The Candidate, page 25
“Alex,” Jane said tensely between kisses. “I’m afraid.”
Alex’s roaming hands and demanding lips halted. “What are you afraid of, honey?”
Jane felt the heat of embarrassment rush up her neck. She tried to smile reassuringly, but the attempt dissolved into a grimace. “I’m not sure I’ll . . .” She was so afraid of this moment of truth, that Alex would discover she was a lousy lover, a fraud, and that the wait had been anything but worth it. She didn’t like this feeling of ineptness. It was so incredibly foreign to her. “I don’t know if I’ll be able to make you, you know, come.”
Alex buried her face in the pillow and laughed into it, her whole body shaking. She could not seem to stop and it stunned Jane, who didn’t think it was funny at all.
Perturbed, Jane took a deep breath, Alex’s laughter showing no signs of diminishing. “I expected my confession to horrify you, not amuse you.”
Alex finally stilled her laughter, though her body still spasmed a little. She looked at Jane, her eyes moist and still dancing mischievously. “Honey.” She took a deep breath to collect herself. “I can assure you, you won’t have any trouble making me come.”
Jane moved to straddle Alex. She was starting to feel a little roguish and a grin surfaced. “How can you be so sure?”
Alex’s eyes, unblinking, had grown serious. Arousal was coloring her cheeks; her chest rose and fell a little faster. “I just . . . have a feeling. But we’ll never know for sure until we try.”
Jane began to grind into Alex in a circular motion, letting her breasts sway in rhythm with her hips, and she delighted in watching Alex’s eyes follow them intently. Her nipples hardened at the eagerness there and at her lover’s accelerated breathing. Alex began to answer Jane’s movements with tiny thrusts that grew faster and deeper and more insistent. Together they were thrusting and grinding, their bodies pushing and pulling, giving and taking, their timing perfectly matched in an intimate pelvic dance, the wetness of their mutual desire slicking them both.
Alex moaned softly. Warm fingers reached up and lightly traced the hardness of Jane’s achingly taut nipples. Jane answered with her own quiet moans, desire shooting scalding flames up her legs and into her hot center. Just seconds ago, she had been marveling at her raw, sexual power over Alex, but now she, too, was again helpless against that urgent, uncontrollable wanting. It began to consume them both, like an oxygen-fed, raging fire. Immersed in satiating their own, painfully advancing need for release, their friction escalated until orgasm irrevocably freed them. With a final thrust, Jane collapsed into her and they trembled in one another’s arms, both savoring the dying embers of their excitement.
“See,” Alex said between breaths. “I told you, you wouldn’t have any trouble making me come.”
Jane smiled and was grateful her momentary sexual shyness had evaporated so quickly. She was grateful for other things, too. “I think that’s a new record, you stud, you.”
“What?” Alex asked innocently.
“Three orgasms in twenty minutes.” Jane grinned, then showed her appreciation with a quick kiss. “I’ve never known such pleasure before.”
“Maybe we can go for four in twenty-two minutes. What do you say?”
“Oh, no. Not until you catch up to me.” Jane eagerly kissed Alex, anxious to explore her lover’s body with her hands, and especially her mouth.
“Whoa,” Alex said, pulling Jane into an embrace. “We’ve got all night for that, darling.”
“Yeah. We do.” Jane snuggled in closer, exhaustion suddenly overcoming her. This time she welcomed it and was fast asleep within seconds.
Chapter 16
Guiltily, Alex took another sip of brandy. She knew she’d pay for it later with a pounding head, thanks to the remnants of her concussion. But she needed the alcohol’s soothing effects— needed it to help drown out the noise inside the Kincaid house, now full of people, each one monopolizing her. She also needed the alcohol to help flatten the landscape of her thoughts, which dipped and peaked with the sheer magnitude and awe of what her—and Jane’s—life would be like from now on.
Jane Kincaid was the vice president-elect. It was an incredible thought that made Alex’s chest swell with pride. She was so happy and excited for Jane. She wanted her to have everything she wanted—that was without question. But as much as she wanted her lover to be happy, that same all-encompassing love also meant Alex wanted Jane to herself. Just the two of them, enshrouded in their own blissful world. I found her, I made her fall in love with me, she’s mine. It was selfish, Alex knew. Selfish to wish for a mundane life for them, to want to cleave to Jane, to want to shut everything and everyone else out. Even just for a little while.
Fleetingly, Alex couldn’t help but fantasize about a romantic, banal life together—cooking dinner together, planting flowers in their backyard, reading quietly by the fire, making love every night . . . maybe even talk of raising a family some day. Yeah, wouldn’t that be something? There were so many things Alex wanted to do with Jane—things so dull and mundane compared with their life now. But it was useless. This was Jane’s time. Jane was at her best and her brightest. The president needed her. The country needed her, and she was far too talented and ambitious to waste it on a life of playing house with Alex. No. The woman Alex had fallen in love with was capable of conquering the world.
Alex allowed her own private war to rage on. She blinked slowly from her corner of the living room and swallowed another mouthful of brandy, hazily recounting Jack Wilson’s efficient and unemotional advice to her just moments earlier. Jane’s chief of staff had bluntly told her that the vice president would have to work long hours and that there would be days, even weeks, where they wouldn’t see each other. Jane would be appointed to several committees, would have to preside over the Senate at times, would be required to represent the administration on many occasions, both at home and abroad. Jane would not do well to be encumbered by a demanding relationship. She would need Alex’s strength and understanding, and could not afford to take on Alex’s problems or weaknesses. Jane must be unencumbered at home, he warned Alex in his unequivocal, no-nonsense way. Happy and unencumbered, Alex repeated in her mind, like remembering a shopping list. If Jane were unhappy, it would negatively affect her performance, Jack said. And if she were to take her political career one step further someday, then her performance meant everything.
Alex felt solemn and a little adrift. If she were to be nothing more than a favorite little teddy bear of Jane’s to stay on its shelf until it was playtime, well, she didn’t know if she could do that. Surely Jane wouldn’t want her to—
“Hello, Alex.” Clara Stevens smiled carefully at Alex, her eyes quietly probing hers.
“Hello,” Alex responded without much enthusiasm. She didn’t know Clara very well, though Jane certainly had the utmost respect and affection for her. Alex knew she was not being particularly welcoming to a woman who was both a friend and colleague of Jane’s, but she was not in the mood for another lecture—well-intentioned or not.
“Come for a walk with me.” Clara’s voice was light and assured. She slipped her arm tightly through Alex’s with the confidence that her wish would not be denied.
They picked their way around small clusters of people, some in loud, alcohol-fueled conversations, others in hushed tones as they plotted the future. Clara led them to the small, heated sun-room at the back of the house, where tall glass windows adorned with plants allowed them a view of the distant lake that was vast and gray under the matching November skies. They sat down on facing rattan chairs.
“I saw Jack Wilson talking to you earlier.” Clara smiled empathetically. “Let me guess. He was warning you not to be a pain in the ass. To be the perfect wife. To keep everything smooth at home while staying out of the way.”
Alex nodded soberly, still clutching the drink in her hand like a lifeline. “Something like that.”
“And how does that sit with you?”
Alex bristled a little at the woman’s directness. She didn’t owe this stranger her deepest thoughts and feelings, nor did she feel like another round of expert advice, no matter how sweetly it came out. She shrugged noncommittally. “It’s to be expected, I guess.”
Clara looked at her quizzically. “Funny, I hadn’t taken you for a pushover.”
Alex’s annoyance amplified. “Pardon me?”
“You’re not just going to take that, are you?”
Alex was perplexed. Her jaw tightened as she thought how to answer. “I’m not sure I understand.”
Clara laughed a little, rolling her eyes, then leaned forward and clasped Alex’s free hand in both of hers. “Listen, child. I like you. I don’t know you very well, but I like you.”
Alex remained guarded, her hand stiff and cool in Clara’s.
Clara’s smile broadened. Her eyes twinkled. “I know Jane wouldn’t have fallen in love with you if you weren’t a real treasure. She’s a good woman. And she’s very smart. She would not for one minute throw her love away on someone undeserving.”
Alex suddenly felt her body flag in relief, like a bent twig snapping back to its rightful, reposing position. Thank you, Lord. Someone finally remembered that I love Jane. Clara’s words were like a gift, and Alex accepted them with appreciation. She smiled and felt suddenly giddy. “I love Jane very much. I would do anything for her.”
“Including fading into the wallpaper?”
Alex’s smile quickly dissolved. The woman was nothing if not direct. “What exactly are you saying?”
Clara’s hands were very warm and reassuring, and her touch softened her frankness. “Look, child. It’s true Jane needs your support more than anyone else’s over the next four years. It means you need to listen to her, and be there for her, but it also means you must speak your mind. Your support for her must not come at the expense of your own sense of purpose. Do you understand?”
Alex still felt slightly disoriented, her confidence shaky. She eagerly accepted the lifeline Clara seemed to be throwing her. “I think so.”
“A strong woman needs another strong woman . . . and not behind her, but beside her, Alex. Jane needs a partner. Not a child. Not an escort. Not a fan. And not just a friend. Jane needs the woman she fell in love with.” Clara squeezed Alex’s hand tighter. “Love her with everything you have. And forgive her for not giving as much back to you right now as you will be giving to her.”
Alex nodded slowly, Clara’s words like an epiphany. Yes, she told herself resolutely. She could do this. “Well, that’s the best advice I’ve heard in a long time.”
Clara winked again, followed by a slow grin. “Don’t forget to give Jane a kick in the ass when she needs it. And give her some good old-fashioned lovin’ when she needs that, too.”
Alex grinned back, remembering last night’s hours of fabulous lovemaking. They’d slept in between, resuming their lusty activity first thing in the morning. They had not wanted to get out of bed, had not wanted to stop touching each other. “That part won’t be a problem.”
Clara laughed. “I didn’t think so.”
“Aha. There you are, my love.” A petite, middle-aged blond woman swept in and stood behind Clara, her hand resting possessively on her shoulder. She leaned down for a quick kiss, and Alex smiled, pleased that Clara was a dyke—that she knew exactly what she and Jane were going through. There was no question she would be their loyal ally.
“Hi. I’m Sophie.” The woman reached a hand out to shake Alex’s, her smile warm, her touch an unpretentious invitation to friendship. There was a spark in her kind, blue eyes when she needlessly added, “I’m Clara’s other half. And you must be Jane’s?”
Alex nodded, pleased and proud. “I am.”
Sophie squeezed in beside her lover. “She’s a handsome devil,” she whispered animatedly to Clara, as though Alex were not even there.
“Yes. And smart, too,” Clara replied. “And totally in love with our new vice president.”
They both turned boldly appraising gazes to Alex.
“Jane could do a lot worse,” Sophie acknowledged with a slow nod, then broke into a grin. “You don’t mind us giving you the once-over, do you?”
Alex laughed good-naturedly. “Good practice, I’m betting.”
Sophie nodded enthusiastically. “Oh, yeah. You haven’t seen anything yet, woman. You’ll be on the lips of every political wag and every gossiping old hag in Washington for . . . oh, at least three months.”
“Great.” Alex sighed. “I can hardly wait for my fifteen minutes.”
Clara chuckled. “Don’t worry. They’ll get bored with you soon enough.”
“Just ride it out,” Sophie advised. “We’ve all had to do that at one time or another.”
“I’ll remember that,” Alex said dryly, finding solace in her brandy again.
“You’ll be fine, child,” Clara said. “Just remember what I told you.”
“I certainly will. Thank you very much.”
Sophie glanced sidelong at her lover. “Just what sage advice were you imparting, my dear?”
Clara laughed. “Why, the secret to keeping your woman happy, of course.”
“Ahh.” Sophie looked knowingly at Alex and smiled. “Well, Clara is an expert at that.”
The couple kissed, and Alex immediately felt Jane’s absence. She had long ago been swallowed up by the throng of family, friends and colleagues, and while Alex knew she must get used to this instant loneliness, for now she welcomed a little self pity.
“So, Alex,” Sophie said. “With Jane off helping to save the world, what are you going to do?”
The question might have been unkind, coming from a stranger bent on judging her, but Alex felt only a sense of relief at the honesty of the question. Since she and Jane had announced their relationship to the world, no one had asked Alex about her future plans, and it annoyed her. Did they think it didn’t matter to her, now that she’d caught the most eligible woman in the world? Was that to be her life’s crowning moment, “capturing” Jane? Becoming her “wife”? Was she to melt into the background, except to be trotted out on Jane’s arm now and again?
Alex shook her head and felt the gathering of tears just beneath the surface. She hadn’t even discussed her future yet with Jane. There hadn’t really been time, and with the car crash so fresh, Alex feared Jane’s reaction. But she was clear in what she wanted. She wanted to go back to work.
Alex blinked to clear her eyes. She didn’t want to be rude, but she didn’t want to talk about her plans with strangers just now.
“Now, dear,” Clara gently prodded. “Always getting straight to the point, hmm? Alex has had a lot to digest over the last couple of weeks. Perhaps her plans are the furthest thing from her mind right now.”
Alex cleared her throat. “Actually, I just haven’t had a chance to talk to Jane yet.”
“Did I just hear my name?”
Jane entered the room and Alex’s heart skipped a beat, as it always did, at the sight of her.
Alex beamed as Jane approached. Setting her drink down, she reached out for her hand and was pleasantly surprised when Jane threw her arms around her neck and flung herself on Alex’s lap.
“Well,” Alex gushed. “Hello.”
“Hi,” Jane answered breathily. She pressed her lips to Alex’s and kissed her hard, her mouth pushing greedily against Alex’s, before she softened the kiss. The tip of her tongue flicked against Alex’s lips and she kissed her again before pulling back.
“Woo-eee!” Clara and Sophie chimed together.
“That’s some kiss,” Sophie added admiringly.
Jane smiled at Alex, her eyes smoldering with unspent desire. “I miss you, honey.” She touched her forehead to Alex’s.
“I’m right here,” Alex replied softly.
“I know. But I miss you when it’s not just you and me.”
Alex chuckled. Her hand moved to Jane’s knee, then her thigh, and began caressing in small, soft circles. “How quickly can we get rid of everyone?”
Jane flashed an evil smile. “In a flash. I’m the vice president-elect, remember?”
Clara and Sophie stood up.
“Guess that’s our cue,” Sophie mumbled good-naturedly.
“C’mon, darling,” Clara said. “It’s a little hot in here, don’t you think?”
Sophie took Clara’s hand and began leading her out of the room. “Let’s find a little corner somewhere and create our own heat.”
The couple melted away and Jane, whose eyes hadn’t left Alex’s, kissed her gently.
“Are you okay, Alex?”
“Yeah.” Alex nodded. “Especially now that you’re here.”
“I’m sorry I’m not always here when I’m here, you know?”
Alex nodded again. “It’s all right, Jane. Honest. I’m not a child. And I’m not a needy, insecure lover.”
“I know that. But all couples need time together. Even if it’s just a few moments here and there in a busy day.”
Alex smiled lustily. “And then there’s always bedtime.”
Jane threw her head back and laughed, her throat never looking more luscious and inviting than it did now. Alex planted a lingering kiss on the soft flesh near Jane’s collarbone and felt her give a little shiver of enjoyment.
“Mmmm,” Jane answered. “Yes. There’s definitely always bedtime.”
Alex began gently nibbling her earlobe. Her breath ruffled Jane’s silky hair. “I want us to go to bed together every night.”
Jane sighed heavily. “God. I want that too, Alex. More than anything. But there’ll be times when I’m away, and—”
“I know, sweetheart. I want to be with you. Even during those times you’re away.”
“But—”
Alex’s fingers stilled Jane’s lips. “Do you want me with you, Jane?” Alex searched for any signs of hesitation or rejection in Jane’s expression and saw none. “Be honest with me.”
