Keep Her Safe, page 7
Fuck me. If I see this girl in a red bikini right now, I will want to gauge my own eyes out. Her bathing suits rarely have any coverage over her ass and even less over what I assume to be very round and very perfect C-cup tits. “I don’t blame you, my pool is pretty nice.” She pulls her cover up over her head and tosses it to the chair.
Fuck. I try to remain unfazed but her bathing suit leaves very little to the imagination.
The throb in my dick has me shifting in my seat to relieve the ache. I’m trying to keep my gaze just on her face and not let it focus on her body, but it’s hard to miss. Hard to miss the tiny triangles that cover her tits or the even tinier one between her legs. “You’ve had a little bit to drink tonight; you sure you should be getting in the water?”
She looks at me as if to say, seriously? “Well, I guess it’s a good thing my lifeguard is on duty.” She heads towards the water and I stifle a groan when she turns around and I see that her bikini bottoms are a thong style highlighting her perfect ass.
“Isn’t Veronica coming?”
“She has a phone.” She giggles. “And a way into my house for that matter.”
I glare at her. “The main gate is one thing, but I told you not to share the code to the house with anyone.”
“It’s V.”
“I don’t care. I said no one. I’m changing it again,” I bark at her, already planning for what the new six digit code will be and I’m grateful for this new irritation so I can stop focusing on how bad I want to run my hands over her gorgeous curves.
“You think I can’t trust V?” She’s wading through the water slowly, the ripples barely grazing her breasts and my gaze flits back to them. She cocks her head to the side and gives me an innocent look that has my previous irritation melting away.
Don’t look at her tits.
“I think if she’s coming into the house intoxicated with Derek, she won’t have enough discretion to not let him see what she’s typing in, and I am not around Derek enough to know whether I trust him or not.”
She huffs. “Fine. Make it something easy for me to remember though.”
“That’s not the point.” I shake my head.
“Like your birthday.” She raises a hand. “Backwards.”
“How is that easy? You don’t even know what that is.”
“Of course, I do! Seven, eight, three, one, four, zero. April thirteenth, nineteen-eighty-seven but backwards.” She gestures like she’s typing it into her keypad.
I blink at her. “You remember my birthday?”
“Of course. I’m good at birthdays though.”
“Yes but…even the year?”
“I’m good at math and you’re thirty—five.”
“You’re terrible at math.” I correct and the thought that she’s able to rattle off my birthday so easily lingers in my brain longer than it should.
She huffs. “Can we use that or not?”
I smile at her because technically, yes. It’s obscure and difficult and an intruder only has about thirty seconds to get it right. I also have it wired that two wrong tries immediately alert the police. Which is why I don’t let her do it when she’s been drinking after more than a few visits from the police department when she’d gotten it wrong.
“Fine. When Veronica comes in and I’m sure you two are in for the night, I’ll change it.”
She nods and continues to move around the pool. I let my feet stretch out in front of me and look up at the sky. We sit in a comfortable silence, just the sounds of her splashing around in the water when she speaks up.
“Did you love her?”
I raise my head and look at Shay who’s moved a little further into the water so more of her breasts are covered. “What?”
“Your ex-girlfriend. You said she loved you. But…did you love her?”
“We are back on this?” I should have known that revealing details of my past would send Shay down a rabbit hole of wanting information.
“Well, you know everything about me and my past relationship. Thought we could even the playing field some.”
I want to tell her that is not how this works. While, yes, I know a lot about her because it’s my job, she doesn’t need to know anything about me, so I’m shocked that different words come out. “At the time, I thought so.”
“You’re not sure anymore?”
“No.” My lips form a line. “She was loyal and I valued that but I’m not sure that I loved her.”
“Loyalty is pretty important,” she says and I’m sure her recent experience is going to make her question everyone moving forward.
“Yes, of course. Probably the top of the list, but I wasn’t in love with her and that’s pretty important too.”
“Fair. Have you ever been in love?”
“I don’t think so.”
She nods. “Where are your parents? You don’t talk about them much. Or anyone in your family. Do you have siblings?”
“I do have parents, yes.” I nod. “Well, a father and a stepmother.”
She cocks her head to the side in question. “Where’s your mom?”
“She left when I was young.”
“I’m sorry, Damian,” she murmurs. “That’s tough. Were you old enough to remember her?”
I never talk about my mother. Ever. I didn’t even talk to Simone about her. She knew the basic details but talking about her in depth made me feel like shit.
“I wasn’t ready to be a mother. I can’t do this. I love you but I don’t want this,” she’d told my father before she left that night.
Even though I was only five years old, those words haunt me thirty years later. That the ‘this’ she didn’t want was me.
“Yes. I was five when she left.”
“I’m sorry, that’s really tough.”
“I don’t want to talk about it,” I say far harsher than I intend and her eyes widen in surprise. She probably assumes we’d be able to bond over not having our mothers around, and not that I’m probably more triggered about the loss of my mother than she is. Through meditation and a brief stint with every religion under the sun that had something to say regarding mortality, Shay has found some peace in her parents’ untimely death. That and a very dark sense of humor. I, however, have not worked through my mommy issues.
“Oh. Sorry.” She frowns.
“I didn’t mean to snap at you, I just…don’t talk about her to anyone.” She nods and wades into deeper water but still stays above it. She moves around for a while and though the silence stretches between us, it’s comfortable. The sounds of the trees rustling and the faint sounds of her pool make me feel calm despite the recent thoughts about my mother.
She makes her way to the steps and gets out of the pool in what looks like slow motion. She adjusts her bottoms and I have to resist the urge to do the same to my dick. Her towel is on the chaise lounge to the right of me so I’m surprised that she moves to my left side. I reach for her towel assuming that she’s going to ask me to hand it to her when I feel drops of water and her body hovering over my lap as she stretches across me to grab her towel. I don’t move an inch while she tries to tempt me by flaunting her body. My eyes dart down for a second, seeing her body in a position over my lap that would be perfect for me to spank her. Slap her barely-covered ass for trying to tempt me when I’m trying to do the right thing.
Is that what this is? Temptation? Is this about me? Or just a cry for a man’s attention after Paxton treated her like shit? Maybe her ego is bruised and she wants to feel like it’s not her fault that Paxton looked outside of their relationship for sex.
I hope she knows it’s not.
I can’t pry my eyes away from her even as she thankfully wraps the towel around herself. She wipes at her wet skin and I try to ignore the way the water slides down her slender figure.
She takes the seat next to me, stretches her long legs in front of her on the lounge, and lets the towel fall from around her. It’s a warmer summer, so it’s still about seventy-five degrees even this late at night and her pool is heated so she’s probably not too cold yet.
Like always, my eyes are drawn to her legs. They sweep up slowly to her torso, not letting my eyes feast for too long on her breasts but long enough that the image is ingrained in my brain. I make it to her eyes and they’re locked on mine. I know I can’t pretend I wasn’t just shamelessly staring at her. She gives me a smile so sexy and sinful before sinking her teeth into that bottom lip and I can feel the rest of my resolve withering.
I clear my throat, shaking the thoughts from my head, and stand to my feet. “Are you done swimming?” I ask her.
“Damian—” Her eyes follow me and I can already hear the question in her voice.
She’s interrupted by sounds from inside of the house and I turn my head just as Veronica comes out of her back door.
“Shay!” she squeals, and sure enough, I see Derek behind her—and Jeremy.
“Pool party!” she squeals as she comes skipping towards us. She passes me and makes it to the edge of the pool, wobbling slightly, and for a second, I think she might fall in. I take the few steps to reach her and grab her arm before she falls, keeping her steady and backing her away from the side.
“Uh uh,” I tell her. “Max will kill me if I let you drown.” Max usually camped out in front of the house whenever she was here so he isn’t super close by.
Veronica giggles before turning towards Shay, and when I turn to look at her, I see her eyes fixed on where my hand is wrapped around Veronica’s elbow.
I already know what she’s thinking. That it’s so easy for me to touch Veronica when I rarely touch her. She blinks and the look is gone but I can sense what my instincts are telling me are jealousy and probably a little bit of annoyance towards her friend for popping the intimate bubble Shay and I have been in tonight.
“You guys want to swim?” Veronica calls out to Jeremy and Derek and when they both tell her no, she rolls her eyes. “Well fine!” She looks at Shay. “What happened with Paxton?” She looks back at me and smiles at me. “I’ve got her now.” I don’t think she means to be dismissive. If anything, she’s probably a little mad at me for leaving without her because I know she wants to be there for Shay. “Thank you for getting her out of that.”
“Sure, let’s go in,” Shay says, standing up, and again, I run my gaze over her…quicker this time since we are in mixed company. “I’ll see you in the morning, Damian.”
“Are Derek and Jeremy staying?” I ask. I know nothing is going on between Shay and Jeremy but I can’t help but feel a little spike of jealousy if he’s staying here with her because I have seen the way his eyes run over her when she’s not looking. Maybe it’s just a general appreciation for how beautiful she is, but she’s newly single and he’s probably her closest male friend.
I know how these things go.
“I’ll let you know,” Shay says and the look she’s giving me makes me wonder if she can sense the reason I asked has nothing to do with her safety. “V?”
“Derek, yes, obviously. Is that okay?”
“Mmmhmmm,” she says, her eyes not leaving mine as she grabs her towel.
She turns away from me and links her arm with Veronica as they move into the house, giving me a perfect view of her round ass and the red fabric nestled between her cheeks. She looks over her shoulder, catching me, and when my eyes dart up to meet hers, she gives me a wicked smirk.
I am so fucked.
What the fuck, Shay? Why are you trying to go down this road again? Tempting Damian, for what? He’s not interested.
I’m back in my room, having left Derek, Jeremy, and Veronica in the living room while I change out of my bathing suit. I pull on a pair of leggings and a cropped sweater that lands just above my navel. I’m taking my hair down out of my bun just as the door opens and Veronica comes in drinking a glass of wine that I’m sure she’ll regret in the morning after all the alcohol she’s already consumed tonight.
“Okay, so what happened? I assume you don’t want to discuss anything around them.” She hitches a thumb over her shoulder to refer to Derek and Jeremy.
“Nothing! Oh my God, V, we were just talking,” I tell her.
She narrows her eyes, her eyebrows pinching together and a smile slowly slides across her red-painted lips. “I meant between you and your boyfriend you just broke up with? Not your bodyguard, but let’s put a pin in Paxton for a second because you’re clearly thinking about Damian if that’s where your mind went.”
Fuck.
“Sorry, I thought you meant—”
“Yes, I’m aware that’s what you thought. What I’m wondering is why.” Even though I’m sure she’s consumed a slew of drinks, I know she’s not going to let this go. The alcohol will probably make her more annoyingly relentless.
“I don’t know. He’s been more protective than usual and this whole thing with Paxton just has me feeling, I don’t know, insecure?” I let out a breath as I prepare to tell Veronica what happened. “Knowing he fucked every woman in Hollywood?”
“Whoa, what?” Her hazel eyes widen in shock.
“He’s fucked multiple women. The one I caught him with is just one of many. He couldn’t give me an exact number.”
She chokes on her wine. “What the fuck? He said that?”
“Yep,” I tell her popping the p. “If that gets out…” I let out a breath. “My God, I can already see the articles. I’m bad in bed. I’m a prude. I don’t give head. I really am the girl next door.” I tick off the reasons on my fingers. Disgust washes over me over how crude the tabloids can be. “If he’d fallen for some other woman that’s one thing, but him fucking everything in a skirt will become me not being able to keep him satisfied or whatever the fuck.”
“Or that he’s a serial cheater and a fucking asshole,” she argues.
“Right, but you and I both know that won’t be the only story.” I sigh angrily. “I’ve worked so hard to stay out of the drama. I’m not messy and I mind my business and yet here I am in the middle of my first heartbreak that has the ingredients to become a PR nightmare.”
“I am shocked he’s been able to fly under the radar about this for so long. Surely someone had to have talked. My god, was he issuing NDAs while she was still coming down from her orgasm?”
I roll my eyes and the petty words leave my mouth like a reflex. “Right, like she came.”
Veronica’s eyes widen as she giggles. “Oooh. Really now? You always talked about how great the sex was?”
“Women tell all kinds of lies when they’re in love,” I say in the most dead-panned tone with an expression to match. “I’d give it a six out of ten.”
“Ah a D for the D.” She giggles.
I sigh and make my way towards the door hoping she won’t circle back to her question about Damian. I don’t have any answers for her because I barely have answers for myself.
Yes, I’m attracted to him and I’d purposefully put on my tiniest bikini and strutted around him like I was presenting food to a starving man. Yes, I’ve always had a tiny crush on him that’s never gone away.
That’s it. He’s made it clear that nothing can ever happen between us.
But tonight…
We make it to the bottom steps where I see Damian standing in front of my door, staring down at his phone. His eyes immediately flit to me, and in the brief moment before his eyes move behind me to Veronica, I could have sworn he was looking at me differently. Like maybe he shouldn’t be looking at me.
It’s nearing two in the morning. Jeremy just left and Derek and Veronica have just escaped to their bedroom to “sleep,” but Veronica is not quiet and I can already tell they’re doing anything but sleeping. I’m sitting on my couch, finishing up the last bit of wine from the bottle that Veronica opened when the familiar sounds of the porno movie being shot in my guest room right now reminds me that I haven’t had sex in quite some time. And also, that I definitely do not want to listen to that.
It’s been over a month since Paxton and I had sex, and to my knowledge, it was for no other reason than geography. In light of new events, who the fuck knows.
But I like sex. A lot. Even when I didn’t come, which happened more often than I would have liked, I still loved the intimacy of sex. Touching. Tasting. The moans and how slick and wet everything becomes as you glide against each other.
Fuck, I am horny.
And slightly drunk.
Which is a very dangerous combination.
The sounds of Derek grunting snaps me from those feelings and irritation blazes through me. I wasn’t a stranger to hearing Veronica have sex, unfortunately. Our dressing rooms on set shared a wall and she and Derek often retreated to her dressing room to fuck after the on-screen couple they portrayed had gotten hot and heavy.
I take another sip of my wine when a wicked thought floats through my mind.
No.
Go masturbate or something because seeking out Damian while you’re this horny is just going to get you into trouble.
I swallow thinking about the man who has been in the back of my mind for the past five years and in the front of it for the past few hours.
“A rebound is normal,” I say out loud to no one because I’m still alone. A sexy sound penetrates the air and I take that as an agreement. I roll my eyes at my justification.
You cannot rebound with Damian.
Why not?
Because it will make things awkward as fuck and that’s if he even wants to go down this road with you at all.
I go to the front of my house and peek out the front window that faces the guesthouse, noting his lights are still on. I tap my red manicured nail against the glass in rapid succession while my mind goes back and forth over whether I’m going to do this.
Okay relax, it’s not like I’m going to go over there in a trench coat with nothing underneath. Let’s just feel out the situation and see where it goes.
