Rebellion in the Mist, page 18
The echo of boots on the stone floor of the hallway washed over me until Ameal leaned against the wall next to me. I couldn’t look at him, and continued to stare straight ahead.
“We don’t win every battle. Some days it’s wisest to stop and rest. Get ourselves back together before trying again.” He mirrored my interest in the opposite wall.
“So everyone out there saw me miss my chance with Gallia and throw myself at Ransom like a maniac?”
“I doubt anyone else was paying as close attention to you as I was when Parisa approached.” He paused. “But, yes, I think everyone saw the Ransom thing.”
Chapter twenty-four
My humiliation wasn’t dimmed by the lemonade for very long. Typically considered slow by fae standards, my healing had no problem scrubbing the alcohol from my system in record time.
That evening, I was laying in my bed, allowing myself to wallow in my embarrassment when my door creaked open. Wynn walked in carrying a box from the seamstress in Port Mora.
I practically threw myself at her. “Please never leave me again.”
She deposited the box on my bed. “I stopped by Jo's room on my way here and Ameal filled us in on today's event. So Ransom really is your type, huh?”
“Oh, stop. I lost control of the situation and didn't know how to fix it. I keep trying to tell you that I get impulsive and flirty when I don't know what to do.”
“Clearly, if your solution was to try to jump in bed with Ransom.” She frowned thoughtfully. “You could do worse, though.”
“There was no wise lady’s maid there to keep me in line.”
“Well, I can’t say I’ll always be by your side. We only brought back a third of the dresses. But you already know I’ll help you when I can.”
She sat on my bed next to me and told me about Port Mora. It was nice to feel the normalcy of a town going about its daily life through her words. I got to forget for an hour that I was threatening all of our lives with my incompetency.
Mansby and a few other servants brought in a trunk of dresses. Wynn and I watched them carry them into my dressing chamber and exit my suite from our post on my bed.
I locked the door behind them. “I guess they’re aware now that I needed to let my dresses out.”
“Oh, you can be pretty certain the entire castle will know by tomorrow morning. The people here are efficient with their gossip, but I couldn’t carry all those up here myself.”
I sighed. “I suppose I’ve already given them plenty to gossip about. What does this really matter?”
“I did spare you a little scandal, though, and brought that box up myself.” She pointed to the now-forgotten box on my bed that I had assumed was a personal purchase for Wynn.
“What’s in there?” Dread built inside of me at the idea of another ugly surprise today.
“Open it.”
I hesitantly lifted the lid.
It was full of undergarments.
They weren’t the utilitarian ones I had brought from the Empire. They were all lacy, silky, far more revealing, and many were even see-through. Brassieres made of lace with unnecessary bows attached to them and that looked as though support was merely an afterthought, not their purpose. I held up what I assumed was a scrap of fabric, but the lace had ribbons coming from it in a T shape.
“What in the Mother’s name is this?”
“Underwear. For your butt,” Wynn laughed as she oriented them the correct direction in my hands to the way they were meant to be worn.
“These look like they are for other parts of me and decidedly not for my butt.”
“Apparently the dressmaker was appalled to think that you would wear her hard work with the ugly, outdated men’s shorts people from the mainland use. She forced me to bring these back to you. I think she slightly altered some of the dresses to be more in line with fashion here. Hey, maybe with these, Ransom won’t turn you down next time.”
I threw the pair of underwear I was holding at her, which she casually caught midair and tossed back in the box in a single movement.
“I would have paid good money to watch that dressmaker explain what all these are to you,” I laughed.
“Fortunately for your coin purse, that didn’t need to happen.”
“What do you mean?” I gasped. “Is this what they wear in the East?”
She chuckled. “No.”
“Then how do you know this is underwear for my butt?”
“I’ve seen them in action here.”
“Oh, I didn’t know you had someone special here.” George or Lina never would have kept a new partner from me, even if it was the Emperor himself. I was again reminded that Wynn and I weren’t truly friends, no matter how much I’d come to like her.
“It’s not exactly something I can draw attention to.”
She couldn’t confide anything in me that might reflect poorly on her. We were just associates, shoved together on the same mission. Of course she wouldn’t share those personal details of her life with me when it could get her in trouble with the Protectorate.
The loneliness I felt in the company of others here was beginning to take its toll. Lev pushing me away, failing at this mission at every turn, Wynn keeping me at arm’s length. It all dug at the emptiness inside of me.
“Well, I should head off to bed,” I said, trying to sever the uncomfortable moment.
Wynn nodded and left without a good night.
I wasn’t sure if Wynn was going to show up for our seventh day breakfast the next morning, but I woke early and dressed in hopes she would. She arrived at my door with a tray as though nothing had passed the night before, so I didn’t mention it either. We ate around banal conversation for most of the meal. When I finally set down my fork, my thoughts were everywhere except with the weather we had been discussing.
“Wynn, I don’t know what to do anymore.”
“With what? That underwear? I am not the one to show you how to put those on.” She smirked impishly. “I bet Ransom has seen things like that in Agora and would be willing to help.”
“Which is it? Am I fumbling over Lev or sleeping with Ransom?” I snapped.
I was trying to be serious. Our lives were on the line and she was sitting here joking. I didn’t need her to point out how clueless I was about everything. I was well aware.
The tension of the mission had worn me so thin, I was fighting with one of the only people I could probably trust. I sunk my head into my hands. “I’m sorry, this mission…”
She patted the top of my head awkwardly. “There’s no law saying you can only be attracted to one person at a time. Nothing wrong with having a few options at your disposal.” She bit into an apple and a feline smile spread across her face. “Do you want to know who I would choose if I cared for men? Now, I think Ransom would—”
“Wynn,” I said flatly, “I’m serious.” My desperation was enough for her to change her demeanor.
She sighed. “Sorry. Serious isn’t my strong suit.”
There was no point in hiding the truth from her. “I spoke with Lev while you were away. He said Drakemore wasn’t happy with how little we’ve collected so far and is threatening to dismiss us from the Protectorate when we return.”
“Ancient Bastard.” She looked out the window. “I just can’t believe you were thrown into this with no training. I mean, if you’re found out, it’s all of our lives. Maybe that’s finally sinking in for Lev, that his life is on the line too.”
“Thanks for your vote of confidence.” I rolled my eyes. “I didn’t really need another reminder that I’m going to get four more people killed, plus myself.”
“You—” She looked at me through squinted eyes. “Oh, yeah. That executioner. Well, he was no great loss anyway.” She shrugged and started preparing another piece of toast.
I stared at her. She had so casually dismissed the tragedy that started this chain of events leading to us sitting here. I tried to respond to her several times, opening my mouth and shutting it again, but only succeeded in making myself look like a fish.
It was such a stark difference in outlook, and it made me wonder about Wynn’s past again. Was there even more she hadn’t revealed yet?
I knew we weren’t supposed to talk about my life before, even in private, but I couldn’t hold it back. Wynn and I were never really good at sticking to that particular rule anyway.
“The executioner is the only reason we’re here. If I hadn’t failed to protect him, I wouldn’t have been sent to the First and I wouldn’t have asked for you to come on this mission with me.”
She blew air through her pursed lips. “You really believe that? The only reason you're here is because you look enough like what people know of Aurora. The Empire would have found a way to force you into this no matter what. I think it was just a happy coincidence for them that they could blame you for that death and use it as an excuse to get you here.” She chewed another bite of toast. “Or I bet they staged the whole incident to make you not question a thing.”
I looked down at my cup of coffee.
Fuck, she was right.
Lev had told me I was the only person in the Empire who could pull off this impersonation.
I would have ended up here no matter what happened that day in the Old Square. Was it convenient timing that I had failed so egregiously the day before that the Imperial Protectorate needed to move me to the First? Or did they need to move me without question?
I had been too guilt-ridden to really reflect on that day before now, the service duty change, the Committee hearing. Now it felt painfully obvious.
Duty with the executioner was almost never just a single Protector. Except that day. The day a Protector who had never done more than observe that duty was moved to it. General Drakemore knew the crowds had been getting worse, and yet I was still sent there alone.
It was not a far step to wonder if some coin had been pressed into a few hands in a poor neighborhood. How much convincing would it take to tell a young boy that he would get to eat tonight if he distracted a Protector who was aiding in taking his father from him?
Wynn looked at me as she took a bite of bacon. “Look who's finally starting to see what could be possible.”
The morning after the free day, Lev was at training with the rest of us for the first time since we’d kissed. He even asked me to pass him a practice sword at one point. I caught him watching me several times that morning, probably as many times as he caught me admiring his muscled body flowing through the movements.
On the walk back inside the castle, Lev came up next to me. “Your form looked really good today, Aurora.” His eyes lingered on me for a moment before he hurried off into the castle. Maybe one part of my plan with Ransom had worked.
When I entered the secret afternoon lesson in Jo’s room, Ameal was sitting at the table with Wynn. I hesitantly moved to take a seat next to Wynn, followed closely by Jo after he locked the door behind me.
“I pulled out this stack of missives for us to go through today,” Jo said, pushing a pile of papers to the center of the table.
I looked between the pile of papers, Jo, and Ameal, until finally Ameal spoke. “Some notes came our way from the guards from other parties…after your very public conversation with the crime lord.” Ameal leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms and glanced at Jo. “It seems you ruffled a few feathers. It was requested that I attend these afternoon sessions to help ensure your safety in the upcoming weeks and aid with some proposed future strategies.”
I guess now Ameal was part of our group of collaborators, possibly unwillingly, but it was very reassuring to know that Jo was willing to risk exposure over my security.
“What did those notes say?” I asked.
Ameal responded with a look that shut my mouth and set me to reading through the letters on the table. The others joined in, grabbing letters and pointing out anything that seemed important.
“What does Committee Authority mean?” I asked.
“Where do you see that?” Jo leaned over my shoulder to look at what I was reading.
“Right here.” I pointed to the page. “It says, ‘The Protectors are getting more aggressive with their Committee Authority each month.’ I never had Committee Authority. Did you?” Jo shook his head and looked at Ameal, who frowned.
“It means,” Wynn said, “Protectors who are stationed away from the Capital or Rangers patrolling areas without duty stations can make judgments on offenders.”
“So they can…” I didn’t even know what that might mean.
“They can see a crime, decide if it was heinous enough to merit punishment and carry out the punishment without consulting anyone else,” Ameal finished for me. “It’s supposed to be used in only the most extreme circumstances. For people who are a danger to others and can’t wait for the monthly caravans to Capital City to be judged by the Committee, but that doesn’t always happen.” By the tone of Ameal’s voice, maybe he was more willing to be here than I initially gave him credit for.
Committee Authority sounded like a power people could easily exploit. Given my recent conversation with Wynn, I was unsettled by the potential abuses. The information compressed my chest and made it hard to focus.
I sat there surrounded by those trying to help me achieve the Emperor’s goals. People who knew about this darker side of the Protectorate, but were forced to serve a cause whether they agreed with it or not. I had known some of the Empire’s policies were less than ideal, but I hadn’t been aware that they were like this.
I couldn’t personally come to terms with all it meant while I needed to complete this mission, but it was information I needed to know to play the role of Aurora. The inability to process it tightened the squeeze in my chest that was a stifling reminder of just one more way I wasn’t fit to be here.
“Now,” Wynn said, “let’s get down to it. We need to make sure you don't fuck up the dinner in a few days like you did that lawn game. Fortunately, you did give us one advantage that day.”
Right, we still had to survive the next few weeks. “I did?”
“Everyone in that room is going to underestimate you,” she said.
Chapter twenty-five
By the dinner that week, we had a plan, and I was prepared to face the other leaders. Wynn, Jo, Ameal, and I had been plotting like the best of them. I was as ready as I could be.
My first course of action was to wear one of the newly altered dresses. I didn’t agree with the seamstress’s claims that these were slight alterations. The sleeveless black dress with a scooped neck that I had been excited to wear, was now a plunging neckline, dipping to expose more of my breasts in a new way. I couldn’t wear this without some sort of undergarment. Or maybe glue. It made me realize the box from the seamstress was more practical than I initially thought. The skirt was tight enough that anything I owned would show through the fabric, so I had to venture into the realm of underwear that didn’t cover my butt cheeks.
Resigned to my fate, I pulled the box down from the high shelf in my dressing chamber and dumped it on the floor. I found the underwear for my butt and a brassiere that allowed the plunge of the neckline. Feeling very foolish and uncomfortable, I put the dress back on and was amazed by the effect. Perhaps I owed some credit to the fashionable folks of Nixia. I had never felt sexier in my life, and this was just a dress to wear to a random dinner, not even the masterpiece I’d be wearing for the final ball.
I pulled down the topmost trunk from my stack, the one I had removed the lining from, and shoved all the other undergarments into it. I would clearly need these more accessible in the future and didn’t want to leave them somewhere a maid might happen upon them. Wynn helped me braid my hair half back and applied a small amount of cosmetics to my face.
I didn’t usually spend too much time on my appearance, but maybe I should. I looked like a different woman. The embodiment of a capable leader. Confident and ready for battle. Wynn gave me a few final words of advice before we headed downstairs. “Everything is ready. Play your part right and we know we’ll get what we need.”
I entered the hall and was pleased to see more than a few heads turn my way. I really hoped it was because I looked glamorous and confident, not because I made a total ass of myself the last time I was with all these people. I found that I was seated next to the head of the table where Queen Elara sat, with Ransom on my other side. Perfect.
“Is this me?” I said to Ransom playfully as I approached my chair, leaning over unnecessarily far in his direction as I took my seat.
“Mother’s tits, Fox,” Ransom muttered as he looked at the view I was providing.
“Tits indeed!” Queen Elara said with a wide smile. “This is why I wanted you here next to me, Aurora. I knew you would be fantastic entertainment with Ransom tonight after the lawn games.” Queen Elara grinned at me then Ransom. I beamed at her as I situated myself in my chair. I twisted my entire body to Ransom, propping my elbow on the back of my chair to block Queen Elara from our conversation, and pressing my chest forward.
His eyes struggled to stay on my face. That bolstered my spirits that this was going according to plan, and had the intriguing side effect of making me feel sensual and desirable, which was a nice change after being snubbed by Lev.
“So,” I said, “regretting your decision?”
He let out an exasperated breath and turned his back to me to talk to Mira on his other side. I pressed my goblet to my lips and pretended to take a sip of my wine as I suppressed a grin. That was the second course of action tonight—not get drunk, and keep my head in the moment.
I shifted back to chat with the queens and king about the climate here versus in Moriale. Since my lessons with Jo, I didn’t feel intimidated by conversation focused on a simple topic such as the weather in a place I’d never lived. They had prepared me well to describe what life was like in the East on the day-to-day. When the conversation moved to more historical aspects around the architecture there, I was grateful for my lessons with Lev too.
