hair. “Honestly, Steph, after the wedding, I invited her here. I told her she could stay with me for a while until she figured out what she was going to do.”
Stephanie pointed her finger at her. “I knew you liked her.”
“We’re not in high school, you know. I was just giving her an option because she didn’t know what she was going to do,” she said, knowing it was a lie. Truth was, she knew she would miss Reagan and had hoped to spend more time with her. She met Stephanie’s gaze. “She turned me down.”
The smile left Stephanie’s face. “I’m sorry. But maybe she really did need to get away. I mean, her mother said she was shouldering some of the blame for her friend’s death.”
Shelby nodded. “She was.”
“So call her. See if she’s okay.”
“It’s too late. Too many weeks have passed,” she said. “It would be weird to call now. And if she wanted to keep in touch with me, she would have called.” That was the truth and she knew it. Which meant that Reagan didn’t want to keep in touch. They’d had a brief affair, that’s all. That was evident by Reagan’s silence. Of course, couldn’t the same be said of her? She’d not reached out to Reagan. Was Reagan thinking the same thing of her?
“You’re being stubborn. You never let anyone get close to you, Shelby. I think Reagan would be good for you. And I think you’d be good for Reagan.”
She stared at her. “What is it that you’re expecting from this?”
Stephanie’s expression turned serious. “I’d hoped that you’d fallen in love.”
“In love? Stephanie, I knew her for all of twelve days. And I’ll remind you again, you told me she wasn’t my type.”
“And you told me that I had no idea what your type was.” She leaned closer. “Shelby, I saw the two of you together. When you looked at each other, there was something there.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” she scoffed. “We became friends, we enjoyed each other’s company, that’s it.” When Stephanie would have commented, she held her hand up. “Enough about Reagan. Don’t you have contractors to line up for this remodeling of my suite?”
Stephanie stood up with a sigh. “Yes, I do.” She paused. “If you need to talk…”
Shelby smiled quickly. “I think we just did.”
Chapter Forty
Reagan had to admit that it was beautiful…and she also had to admit that she knew nothing about shooting a waterfall. Oh, she had some shots. Thirty or forty, maybe fifty. All amateurish at best.
Perhaps Gillian had been right. After ten years of people being her subjects, moving to nature and landscape photography would not be seamless. She was also twelve years removed from the last photography class she’d taken.
She moved away from the tripod and glanced up into the sky. The sun was trying to peek through the clouds even though the forecast had promised an overcast day with misty rain. Photography class or not, she knew water and bright light did not mix well. It was a chilly Wednesday morning in early March and she had the waterfall all to herself, even though it was an easy drive from Portland.
Gillian had hooked her up with an assignment—a calendar featuring the waterfalls of the Colombia River Gorge in Oregon. Gillian had also given her some pointers for aperture settings and shutter speeds. It seemed simple enough at the time. But once she’d gotten out here—and had been overwhelmed by the lush greenness of it all—she realized just how far out of her element she was. She was used to capturing people’s faces, their expressions. She was used to capturing the rubble of collapsed buildings as people sifted through it, looking for possessions…or worse, loved ones. She was used to the ugliness of war…and all that it entailed.
Not this. Not this nearly pristine scene of deep green swallowing up a raging waterfall. She stepped away from her camera, taking in the sights around her. Wet moss clung to rocks and water seemed to be seeping out from everywhere. There were so many different shades of green it nearly made her dizzy. But her eyes were drawn to the waterfall—Horsetail Falls—where the water plunged a hundred and seventy-five feet. Her plan had been to shoot here, then take the trail up—and behind—the upper falls. The trail to this point had been steep in places and very wet. She imagined it only got worse the higher up it went.
Sunlight flittered through the trees, and she looked up, finding a patch of deep blue as the clouds parted. She stared at the sky, unable to pull away, even after the clouds closed up again, hiding it.
An involuntary smile lit her face. It was the color of Shelby’s eyes. She would forever associate the deep blue sky with Shelby, she realized. As she’d told her that last night…she’d been in a dark place. Shelby had brought her out into the light, had chased away some of her demons—at least for a little while.
And she missed her.
She wished she’d called her back in December when she’d first gotten to San Diego. But she kept putting it off, telling herself that Shelby had probably already forgotten about her. She was back in Denver, back in her life. And anyway, as she’d told her mother, Shelby was out of her league. Oh, they’d had fun. And sure, Shelby had invited her to Denver. But she had a nagging feeling that the offer was only made in passing.
Her eyes moved back to the waterfall, following the endless flow absently, her thoughts still on Shelby. She would call her after all, she decided. If nothing else, just to let her know that she’d picked up her camera again. She hadn’t looked at any of her last shots, taking her therapist’s advice. Gillian had offered to go through them, but Reagan had said no. She simply downloaded them to a file and stored it away. Maybe someday she’d take a look at them. Not now. Not anytime soon. But she thought Shelby would want to know that, at least.
She took a deep breath, then let out a long sigh. She suddenly felt very lonely. She didn’t know a soul in Oregon. She didn’t know what the hell she was trying to do by shooting waterfalls either. She reached for her camera and quickly removed it from the tripod. That, at least, felt natural. She was folding up the tripod when she heard a sound behind her. She turned, smiling as two squirrels scuffled under a tree not far from her. Instinct brought her camera up and she was shooting away without thinking.
This…this was normal. Capturing movement, capturing expressions. Not of people, no. She laughed as the squirrels scurried away. Not people, no. Squirrels, of all things.
The clouds parted again and again she caught a glimpse of blue. Words Shelby had said to her once popped into her mind.
“If I were a photographer, wildlife would be my subject.”
She glanced to where the squirrels had been, then back to the waterfall. It was beautiful. It was powerful. But it wasn’t calling to her. She knew right then and there that taking this assignment had been a mistake.
“So maybe I’ll chase after some wildlife,” she murmured with a half smile.
Chapter Forty-One
“So…you like it?”
Shelby stared at what once was her modest suite. Even though Stephanie had kept her updated on the progress and had shown her pictures of the remodel, she still wasn’t prepared for the change. The full-size kitchen had everything she wanted.
“Well?” Stephanie asked again.
Shelby turned to her. “It’s…huge.” She smiled. “But I love it. You did a great job.”
Stephanie’s face lit up. “Thanks.” She grabbed her hand. “Let me show you the bedroom. Oh, but first, your office. You’re going to love it.”
Shelby stopped in the doorway of her new office. The back wall was all windows, facing west. The view of the mountains was breathtaking. She glanced over at Stephanie. “How do you expect me to get any work done?”
“I take it you like the view?”
She walked fully into the room, pausing to run her hand across the smooth surface of the desk before moving closer to the windows. Snow still clung to the upper peaks, but the mountains were splashed with sunshine this time of day. The aspens had budded out, their yellowish-green a nice contrast with the darker colors of the spruce, fir and pine trees on the mountainside. Spring was right outside her windows, making her anxious to get out there.
She turned around. “When will it be ready?”
“We can move the rest of your furniture this week,” she said. “There are just a few odds and ends to do. Ceiling fan in the bedroom, for instance.” She motioned down the hall. “Come take a look.”
The bedroom was much larger than her old one, and it, too, faced west. She walked inside, trying to picture where the bed would go.
“It’s bigger than you wanted, I know,” Stephanie said. “But if we made the bathroom any bigger, it would be obscene, especially with the Jacuzzi tub—which is fabulous, by the way.”
She walked toward the master bathroom. “What about a larger closet?”
Stephanie looked at her skeptically. “It’s already huge. And I’ve seen your wardrobe. You won’t fill half of it.”
That much was true, she admitted. And without having a corporate office to go into every day, she doubted her business suits would get much wear. As she went into the bathroom, her eyes widened.
“Oh, my God! It is obscene,” she said.
Stephanie brushed past her. “TV in the mirror. I love that part.” She turned a circle, motioning in both directions. “Kind of a hers and hers design,” she said. “Two toilets, two separate vanities.”
Shelby raised her eyebrows. “Was that really necessary?”
“Just planning for the future,” Stephanie said with a wink. “Because we had the room, I made the walk-in shower bigger than you requested,” she said, motioning to the shower. “You can fit six people in there easily.”
“Great. That’ll come in handy for all those orgies I have,” she said dryly.
Stephanie ignored her as she walked over to the corner and the Jacuzzi tub. “I know the window is not that big, but it’s all the wall space I could spare.”
The tub had been an afterthought. She was mainly a shower person, always had been. But ever since the spa day with Reagan, she’d looked at Jacuzzi tubs differently. She stared at it now, picturing herself using it, relaxing after a long day—a glass of wine, a view of the mountains. She looked at the opposite end, imagining Reagan joining her. She turned away quickly. More than four months had passed since the wedding. Why would she think it would be Reagan she’d share a bath with?
“What’s wrong? You don’t like it?”
Shelby forced a smile to her face. “No. I love it. Really.”
Stephanie’s face dropped. “It’s too much, isn’t it? I just thought—”
Shelby held her hand up, stopping Stephanie’s apology. “No. I really do love it.” She widened her smile. “I’ll probably spend all of my time in here taking bubble baths.”
“Well, I hope you’ll spend most of your time in the kitchen since you were so adamant about that,” Stephanie said.
“Yes, I’m going to love the kitchen. Thank you,” she said as they left the bedroom.
“Better you than me,” Stephanie said. “I’ve never enjoyed cooking. I’m glad Josh does or we’d starve to death,” she said with a laugh.
“You’ve spent a lot of time up here. Has he been okay with that?”
She grinned. “Absence makes for great sex.”
Shelby held her hand up. “Please. I do not need to hear about your love life.”
Stephanie linked arms with her as they went back into the living area. “Married life is really, really nice,” she said. “I hope you get to experience it someday.”
“Well, if I ever meet my Princess Charming, I’ll snatch her up,” she said good-naturedly. “Until then, I’ll take your word for it.”
“Yeah, but I think you have to actually date in order to meet her. You, my beautiful sister, have done none of that.” Stephanie looked at her with raised eyebrows. “The last date you’ve been on was before my wedding.”
“Keeping tabs, are you?”
“Yes. It’s going on five months. What’s going on?”
She shook her head. “Nothing. I’ve been busy, as you know.”
Stephanie’s expression softened. “Why don’t you call her?”
Shelby didn’t pretend not to know who she was talking about. “Has Josh heard from her?”
She nodded. “Yes. She was evasive though. Told him she had a long road trip planned and not to worry about her.”
Shelby frowned. “What does that mean?”
Stephanie shrugged. “Don’t know. But he said she sounded like her old self.”
“Good. Maybe time away was what she needed.”
“But you still have no intention of calling her?”
“What for? Like you said, it’s going on five months.” She walked away from her, trying to sound as nonchalant as she could. “We had a little fling, Steph, that’s it. Don’t start thinking it’s some fairy tale or something. It’s not.”
“But you were so cute together. Have you seen the wedding pictures?”
“I have,” she said, although she’d purposely skipped over the ones with her and Reagan in them. “And we were cute because we were wearing matching colors.”
Stephanie stared at her. “I think you both fell a little bit in love.”
Shelby laughed, although it sounded forced to her ears. “Don’t be ridiculous. You don’t fall in love in twelve days. In lust, maybe, but not love.”
“So the sex was good?” Stephanie asked, her voice dropping to a near whisper.
“I don’t want to hear about your sex life…you don’t get to hear about mine,” she said.
Stephanie’s laughter rang out. “If she’s anything like Josh…ooh, la la.”
Shelby laughed too. “Enough. Back to all this,” she said, waving her hand at the room. “Can I be in by next weekend?”
“Yes. I’ll line up the movers.”
She took another look around at what was soon to become her new home. Bigger than even her current apartment, it no longer resembled the small suite she’d called her own for the last few years. She was suddenly very anxious to move here. Spring was in the air and summer would be right behind it. She had a wonderful view out of her office and bedroom windows. She was only a short drive from the national park. She would have endless biking and hiking trails at her disposal. It would be perfect. And in time, she’d meet more of the locals and make new friends. It would be a good move. She was feeling stagnant in Denver as it was.
Yes, it would be a good move. She needed a change, she decided. Maybe that would chase her blue mood away…a blue mood that had followed her since Christmas.
Chapter Forty-Two
The place was a mess, but she didn’t care. Boxes were stacked in the kitchen and those were the third ones she tackled. Her bedroom was set up and her bathroom boxes were unpacked enough for her to manage a shower, at least, but the boxes in the kitchen had to go. She refused to order room service for a second night. Of course, unpacking boxes wouldn’t fill her fridge and pantry.
She should have taken Stephanie up on her offer to help her unpack. But it was Friday, and she knew Stephanie hadn’t been home much this week. She’d waved her offer away and told her to go home to Josh and enjoy the weekend.
Which is what she planned to do. The weather was perfect for late May and she wanted to get out to Bear Lake and take in a hike in the morning. Most of the elk had probably already moved up to the higher elevations, following the snow melt, but maybe she’d find a herd still milling around.
She opened up a large box, pulling out her old cast-iron wok. It was well seasoned, but she couldn’t recall the last time she’d used it. She made a mental note to plan a stir-fry for dinner next week as she tucked it into a drawer. She unpacked the boxes methodically, putting her most used items within easy reach. However, she lost interest in her task with four boxes done and three more still to go.
She leaned against the island, surveying the mess around her. It suddenly became too daunting of a task to finish.
“Nothing wrong with room service,” she murmured with a sigh.
With that, she grabbed her key and wallet and headed to the door. Maybe a trip to the grocery store would restore her good mood. She’d never minded grocery shopping. In fact, she found it relaxing.
But once she got downstairs, she glanced toward the bar, seeing Zach behind the counter, stacking shot glasses. She glanced at her watch. It was nearly five. Perhaps the grocery store could wait.
Zach gave her a smile as she sat down at the bar. “Hey, Shelby. I heard you were moving in this weekend.”
“Yes. I’m in the process of unpacking. It couldn’t hold my interest any longer though,” she said.
He nodded in understanding. “You want a beer or something?”
