A Nightingale for the Lonely Duke, page 26
‘My lord, I am so very grateful that you have felt that you could say those things to me. Please, you do not need to fear rejection, for that is certainly not what you will receive from these lips. I too, have loved you for a long time, longer than I ought, given the circumstances that you were in. Yet, even when I knew, I ought not to love, I simply could not help myself. One does not choose who one falls in love with. It is instead, like some overpowering pull toward another, that can neither be held back, nor stopped. I can say, my lord, with my hand on my. Heart, that I would not wish it to be stopped, nor would I wish it to be held back.’
‘Oh, Miss Goodwin, you have no concept of how gratefully my ears receive your words. I was so doubtful that after all that had happened between us, that you would never be able to find it in your heart to forgive me.’’
‘No, my lord. That could never happen, for when you love someone, you see that person for all their good parts and their bad, and you love all those parts as a whole.’
The Duke suddenly took her two hands in his and gazed down at her with a deep affection in his eyes, and Alina could hardly believe that this was not some sort of dream that she would awaken from at any given moment. When she thought of all those desperate days thinking of what could have been and wallowing in her unhappiness, she could never have imagined that this could have been the outcome.
It had appeared that life had created some sort of miracle, for whilst she had given up hope that she could ever be happy again, it had provided her with the only man she had ever loved apart from her father. After all the troubles she and her mother had experienced, things finally appeared to be going well, and Alina almost felt as though all of their troubles had been some sort of test of her resilience.
In fact, as she thought about all of their tribulations, she could not help but think of how much she had grown since the death of her father. Once a young woman who relied on other’s to provide her security and look after the important things in life, she had quickly become the provider, and the one who had taken the responsibility in the best way she knew how. If her father could see her now, she knew he would be proud of her. Who knew, perhaps, somewhere, he was watching over her.
The door to the drawing room suddenly flew open and Lady Rebecca near ran toward Alina. Dropping her hands, Alina turned toward Rebecca as she approached her with open arms, before throwing them about her in a warm and exuberant embrace.
‘Oh, Miss Alina. I am so thrilled to see you. I am so glad that you are here, and that Frederick has finally spoken to you,’ she said excitedly. ‘Is this not the best day, ever?’ She beamed.
In any other household, Rebecca’s actions would surely be looked down upon, for they would not be seen as behaviour befitting a lady, but Alina did not even correct her, nor did she even care. There had always been a specialness about Rebecca, and Alina had taken some time to realise, that all the elocution and deportment, should not to take away the person within. She had always been a breath of fresh air with her wonderful and lively approach. Alina would not change her for the world, for one ought not to lose oneself in this life.
After some further talking and catching up, Rebecca offered to play a waltz.
‘I think it is high time you both danced with each other properly. I will play, you will dance,’ she grinned.
Alina looked over at the Duke, who seemed to shrug in acceptance, though with a smile, as though he were not only humouring his sister for the sake of it. Placing his hands about her, and taking her hand in his, they stepped graciously to the music as Rebecca played and Alina once more, felt as though she were not truly living this moment.
That at any moment, she would waken. That was, of course, until Rebecca made a mistake in her piano playing. Frederick raised an eyebrow, for clearly, he had heard it to, but he silently shook his head at Alina with a warm smile. Today was not a day for Alina to tutor, or correct his younger sister, today was the beginning of their new lives together, and no misplacement of musical notes would take away from that.
Chapter 30
The soft wind of autumn tugged at the tendrils of hair that had once more, escaped from beneath her bonnet, yet Alina could not care less. With her arm securely linked in Frederick’s and Rebecca and Theresa walking a little distance behind them, they wandered around Hyde Park on a warm afternoon, simply enjoying their time together.
It had now been a month since they had declared their love for each other, and Alina could easily say that her circumstances had continually seemed to change for the better. Though, she had to admit that she struggled to control his mother, for the Dowager Duchess could be quite too much at times. Not in any derogatory way, in fact, quite the opposite.
A few days after she had arrived at the manor for the supposed piano demonstration, Fredrick had invited both herself and her mother to visit the manor for afternoon tea. He had explained that he did not want some large formal dinner to introduce the families, and that an informal tea seemed less forward and would hopefully not put herself or her mother under any pressure.
Quite the opposite had been true, much to the delight of Frederick. The Dowager Duchess could not have been more welcoming, and as the afternoon commenced, it appeared Bette and the Dowager engaged in much conversation.
Alina had wondered, at the time, whether it was because they had quite a few life experiences in common, for both had grown children and both had lost their husbands far before their time. To be honest, she had not cared what brought them together, for it had surprised both herself and Frederick, and yet, they could hardly say they had not been delighted at the same time.
What Alina struggled with the most, though, was the Dowagers constant praise, for if she was not complimenting on Alina’s beauty, it was her voice, and further to that, it was the great work she had managed to accomplish with Rebecca.
At first, Alina had been worried that Rebecca may become jealous given that her own mother made such a fuss over her, yet one look at the delighted beam on Rebecca’s face, had put those worries to rest. Clearly, Rebecca was quite elated at her mother’s praise, and afterward had told Alina that she loved the fact that her mother had ‘simply adored’ her.
Colonel Ford, whilst friendly and very welcoming, had been the perfect gentleman but had remained a quiet and contained presence. He did in fact, remind Alina of Frederick and though they were cousins, the Colonel was quite a few years older than Frederick. Alina had to wonder, once Frederick had lost his father, if the Colonel had not been a greater influence in his life than she had imagined.
It was nearly two weeks after that, when Frederick coincidentally, met Harvey in a gentleman’s club. Frederick had been going to meet another acquaintance, and as he had been waiting on that person at a table, he had heard his name being called across the room. Frederick had stated that he could not help but feel a certain resignation when Harvey approached him and asked him if he could sit with him for just a moment.
‘I am waiting upon a friend, Harvey,’ Frederick had said.
‘I promise, Frederick, I will not take up much of your time.’
Reluctantly, Frederick had allowed him to sit, with the provision that he must move along immediately if Frederick noted the friend he was waiting upon approaching.
Having agreed, Harvey had settled himself and after a moments apparent discomfort, had begun to speak.
‘I do not how to begin to apologise, Frederick. I have not been a good friend to you at all, and I can only tell you how ashamed I am of that. I do not wish for your forgiveness, for I am hardly deserving of it, yet, I do wish to tell you that I am truly sorry. Everything you said on that day that you refused to marry my sister and put us out of your home, was correct. She has put my family in great debt and her spoilt ways have put us in danger of ruin. I have no excuses for trying to push her onto you. I suppose, I was just under such pressure from my family to do so, yet, if I am honest, I would not wish her upon any man. I ought to have been honest with you from the start, but the truth is, I have never truly been a good friend to you.’
Frederick relayed how Harvey had then spoken of their childhood and how he had not been a good person for a long time. He had treated Frederick horribly when they were children and he had done little better as they had become adults. Not wishing Harvey to stay longer than necessary, Frederick had said little, but had only listened.
‘I have said already, Frederick, that I do not deserve your forgiveness, yet I do wonder, if perhaps, we cannot start again as friends. I do not expect a lot from you, for it is I, who have something to prove. Yet, I can only ask that you give me another chance.’
Harvey had offered an olive branch, and whilst Alina still remained doubtful of the man’s intentions, for it would take more than a confession for her to trust him again, Frederick, being the wonderful gentleman he was, had accepted it. This news, of course, had quite delighted Rebecca, which came as no surprise, for the younger woman’s interest in Harvey had been quite obvious to Alina the very first time she had observed them together. Who knew, perhaps Harvey could change. Alina would not deter Rebecca or Frederick, but for herself, she was determined to hold back and wait for the proof of his promises.
As they continued on their slow stroll, Alina could feel Frederick’s movement beside her, and as she looked up at him, she noted him gazing down upon her.
‘How am I so fortunate to have met such a wonderful woman as you, my dear Alina?”
‘Oh, I do not know, I suppose one has to come upon some luck sooner or later.’ Alina grinned.
Frederick chuckled before continuing, ‘I wanted to talk to you about something that I feel deeply about, though I do know already, that you may not like it.’
‘I see.’ Alina frowned. ‘Ought I to be worried?’
‘Not at all, Alina. It is simply this. You have spent the last several months looking after everyone else. The house, your mother, all the heavy responsibilities and the bills, and so on. All this burden has fallen on your shoulder’s Alina, and life has not been very fair to you. I think it is perhaps time that someone else looked after you. It is for that reason, that I desire you to stop working. It is no longer necessary…’
‘I cannot do that, Frederick,’ Alina said firmly. ‘If I have learned one thing over the last few months, it is not to rely on another for the outcome of my future. My father meant no harm, yet had I known what was really happening, all that I have experienced, could have been prevented.’
‘Yes, but then, we would never have met.’
Alina could not deny his point. ‘Yes, that is true.’
‘So then, perhaps, it all happened for a reason.’
‘I will not relinquish my independence, Frederick.’
‘I would not want you to, Alina, for that is one of the many things I love about you. Yet what if I told you, you would have your own funds provided to you, to spend on whomever and whatever you desired? Would that not also be independence?’
Alina frowned deeply, for whilst it did sound as though it were independence, it would not be money that she had earned herself. Besides, where was this fund suddenly to spring from?
Frederick suddenly stopped and turned her toward him. ‘I love you, Alina. I want to spend the rest of my days on this earth with you by my side. I am asking you to be my wife. What is mine will be yours, my heart, my soul, my time and everything else that comes with it. Will you Alina, will you become my wife?’
It was wholly unexpected and whilst her head nodded in acceptance, she struggled to get the words from her suddenly tightened throat. Eventually, a croak of a reply escaped.
‘Yes, Frederick. Yes, of course I will marry you. I love you completely.’
Somewhere in the background, a squeal of delight escaped form Rebecca, though she and Theresa did not approach them. Not until quite some time afterwards, anyway.
***
The wedding was held at St James Church nearly eight months later. Of course, Alina had chosen Rebecca to be her bridesmaid, for apart from the fact that they were going to become sisters, Alina and Rebecca had also become the best of friends. They had spoken many times over the eight months, for along with both mothers, there had been much preparation to do. Rebecca had declared how delighted she was to have a new sister, and that she could hardly believe that, nearly a year ago, it could quite easily have been Lady Richardson. A thought that had given both women shills.
Alina could not say her nerves were in a shambles, given the high level of upper class who were both invited and had attended, and all the dignitaries, including many friends from Frederick’s army days. Harvey and Honoria had both been invited, for Frederick did not want to cause any tension between the families, given that they had such connections that went back for generations, but whilst Harvey had gladly accepted and had attended, Honoria had done neither.
Harvey explained to Frederick that she had felt humiliated at his rebuff and could not possibly imagine being at his wedding, given the stock that he was marrying. Frederick had nearly laughed when he had relayed this to Alina.
‘It appears, my darling wife-to be, that you are now cattle. How does that make you feel?’
Alina was well used to Frederick’s light heartedness and sense of humour and had only shook her head with a broad smile. ‘It could have been worse, I could have been a squealing pig.’
‘That is true, but no matter. I have a feeling that Honoria will get her comeuppance one of these days. I have always believed that those of similar personalities connect to each other, and if that is indeed the case, then they will both deserve each other.’
The church had been so very grand inside, the huge high ceilings with the most intricate and detailed artwork in the décor and strange, yet hypnotising architecture. She had chosen a beautiful blue gown that had impressed both mothers and Rebecca alike, for all of them had joined her in the shopping spree for the wedding attire. But no matter what the opinions were of the Dowager or of her mother and Rebecca, Alina had known it was the right choice, when Frederick had gazed upon her with almost breathless awe.
All those in attendance were invited back to Tomlinson Manor for a great wedding feast, where an array of fine foods had been prepared, from delicate meats, to blancmanges and jellies. Special sweet biscuits had been designed and a rather wonderful fruit cake was also cut and shared amongst everyone.
At one point, Alina watched the guests as she stood close to the wall at the side of the great ballroom. The joy and happiness warmed her heart as each and all enjoyed both the celebration and association. She had noticed that Colonel Ford had kept his distance from Harvey, but that had not surprised Alina. He was indeed, a shrewd gentleman and it was hardly a surprise, when she thought of what Harvey was willing to push on to their family.
Colonel Ford made a rather wonderful toast to the happy couple, and whereas, Alina might have had some reservations about people’s opinions, given that she was not previously a titled lady, no one who attended, appeared to care much about it.
‘I do not think I could be any more delighted for you, my dear.’ A soft tone whispered close to her ear, later on in the afternoon.
Alina turned to face Mr Guzman with a broad smile. ‘Thank you, Mr Guzman. I have so much to be grateful for, and much of it has been your doing.’
‘I do not know if that is entirely true, Miss…my lady.’ He grinned, suddenly correcting himself.
‘Oh,’ Alina said, feeling and sounding rather surprised.
‘Indeed, you are a lady now, Alina. Yet, in my eyes, you always were. You did not need a title for me to see you as such. I can only wish you the best of happiness for your future ahead.’
‘Thank you, Mr Guzman. I do hope, though, that we will still be able to see each other?’
‘Of course, my lady. I will always make time for my protégé.’
When everyone had finally departed, Alina retired to her bedchamber to change, for Frederick had promised to take her to the opera that very evening. Fixing her hair, Alina could not help but smile at herself in the long mirror as she thought of his earlier words. He had taken her out of sight of all the guests, escaping into his study for a few stolen moments alone.
