10

  Sydney’s heart felt like it was going to jump out of her chest. She raked a hand through her hair and stood up to smooth down her clothes and make sure her blazer wasn’t a wrinkled mess.

  She didn’t even have time to process what had just happened. She was more concerned with Kerri finding out. Because she imagined that Ada would never want her to know.

  “Act normal,” Sydney muttered to herself as she sat down again, wine glass in hand, trying to look casual.

  Ada’s sultry voice traveled down the hall. “Another late night visit? Is this a regular thing now?”

  A burning sensation swept across her chest. Were Ada and Kerri together? Is that why Kerri had that reaction when Sydney told her Ada was her dream woman?

  A wave of nausea washed over her when she thought of Ada and Kerri having some kind of friends-with-benefits situation. Or worse. That they were secretly dating.

  ‘Hope you’re not waiting for Ada.’

  Sydney sucked in a breath, questioning the meaning of anything Kerri had ever said about Ada.

  Kerri’s voice was clear now, just a few feet away. “When you don’t answer your phone I get worried, okay? Especially after I saw those photos. And then I couldn’t get ahold of either of you. You know where my mind goes… I thought something might have happened.”

  Sydney’s jealousy was dampened by the way Kerri’s voice dropped. She’d never been in the habit of ignoring Kerri’s calls like she had tonight, but now, knowing the anxiety that might cause her, knowing what happened to Brandon, she promised herself never to do it again, no matter what mood she was in.

  “Well, the reason she’s not answering her phone is because she’s here,” Ada said as she entered the room with Kerri behind her.

  Sydney lifted the hand she’d tried to casually drape across the back of the couch. “Sorry.”

  Kerri nodded, her lips pressed together before she exhaled. “Right. So, everyone’s okay? No crazy paparazzi incidents?”

  “You know my driver can handle it,” Ada said, as cool as could be, and Sydney wished she could use her acting skills as well as Ada could in her everyday life, when the cameras weren’t focused on her. “Sydney’s car wasn’t there, so I told her to get in with me, and we were just having another drink before calling it a night.”

  Sydney nodded, an unsettling heaviness coming over her. That was it. Nothing else was going to happen tonight.

  Kerri eyes moved between both of them, and for a second, Sydney thought she knew, but then she shoved her hands in her pockets, her voice completely normal. “Sydney, do you want a ride home?”

  Sydney pushed herself off the couch. “Sure. That’d be great.” She swallowed the lump down her throat, daring herself to meet Ada’s eyes, hoping to see something, anything, that would let her go home tonight thinking that this was the start of something rather than a moment of madness that Ada was already regretting.

  “Night,” Ada said with a half-smile, her arms wrapped around herself, and Sydney desperately wished she was confident enough to offer Ada a hug, but she wasn’t.

  “Goodnight.” Sydney searched her honey brown eyes, but there was nothing more than a friendly goodbye in them.

  Sydney left without looking back, not able to witness how Kerri might say goodnight to Ada. Would she get a hug? A kiss on the cheek? Or worse?

  Sydney pulled open the heavy front door, slowly descending the steps until she was standing beside Kerri’s car, still feeling sick, although she didn’t know why. Jealousy? Was she angry with herself for not saying something more? Although she didn’t know when she could have done that.

  The lights flashed as Kerri unlocked her car, and Sydney got in, trying to remember how to act like a normal human being.

  “You okay?” Kerri asked once they were on the road.

  “Yeah. We were just chased for a while. But it was nothing to worry about.”

  “I have no idea how they found you. Ada’s been there probably a dozen times and never had any trouble.”

  “Probably a waiter or something.”

  “And now you’re all over the internet again,” Kerri said softly. It wasn’t an accusation, but Sydney didn’t know how to respond without giving herself away. “Don’t fall for her, Syd.” Kerri glanced over at her before returning her eyes to the road. “I know that look.”

  Sydney forced herself not to ask Kerri what was going on with them, not to tell Kerri what really happened with Ada tonight, even just to get a reaction.

  Sydney stopped herself from asking Kerri what she meant. She’d probably say that she shouldn’t fall for Ada because she was straight. But Sydney knew that wasn’t true, but she couldn’t question it. She just knew that Ada wouldn’t want Kerri to know. That was the only thing Sydney was sure of now.

  11

  Ada poured herself another glass of wine and brought it outside, knowing that she wasn’t going to get much sleep tonight, and sat on the white sofa looking out over her pool and the lights of Los Angeles. She left the outside lights off and looked up, wishing she could see the stars.

  Ada unlocked her phone and took it off silent mode before she scrolled through dozens of posts filled with photos of the two of them from tonight. She should be panicking right now.

  Sydney knew her secret, and as Ada replayed the evening, she had no idea how she even got to that point. Had she really been that desperate to tell someone? Someone new. Someone who wasn’t Kerri.

  Ada took a drink. Maybe she should have switched the wine out for something stronger. She was still relatively sober. So she couldn’t blame any of what happened on alcohol.

  She refreshed the feed and kept scrolling.

  #Addney

  At least her name was first.

  But why wasn’t she panicking?

  Ada’s thumb slowed as her eyes landed on a new photo, one that captured the moment Ada had reached for Sydney’s hand, right before she’d tugged Sydney into the car.

  It looked like they were holding hands. Like they were actually together.

  Ada stared at the screen, waiting for that sudden, overwhelming sense of dread to envelop her, when she realized that she’d made a mistake, that she shouldn’t have tipped off those photographers, that she couldn’t handle the world thinking that she was gay.

  But it wasn’t happening.

  The only thing she felt was a little agitated.

  And it was because the focus of all these posts wasn’t on Ada’s sexuality. It was on Sydney and the fact that she was the world’s most eligible lesbian. Apparently. Ada hadn’t realized how much attention was around her.

  Every tabloid post was asking who would be seen next with Sydney Lockett. Who would be the lucky one to get her to settle down?

  Ada blew out a breath. This was not how she saw tonight going. In so many ways.

  Tonight was supposed to be a publicity stunt that brought her more attention, except no one seemed to care about her. But right now, that was the least of Ada’s concerns.

  A flash of anger took over, clouding her thoughts.

  She was jealous, and she hated it. Sydney was everything that Ada had wanted to be, and if that wasn’t enough, Ada had almost slept with her.

  Her phone pinged.

  Unknown

  Thanks for tonight. I had a really nice time and I didn’t get a chance to say that before I left.

  I got your number from Kerri. Hope that’s okay.

  …

  Ada bit her lip as she waited for the next message to come in, her heart pounding as she closed her eyes, images of Sydney’s dark eyes raking over her playing across her mind. Ada shuddered, the feeling of Sydney’s lips on hers so vivid, the chemistry off the charts.

  Ada’s eyes fluttered open as her phone chimed again.

  I didn’t say anything to her.

  She exhaled, her heart still racing as her thumbs hovered over the screen.

  Ada had mentally cursed Kerri for showing up like that and interrupting them, but now, she knew that Kerri had saved her from making a huge mistake.

  Ada shouldn’t have told Sydney about Brandon. She should have given her the same response she gave everyone else. That she was fine. That she wasn’t interested in meeting anyone else. That she’d lost her best friend almost ten years ago and that she had to find a way to live with that loss.

  It was all true, but yet, she couldn’t get herself to say those words to Sydney.

  Ada put her phone down without replying. There was nothing to say. She knew that she couldn’t lead Sydney on.

  Sydney was out there, openly dating whoever she wanted, having a great time, and why shouldn’t she? She’d just won her first major award. She was only thirty. She had it all out in front of her.

  And as Ada sipped her wine, she blinked back tears, knowing that she had to forget about what happened tonight.

  It was too late for her.

  And she was too old for Sydney.

  She reached for her phone, typing out a message to Kerri.

  I’m bored. I need a new project.

  12

  Two weeks later and Sydney still found herself grabbing her phone every time it beeped in the hope that Ada had finally replied to her.

  Since Sydney hadn’t been photographed with anyone else since then, the internet was still pining over #Addney. Neither of them had commented about it, so that kept the rumors circulating, and Sydney hated how she was right there with her fans, wishing that it could be real.

  She could have brought a date to the awards show, and maybe she should have, because as she placed her hand on her hip and posed for the cameras, she missed having someone beside her.

  Although if the last two weeks were anything to go by, it would be a long time before Sydney would be able to think of anyone other than Adelaide Atwood.

  “Sydney! Sydney! Over here!” The shouts from photographers brought her back to the present, and she strolled a few more paces along the red carpet before stopping again.

  She turned, angling her body towards the cameras without smiling, and out of the corner of her eye, she caught a glimpse of a brunette in a scarlet red dress getting out of a limo. Sydney naturally posed again, this time letting her gaze linger, waiting for the woman to appear behind the photographers that surrounded the car, so that she could see that it wasn’t Ada.

  Except it was her.

  Sydney’s heart stopped, and she couldn’t stop staring. Adelaide Atwood was stunning. And she looked every bit the superstar she was, completely unfazed by the commotion around her.

  Images of that night two weeks ago flashed before Sydney’s eyes, of Ada sitting across from her on the couch, of the flirtatious glint in her eyes, of the way her lips had felt so perfect against her own.

  An interviewer was calling Sydney over, taking her away from her thoughts, but before she could tear her gaze away from Ada, Sydney saw her turn back towards the limo, extending her hand, and a tall, handsome man emerged, glancing down to button up his suit jacket before finding Ada’s hand.

  Sydney did the interview in a daze, nodding and smiling in the right places, mentioning the designer of her dress, but when she managed another look back in Ada’s direction, she could see the man much more clearly, posing beside her, his hand on her waist.

  The sight should have had her clenching her jaw, but when she realized who it was, it was all Sydney could do not to laugh.

  Adelaide Atwood had brought Finn Burke with her to the red carpet. He was a broadway sensation, and although he’d never official come out, everyone in the business knew he was gay.

  A slow smile came to Sydney’s lips as she stopped to take more photos. It was all an act. And although that thought brought her some comfort as she made her way down the red carpet, it wasn’t until she was seated inside, that it hit her.

  Ada was quenching those rumors about her and Sydney by bringing a man with her today. There was also the small problem of Ada ignoring her texts for the last two weeks.

  Sydney leaned forward in her seat, knowing exactly where to find her. When she looked to her left, her eyes landed on Ada laughing with Finn, just a few yards away, chatting with a couple sitting in the row behind them.

  Sydney sat back in her seat, unable to shake the feeling of loneliness that suddenly came over her.

  Adelaide Atwood was firmly in the closet, and Sydney had to go and fall for the most unavailable woman in Hollywood.

  13

  Ada’s heels echoed off the hallway walls as she avoided the lobby everyone was filing through on their way out of the awards ceremony. She’d already said goodnight to Finn, knowing that a young man had caught his eye almost as soon as he’d stepped onto the red carpet.

  If there was an award for Most Reliable Beard then Finn Burke would win it every time. They’d been there for each other more times than Ada could remember, and it was somehow still working, because the mainstream media continued to cling to the idea that they were having a very low key affair.

  Ada turned the corner, following the signs for the exit, and she nearly ran over Sydney, getting out of the way at the last minute.

  Ada’s hand came up to her chest as she reached out to press her palm against the wall to keep herself upright. “Lost?” she asked with a smirk as she started to breathe normally again, her eyes sweeping over Sydney.

  Ada couldn’t take her eyes off her all night. Her blond hair tumbled over her long black dress, her blue eyes bright. But Ada knew she was just one of hundreds. Even if Sydney hadn’t won tonight, she was solidifying her place among the best in this business. Sydney had everyone’s attention tonight, simply by being there, by being herself.

  “No.” Although Sydney looked beautiful, she was a little pale. “I just needed some air.”

  “You were unlucky.”

  Sydney’s eyebrows rose. “That’s all you have to say to me?”

  Ada stood up straight, avoiding Sydney’s eyes. “Forget about what happened,” she said, her voice colder than she’d intended.

  Sydney didn’t say anything for a moment, but when she did speak, it was in a hushed tone. “Because it wasn’t real or because you don’t want anyone to know?”

  Ada narrowed her eyes, but she brushed past her without saying anything, her stomach in knots, anger coursing through her veins.

  Ada hadn’t made it more than two steps away before she whirled around, Sydney’s fingers wrapped around her wrist.

  “Are you happy?” Sydney asked, her eyes searching Ada’s, her voice desperate.

  Ada scoffed as she tried to yank her wrist free, but Sydney held on, stepping into Ada’s space.

  “Because you deserve to be happy,” Sydney said, her voice thick with emotion. “You deserve to have someone on your arm who cares about you, who wants you for more than a photo-op.”

  Ada’s stomach twisted. Did Sydney know that she’d tipped off the paps?

  Sydney’s voice broke with huskiness. “Will you at least tell me if it was real?”

  Ada jerked her hand away. “Nothing in this town is real. You’ll see that once you’ve spent more than a few years here.”

  “Why can’t you just say it?”

  “Say what?”

  “That it didn’t mean anything.”

  “Sydney, I don’t how to make this any clearer. You need to forget about it.”

  And she stormed off without looking back, because if she did, Ada knew she’d cave. Another moment listening to Sydney’s voice cracking like that, and she was as good as gone.

  But that wouldn’t do either of them any good.

  Sydney was the one who deserved all those things.

  And Ada knew she’d never be able to make Sydney happy.

  14

  Sydney returned from her two month trip to Europe refreshed, staying for a few more weeks after the promo for her latest movie was finished to see as much as she could, spending some time in Italy, Spain, France, and Ireland.

  But as she unlocked her front door and wheeled her suitcase behind her, she was so glad to be back home. She’d unpack later. Right now, she wanted to relax in her backyard, and as she stepped outside with an iced coffee, the sun hot against her skin, she realized how much this space reminded her of Spain or Italy. Maybe it was the olive trees. Maybe it was the warmth of being out here this time of year, and the fact that they were finally coming into April and the temperatures were going to be in the seventies from now on.

  Sydney went back inside to take the letter-sized envelope from the top of the pile on the kitchen counter where her cleaner had left them, and she stood there staring at them for a minute, smiling to herself. Four or five years ago, she’d had to beg for auditions. Now, there was a stack of eight scripts here for her to read, and more would show up in the coming weeks, until she decided on her next project.

  She opened the envelope and slid the script out, grabbing a pair of sunglasses on her way out, ready to spend the next few hours getting lost in her next potential movie.

  Sydney’s phone buzzed from somewhere underneath her. She shifted her legs and looked behind the cushions on the couch, finding it and picking it up just in time.

  “Hey,” she answered with a smile. “I’m back in the country.”

  Kerri laughed. “I know. I’m on my way to your place if you’re free. I have some news.”

  “Yeah, of course. Let yourself in. I’m out back.”

  Sydney stood up and left her shades on the coffee table before she stretched her arms over her head. She was happy. She really was. For the most part.

  She was starting to wonder if there was something wrong with her though, because she’d turned down more than one very attractive older woman while she was away.

 

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10