The 45th Parallel, page 30
“She asked both of us.”
“Yes, but my offer is conditionally linked to yours,” he pointed out. “You are the one she wants.”
“But I want you,” I whispered, recalling his words in Illy’s office.
Gio gripped my hand and steered me down the hall and through various pods. I recognized where we were headed.
“Do you have a booking?” I asked softly.
“No, but I thought we might see if we could sneak in. It is working hours. Besides, no one here would deny you anything.”
I wanted to argue but knew this was likely true. It was becoming embarrassing. Since I had come out of the apartment, people moved to let me to the front of the lines for meals. Every time one of us opened the apartment door, we would find gifts piled high. People were thankful for what we had done. The problem was, I would always have done it, and I was still wracked with guilt for not saving them all.
“When do you think it will return to normal?” I had asked Gio that morning as yet another bottle of wine was left on our doorstep with a note, and I had nearly fallen over it.
“A very long time,” he admitted. “People will remember you and what you did for generations.”
One of the three rooms was available, and Gio rapidly booked a two-hour window.
“I thought you said an hour was the maximum capacity?”
“I booked it in your name, see?” He showed me the screen. “No one will question you.”
“You can’t do that! People will think I am taking advantage of the situation.”
“We need somewhere quiet to talk,” he said as he pushed me inside and bolted the door. Before I had a chance to speak, he had lifted me against the door and kissed me. My arms found their place around his neck, and my legs wrapped around his waist. My stomach lurched as his lips demanded mine, seeking. His teeth held my lower lip, teasing. I was in no mood to object and let him control me.
“Something is wrong?” he murmured as he slid the merlot grape-leather skirt over my hips and onto the floor. “Normally, you are more … feisty.”
I moaned as his lips reached my breasts, and he took my nipple into his mouth. I exhaled and wilted as his hips pressed into mine, urgent.
“What is it?”
“Nothing,” I murmured, not wanting him to stop.
He pulled away, and I dropped to the floor, my legs almost not making it. He steadied me. “Speak.”
“It is nothing.”
“Do not lie to me, Caitlin. We promised—no lies. Speak.”
“That night the raiders came,” I whispered. “Sera and I would have left. We wanted to ask you to come with us, but we thought you didn’t want us when you left us alone. But then things happened, and I never got to ask you.”
“Ask me what?”
“Would you have come with me? I don’t think I can spend my life underwater, Gio. I love you. Like I have loved no one in my life, I love you. I meant what I said to Mum. You complete me; it is like a puzzle piece was always missing, but now I am whole. But I can’t stay here. I feel trapped, not by you, but by this place. Grass, trees, and fresh air are what I need. I need to run, climb mountains.”
Gio studied me in the dim light, shadows flickering over his handsome face.
“That night, I knew I loved you, and I told Matt. But I admit, then, I thought of us staying here, together. You seemed to like it here. Matt and I even discussed trying to get the apartment next door so that we could have our privacy but still be close to Matt and Sera. I hadn’t said it aloud until I told him, but when he told me how he felt about Seraphine, I knew I felt the same about you. Then, when I saw you march out in the Caspian’s clothing and take charge, I couldn’t believe it was you. I watched, mesmerized, as you strutted around like you belonged there. A leader. You collected weapons and saved us. When I learned you had poisoned them to save us, I didn’t think I could possibly love you more. Then, when I finished removing Carmelo’s spleen, I thought I would come home and tell you how much I loved you. Instead, I saw you struggle with the lives you took, and my heart expanded even more. That you had sympathy for those monsters after everything they did astounded me, and that was the moment.”
“Moment?”
“When I knew you were the one. I can’t imagine my life without you in it. Where you go, I go.”
“But your life is here,” I whispered into his neck.
Gio shrugged and pulled back. “What do I have here? My brother, but he is happy with your sister. Carmelo, but I suspect he will soon also be happy.”
My mouth dropped. “Do you mean…?”
“Your mother. Yes. Illyria has already made her intentions clear.”
“It has been three days!”
“And he has accepted.”
“Accepted what?”
“He will return to Scotland with her. She asked, and he said yes.”
I couldn’t believe my ears. “Illy? Carmelo?”
“The attraction was instant, like ours. From the moment I saw you, I knew you were the one.” He kissed my forehead. “So, all that is left here is Francesca. I can ask her if you like… what she thinks…”
“No,” I retorted, but relaxed. “Really? You would come with me?”
“I would follow you to the ends of the earth. Canada is close enough. My mother once told me that when you meet the right person, all the stars fall into alignment, like a constellation that was always meant to be. You take a breath and feel like it is a complete breath for the first time in your life. All the ones before were half breaths, but you didn’t even know it. You feel complete, like a whole person, in a way you have never felt before.”
“That’s it,” I whispered. “That is how I feel.”
“As do I. So, why would I not come with you?”
“I don’t know if I want to go,” I admitted. “I want to be with you, but Canada? Sera and I planned to go to Australia before all this happened.”
“We still could, but if you don’t mind, before we go anywhere, I would love to come to Scotland with you. Meet your family, your parents, and your siblings. See your home.”
I blinked. “Truly? You would do that, for me?”
“When will you work out I would do anything for you? I am alive because of you.”
“You don’t know that,” I scoffed, feeling uncomfortable.
“Actually, I do. They retrieved the list. I guess the Caspians did not need more doctors.”
I gaped at him. “Really? Who told you that?”
“Leonardo. He retrieved the list, and I asked. I needed to know. But I was marked for execution.”
I was speechless. “How many?” I finally croaked. “How many would have lived?”
“A little under three hundred.”
“From five thousand?” I was incredulous.
“Five thousand, one hundred and sixty-two. Not including you. They didn’t know about you. They needed technical specialists who knew how to operate our systems, but that was all. Matteo was the one who would live. He had skills they desired. They had planned to bring their residents through on the next full moon. We would all have been gone by then.”
“How does that make you feel?”
Gio snorted. “Happy for him, I guess. But so very grateful to you. I know for a fact that I live because of you. You could ask me to travel to the moon, and I would accompany you.”
My feelings must have shown on my face as he gripped my arms. “What?”
“So, is this gratitude or love?” I squeaked, scared of the answer but jutting my chin, ready for the reply. “You promised me you would always tell me the truth.”
I closed my eyes and braced for the answer. Silence filled the cavern. A single tear leaked from the corner of my eye before I could blink it away. His finger traced it down my cheek. My feet were swept out from under me, and I felt myself being carried curled against his chest. He was so firm and warm. I wanted to stay like this for eternity, protected, but still needed an answer.
“Tell me,” I whispered as I felt the hot water rise around us.
His powerful arms lifted me above his head and slid me down his torso until his mouth reached mine. My legs instinctively wrapped around his waist.
“I will love you until my dying breath,” he whispered against my lips. “I love you. As long as we are together, I will go anywhere with you. But I have one request.”
Slowly, I opened my eyes and stared into his.
“What?”
“I want you, all of you. I want you to marry me, and I want a family. I want it all, Caitlin. The amazing wife, children. I want to father every single one of your children. To be part of an extended family, the one I never had. I want to see the world and you by my side.”
“Maybe you will be by my side,” I responded cheekily as he laid me back over the steaming water, holding my hips against his.
“That is entirely acceptable.”
Book Club Questions
1. Mental health is a theme that runs throughout the Antipodes series. What challenges would you face living in a domed or underwater community?
2. Community is an integral part of life in Lewis and Piedmont (Italy). What does community mean to you?
3. Family are those people who take you in when you have nowhere else to go. How true is this in The 45th Parallel? Which character resonates with you the most? Why?
4. The 45th Parallel describes numerous scientific concepts, including antipodes, sustainable living, algal photobioreactors, aquaponics, and geothermal engineering. What did you learn that surprised you?
5. Caitlin and Seraphine are “chosen ones,” genetically modified to be immune to the protozoa that destroyed life outside of the communities. Do they have an obligation greater than others to ensure the survival of their people?
6. Giovanni describes “The Ultimate Step” and the ceremony of farewell to Cait. What three things would you tell one of your loved ones seeking to depart this life?
7. Throughout the Antipodes series, the characters travel across the world and experience different cultures and traditions. Where would you most like to visit and why?
8. One of Caitlin’s legacies is to make biomechanical aids for Gianni, the boy with muscular dystrophy. What would you like to be your legacy?
9. Equality is a key theme in this book. Men and women both hold leadership roles. Same-sex relationships are normalized. Where would you like to see more equality in your real life?
10. When Sera and Cait finally admit who they are to Gio and Matt, there is a time when they feel they are being punished for the actions of their mothers. Is there ever a situation where the sins of the father should be remedied by subsequent generations?
Author Bio
T.S. Simons is an Australian-based author of Scottish heritage. Living in the alpine region of Australia, she believes in the values of sustainability and community in a world where we place greater value on possessions than people. She enjoys posing philosophical questions that make readers think and reflect on the world we live in. The Antipodes series addresses the question—if we gave young people the opportunity to start over, would we replicate the mistakes of the past?
Her desire to assist others saw her working in international development before realizing that her passion lay in education. She holds Bachelor and Masters degrees from Monash University, is a graduate of the Australian Institute of Company Directors, and enjoys reading, travelling, mythology, snow skiing, and attempting to live as sustainably as possible. She is owned by two, rather bossy, standard schnauzers and two rescue cats who co-manage her household. She has plans to add alpacas to the list.
The main Antipodes series comprises Antipodes, The Liminal Space, Ouroboros, Caim, and Sessrumnir. The Antipodes (45th Parallel) series extends on the original Antipodes series and comprises The 45th Parallel, Orenda, and Bifrost. After she finally gets some sleep, she is planning to continue this series.
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T. S. Simons, The 45th Parallel
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“Yes, but my offer is conditionally linked to yours,” he pointed out. “You are the one she wants.”
“But I want you,” I whispered, recalling his words in Illy’s office.
Gio gripped my hand and steered me down the hall and through various pods. I recognized where we were headed.
“Do you have a booking?” I asked softly.
“No, but I thought we might see if we could sneak in. It is working hours. Besides, no one here would deny you anything.”
I wanted to argue but knew this was likely true. It was becoming embarrassing. Since I had come out of the apartment, people moved to let me to the front of the lines for meals. Every time one of us opened the apartment door, we would find gifts piled high. People were thankful for what we had done. The problem was, I would always have done it, and I was still wracked with guilt for not saving them all.
“When do you think it will return to normal?” I had asked Gio that morning as yet another bottle of wine was left on our doorstep with a note, and I had nearly fallen over it.
“A very long time,” he admitted. “People will remember you and what you did for generations.”
One of the three rooms was available, and Gio rapidly booked a two-hour window.
“I thought you said an hour was the maximum capacity?”
“I booked it in your name, see?” He showed me the screen. “No one will question you.”
“You can’t do that! People will think I am taking advantage of the situation.”
“We need somewhere quiet to talk,” he said as he pushed me inside and bolted the door. Before I had a chance to speak, he had lifted me against the door and kissed me. My arms found their place around his neck, and my legs wrapped around his waist. My stomach lurched as his lips demanded mine, seeking. His teeth held my lower lip, teasing. I was in no mood to object and let him control me.
“Something is wrong?” he murmured as he slid the merlot grape-leather skirt over my hips and onto the floor. “Normally, you are more … feisty.”
I moaned as his lips reached my breasts, and he took my nipple into his mouth. I exhaled and wilted as his hips pressed into mine, urgent.
“What is it?”
“Nothing,” I murmured, not wanting him to stop.
He pulled away, and I dropped to the floor, my legs almost not making it. He steadied me. “Speak.”
“It is nothing.”
“Do not lie to me, Caitlin. We promised—no lies. Speak.”
“That night the raiders came,” I whispered. “Sera and I would have left. We wanted to ask you to come with us, but we thought you didn’t want us when you left us alone. But then things happened, and I never got to ask you.”
“Ask me what?”
“Would you have come with me? I don’t think I can spend my life underwater, Gio. I love you. Like I have loved no one in my life, I love you. I meant what I said to Mum. You complete me; it is like a puzzle piece was always missing, but now I am whole. But I can’t stay here. I feel trapped, not by you, but by this place. Grass, trees, and fresh air are what I need. I need to run, climb mountains.”
Gio studied me in the dim light, shadows flickering over his handsome face.
“That night, I knew I loved you, and I told Matt. But I admit, then, I thought of us staying here, together. You seemed to like it here. Matt and I even discussed trying to get the apartment next door so that we could have our privacy but still be close to Matt and Sera. I hadn’t said it aloud until I told him, but when he told me how he felt about Seraphine, I knew I felt the same about you. Then, when I saw you march out in the Caspian’s clothing and take charge, I couldn’t believe it was you. I watched, mesmerized, as you strutted around like you belonged there. A leader. You collected weapons and saved us. When I learned you had poisoned them to save us, I didn’t think I could possibly love you more. Then, when I finished removing Carmelo’s spleen, I thought I would come home and tell you how much I loved you. Instead, I saw you struggle with the lives you took, and my heart expanded even more. That you had sympathy for those monsters after everything they did astounded me, and that was the moment.”
“Moment?”
“When I knew you were the one. I can’t imagine my life without you in it. Where you go, I go.”
“But your life is here,” I whispered into his neck.
Gio shrugged and pulled back. “What do I have here? My brother, but he is happy with your sister. Carmelo, but I suspect he will soon also be happy.”
My mouth dropped. “Do you mean…?”
“Your mother. Yes. Illyria has already made her intentions clear.”
“It has been three days!”
“And he has accepted.”
“Accepted what?”
“He will return to Scotland with her. She asked, and he said yes.”
I couldn’t believe my ears. “Illy? Carmelo?”
“The attraction was instant, like ours. From the moment I saw you, I knew you were the one.” He kissed my forehead. “So, all that is left here is Francesca. I can ask her if you like… what she thinks…”
“No,” I retorted, but relaxed. “Really? You would come with me?”
“I would follow you to the ends of the earth. Canada is close enough. My mother once told me that when you meet the right person, all the stars fall into alignment, like a constellation that was always meant to be. You take a breath and feel like it is a complete breath for the first time in your life. All the ones before were half breaths, but you didn’t even know it. You feel complete, like a whole person, in a way you have never felt before.”
“That’s it,” I whispered. “That is how I feel.”
“As do I. So, why would I not come with you?”
“I don’t know if I want to go,” I admitted. “I want to be with you, but Canada? Sera and I planned to go to Australia before all this happened.”
“We still could, but if you don’t mind, before we go anywhere, I would love to come to Scotland with you. Meet your family, your parents, and your siblings. See your home.”
I blinked. “Truly? You would do that, for me?”
“When will you work out I would do anything for you? I am alive because of you.”
“You don’t know that,” I scoffed, feeling uncomfortable.
“Actually, I do. They retrieved the list. I guess the Caspians did not need more doctors.”
I gaped at him. “Really? Who told you that?”
“Leonardo. He retrieved the list, and I asked. I needed to know. But I was marked for execution.”
I was speechless. “How many?” I finally croaked. “How many would have lived?”
“A little under three hundred.”
“From five thousand?” I was incredulous.
“Five thousand, one hundred and sixty-two. Not including you. They didn’t know about you. They needed technical specialists who knew how to operate our systems, but that was all. Matteo was the one who would live. He had skills they desired. They had planned to bring their residents through on the next full moon. We would all have been gone by then.”
“How does that make you feel?”
Gio snorted. “Happy for him, I guess. But so very grateful to you. I know for a fact that I live because of you. You could ask me to travel to the moon, and I would accompany you.”
My feelings must have shown on my face as he gripped my arms. “What?”
“So, is this gratitude or love?” I squeaked, scared of the answer but jutting my chin, ready for the reply. “You promised me you would always tell me the truth.”
I closed my eyes and braced for the answer. Silence filled the cavern. A single tear leaked from the corner of my eye before I could blink it away. His finger traced it down my cheek. My feet were swept out from under me, and I felt myself being carried curled against his chest. He was so firm and warm. I wanted to stay like this for eternity, protected, but still needed an answer.
“Tell me,” I whispered as I felt the hot water rise around us.
His powerful arms lifted me above his head and slid me down his torso until his mouth reached mine. My legs instinctively wrapped around his waist.
“I will love you until my dying breath,” he whispered against my lips. “I love you. As long as we are together, I will go anywhere with you. But I have one request.”
Slowly, I opened my eyes and stared into his.
“What?”
“I want you, all of you. I want you to marry me, and I want a family. I want it all, Caitlin. The amazing wife, children. I want to father every single one of your children. To be part of an extended family, the one I never had. I want to see the world and you by my side.”
“Maybe you will be by my side,” I responded cheekily as he laid me back over the steaming water, holding my hips against his.
“That is entirely acceptable.”
Book Club Questions
1. Mental health is a theme that runs throughout the Antipodes series. What challenges would you face living in a domed or underwater community?
2. Community is an integral part of life in Lewis and Piedmont (Italy). What does community mean to you?
3. Family are those people who take you in when you have nowhere else to go. How true is this in The 45th Parallel? Which character resonates with you the most? Why?
4. The 45th Parallel describes numerous scientific concepts, including antipodes, sustainable living, algal photobioreactors, aquaponics, and geothermal engineering. What did you learn that surprised you?
5. Caitlin and Seraphine are “chosen ones,” genetically modified to be immune to the protozoa that destroyed life outside of the communities. Do they have an obligation greater than others to ensure the survival of their people?
6. Giovanni describes “The Ultimate Step” and the ceremony of farewell to Cait. What three things would you tell one of your loved ones seeking to depart this life?
7. Throughout the Antipodes series, the characters travel across the world and experience different cultures and traditions. Where would you most like to visit and why?
8. One of Caitlin’s legacies is to make biomechanical aids for Gianni, the boy with muscular dystrophy. What would you like to be your legacy?
9. Equality is a key theme in this book. Men and women both hold leadership roles. Same-sex relationships are normalized. Where would you like to see more equality in your real life?
10. When Sera and Cait finally admit who they are to Gio and Matt, there is a time when they feel they are being punished for the actions of their mothers. Is there ever a situation where the sins of the father should be remedied by subsequent generations?
Author Bio
T.S. Simons is an Australian-based author of Scottish heritage. Living in the alpine region of Australia, she believes in the values of sustainability and community in a world where we place greater value on possessions than people. She enjoys posing philosophical questions that make readers think and reflect on the world we live in. The Antipodes series addresses the question—if we gave young people the opportunity to start over, would we replicate the mistakes of the past?
Her desire to assist others saw her working in international development before realizing that her passion lay in education. She holds Bachelor and Masters degrees from Monash University, is a graduate of the Australian Institute of Company Directors, and enjoys reading, travelling, mythology, snow skiing, and attempting to live as sustainably as possible. She is owned by two, rather bossy, standard schnauzers and two rescue cats who co-manage her household. She has plans to add alpacas to the list.
The main Antipodes series comprises Antipodes, The Liminal Space, Ouroboros, Caim, and Sessrumnir. The Antipodes (45th Parallel) series extends on the original Antipodes series and comprises The 45th Parallel, Orenda, and Bifrost. After she finally gets some sleep, she is planning to continue this series.
More books from
4 Horsemen Publications
Fantasy, SciFi, & Paranormal Romance
Amanda Fasciano
Waking Up Dead
Dead Vessel
Beau Lake
The Beast Beside Me
The Beast Within Me
Taming the Beast: Novella
The Beast After Me
Charming the Beast: Novella
The Beast Like Me
An Eye for Emeralds
Swimming in Sapphires
Pining for Pearls
Chelsea Burton Dunn
By Moonlight
Danielle Orsino
Locked Out of Heaven
Thine Eyes of Mercy
From the Ashes
Kingdom Come
Fire, Ice, Acid, & Heart
A Fae is Done
J.M. Paquette
Klauden’s Ring
Solyn’s Body
The Inbetween
Hannah’s Heart
Call Me Forth
Invite Me In
Keep Me Close
Jessica Salina
Not My Time
Kait Disney-Leugers
Antique Magic
Lyra R. Saenz
Prelude
Falsetto in the Woods: Novella
Ragtime Swing
Sonata
Song of the Sea
The Devil’s Trill
Bercuese
To Heal a Songbird
Ghost March
Nocturne
Paige Lavoie
I’m in Love with Mothman
Robert J. Lewis
Shadow Guardian and the Three Bears
T.S. Simons
Antipodes
The Liminal Space
Ouroboros
Caim
Sessrúmnir
The 45th Parallel
Valerie Willis
Cedric: The Demonic Knight
Romasanta: Father of Werewolves
The Oracle: Keeper of the Gaea’s Gate
Artemis: Eye of Gaea
King Incubus: A New Reign
V.C. Willis
The Prince’s Priest
The Priest’s Assassin
The Assassin’s Saint
Discover more at
4HorsemenPublications.com
T. S. Simons, The 45th Parallel
