Can't Take My Eyes Off You, page 5
‘I don’t know, Will,’ I say, sudden tears burning the backs of my eyeballs.
‘Wait a second,’ he says, his face suddenly lifting. ‘We’re best friends. Maybe friends don’t do some of the things we do but one thing they always do is talk…’
‘And that means?’
‘It means we can still be friends while I do the show.’
‘Friends?’ I ask. I think about this for a moment. ‘I dunno…’
‘Don’t mull it over silently – speak.’
‘I don’t want to be on the show, Will. If the world only knows you, the tabloids have no way of ruining us. Your family will be attempting that already and I can’t stand up to the wrath of the all-powerful Adler name.’
‘Tabloids?’ He laughs, moving to sit on the coffee table in front of me. ‘You think this is going to fly into popularity? Have you met Mike, Finn and Felicity?’
‘Yes,’ I remind him. ‘They’re a train wreck, all three of them; that’s binging material. You’ll be mingling with reality-show greats before the apartment is even finished.’
‘No way,’ he says, shaking his head.
‘You do realize you could have gotten a job at McDonald’s, and I’d still love you, right? I’m not with you because you have an outrageous trust fund.’
‘I think you’d love the discount you’d get on food if I worked there most,’ he jokes.
So I have a palate of a five-year-old. It’s comfort food.
‘But yes, I know. I’m in this now, and I’m sorry I hurt you, truly. I also hurt me in the process. I’ve lain in bed for two weeks, mourning our relationship while trying to find some way to apologize properly and get you back.’
‘I’ve got a hundred and sixty-eight of those apologies in my apartment right now.’
He’s sent me flowers every day since I tossed him to the curb. He and the florist are probably on a first-name basis.
‘Yet I know you’re still the most beautiful thing in that apartment.’
‘Bianca’s going to be offended,’ I joke. We are living together until our apartment is ready. My apartment. God, that’s weird. Who knows if he’ll ever even live there. I can’t think about it or I’ll be in a ball of tears on the floor of my shower when I get home. A place I’ve been too many times over the last couple of weeks as it is.
‘Friends don’t call each other beautiful,’ I say.
‘Yes they do.’
‘Well, you can’t because it makes me miss you.’
He smirks. ‘Missing me is bad?’
‘In this situation, yes.’
‘Do you think I’m capable of not missing you every second you’re not around? We text two hundred times a day. Our Snapchats are busy. Who are you going to call at two in the morning when you wake from a bad dream? Hell, who will I call throughout the day to say something I know you’ll love just because I know it’ll make you smile? Miss isn’t even a strong enough word. For you, Berkley, I pine. Covet. Desire. Need. Crave. Yearn. Thirst.’ He’s listing off words as he grabs my hand, pulling it to his chest like he’s acting out a Shakespeare scene. ‘Shall I go on?’ He pauses the dramatics.
‘No, no, I get it. Maybe we make some rules?’
‘Rules?’ he asks, finally back to his serious self.
‘Yeah,’ I say, standing from the couch and pacing around the room. It’s what I do when I’m mulling things over. Things I already know the answer to but am trying to justify that answer to guarantee the outcome I want. I’m human. ‘You know how sometimes I have terrible ideas, and you go along with them?’
‘Most of those ideas end up low-key brilliant; however, the truck-stop sushi to save on time is suddenly racing back to me.’
I gasp. ‘I forgot about that one. Worst getaway weekend ever.’
‘Worst sushi ever,’ he corrects me. ‘Nicest hotel bathroom, though. Thank God that you love me no matter what, right?’
Our eyes meet as we both freeze. I love him no matter what? Damn it. That’s why this is so hard. I want to love him through this but I know I should walk away. Then again, like he said, we are friends and friends support friends.
‘This might be crazy, but what if… We’re breaking up, I get that, but isn’t there usually some leeway in that?’
‘Leeway?’
‘Yeah.’ He nods enthusiastically, now standing in front of me. ‘You wanted to make rules – let’s do it. Rule number one: friends do tell one another they’re beautiful.’
I roll my eyes. ‘Fine, beautiful boy. Rules number two, three and four: friends do not flirt, friends do not date and friends definitely do not say the L word.’ I lift a finger with each new rule.
‘L for lettuce, I agree, moving on.’ He tries to blow past it but I hold out a hand to stop him.
‘Love, Will. I’m talking about saying we love one another. We’re spending the next two years broken up, so no lovey-dovey stuff. My heart can’t take it.’
He frowns hard, rubbing the back of his neck frustratedly. ‘Rule number five: the closure clause,’ he says suddenly. ‘May I present my idea?’
‘I can only imagine what this is going to be.’
‘Imagine it, Berx. This is going to be difficult. You may pine for me too. And if you do, we can use the closure clause. I’ve heard when people who’ve dated long-term break up, they often have a few relapses before the break-up takes. After that they walk away.’
‘And if I do the math you did on the phone calls earlier, I’d assume a few is like twenty-five in your mind?’
He steps closer, a crooked smile on his face as he grabs one of my hands. ‘Berkley, I’m serious. We’ve dated for seven years. I hurt you, and ruined our plans for the unforeseen future, but I’m in this and it’s going to be hard for us to just stop seeing one another. If I had to guess I’d say there might be times where we can’t help but call one another and why can’t we be who we were in those moments. I want to be able to wean off of you if I have to do this.’
My heart slows. This is really happening. He really can’t get out of this and everything is going to change.
‘We get three relapses and after that, we stick with the meeting up for coffee when it’s all over to see if anything is left.’
Three relapses? It sounds so sad, yet kind of romantic. Like a romance book.
‘OK?’ I say, unsure if it’s the right answer or not, but not knowing how else to do this.
‘And tonight we get a freebie,’ he throws in, sliding his hands around my waist.
‘There it is, the road to more than three: freebies.’ I laugh. ‘We can’t break the rules on day number one.’
‘Why not? Only we will ever know,’ he says, lowering his voice.
‘I have a sinking suspicion that I will regret this, but alright, I’m in. Those are the rules. Shall we shake to make it official?’
‘No,’ Will says, pulling me against him and planting a kiss on my lips and just like I always do, I melt into him. God, I missed him.
Here we go. PDX Royals vs. Berkley Kaine. How bad could it possibly be?
6
BERKLEY
Six Months Later, December 2020
PDX ROYALS FANS – MEET THE STARS
HELLO, PDX ROYALS! Apparently, giant trust funds are all you need to be considered American royalty, and these four singles fit the bill. This brand new show has captured the heart of reality-television lovers all over the country and has secured four guaranteed seasons of chaos you can’t look away from. With only three episodes airing so far, the show has garnered the highest rankings on the E! since we started keeping up with the Kardashians.
Based in Portland, Oregon, the show follows the lives of siblings Mike and Will Adler along with Finn and Felicity Harper. All bets are off on future storylines as the cast find their way into adulthood – and possible love – while living life off trust funds their parents have rules on and partying at the most elite clubs in the city. Which of the four will grab your heart? Let’s meet our stars!
Finn Harper is the oldest at twenty-seven. As a gourmet food blogger and chef, he is focused on finding the best food in the city while looking for love in all the wrong places. Club bathrooms and fancy cars are the settings for his romantic shenanigans – careful googling that. Finn’s already made quite the name for himself online. Let’s just say that Kardashian sex tape is nothing compared to what we’ve dug up on Lord Finn of PDX.
Next up is self-proclaimed ‘King’ Mikey Adler, twenty-six. As a club promoter-slash-property investor, the ‘big dog on campus’ is on every VIP list in town and sees himself as the show’s star. After all, it’s one of his viral videos that caught the attention of the network to begin with. Swagger and charm are Mikey’s game, and women flock to this stunner – or maybe it’s the way he throws around that black card? Either way, watch out because money and power are the keys to his heart, and if you get in the way, you might find yourself at the mercy of his powerful parents, Jacob and Melinda Adler, who own half the city and protect their eldest son fiercely.
Felicity Harper is the lone princess of the group. At twenty-five, she’s already proved to be quite the fashion and makeup influencer. Felicity’s social media following dwarfs the guys’ many times over. Between clubbing almost nightly, working on her ever-expanding brands and posting to her dedicated social media followers hourly, she wears heart eyes for none other than Willy Adler. The two have a love-hate thing that we can’t wait to see play out.
Speaking of Willy Adler, he’s the youngest of the group at twenty-three and the most mysterious of the four. He hates the ‘prince’ title his brother has given him and seems reluctant to interact with the cast more than necessary. We dug into his background and discovered he graduated from PSU with a masters in business management last year but hasn’t yet put his newly acquired skills to work. Willy’s head appears to be somewhere else, and he drowns his sorrows with many alcoholic beverages. Do I smell a drinking problem on the way? Possibly. We’re here for the drama that will follow this cast twenty-four-seven while filming.
The show airs on E! every Sunday at 9:00 p.m. PST. Who will you fall in love with?
Only three episodes have aired and just like I predicted, it’s an instant hit. His face is everywhere. Online. Social media. Tabloids. I’ve even seen promo billboards on the freeway. I will never get used to seeing him like this.
I throw the tabloid onto the front counter. Why’d they have to go and make him look like the lost-in-life loser of the bunch? How dare they make Felicity look like she has any chance with him, too. Though I am glad they nailed Mike and Finn’s douchey personalities, that only tells me they plan to focus on the two who have the potential for the most drama. Sigh. I have a feeling I’m up for some heartbreaking Sunday nights.
The rules between Will and I still stand. We’ve been broken up for six months now and had one relapse night (not counting the previous ‘freebie’). My phone still blows up with his texts and he tells me everything as it happens – so he says – so I’m not entirely in the dark, but we try to keep our interactions phone-based and not face to face. Too many chances to screw things up.
‘Ooh,’ Olivia says excitedly, approaching the counter where I’m working, her eyes on the magazine. ‘This is so weird! We know famous people! You’ve had sex with a famous person!’
I laugh. ‘Say it a little louder, would ya? I’m not sure Gunner’s reading group heard you.’
Olivia is my assistant manager and life-long best friend. We run To Be Read, the bookstore I fell in love with as a teen. Will, Olivia and I all worked here as teenagers. We’re far more professional now, mostly. She and I each run a section, and things run relatively smoothly.
Liv’s one year older than me and a chronic dater of all the wrong guys. Her natural dark-as-night hair flows down her back in big beach waves I’m jealous of. She’s tall, curvy, wears a lot of eyeliner on her big brown eyes and has the most beautiful dewy light-brown skin. She’s absolutely gorgeous. Her parents met when her mother was on a girls’ vacation in Mexico and claimed it was love at first sight. She swears in Spanish, has perfected the eye roll, and she’s not afraid of anything.
Her specialty within the store is mystery, thriller and crime. She loves a whodunit and is currently attempting to write her own. I’ve read what she has, and I’d buy the hell out of it. She’s a true-crime junkie whose knowledge of how that world works is so extensive I’m sometimes a little scared she might one day be able to carry out the perfect murder. And I’ll be the girl helping dispose of the body.
Originally, To Be Read was Frank’s shop (the owner). But after his last stroke, he retired, and Olivia and I took over. He allowed me to refurb my apartment upstairs and now To Be Read is my happy place. If only everywhere I looked I didn’t see a certain someone who helped design said apartment. I’m dealing. Kind of.
Liv rolls her eyes playfully. ‘I can’t believe they made the cover! But, ugh, why must they all be so picture-perfect?’
‘All their flaws are internal, remember?’
She laughs, nodding her head. ‘While our flaws are visible, and we’re perfect on the inside. Did you read it yet?’
‘Yep.’
‘And?’
‘They made it seem like a love story will be their main focus. One I will not be involved in.’
‘Eh.’ She grimaces. ‘That’s no good. I told you you should have been on camera some.’
I lower my chin, shooting her half a glare as I straighten up the front counter. ‘I’m not competing for him. I broke up with him so he wouldn’t expect me to do exactly that and so my name would stay out of articles—’
‘Exactly like this.’ She finishes my sentence for me. ‘So, you’re just going to continue a digital forbidden love affair when really, you’re madly in love, and fighting this break-up like nothing I’ve ever witnessed?’
‘It’s complicated, Liv. He’s my best friend, but I can’t be his girlfriend through this because I don’t know if I can trust him on the show. I’ve seen exactly three episodes and he’s already broken his record for how much he can drink; the award for stupidity isn’t that far a reach now.’
‘Yeah, yeah, he may as well have a double life. I know, we’ve had this conversation daily since it happened,’ she says like it all annoys her, but really, she asks for those daily updates.
She flips the tabloid open to the article, holding a single finger in the air – her shut the hell up finger. Clients approach and Liv scoots down the counter, tabloid and all, never once looking up.
‘Did you find everything you were looking for?’
‘We did,’ one of the young women says, setting half a dozen magazines onto the counter.
I ring them up one by one; each has Will’s gorgeous face staring back at me. PDX Royals and the cast is the headline on all of them and each one pisses me off a little more. Two years of this won’t be annoying at all.
‘They didn’t even mention you!’ Liv says a little too loudly, startling the woman working the card reader. ‘Can you believe that?! They call themselves paparazzi, and they don’t know you’re in the background doing the star of the show?’
‘Liv… shh.’
She shakes her head. ‘I’m telling you, Berx, you two gotta use one of those free bones over at Will’s place, so the whole world won’t think he’ll eventually fornicate with “Princess” Felicity. Blech, I can’t believe they titled her that.’
‘Wait,’ one of the women in front of me says. ‘You two know them?’ She points at the tabloid in Liv’s hand, her head flipping between us as she awaits our answer.
‘Uh, no?’ I keep my cool while lying, but Olivia doesn’t play along. She nods her head obnoxiously.
‘This one here’s been sleeping with Prince Willy for seven years, ladies. Spread the word. For all we care, Princess Felicity can be locked into a castle tower by an evil dragon.’
Prince Willy. When it was announced that a douchey video of Mike’s smug self was what attracted the network to them – episode one – he named himself King Mikey. You know, because of the show’s title, PDX Royals. Finn was quick to call himself Lord Finn, even applied to become one like Scott Disick did once. Stupid as fuck. But that meant by ridiculous rich-boy rules made up by the king himself, Will needed a title too, and by default of Mike being king, he proclaimed his little brother Prince Willy. A name he’s come to loathe but has developed a party boy personality for in front of the cameras in only three episodes.
‘Liv!’ I bark, lifting my hands palms up when our eyes meet.
‘What?’ She heaves a sigh, turning to the women. ‘Strike that, ladies. William Adler is a jobless liar and probably a future cheater, so trust me when I say you don’t want anything to do with him.’
‘Not better,’ I groan.
‘Maldito!’ Liv exclaims.
‘Forget you heard any of that,’ I tell the women. ‘We don’t know them. We’re fans daydreaming, just like you. Thanks for coming in.’ I hand them their receipt and pray to the tabloid gods that they don’t know a single reporter.
As soon as the doors close, I shoot Olivia a glare. ‘No more public chatter about Will and me,’ I command. ‘I don’t want cameras up my ass or my name floating around in these magazines. God knows what they’ll say.’
‘The attention could be a free advertisement for the shop. Did you ever think of that?’
‘Yes, I did. Not worth it. We’re now known as the most popular bookstore in town because of our skills, not because my legs open like saloon doors for the city’s newest prince.’
She laughs. ‘Like you don’t enjoy it.’
‘We’re broken up,’ I remind her; it’s the only way to keep a leash on my heart. Remind myself we’re broken up. He’s free to date whoever he wants. As am I. And eventually, maybe we will. ‘You’re encouraging me to date, so if you want that to ever happen, I’d stop reminding me of the sex I occasionally have had with Prince Willy. It’s absolutely nothing; we’re just weaning apart.’
