All the Feels, page 34
You’re my wish come true, Wren, he’d told her in their blackout-curtained suite on the Strip, resting naked in her warm arms after one of their very frequent and delightful pegging interludes. Please be mine forever. Please make me yours.
They’d called everyone the next morning, and three days later, he became Mr. Wren Clegg. Or, rather, still Alex Woodroe, but they both knew that was just a formality.
“The hundredth time he complained about how cheap he felt, I couldn’t take anymore, Vika,” Lauren said, completely deadpan. “It was either a ring or a muzzle.”
The frown was hard to muster, but he tried anyway. “Why was I not told about the muzzle option? We both know I enjoy—”
Her hand covered his mouth, and she spoke over him. “It was a lovely ceremony, and we’re delighted so many of our friends and family could come on such short notice.”
His mom and her parents. All his Gates castmates, other than Ian. Sionna. Dina.
Everyone had gathered in the small, lovely hotel chapel and watched Alex and Wren walk down the aisle arm in arm, because fuck tradition. They’d begin as they meant to go on. Together.
When he licked her palm, her thighs pressed together, but her face remained placid as she added, “Just think of how much money we saved on videography services, Vika.”
Very dry. Very practical. Very Wren.
But he’d seen her blink back tears as they’d exchanged vows, just like him.
“My heartfelt congratulations to you both, and best wishes for a lifetime of happiness together.” Vika’s smile was soft. “Lauren, I noticed your necklace, and I wondered whether it was a wedding gift. It’s quite unusual, isn’t it?”
“One of a kind.” Wren smiled back at her. “Just like my husband.”
Since she wasn’t a tattoo person, and he wouldn’t pressure her to do anything that made her uncomfortable, he’d given her a necklace to wear over her heart. A platinum chain with a feather pendant, which he’d had inscribed with the word RIDICULOUS and studded with aquamarines the color of her eyes.
“You’re not ridiculous,” he’d told her when she opened the velvet box. “But I am. Ridiculously in love with you.”
Except in the shower, she never took it off, to his continued smug delight.
Still, he’d itched to give her something else too, something she chose for herself, so right before their wedding, he’d begged her to name something—anything—she wanted. And to his absolute bewilderment, she’d promptly requested a bathrobe made from the same cotton fabric he used for his towels.
“One that fits me right,” she’d specified. “I eyed that robe in the guesthouse for months, wishing it came in my size.”
He’d stared at her, entirely nonplussed. “It is in your size, Wren. I called Dina while we were in Spain and had it made before your arrival. Why the fuck would I give you a robe that didn’t fit you?”
“Oh.” Her face had turned delectably pink. “I guess I shouldn’t have assumed.”
When he’d demanded an apology in nonverbal, naked form, she’d happily obliged.
“And what did you give him as a wedding gift?” Vika asked.
Once more, Wren smiled. “I wrote him a love letter.”
“Oh, how sweet.” Vika pressed a hand to her heart, beaming.
Since his reunion with Wren, the two of them had acted out so many of his favorite fics. They’d kissed for science. Banged once, to get it out of their systems. Pretended their marriage was arranged, then accidental. Last week, they’d even acted out the body-swap trope, with surprisingly hilarious results.
Wren had strutted around their fucking house like a goddamn peacock, spouting absolute bullshit the whole time and tearing off her shirt at every conceivable opportunity.
He’d never admit it, but damn. She could have won a fucking award for that portrayal.
She understood him. And because she did, for his wedding gift, she’d written him a story on AO3, featuring the two of them as her OTP.
Well, officially Cupid and Robin, but they both knew better.
The story was perfect. Better than anything she could have bought, because really, what the fuck did he need other than her love?
Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
“One more question, and then we’ll get to the reader’s poll, which ends . . .” Vika nodded to her assistant, who tapped her cell screen. “Now. They’ve chosen the final topic of the interview, and even I haven’t seen the results. It’ll be a surprise to all of us.”
Huh. That seemed . . . potentially problematic, since some people were total assholes.
“Alex . . .” Vika’s brow furrowed. “You’ve had a tumultuous past year.”
If she hadn’t asked a question like this, he would have been surprised. Happy, but surprised. He had his answer ready, once she was done talking.
She ticked off the events on her fingers. “There was an arrest. An attempted attack on the red carpet. An altercation with a fan. Professional censure and lost roles. A hit new show. A surprise wedding.”
“There was also love.” He stroked Lauren’s tensing neck. “You left that out.”
“I did.” The blogger inclined her head. “That said, given some of the less-positive events that occurred, do you have any regrets?”
Of course he did. Over the last year, he’d inconvenienced and scared and hurt so many people he loved. And although he’d forgiven himself for not walking away, he couldn’t exactly applaud his decision to keep playing Cupid in that terrible final season.
But his regrets were his own, and they were his to keep. And if they’d brought him to Wren, he’d bear their weight gladly.
So he told his first lie of the entire interview. “Nope. No regrets.”
Vika’s sharp glance revealed her skepticism, but she didn’t push. She likely knew there was no point, not unless she wanted the interview to end prematurely.
And it wasn’t a total falsehood, really. When it came to his arrest, he still had zero regrets. None. The people who mattered either knew exactly what had happened or understood he wouldn’t have thrown punches without a damn good reason.
Everyone else could go fuck themselves.
“Okay.” Vika gave a tiny shrug and let it go. “Time for our final question, formulated and selected by my readers.”
Her assistant handed over the cell phone. Vika’s lips moved slightly as she read the poll results, and she frowned.
There was a long pause.
“I’ll be honest.” The blogger sighed. “I don’t love the question.”
Wren’s thigh against his didn’t twitch. Her shoulder under his palm remained loose. Her eyes were clear and curious and unafraid.
“Whatever your readers asked will be fine.” The steady confidence in Wren’s voice couldn’t be faked, and he decided to trust it. To trust her ability to weather whatever was about to happen. “Go ahead, Vika.”
“What would you say to people who believe there’s no way a marriage like yours, between two such different people, can possibly last?” Vika pinched the bridge of her nose and shook her head. “I’m sorry. Please feel free not to answer.”
His skull began pounding.
He and Wren had different personalities and came from different backgrounds. Fair enough. But this question wasn’t about that, really, and everyone in the room understood its unspoken, unkind implications.
The question was a veiled swipe at how she looked. It was a prediction that their marriage would fail because the public considered him—and not her—attractive.
His face was turning hot, his breathing fast, but he bit his tongue. Hard.
Wren laid a cool, steady hand over his. “I’ll take this one, Alex.”
Please trust that I’ll advocate for myself, she’d said on those stairs months ago, his cheek cradled in her palm. Please trust me.
He took a deep breath. Another.
Then he nodded, a mute invitation for her to handle it.
After that, she didn’t hesitate.
“Please excuse my profanity, Vika,” she said calmly, “but in the immortal words of my husband: Those people can go fuck themselves.”
Vika gasped, and his mouth dropped open for a moment too, because—Wren, of all people? Wren had invited untold thousands of people to fuck themselves?
And then, jubilant, he tugged his wife into his arms and squeezed her tight and laughed in her ear. Loudly. Unkind observers might even have called it a cackle.
When he pulled back and raised his hand for a high five, she returned it.
“Big Harpy Energy!” he shouted, and it echoed through their home. “Big Harpy Goddamn Energy, Wren!”
She inclined her head. “The Crone Arts student has become the Crone Arts master.”
Her smile was serene and proud, and he loved her so fucking much, the sheer volume and force of it should have split him wide open.
THE NEXT DAY, despite Vika’s doubts, Alex convinced her not to edit out the final question.
Three days later, her audience saw the interview in its entirety.
And ten minutes after that, the first new fan account—@LaurenCleggFTW—went live.
Acknowledgments
THE FACT THAT I EMERGED FROM 2020—AKA THE CURSÈD Year of Doom—somewhat intact is entirely due to my friends and family. Those friends consistently emailed, DMed, FaceTimed, and wrote letters and postcards to remind me I was loved and never as isolated as I sometimes felt, and their efforts meant everything to me. I owe special thanks to Therese Beharrie, Emma Barry, and Mia Sosa, who kept me tethered to the world outside my Swedish apartment and who always, always cared about my well-being. You are so dear to me. Thank you.
My husband, as always, accepted me precisely as I am and did his damnedest to support me however he could. My daughter’s pride and faith in me, her unstinting affection and joy and humor, lit the dark Swedish winter. My mom devoted so much time and effort to sending care packages of potato buns, Utz pretzels, and rocks (of course) across the Atlantic. She knew my long absence from the U.S. hurt me, so she cushioned the blow with each overstuffed box, and I’m so grateful. I love you all.
I’m also very, very thankful to Elle Keck, Kayleigh Webb, and everyone else at Avon who worked so hard to make this book shine. Poor Elle had to accomplish some brilliant feats of editing with this manuscript, and I’m still not entirely sure how she managed to wrestle it down to a reasonable length while keeping everything I love about the story intact. Witchcraft, maybe?
As always, my amazing agent Sarah Younger has been indefatigable in her support. It means the world to me to have her in my corner, always.
Leni Kauffman created the most beautiful cover imaginable. I can’t stop staring at it. It’s not only gorgeous, but also perfect for and specific to the story, and I can’t thank her enough.
I couldn’t have written this story without a great deal of help. Susannah Erwin spent untold hours talking to me about California in general and L.A. in particular, and her incredible patience and generosity shaped All the Feels in countless ways. Erin generously shared her experiences as an emergency services clinician with me, and those experiences helped ground Lauren’s character in reality. Shannon Bothwell planned one hell of a kick-ass road trip for Alex and Lauren, and I’m so grateful for her guidance. Once the story was written, Susannah, Therese, and Emma all tackled my 126,000-word behemoth of a draft and offered such insightful feedback—and Emma even read the book a second time once it was edited down to a manageable length, because she is one of the most giving people I’ve ever met.
Melissa Vera, Meryl Wilsner, and Brina Starler were kind enough to read the story and make sure Alex’s character and experiences rang true to them, and I’m beyond thankful for their time and thoughtfulness.
Finally, I want to thank all my readers, and especially those who tweeted to me or emailed me about Spoiler Alert. Your kindness helped me through a tough, tough year, and I hope my stories provide you with joy and distraction when you need both. Hugs and love to you. ♥
About the Author
OLIVIA DADE grew up an undeniable nerd, prone to ignoring the world around her as she read any book she could find. Her favorites, though, were always, always romances. As an adult, she earned an M.A. in American history and worked in a variety of jobs that required the donning of actual pants: Colonial Williamsburg interpreter, high school teacher, academic tutor, and (of course) librarian. Now, however, she has finally achieved her lifelong goal of wearing pajamas all day as a hermit-like writer and enthusiastic hag. She currently lives outside Stockholm with her patient Swedish husband, their whip-smart daughter, and the family’s ever-burgeoning collection of books.
Discover great authors, exclusive offers, and more at hc.com.
Maria and Peter have been filming on the same remote island for years—and because of the costars’ famously banter-filled joint interviews, Gods of the Gates fans have been shipping them for just as long. Now that the show is ending, they’ll finally yield to temptation . . . but a future together will require more than desire.
Maria and Peter’s love story is coming Fall 2022
Praise for All the Feels
“An absolutely witty, swoon-worthy behind-the-scenes romp! Delightful from beginning to end!”
—Julie Murphy, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Dumplin’
“All the Feels leaves you swooning and eager for more!”
—Denise Williams, author of How to Fail at Flirting
“Joyful, clever, and full of heart, with two irresistible characters whose connection is both gorgeously sweet and wildly hot. Mixing riotous humor and aching tenderness, All the Feels is all the things I love about romance. Olivia Dade has jumped to the top of my auto-buy list!”
—Rachel Lynn Solomon, nationally bestselling author of The Ex Talk
“If you’re a fan of romances that feature nuanced protagonists, whip-smart dialogue, scorching chemistry, and sidesplitting humor, look no further than Olivia Dade’s books. This author is an absolute gem!”
—Mia Sosa, USA Today bestselling author of The Worst Best Man
“Olivia Dade is so gentle with her characters, giving them each the space to become their best selves while also being loved for all their flaws. All the Feels is hilarious and poignant at the same time.”
—Cat Sebastian, author of The Queer Principles of Kit Webb
“I adore All the Feels. This slow-burn romance had me falling in love every step of the way.”
—Meryl Wilsner, author of Something to Talk About
“Olivia Dade once again delivers a book as sexy and charming as it is cathartic. Her books speak to my soul as she deftly tackles complicated subjects with humor, heart, and infinite kindness. I adored All the Feels and can’t wait to see what she writes next. Olivia Dade is an auto-buy author!”
—Jessie Mihalik, author of Chaos Reigning
Praise for Spoiler Alert
“Dade delivers and then some. This book frolics through fields of fannish allusion and metatext. . . . It takes a skillful writer to juggle so many elements, yet the emotional through-line shines clear and strong at every point.”
—New York Times Book Review
“With richly drawn characters you’ll love to root for, Olivia Dade’s books are a gem of the genre—full of humor, heart, and heat.”
—Kate Clayborn, author of Love Lettering
“Olivia Dade is consistently one of my favorite authors. Her writing is warm and witty, frequently funny and often achingly poignant. She has a knack for creating sympathetic characters who leap off the page, with their vulnerable hearts and relatable struggles.”
—Lucy Parker, author of Battle Royal
“Olivia Dade writes with such compassion and kindness for her characters, and, in the process, makes you want to live in the world she creates.”
—Jenny Holiday, USA Today bestselling author
Also by Olivia Dade
Spoiler Alert
Love Unscripted Series
Desire and the Deep Blue Sea
Tiny House, Big Love
There’s Something About Marysburg Series
Teach Me
40-Love
Sweetest in the Gale: A Marysburg Story Collection
Copyright
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
ALL THE FEELS. Copyright © 2021 by Olivia Dade. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the nonexclusive, nontransferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse-engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.
Cover design by Yeon Kim
Cover illustration by Leni Kauffman
Emojis throughout © FOS_ICON/Shutterstock, Inc.
FIRST EDITION
Digital Edition OCTOBER 2021 ISBN: 978-0-06-300559-4
Version 09012021
Print ISBN: 978-0-06-300558-7
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