Cross Your Mind, page 25
I’ll be waiting.
39. NANCY
THE REST OF THE WEEK, I clung to my work routine like a lifesaver, parking out the front of Toverton Tower just before nine, taking the lift directly to the top floor, and staying in the secure office until six. Alex was there before I arrived and after I left, but, as promised, he made no move to speak to me.
In fact, as I worked studiously, trying to ignore his presence across the hall, he never looked over once. Not a glance as he went in and out of meetings or a single visit to our office to chat with David about the audit—nothing for four days. To my annoyance, it burnt me. Yet, every evening, when I opened the door to the flat, there was an ostentatious display of flowers waiting to taunt me. Although no card was attached, it was obvious who they were from.
On Tuesday, they were fire-coloured lilies and chrysanthemums, matching the floral spray prints of the Prada dress Alex had bought for my birthday. The one he’d so delicately stripped from my body.
On Wednesday, I received gorgeous-smelling blue verbena and baby pink roses. It took me a moment to realise they matched Alex’s hoodie and the knickers I wore the night we first made love. I stalked into my bedroom to avoid the display, which I couldn’t bring myself to throw away.
On Thursday, lipstick-red carnations sat waiting, matching my dress and heels from the fated gala. That pissed me off. How dare he remind me of that awful night? But his message was loud and clear.
I’m waiting for you to talk.
If anything, it made me more resolute. If he thought he could coax me into talking by throwing his money around, he didn’t know me at all.
As Friday afternoon ticked on, I congratulated myself for sticking to my no-contact rule for the whole week. It was post-Alex day six, and I had a free weekend ahead of me, hanging out, watching TV, and pottering around, all without the prospect of seeing him. I ignored the hollow ache in my chest and turned to David. “What are your plans this weekend?”
“I’m taking Jayden to Paris for our anniversary.” His brow flashed over the rim of his glasses. “We’re meeting at St Pancras straight after work to catch the Eurostar—first-class—then staying in the Four Seasons with balcony views of the Eiffel Tower.”
“Can I fit in your suitcase?” I laughed. “That sounds the business. Jayden is a lucky man.”
“He is, isn’t he?” David chuckled. “He’s also a man who likes the finer things, which makes this gift easy, if not eye-watering.”
“How long have you two been together?”
“Six years and married for three. Alex was my best man.”
I tried to hide a frown at the mention of him. “I didn’t know that. I bet it was a classy do.”
“It was…bougie. Of course, Jayden wouldn’t have it any other way. He looks after the PR for several up-and-coming celebs. The latest winner of Show Me Yours is one of his,” David explained, then his expression drew sombre. “Listen, I know you haven’t said anything, but it’s pretty clear you and Alex are going through a rough patch. I appreciate you keeping it professional at work, but I also understand that’s no easy task. I just want to say that I’m here if you need any support or want to chat.”
“Thanks, David, I appreciate it. It’s not been easy, but we’re both being adults about it, and we won’t be on this assignment forever.”
“So, what are your plans this weekend?”
“Chilling out, catching up on some TV. There’s a tub of cookie dough ice cream with my name on it.”
“Good call.” He smiled sympathetically and rose. “Well, I’m going to love you and leave you. I’d better shoot if I want to beat the traffic.”
“Have an amazing anniversary.” I waved him off, trying to ignore the pain inside. Monday marked the two-month anniversary of when I’d first met Alex in the lobby.
When five came around, I left to change into my leathers. As usual, Alex was still working at his desk and made no move to look at me. I said goodbye to Evelyn and took the lift.
Once home, my eyes skimmed the kitchen, but there was no bouquet. I sighed. He’s finally given up. At least that will make it easier going forward.
I went to the sink for a glass of water just as Mum entered the lounge looking flustered.
“You okay?”
She held out a manila folder filled with documents. “A solicitor just left. He came by with this.”
My gut twisted. “What is it?”
“The deeds to the flat. He needed me to sign the papers. It took me ages to read through everything. I didn’t want to sign my life away or something. He said he works for Alex. Love, he’s bought the flat and put it in my name. We own the place.”
“What?” I had to shake my head a few times for Mum’s words to compute. “What the actual fuck!”
“I don’t know what to say. Why would he do this? You’re not together. Do you think he’s paying us off for something? Does he expect you to keep quiet about this stuff with Mimi?”
“I don’t think keeping me quiet was his goal,” I murmured.
Before I realised what I was doing, my phone was in my hand, and I was calling Alex. He answered after one ring. “I’m still up on seventy-one. Evan’s out front and will bring you back.”
“You conniving shithead! How dare you!”
“We’re not talking like this. Take the car. I don’t want you riding angry again,” he said forthrightly before dropping the call.
I almost sent the phone flying across the lounge.
“What is it? What did he say?”
“Sorry, Mum, I have to go back to work. I’m gonna sort out this wanker once and for all.” I stalked out the flat and down to the Ninja. As Alex advised, Evan was waiting for me. I blanked him and took my helmet out the top box.
“Ms Cooper, you’re upset. Let me drive you back to Toverton Tower.”
“I don’t want a thing from him, and I know he’s pulling your strings, so just leave me alone.” I glanced back and saw hurt in Evan’s eyes. “I’m sorry. That wasn’t fair. I know you mean well, but I’m not accepting a lift from him.”
“Ms Cooper, Lord Toverton cares about you very much—as do I. It’s not safe to ride when you’re angry.”
I took a minute, calming my racing pulse as I considered his words. “I’m gonna ride, but I’ll take the route slowly, and you can follow behind. That’s the best I can do.”
Evan went to protest but saw my resolve. He nodded and got into the Range Rover. I flipped the kickstand and set off gently, following the Thames back to the City while ensuring I kept Evan in my mirrors.
40. ALEX
I PACED AROUND THE OFFICE, watching the numbers on the display progress up from zero, and drew a deep breath, readying for what was sure to be a long and difficult conversation—one I’d utterly manipulated Nancy into. The lift dinged, and the car doors opened. After a week of prising my eyes from the want of gazing at her, here she was. My bella donna in biker leathers, just like the first time I’d laid eyes on her.
She looked beautiful and pissed off all at once as she strode towards me. “Well, here I am. Back on the top floor of your ridiculous phallic tower, just as you predicted. Now, where the hell do you get off flinging your money around?”
I smiled. “It got you here talking to me, didn’t it?”
“You manipulative ass! How dare you? You stroll into mine and Mum’s life like a wealthy tourist, move us out the flat, do it up, and then have the nerve to buy it off the bloody council.”
“I may have put the money up, but I don’t own it. I wanted to give a permanent home to two incredible women who should have had an easier time of it from day one.”
“Wow! Thanks for the charity,” she scoffed. “You know, I’ve spent my life being poor, but very few people in this world have made me feel worthless like you have.”
Her slur hit its mark. “How the hell have I made you feel worthless? Everything I’ve done, I’ve done for us. For our relationship!”
She stormed around the table, maintaining her ferocity against my rising anger. “We don’t need your handouts. What we need is a fair chance. Don’t you think I know Mum’ll never be able to save enough to buy the flat? No matter how many years she’s dreamt of it, she’ll always be renting. She’s been in debt so long that no one would give her a mortgage anyway. But the presumption that we need your help.”
She rounded on me. “Let me tell you something. Mum will own that flat, but I’ll be the one who buys it for her when I’m an executive at Goldfields because I know I’m that good. I’ll take on this world and win, and I’ll do it on my own merits, not with your money, you hear me?”
I stepped closer, longing to reach out and touch the incredible energy radiating from her. “Of course you will. You’re brilliant. I wasn’t trying to insult you or Tracy. Perhaps it was crass, but I didn’t know how else to get you in this room talking. You blanked me. Cut me off. This has been one of the most painful weeks of my life. I was desperate, Nancy.”
She paused, considering me, and for a moment, I thought she would soften, but instead, a thin smile lined her face. “You know, I get it now. I’m like one of those abused children you posh people give money to by behaving like a bunch of entitled pricks. It makes you feel good, right? All warm and fuzzy inside. You throw your pennies down for the rest of us to scramble for.” She turned away in disgust. “Here’s some free accounting advice: you can write the flat off your next tax bill. Call it a charitable donation. But I’m sure your team of accountants have already thought of that.”
My temper boiled over. “Why the hell are you making me out to be the enemy? Where did this low opinion of me come from? Because, from what I remember, we were happy before the gala. We’d just made love for the first time, and then the next day, bam, you’re gone without a word. What the hell happened?”
Nancy hesitated, but the fury in her eyes never cooled. She strode over, sat on the boardroom table, and crossed her arms. “What was your deal with Mimi?”
It wrong-footed me. “What do you mean?”
The smirk she gave contained no mirth. “I think the question is straightforward. What was the deal you made with Mimi over dinner last Friday?”
“I paid her off to stop harassing us.”
“That’s not the whole story, is it? Let me use your exact words as I’ve had a week to mull them over. You approached her with the proposal.”
“Yes, I approached her…” She watched me as my cogs turned. “You weren’t assaulted in that bathroom, were you?”
“Verbally assaulted, maybe.”
“Who was in the bathroom?” When she refused to speak, I prowled closer, having had quite enough of this game. “For heaven’s sake, Nancy, tell me!”
“Your soon-to-be wife, of course.”
“My…soon-to-be wife?” I repeated slowly. She nodded. “I take it you mean Mimi.” Quiet anger rumbled off me as I reached her.
Nancy kept her back defiantly straight. “She told me everything: all about your title, what your parents expect of you, the arrangement they made for you two to marry. Your wife must be a woman bred to be a duchess. One from your own stock. Why the upper classes make relationships sound like a trip to a stud farm, I’ll never understand, but that’s the point, isn’t it? I’m not meant to understand. A poor girl from a housing estate could never be the right wife for a duke. That’s why you planned to keep me as your mistress.”
My mouth couldn’t have dropped any lower. “My…mistress?”
“That’s what the apartment’s for, right? Your dad gave it to you to keep your piece on the side in, just as he does. Apparently, it’s a family tradition. What thoroughly upstanding noblemen of the realm you are.” Her sarcasm seared the air.
I took a moment to suppress the sick rising in my stomach. “Let me get this straight. Miriam accosted you at the gala and told you that I’d made a deal to take her as my spouse, and future duchess, and that I planned to keep you as my mistress…for sexual favours, companionship, what exactly?”
“I have no idea what your plans for me were.” Nancy leaned in. “And I don’t want to know because nothing in this world could coax me into that role. Not gifts, not property, not cold hard cash. I know what I’m worth and what I deserve, and it’s a loyal partner. One who respects me. Someone who loves me for me!”
“Nancy—”
“You manipulated me perfectly. Used Mum to get me in that apartment the day after our first date and then convinced me to stay there. You must’ve thought I was getting cosy with the situation when you clapped Versace and diamonds on me. What a novelty I must have looked like to your friends and family. ‘Look at Alex slumming it with his dressed-up sex doll—’”
“Shut up!” I grasped her shoulders. “I would never make that deal. I would never do that to you. And I sure as hell would never think of you so grotesquely. You’re a goddess!”
“You’ll say anything.” She shook her head. “I’m not playing this gam—”
“No! You’ve heard the rest, now you’ll listen to me! As badly chosen as my words to you may have been that night, I have never proposed marriage to Mimi. The deal I made over dinner was a five per cent stock share in Toverton PLC and a place on the board. It gives her voting rights, just like her mother. I was loath to hand her family more power over my family’s interests, but I know it’s what her father’s gunning for, and she’ll do whatever Papa asks.” I pulled away, running my hands through my hair, nearly crazed. I’d been played like a damned fiddle! “Marry Miriam? She’s Cruella de Vil! It’s insanity. This is insanity!”
“You gave away a five per cent share of the second-largest tech firm in London?” She gazed at me wide-eyed. “The firm you’ve spent the last seven years building back up after your dad stripped it to cover his gambling debts. If you’re looking for insanity, that’s it!”
You can never hide your finances from an auditor. “Yes, and I’d do a hell of a lot more for you without a second thought,” I said, willing her to trust me.
“Alex, Mimi showed me the engagement ring.”
I felt the blood drain from my face. “What engagement ring?”
Her expression turned murderous. “You’re really asking me to describe the ring you gave her—”
“An emerald, square cut,” I interjected. “A gold band with a row of five diamonds studded on each side.” Her brow formed a V. I walked to my desk and put my eye to a scanner. A drawer unlocked, and I removed the small antique heart box covered in worn brown leather. I took it over to Nancy and undid the clasp to reveal the ring I’d described. “This is my family’s proposal ring.”
She stared at it, mystified. “You keep it at work?”
“This office is basically Fort Knox.” I shrugged. “Nancy, I would never treat you like my father has my mother. It broke her heart. She’s a shell now because the man she loved belittled her, stripped away her self-esteem day by day, and then went off with another woman while she lived alone as his wife. I could never do that.”
She rocked her head. “None of this makes any sense. Why would Mimi tell me all that?”
“Revenge. Trying to manipulate the situation in her favour. Sheer lunacy. Maybe all those reasons.”
“But she told me it’s your duty to sire an heir.”
“It is,” I whispered, my hands stroking down her arms, trying to remove the broken expression on her face. “But I don’t accept the terms.”
What a thing to admit less than a month into a relationship that could hardly be described as bright and sunny at present. ‘Say, bella, how about we knock out a few kids together, no pressure?’ Christ! If it were me, I’d run! Yet her focus didn’t linger on the daunting prospect of marriage and children, and instead went somewhere I hadn’t expected.
“But you kept her in the apartment before me, and other women too.”
My grip on her tightened. “It was a mistake, a terrible error in judgement. My intention in offering you number eight wasn’t to treat you like my mistress. It was so you’d have your own place where we could be together. But you were miserable there, like every woman before, because of me.” It was the first time I’d admitted that to anyone, including myself.
“I’ve only ever been willing to share part of myself because I’m petrified of feeling more. All I’ve known is the pain intimacy caused, never the joy it could bring. But when I saw the expression on your face as you left, I understood what I’d done—the betrayal in your eyes. I saw the terrible pattern I’d been repeating, the same pattern going back generations. So, the next day, I put the apartment on the market. It’s been sold, Nancy. It doesn’t exist anymore. I should never have accepted it in the first place.” I took her hand and placed it on my heart. “It’s not who I am in here.”
She stared at my chest for some time, looking pale and drawn. “I need to move.”
“Of course,” I said quietly, but it took me a long moment to release her.
Nancy dropped down from the table, and I returned the ring to the drawer, then went to the cellarette to pour a large whisky. “Would you like a cognac?” She shook her head, cradling her arms as she gazed at the skyline. I sat nearby, watching her. “What are you thinking about?”
“I’m trying to get my head around all this… I never thought I could be manipulated again.”
“What do you mean again?”
Her brows knit in the window’s reflection. Then, she turned to me. “How did you find out my address when we first met? I checked, and we aren’t listed anywhere public. We made sure of it. But somehow, you found out.”
I looked into her tired eyes, the sensation reflected inside me. I’d spent so long lying, especially to myself. The truth was her bottom line. “I got your number plate and hacked into the DVLA database to bring up your licence. That gave me your address and date of birth. I then used your ID to run a DBS check with the police for any criminal convictions.” I paused, considering. In for a penny. “And, after you had a panic attack and then cried when we were intimate, I hacked your phone, and I’ve been tracking it since.”
