Vendetta, page 24
‘Ja. The army wanted the whole episode swept under the carpet. Like I told you, I was given a severe reprimand and sent to a different company, but Frank was sent to Greefswald, a base on the border with Botswana, near where Mapungubwe National Park is today.’
Sannie looked puzzled. ‘I never heard of an army base up there.’
‘It was a secret. Greefswald was a terrible place, where the SADF used to send drug users and homosexuals to try to “correct” their behaviour.’ Adam made air quotes with his fingers. ‘Frank’s kit was inspected again after he was charged over the patrol and the military police found some dagga in his footlocker. Frank swore he never used the stuff, but it earned him a second charge and a non-negotiable excuse for the army to send him to that hellhole. While he was locked up there, he wasn’t even able to put together an appeal against the cowardice charge. They would torture the guys there with hard labour, brutal physical training and drill. It broke a lot of men, but Frank survived. He went back to the border – to Angola – but I never saw him again in uniform.’
‘I can see why Frank had an axe to grind with Ferri and why he would have been scarred by what he went through,’ Sannie said. ‘What happened to Evan?’
‘He got a medal, for staying with Ferri and holding some bullshit non-existent line against the Angolans, and when Ferri went back to 44 Parachute Brigade headquarters he took Evan with him. Evan never went back into combat again. He sat out the rest of his service as a clerk.’
‘I see.’
‘Frank played private detective, before his death, checking up on Evan and Ferri without them knowing,’ Adam continued. ‘Ferri sat the bar exam after the army and became a fully fledged lawyer. He ended up with his own practice at quite a young age and a fancy house in the Cape, at Clifton.’
‘Property is expensive there,’ Sannie said.
‘Yes, it is. Ferri didn’t come from money, though. Frank found out that Ferri’s father was an Italian prisoner of war at Zonderwater, near Pretoria, captured by our guys in the western desert during the Second World War. Like a lot of Italians the father decided to move back to South Africa after the war. He ended up running a restaurant in Cullinan, but the family was never rich. Ferri married a fellow law student, but she wasn’t from old money either.’
‘Interesting,’ Sannie said. ‘Maybe he just worked hard. And lawyers make good money.’
‘Sure,’ Adam said. Silence hung between them for a few seconds.
‘What about Luiz?’ Sannie asked.
‘He was with Ferri, Rossouw and Evan, so he most likely saw whatever it was that did happen in the bush that day.’
Sannie thought about that. ‘Yes, but he didn’t end up as a successful lawyer and politician, or a rich businessman. And he wasn’t killed in action. He was a tracker living in staff accommodation at a game lodge, who maybe resorted to poaching to supplement his income.’
‘Poaching?’ Adam looked genuinely shocked. Sannie told him about her conversation with Mia, and the pangolin the young woman had found in his room.
‘Incredible,’ Adam said. ‘But I didn’t know Luiz that well – no one did.’
‘And now, with Tony Ferri about to go for one of the top jobs in politics, maybe Luiz thought he could blackmail him by revealing some long-forgotten secret that Tony wanted to keep buried in the past? Like, maybe, stealing a bag full of diamonds?’
‘Blackmail can also be a powerful motive,’ Sannie said. ‘Do you think Ferri did steal the diamonds, if there were any?’
Adam shrugged. ‘Ferri wasn’t carrying any luggage – we all had our hands full with the dead – but he could have stashed them in his uniform or gear somewhere.’
‘Wasn’t he searched, like you and the others, when you all got back to base?’
‘I don’t know,’ Adam said. ‘Officers look after each other. The orders for our mission came direct from the sector commander, Colonel de Villiers, who took Ferri aside for a private talk before we left. We guessed that the colonel would have been under orders to keep something like the UNITA diamond trade a secret. Frank thought that maybe the two officers cooked up some story for their superiors that the diamonds were missing in action, and that Ferri had the diamonds and he and de Villiers shared them between themselves.’
‘That’s a hell of a conspiracy,’ Sannie said.
Adam shrugged again. ‘Frank could never get any real proof. He told me he tried to reach out to de Villiers but the colonel never replied to him. In any case, it wasn’t likely that de Villiers would incriminate himself.’ Adam was quiet for a moment, then went on, ‘What do you think about the attack on Ferri, in his room?’
Sannie sipped her cocktail. ‘We all know crime is a problem in South Africa, but this is the first I’ve ever heard of someone being assaulted in a luxury lodge like this one. That just doesn’t happen.’
Adam nodded. ‘Maybe it was politically motivated – someone looking for some documents he might have had, or something on his computer?’
‘The DA’s blueprint on how to lose elections?’
Adam laughed. Sannie pondered the attack. Maybe it had just been an opportunistic thief – perhaps a staff member – and Ferri had disturbed them. It was still unlikely, she thought. Julianne Clyde-Smith ran a tight ship at her lodges and Sannie knew that she put a lot of effort into acquiring the best staff, at every level. She paid well and that engendered loyalty.
Adam stood. Sannie admired his well-defined abs and the muscles in his back as he turned around. He dived into the pool. On impulse she stood up, too.
‘How’s the water?’ she asked as Adam surfaced.
‘Bracing. Not as warm as the Indian Ocean.’
She gave a mock shiver.
‘Come on in,’ he said.
The water looked clear and inviting. Adam ran a hand through his short hair, sending droplets flying. She dived in.
‘Brrr. More like freezing.’ She swam a lap to try and warm up. Adam caught up with her, matching her stroke as she turned and did another lap. ‘You look at home in the water.’
He smiled. ‘It’s my natural element. I don’t think I could live in the desert, or even the bush.’
‘I love the beach,’ she said. ‘As a kid I always used to look forward to our annual holiday. We used to go to Margate.’
Adam laughed. ‘Oh, we loved having all you tourists come down to visit every holiday.’
‘I bet you did.’ She splashed him.
‘Haha.’ He swam up to her but stopped short of her.
He was so handsome and, their conversation notwithstanding, Sannie almost felt like she really was on a holiday, with a beautiful stranger in a pool. She trod water, looking at him.
‘You’re shivering,’
‘Just paddling, trying to stay warm,’ she said.
‘You could get out of the water.’
She shook her head. ‘I don’t want to.’
Adam came to her and Sannie’s heart started beating faster. He was tall enough to be able to walk on the bottom of the pool and keep his head above water, whereas she, in the deep end, was just a few centimetres too short.
He spread his arms, under the water.
Sannie locked eyes with him and paddled towards him. She felt like she was approaching the edge of a cliff. When their bodies met, she felt the warmth of him, and imagined she could feel the beat of his heart. He put his arms around her.
Sannie clung to his neck, and they kissed. Adam placed a hand in the small of her back and drew her to him, so their hearts were close. The warmth of his mouth banished the cold and she felt weightless. She had tumbled over the precipice and he had caught her.
‘Wow,’ she said, when they broke for air.
He laughed. ‘You sound like a little girl.’
He held on to her and she did not want to let go. ‘I’m shivering, for real.’
‘I’ve got you.’ Adam held her tight and they kissed again. He moved slowly backwards, into the shallows, until she could stand.
He led her by the hand, out of the pool.
‘What now?’ Sannie asked, her heart still pounding. She busied herself snatching up a towel and drying herself. She picked up the brightly patterned kikoi she had brought with her and tied it around her waist. Adam stood on the other side of her sun bed, opposite her, as he dried himself and shrugged on his T-shirt.
‘I have an idea.’ He smiled.
She had felt him; the cold water had done nothing to hide his desire and she felt the need in her once more. It had been so long.
‘We can take it slow, if you like,’ he said.
She stepped up onto the sun bed, then, as he took an involuntary half-step backwards, she half fell into his arms as she got off the bed.
‘No,’ she whispered in his ear, ‘fast is good.’
Adam took her hand again and led her down the pathway from the pool back to the trail that led to his tent. He paused to look either way, as if someone might be watching them, or waiting for them. She willed him to move on, faster, before common sense intervened and she changed her mind.
Adam sensed the urgency and broke into a half-jog. She laughed, a nervous titter, and kept up with him.
He took the stairs up to his stoep two at a time, then paused and turned at the top, waiting for her.
‘You’re sure?’
She shook her head. ‘No. But I’m coming in.’
Adam opened the sliding door to the suite and Sannie came up the stairs and inside. She melded into his arms once more. They kissed again. She pressed herself against him and undid the loose knot she had tied in her wrap. It fell to the floor. With only the sheer material of her bathing suit between them she felt him again, hard against her. She wanted him, so badly.
Adam picked her up and waltzed her to the bed, then lay her down. She felt light in his strong arms. He straddled her, supporting himself with his arms, and looked down at her. ‘You’re beautiful.’
She blushed. ‘So are you.’
He touched her through the fabric, gently tracing the outline of her as he kissed her. Her body was afire, almost too sensitive to bear the pressure of his fingertips. Sannie hooked an arm around his neck and drew him down, closer. She wanted to feel all of him, on all of her.
Adam kissed his way down her chest and sealed his mouth around a nipple, erect yet still encased in her one-piece. The friction made her gasp. He peeled the shoulder straps down, reverently yet eagerly unwrapping her. He smiled and his eyes glowed. Sannie arched her back as he slid the bathing costume down and off. She couldn’t remember the last time she had felt so open, so vulnerable, yet so certain.
He kissed her.
She ran her fingers through his hair, savouring the feeling and closing her eyes. Impatient, Sannie drew his face back to hers and their lips met again.
‘I want you,’ he said.
‘Me as well.’
His fingers replaced his tongue and she felt herself well up from inside.
How, Sannie wondered, had this happened so quickly? The troubled stranger was gone, replaced by a man who seemed to know every centimetre of her and what to do with her. As she looked into his eyes she felt she should feel guilty, but then he kissed her again and she grabbed him.
Adam opened her, more, then completed her.
She ran a hand over his hard butt, urging him, drawing him in. Sannie started to cry, and felt silly, until he kissed her tears away without a word. She was grateful for his silence. In time, she felt a change in her, and rolled him onto his back. He reached up, his hands covering her breasts as she brushed a strand of blonde hair from her eyes and looked down at him. It was her turn to drink him in, and she revelled in the sight.
He was so perfect, physically, from his hard, spartan lifestyle, yet his eyes were those of a man searching for hope, or redemption, or whatever it was he needed to make him whole again.
Adam opened his mouth to speak, but Sannie put a finger on his lips. He kissed it as she rode him, using the rhythm of their bodies to work away the grief and the uncertainty and the horror she had seen in her life.
This was what she needed, perhaps even who she needed. Someone to care for and someone to hold her. It didn’t matter that he was flawed – they all were. What mattered was that she could feel again.
The afternoon light slanted in, bathing their bodies in liquid gold and the glint of reflection directed her eyes to the mirror on the wall. She saw herself, on him, whole once more.
Chapter 21
Mia lowered her head and said a quiet prayer for Luiz, and her father, and all those veterans who had given their lives, either in battle or since the war.
It had been Tony’s idea for them to observe a minute’s silence during sundowners at the big tree.
When Mia looked up, she saw that Tony was looking at her. He smiled. He had perfect, even white teeth, which she imagined was a prerequisite for a political aspirant these days.
Tony raised his can of Windhoek Lager. ‘To Luiz, and all our comrades.’
‘To Luiz,’ the others said.
Lisa had joined them on this game drive, as had Shirley, at Tony’s suggestion. Evan raised his brandy and Coke and clinked with Tony. ‘He was a good man.’
Tony looked to Mia again. ‘They all were. I’d like to say a few words, if no one minds.’
‘Go right ahead,’ Shirley said. ‘I’m sure Luiz would have appreciated it, especially from someone he served with and who is, well, so important.’
‘Thank you, Shirley. It was my honour to serve with your uncle.’ Tony drew a breath, closed his eyes for a second, then opened them. ‘Luiz was born into a country in conflict, and he died in exile from his homeland of Angola, but he was not alone. He and his San comrades found a home in the old South African Defence Force, and in South Africa itself. As those of us who were there know, the San warriors and their families occupied a special place in our hearts.’
He looked around the small group, briefly making eye contact with each of them. Mia could have been imagining it, but it felt like his gaze lingered on her a second longer than the others. ‘I am a politician, and I must always choose my words carefully, but I hope I am among friends here today, and that I will not be judged unfavourably if I speak my heart. While we, as South Africans, helped men like Luiz, we also failed them. The fact that a military veteran sees no other option in his life other than to end it is a sign, to me, that someone, somewhere, could have done more.’ He held up a hand. ‘I am not talking about his direct family, as they are the ones who men such as Luiz seek to spare from their suffering and grief, by keeping it hidden. It is we, their fellow veterans who know what Luiz went through, and what he was probably still going through. It should have been us who he turned to or, better yet, one of us who called him up and asked how he was, and if there was anything we could do.’
Tony raised a hand again and pinched the bridge of his nose, then continued. ‘I have visited Platfontein and met with the San people there; I have travelled to Angola with veterans’ groups on several occasions to extend the hand of peace and assistance to the veterans and civilian victims of our war there. I have tried to be a good friend to my fellow soldiers’ – he looked to Evan, who gave a small nod – ‘but I have also failed in my duty of care, to others.’
Tony turned to Mia and paused. ‘As we remember Luiz, today, Mia, I especially want to tell you how sorry I am that your father passed in similar circumstances, and was not able, for whatever reason, to reach out to one or more of his former comrades for help. I also apologise for failing him, as his one-time commander, for not making more of an effort to reconcile our differences and to support him when he needed it most.
‘Friends,’ he spread his hands wide to encompass all of them, ‘true leadership is like true friendship; it must be a two-way street, with people talking to each other, not just in good times but in bad, and showing a way forward, together. So, in the Lord’s name, I ask for forgiveness for those of us who have not been there for our brothers and sisters, and for eternal light for those who have found no end to their darkness here on earth.’
Mia felt the tears well up inside her and wiped her eyes. Evan sniffed and Mia could see that Shirley, too, was crying.
‘Thank you, Mr Ferri,’ Shirley said. ‘That was beautiful.’
He went to Shirley, held out his arms, and when she nodded he enfolded her in an embrace. Ferri shook hands with Evan and clapped him on the shoulder, then came to Mia.
As he held her, the dam burst inside her and Mia cried into the politician’s shirt. ‘Thank you,’ she sniffed. ‘I’m sure my father would forgive whatever there was between you two, Tony.’
‘I can only pray,’ he said softly into her ear. He gave her a squeeze and she hugged him back.
Mia straightened and wiped her eyes again. She had a duty to care for these people while they were out in the desert, and needed to keep her wits about her.
‘More drinks, or snacks anyone?’ Mia asked.
‘Sure, may I have a beer, please?’ Evan said.
Mia put on a smile. ‘Coming right up.’
She missed Luiz; at sundowners he would be helping her with drinks and maybe taking a guest or two aside to show them some interesting tracks. He had been quiet, almost withdrawn around her, but he had an easy way about him when he was in the company of guests, despite his limited English. He was adept at making people laugh.
‘What’s on your mind?’ Tony said as he helped himself to another beer from the cooler box.
‘I was just thinking about how funny Luiz could be. He loved to laugh. It just makes it so hard to reconcile what little I knew of him with the way he died, and his past troubles.’
‘We old soldiers become experts at hiding our true feelings. That is, until we meet someone who penetrates our armour.’
He smiled at her. Mia blushed.
