Seeking Two Lovers, page 27
There was no need to check on her during the night, she’d told us with a wink.
But her face…the bruising on her arms clearly defined fingers…
Fuck.
I saw red, and the girl wasn’t even my own blood.
Lily had told me while Blaine showed Sarah to her room that our boy had broken down pretty hard when he finally saw his sister. She’d said it had torn her own heart in two and made her even more determined to help both Blaine and Sarah find happier, healthier lives.
I’d assured her with a quick hug and lingering kiss that she’d given Blaine that and so much more. I’d also claimed she’d done the same for me, which earned me another kiss, one that had a bit of spine-tingling heat behind it.
But we’d fallen into bed minutes later, my chub ignored by her and myself.
The sleep had been unbroken, and I hadn’t felt that rested in weeks.
Like usual, I ran through my daily to-do list for the day in my head but within minutes decided to fuck it all off into the wind.
I wanted to be home with my two lovers and help in whatever way they needed.
A cell beeped quietly.
Lily stirred and groaned while rolling onto her back, blindly reaching for the phone on the bedside table. She turned the alarm off and rubbed her eyes. “Shit.” She sat and grabbed her clothes off the floor where she had dropped them the night before.
“Lily?” I questioned quietly.
“Gotta work.” She pouted over her shoulder while pulling her bra into place.
She’d called off the day before to help us get ready for Sarah, and I’d never been so grateful for a woman. Since I hadn’t been able to drive Blaine to the airport due to Mr. Joseph I. Devonshire III demanding an in-person meeting at my office, she’d been by his side.
And I’d found myself fully trusting in her to see to whatever Blaine might need emotionally to make it through the day.
To have to sit and listen to that rich asshole feign politeness—it had sickened me. I hadn’t been able to wait to get home to my lovers who held no such pretenses or bullshit and would soothe rather than aggravate me.
“Will you come back tonight?” I asked Lily, Blaine still dead to the world between us.
“I…I think I’ll stay home with Haley.” Lily stood and pulled her jeans on. “He and his sister are going to need some alone time, and I’m not going to impose.”
“Maybe we could all go down to the beach behind the house tomorrow?” I suggested, not ready for her to just disappear for a few days while Sarah settled in. I had needs too, damnit.
Fuck, I can be a real selfish asshole sometimes.
“Would you mind if I bring Haley along?” Lily asked while slipping her sandals on.
“Of course not.”
She rounded the bed and dropped a kiss on my lips. “I’ll call an Uber and see myself out.”
“I’ll get up and make you some tea at least.”
Lily pressed on my shoulder to keep me in place. “You stay right there and keep our boy warm and happy, okay?”
“My pleasure.” I winked while relaxing once more, and pink flushed her cheeks. “Do you require evidence of him being fully sated and resting this evening?”
“Is that a trick question?” Her dark eyes twinkled down at me, her golden hair cascading around my head. Another quick kiss, and she pulled back. “Tomorrow?”
I nodded, afraid if I opened my mouth that I would blurt out those three little words that shouldn’t be said after a few weeks of meeting someone.
Lily fluttered her fingers once at our bedroom door, disappearing a second later.
A heavy sigh settled me back onto my pillow, and I gently tucked an arm around Blaine who didn’t so much as twitch.
I sat in my home office later that afternoon, Blaine and Sarah ensconced in her bedroom. Neither of them had woken until close to lunchtime, and after I fed them and shooed them off together, I’d gotten some work done since I’d missed most of Friday at the office.
Once I combed through my emails and took care of shit that couldn’t wait for Monday, I called up Higgins.
We spoke briefly about Sarah’s safe arrival, but he got straight to business afterward. I’d told Sarah that even though she had no wishes to press charges, I was sending my PI to her hospital room to document what had happened.
She hadn’t been averse to my suggestion of simply speaking with Higgins, thank fuck.
“I snapped dozens of pictures and eventually got her to talk about the attack,” he told me. “Quell is one sick fuck, and I’m going to enjoy watching him get taken down.”
“What’s the latest?” I stood at my home office’s window overlooking the Pacific while Higgins filled me in.
The FBI agent he’d been in close contact with had wanted to talk to Sarah—and wasn’t too pleased she’d fled across the country. But she’d given her agreement to Higgins to stand as witness when the time came.
The case against Quell and the cult sped forward at a vicious pace. While there was more than enough evidence for a peaceful search warrant of the compound, there had been other intel coming in for months about Quell prepping for an apocalypse that would bring a “new dawn.”
Higgins had spoken with the couple who had escaped earlier in the week and then he’d contacted his FBI friend about them as well.
It seemed Quell’s teachings the previous couple of years had tended toward suspicion of government, and it had been rumored he’d built a supply of weaponry—which the couple confirmed.
With another possible Waco situation in its infancy stage, I expected the FBI wouldn’t waste their time—hoped—they would go sneaking in like a thief in the night, shutting the cult down and hauling Quell off in cuffs before anyone knew what happened.
Higgins’s contact hadn’t shared details about the when, but he did promise sooner than later.
Blaine and Sarah eventually joined me in the living room, and they both once more appeared exhausted, eyes red-rimmed and faces haggard.
We ordered Chinese for dinner at Sarah’s request and stuffed ourselves full.
Sarah crawled back into bed within an hour, agreeing to spend the following day at the beach to relax and soak up some sunshine in her newfound freedom.
Blaine slumped against me on the couch, and I wrapped an arm around him, holding him close.
I wasn’t about to share Higgins’s update with Blaine. Fuck knew he had enough to think about.
“Want to talk?” I asked, and he let out a sigh.
“Not really.”
“Okay.” I kissed the top of his head. “Want to just cuddle in bed?”
“I’ll probably pass out the second I lay down.”
“Do you mind if I snuggle your sexy backside while you sleep?”
He let out a soft chuckle. “Nope.” He popped the P like Lily, and an ache spread over my chest.
I hated that she wasn’t there with us.
“Come on.” I stood and tugged Blaine to his feet.
He shuffled along after me toward our bedroom, and I dimmed the lights for him. We brushed our teeth at the double sink and stripped down to skin before crawling into bed. My pillow smelled like vanilla, and I filled my lungs.
Blaine buried his face in his pillow and did the same.
“Lily,” we both murmured at the same time—and grinned like couple of idiots while scooting close to each other.
“I love her,” Blaine said, watching my eyes carefully in the dimmed lights as he rested in my arms.
“I do too,” I easily admitted.
“Have you told her?”
I shook my head, soothing my hand down his back. “Have you?”
“Yeah. Right before Sarah showed up. I was just so thankful for her being with me. Filled up with emotion and ready to explode.”
“Did she say it back?”
“Yeah.” He smiled lazily, a slow blink of his eyes letting me know he was ready to pass the fuck out.
Seconds later, he snored, and not one ounce of jealousy burned in my gut. I wanted them to love each other. Nothing would make me happier.
Except perhaps hearing Lily tell me the same.
Any harsh grief I’d held onto from Mom’s passing had faded, I realized. Lily had given me help in healing—and I hadn’t even been aware of her weaseling into my heart. I expected some days would be tougher than others, like Mom’s birthday or the anniversary of the accident, but I no longer felt anxious in my bones of their arrival.
Lily would be there with her soft, gentle touch, the light in her eyes, and the soothing affection I craved from a nurturing hand.
I would tell her the truth of my feelings, I decided, since Blaine had taken that leap in vulnerability first.
He’d gotten what he’d wanted in return.
I hoped I would too.
41
Lily
Our outing to the beach below Grey and Blaine’s got cancelled thanks to the FBI showing up at their house on Sunday morning.
The better part of the day had been spent answering questions—or so Grey told me.
I hadn’t spoken to Blaine at all other than a goodnight text on Saturday, then one on Sunday.
Even Grey hadn’t reached out with an actual call, simply texted to give me updates throughout the day.
While I understood the upheaval in the household and the stress and anxiety Sarah had brought into Blaine’s life, I still felt hurt. Ignored. Selfish, perhaps, but I couldn’t talk myself out of my feelings.
Maybe it was just damn PMS creating a worrywart bitch in my head, but I battled negative thoughts non-fucking-stop.
I wasn’t about to poke and intrude into who the hell knew what kind of emotions ran through the house after the FBI dug into Blaine and Sarah’s lives though. I couldn’t even begin to imagine what either of them experienced from having to dredge up shitty memories and recount details they would both rather have burned from their minds.
I told myself to rest in the fact that Blaine had his anchor.
I just wished he’d reached for his sunshine too.
“Quit pouting.”
I flipped Haley off even though I laid on the couch, my head on her thigh for the previous hour of our movie marathon night we’d spent downing Andes candies and chardonnay. “Can’t help it,” I muttered, only slightly buzzed and still tasting chocolate and mint on my tongue. “I hate not knowing what’s going on over there.”
“Probably a lot of stuff that they would rather you not hear about.”
Haley had a point, but it didn’t make me feel any better.
“Once this shit with the cult and its leader calms down, the three of you will be smooth sailing into the sunset.”
I snorted at the strange wording my cousin never used. “Since when, Haley?”
“Just because I’m a jaded bitch doesn’t mean I can’t still be a dreamer at heart.”
I rolled from facing the TV to my back so I could see her face. “It’ll work out for you too.”
She sighed, her focus flitting to the dark sky beyond the curtained window. “A girl can hope.”
A news bulletin cut off the show we’d been watching, and at the mention of Abraham Quell and the cult he led in New Hampshire, I jolted upright.
Fires raged in the background of the rolling video, lighting the night sky.
The FBI had gone in with a warrant.
A short showdown had ended with a few gun wound injuries, but Abraham Quell had been arrested and hauled off.
Uninjured, the fucker.
“Holy shit…holy shit.” My pulse raced, my eyes wide and unblinking on the TV.
While a short list of charges had leaked out to the press, rumors led them to believe much more would come to light in the days ahead.
My hands shook as I grabbed my cell and shot off a text to Grey. Did you know they were raiding the compound tonight?
I chewed the inside of my lip, perched on the edge of the couch while waiting for a reply. It took a long as fuck ten minutes before he got back to me.
Grey: No. Higgins didn’t either.
My fingers flew over the screen. How’s Blaine? Sarah?
Grey: Shocked. Staring at the TV.
I wanted to head over there, be by Blaine’s side if he needed me. Grey didn’t suggest it. In fact, he didn’t text again while I took to pacing across our living room.
“What the fuck should I do?” I asked Haley, swiping my screen to life every time it blackened out while I strode one way then the other, chewing on my fingernails.
She’d turned on a new station and watched the same video recording over and over while the broadcasters speculated on what went down and why.
There were reports of Quell’s second wife being treated for a miscarriage at the hospital. Rumors she’d disappeared in a private jet. Guns had supposedly been stockpiled. Over a dozen people had been taken into custody.
“If Blaine wants you there, he’ll call you.”
I took to nibbling on the inside of my lip. “What if he doesn’t?” I whispered, swiping my finger over the cell’s black screen.
Nothing.
Swallowing hard didn’t ease the tightness in my throat and chest.
“Imagine what he’s going through right now. How badly his sister’s mental health is occupying his mind.”
I had told him to be strong for her… He would put his needs aside to comfort her without doubt.
I sank onto the edge of the couch, my knee bouncing. “I’m going to text him.”
Me: I know you’re being brave for Sarah right now, and I just wanted you to know that I’m here for you. Tonight, tomorrow, next week…whenever you need me.
His reply came through almost immediately.
Mr. Yummy: I love you.
A sob choked out of me. Love you too—so damn much.
Mr. Yummy: The emotions over here right now are out of control. While I want you here with me so much it hurts, Sarah’s my focus right now.
Exactly as Haley had stated, the smart-assed bitch.
Me: Please allow Grey to help carry your burdens. Don’t feel as though you have to handle everything on your own. Emotions included.
Mr. Yummy: I will. Promise.
A shuddered sigh fled my lungs, and I sank back into the couch, handing over my cell to Haley to catch up so I wouldn’t have to speak.
She didn’t say anything, and I took back up my station on her thigh, staring at the TV, desperate for any bit of news I could get.
Three agonizing days passed.
Work sucked.
I didn’t get to see my two lovers, but we’d been texting on and off throughout our time apart—always in the group chat.
Both Blaine and Sarah had been sat down and questioned again by the FBI, dealt with follow-up and more bullshit.
I was clueless, but the media gained additional insight every hour that passed, it seemed.
Illegal guns had been found on the compound—thanks to Quell’s right hand man spilling his guts in hopes of leniency. An inside leak had informed the press, and the shit hit the fan.
Child molestation and rape.
Physical abuse.
Murder.
Bodies dug up from a corner of the property, autopsies on order to identify who they were.
But Quell’s man? He claimed he knew each and every one—by name, and he spilled that shit too.
Again, I clutched my cell in my hand, desperate to talk to Blaine. His parents had disappeared without warning, without a word to Sarah all because there had been an altercation with Quell, and I feared the worst.
The phone rang a heartbeat before I could put through the call.
Grey.
“What the fuck?” I whispered in greeting, hoping up to paced behind my couch while Haley sat on its edge. Both our gazes glued to the TV.
I could hear sobs in the background.
“He killed them,” Grey bit out.
I clenched my teeth as my eyelids slammed shut. My feet stumbled to a stop.
Oh God.
Imagining Blaine and his sister’s heartache, hearing their sorrow beyond Grey ripped grief through my chest. Grey knew their emotions to some extent, and I couldn’t begin to wonder over how he held up.
“It’ll take some time to identify the remains of the bodies they exhumed, but I have no fucking doubt.” He stated each word like a curse with barely controlled rage. “I’m going to fucking rip his goddamn guts out!”
So anger, not reliving his own grief.
“Grey.” I swallowed hard, seeing him in my mind, pacing as I’d been doing, his heart broken and bleeding for Blaine. “You have to stay calm. He needs his anchor. Breathe. Count to a hundred if it’ll help, but you’ve got to cool down.”
“Fuck, Lily.” His voice broke. “I can’t even right now.”
“Yes, you can.” I straightened, stiffening my spine for him even as tears of empathy stung my eyes. “You can’t lose your shit when you’re his rock. You and I can break down together later then kiss and make everything better, okay?”
“I love you,” Grey choked out the words, and my eyes welled at the pain and longing in his voice.
“I love you too,” I barely managed to whisper through a happy sob that wanted to release coursing tears down my cheeks. What a fucked-up time for exchanging those three words, but when had anything in my life come to pass by conventional means?
“I-I needed you. That’s why I called.”
Aaaaand the dam broke, wetness dripping from my chin.
“I’m his anchor,” Grey continued when I couldn’t speak, “but I’m starting to feel like you’re my emotional gas tank, my GPS to navigate the softer side of me I’ve denied myself for too damn long.”
I laughed through my tears, and Grey even chuckled. “It’s okay to be needy,” I said through my tears, feeling a shit ton better since he’d called.
“You’ve got it down to an art.”
A huff escaped me as I wiped my arm across my eyes. “You love when I’m begging for all your attention.”
“Fuck yeah, I do.”
