Second Chances in Tuppenny Bridge: A totally heartwarming feel-good read, page 21
‘You okay?’ she asked, looking puzzled.
‘Fine. Just lost my balance for a moment.’ He shrugged. ‘Must be getting old. I’ll see you soon.’
With that, he strode away as fast as possible without actually breaking into a jog. Where had all these feelings for Kat come from? Why now?
This, he reflected with rising panic, was getting serious. Something was going to have to be done about it.
Summer and Clemmie joined Kat and the children as she wandered towards the sheep pens, keen to watch the Jacobs being judged.
‘No Dolly?’ Kat asked as they walked beside the buggy towards Little Market Place where the judging was taking place.
Being Sunday, The Corner Cottage Bookshop was closed for the day, so she’d assumed Dolly would be attending the fair.
Clemmie, a pretty twenty-six-year-old with fair hair and blue eyes, wrinkled her nose. ‘Edits,’ she said briefly.
Dolly Bennet was an author of wartime sagas, as well as owning the bookshop, and Kat knew all too well that her writing schedule took priority over everything else. It possibly explained why Dolly wasn’t married or seeing anyone, although according to her she had no time for all that romantic tosh and saved it instead for her fictional characters.
‘What a shame. It’s been a great fair so far,’ she said. ‘What a pity she’s had to miss out.’
Clemmie laughed. ‘Well, sheep aren’t really Dolly’s thing anyway. She’s not that bothered. To be fair, I feel pretty much the same. We’ve enjoyed the races and the duck trials and browsing the stalls, but I can take or leave the sheep.’
‘Not that you can miss them,’ Summer added, glancing around the market place which was jammed with pens full of various breeds of sheep. The sound of bleating filled the air, and a loudspeaker announced the various classes at regular intervals, so Kat had to agree with Summer’s statement. Whatever else was going on, this event was definitely about the sheep first and foremost.
‘Are you going to watch the judging?’ she asked doubtfully, wondering where else they would be going in this direction.
‘Nope. We’re off to the Lusty Tup Brewery on a tour,’ Summer told her. ‘I’ve heard loads about it, but I’ve never been. There’s a bus running from Station Road in five minutes for the next tour, so Clemmie offered to go with me. Ben’s not keen, but he’s too busy checking over the animals and judging anyway. Even if he wasn’t I don’t think he’d come. He’s a bit funny about Lusty Tup, what with his brother and everything.’ She went pink suddenly. ‘Oh! Sorry, Kat. I didn’t think.’
‘It’s okay.’ Kat gave her a reassuring smile. ‘It was a long time ago.’
Although she felt pretty much the same as Ben. The brewery was the last place she felt like visiting.
‘We’d better hurry if we’re going to catch the bus,’ Clemmie said.
Summer nodded. ‘See you later, Kat.’
‘Have a good time,’ Kat called after them, as the two girls hurried away. ‘Don’t sample too many of the freebies!’
She saw the pen of Jacob sheep and nudged Tommy. ‘Look! Those are my favourites. Aren’t they lovely?’
The Jacobs were, she thought, a joy to behold. With dense, piebald fleeces and impressive horns they looked more like goats than sheep. Some of them had brown patches while others had black, and most of them had four horns, although some had two. They were known for being sharp-witted and alert and didn’t have the more docile expressions seen on some of the other breeds of sheep.
Tommy agreed that the Jacobs were beautiful, although he wasn’t so keen on the horns, and it was clear he’d preferred the hornless Herdwicks and Suffolks yesterday.
Right now, the Rough Fells were being judged, and Kat wheeled the buggy closer to the trailer outside the Town Hall, where the top three were being examined to decide which prize they’d be awarded.
‘I’m glad I bumped into you,’ said a voice beside her, and she spun round, wrinkling her nose as she fought to remember the name of the young woman who’d come to view the shop, but whose brother hadn’t bothered to turn up.
‘Are you? Why’s that?’ Daisy! That was it. Relieved, Kat smiled at her. ‘Don’t tell me your brother’s changed his mind?’
‘He says we can book another viewing,’ Daisy revealed. ‘If that’s okay.’ She looked anxious. ‘You haven’t sold it yet, have you?’
‘Not yet,’ Kat replied, deciding not to add that they hadn’t even come close. ‘When were you thinking?’
‘Wednesday evening?’ Daisy suggested. ‘Do you think it could be just us? No estate agent, I mean. He might get pushy, and I don’t want to scare them off. Tom’s girlfriend’s coming with us too.’ She didn’t sound too keen on the idea. ‘I’m sorry we messed you about last time. Tom’s been living in a city for a long time, and he’s a bit reluctant to move back to the Dales. It’s his girlfriend who’s keener, although she’s never lived in the country before. She’s got this fantasy I suppose. She watches too many rural property programmes. To be honest, I don’t care if she loves it or hates it once she gets here, as long as she persuades Tom to buy the shop. I’ll worry about what happens later after we’ve bought it.’
‘You really want it then?’ Kat asked doubtfully.
‘I really do,’ Daisy admitted. ‘I’m sick of living in the city and now Dad’s gone there’s nothing to keep me there. We’re from Upper Skimmerdale originally, you see. Dad had a sheep farm up there. I’m a country girl at heart. Couldn’t resist the sheep fair, and I…’
She broke off, staring at the trailer where the judging of the rough fells was in its final stages, transfixed.
‘He only used to breed Swaledales.’
‘Sorry?’
‘Ignore me. I was thinking out loud.’ Daisy nodded towards the trailer. ‘See the farmer with the sheep on the right? I know him. Well,’ she gave a bitter laugh. ‘I used to know him.’
Kat saw a tall man with dark, curly hair and a face that reminded her of Aidan Turner.
‘Oh? You don’t see him any longer?’
‘We were neighbours,’ Daisy said, her voice suddenly brittle. ‘He’s a sheep farmer too. I used to help him out with the children after his wife died.’
Kat glanced uncomfortably at Tommy. ‘Right. So you’re friends then?’
Daisy wrapped her arms around herself. ‘We were. I thought—I thought we were more than that. I used to cook for him, see to the kids, do the washing, get them to school. Well, as much as I could. I had a job, and the farm, and my dad to see to, but…’ She sighed. ‘Anyway, it turned out I was just a helpful neighbour in his eyes. Someone new and prettier came along and that was that.’
‘Oh.’ Kat felt subdued. ‘I’m sorry.’ She felt it best not to say anything else, as it was clearly a sore subject. To her surprise, though, Daisy seemed keen to continue. It was as if a torrent of hurt was pouring forth.
‘It was my own fault. I let myself be pushed into the friend zone, and it’s always a mistake. Plus I was too bloody helpful. I made it easy for him. When someone came along who challenged him a bit he was a pushover. They’re married now,’ she added. ‘I don’t think she’s here though. No doubt she’d be hanging off his arm if she was.’
‘How long ago was this?’ Kat asked, sensing that Daisy was still hurting.
‘Oh, about six, seven years.’
Crikey! And she still hadn’t moved on, clearly. Kat gripped the handles of the buggy as Daisy turned to her and she saw tears in the woman’s eyes.
‘I left it too late,’ she said flatly. ‘I should have told him how I felt, but I kept putting it off. In the end he’d stopped noticing me. I was just there. I shouldn’t have let us get so comfortable.’ She nodded at the trailer. ‘He’s won, look. Thought he would.’
Kat watched as the judges shook the farmer’s hand. He was rather good looking, she thought. She could understand Daisy falling for him. What a shame he’d only seen her as the help…
Daisy’s face reddened suddenly, and there was a hint of panic in her voice as she said, ‘He’s seen me! I’ve got to go. I’ll see you later, Kat.’
She hurried off, melting into the crowd, and Kat saw the farmer scanning the hordes of people as if looking for her. She had a feeling that, if he went looking, he wouldn’t find her. Daisy clearly didn’t want to bump into him again, even though she’d obviously been besotted with him at one time. Probably, she thought sadly, she still was.
She turned the buggy around and took Tommy’s hand, leading him away from the crowd. Her interest in watching the Jacobs being judged had waned, and she thought it might be time to take the children home instead.
Daisy had given her food for thought. Like Kat, she’d stepped in to help with the children when this man had lost his wife, and like Kat she’d fallen for the bereaved father. But she hadn’t told him how she felt, and her chance had passed when he’d met someone else—someone he didn’t see as simply a kind friend who’d helped him out, but someone new and exciting. Someone he could fall in love with.
What if that happened to her and Jonah? What if Jonah met someone else who he talked to about other things, rather than whether Tommy’s school uniform needed washing, or if they’d run out of peanut butter for his packed lunch?
Frowning, she headed towards Forge Lane. She’d been the one who’d insisted that she was simply staying at the cottage as a glorified babysitter. That she and Jonah were just friends. But if she repeated that often enough it might be something Jonah himself could never get past. The more she reinforced it, the greater the chance that he would never be able to see her as anything other than the hired help.
She’d thought she had time. Plenty of time. She’d thought her feelings towards Jonah were something she could bury. Pretend it wasn’t happening. There was always tomorrow after all.
But what if he met someone this very afternoon? What if someone stopped by his stall and admired his work and they got talking? What about the young woman who’d lent him the cob to do his shoeing demonstration with yesterday? It could, she realised with increasing alarm, happen any time.
She didn’t want what had happened to Daisy to happen to her.
She had to tell him how she felt. He might be horrified. He might tell her that he didn’t feel the same way and never would. But at least then she’d know she’d tried; that she didn’t have to live with the same regrets Daisy had.
Whatever the outcome, it was now or never.
EIGHTEEN
Jonah had expected Kat to turn up at the stall at some point during the day, so when she didn’t, his heart sank. He told himself she had enough on her hands with the children, and anyway, why would she want to stand and talk to him when she could see him any day of the week, and probably had far better things to do with her time?
He imagined her in the market place, laughing and chatting with their friends and neighbours. Maybe Ross Lavender had sidled up to her and she was talking to him? He wasn’t sure why that thought had popped into his head, but he wished it hadn’t.
Nina, he was sure, was already yesterday’s news, and Kat was an attractive woman. Okay, she was seven or eight years older than Ross, but what was that in the scheme of things? He’d bet Ross had dated women a lot older than that. They’d seemed to get on well yesterday when they were talking at the stall and…
He shook his head. What the hell was wrong with him? He was acting like some daft bloody kid!
Hattie and Tommy had already had a long day at the sheep fair yesterday and expecting them to cope with another full day was probably unfair. Kat had no doubt taken them home because they’d had enough. He needed his head read if he thought it was anything more than that.
As the field beyond the churchyard emptied, he drove the van close to the stall and began to load what was left into it. He was pleased there was very little to take back. He’d sold most of the artwork and had made a tidy profit, far beyond his expectations.
Thanks to Kat persuading him to up the prices. She had more faith in him than he had in himself.
There she was, in his head again. She seemed to live there almost permanently these days. He closed the van doors and leaned against them, wondering what the hell he was going to do about it.
This, he thought wretchedly, was the last thing he needed. He blamed Noah for putting the idea into his head in the first place. He would never have seen Kat as anything but a friend if not for him and his stupid comments.
An image flashed into his mind. The Market Café. Baby vomit dribbling down his jacket. Kat dabbing at his chest with paper napkins. Her gaze lifting to meet his. The way his heart had pounded most unexpectedly…
Had it happened then? He’d dismissed the way his body had reacted and told himself it meant nothing, and somehow he’d convinced himself it was true until Noah opened the whole can of worms again. Maybe he couldn’t blame his friend for his feelings after all. But it didn’t matter whose fault it was anyway.
What mattered was what, if anything, he was going to do about it.
A warm glow crept through him as he remembered her reaction yesterday when they’d got home. She’d been full of praise for him—delighted he’d sold so many items on the stall—chatting excitedly about how clever he was with horses, and how amazing it had been, watching him shoe the cob, and how brilliant he was at his job.
It occurred to him that she’d seemed proud of him, which made him proud of himself. She’d also made him feel good about himself, and it had been a long time since he’d felt that way.
He ran a hand through his hair and groaned. He had to tell her how he felt. There was no running away from this, not any longer.
But what about Leon?
The thought stopped him in his tracks. Leon had been his best friend, and he’d loved Kat so much. How would he feel if Jonah made a move on her?
Another thought occurred to him, and he tried to quell the queasiness in his stomach. How would Kat feel if the best friend of her one true love told her he was in love with her? What if she was disgusted with him?
But it had been fourteen years. He closed his eyes briefly as he realised that, actually, it would be exactly fourteen years a week from today. October the eighth. A day never to be forgotten.
Would it be tactless and appalling if he even broached the subject so close to the anniversary?
Of course it would! What the hell was he thinking?
Jonah muttered a curse and climbed into the van, slamming the door shut.
If he wanted to drive Kat away for good, now would be the perfect time to tell her that he loved her. Idiot. He was going to have to keep a lid on his feelings for now. There was nothing else for it.
He was about to drive up Forge Lane but changed his mind. He’d leave the van in the car park of The White Hart Inn tonight. He needed a drink.
Kat had spent the afternoon preparing a hearty chicken casserole for tea, thinking it would be nice to have a family meal around the table. By six o’clock, however, she’d had to admit defeat, and gave Tommy and Hattie theirs, then bathed them, and got them both into clean pyjamas.
By seven, Hattie was fast asleep in her cot, and by eight— knowing he had to be up for school tomorrow—Kat had tucked Tommy into bed and read him a story, assuring him that Daddy was absolutely fine and was just busy putting away the stall, and that he’d see him tomorrow at breakfast.
She went downstairs and stacked the dirty crockery and cutlery in the dishwasher, eyeing the casserole dubiously, hoping she wouldn’t have to keep it warm for much longer.
She cleared away Hattie’s things and double-checked Tommy’s school uniform was ready for tomorrow. Then she checked she had everything for his packed lunch, even though she already knew she had.
With the house clean and tidy, the children asleep, and the tea ready to go, Kat sank onto the sofa and gazed unseeingly at the television, wondering where on earth Jonah had got to. It couldn’t take him this long to load up his van.
Her mobile rang and she grabbed it, feeling guilty at her disappointment that it was Sally’s name flashing on the screen, rather than Jonah’s.
‘Hiya, Sal. How’s it going?’
‘Hiya, love. Just thought I’d ring you and give you a head’s up that Jonah’s here.’
‘Here? You mean the pub?’
‘I do. And I’ve got to tell you he’s standing at the bar, staring into a pint of beer, and looking like he’s got the weight of the world on his shoulders. Rafferty’s been trying to get out of him what’s up but he’s not in the mood to talk evidently. Anyway I thought you’d like to know, in case you were worrying where he was.’
‘Thanks, Sal. Bloody hell, I wonder what’s happened?’ Kat frowned, anxiety turning her stomach. ‘He was fine earlier. I’ve been expecting him home. I’ve made our tea and the kids are in bed.’
‘Maybe,’ Sally said, after a moment’s hesitation, ‘you should come and collect him.’
‘Don’t be daft. How can I? I’ve got the kids.’
‘Our Summer and Ben are here doing nothing. I’m sure they’d mind them for you if you wanted to pop round and collect him.’
‘Yes, maybe I should. Are you sure they won’t mind?’
‘Course not, love. They’ve finished their meal, so I’ll pop over and ask them now. Expect them in ten minutes.’
She ended the call and Kat stared at the screen, chewing her lip as she wondered what on earth had made Jonah seek refuge in the pub. He wasn’t a drowning your sorrows sort of man, and anyway, what sorrows did he have to drown? As far as she was aware he’d had a good day. A good weekend in fact. Something had clearly gone wrong after they’d parted company earlier.
Ben and Summer arrived within ten minutes, as Sally had said, and they didn’t seem at all surprised that Kat was on a mission to save Jonah from himself.
‘I saw him hunched over the bar,’ Summer admitted. ‘He looks proper miserable.’
‘He got like that once before,’ Ben said. ‘When Sofia left. He was on a real downer for months, but then he pulled himself out of it and he’s been great ever since.’
