Safe with Me, page 17
Her brows rose as she stopped in front of me.
I pressed two hands over my rounded belly. “Meet Havi Junior.”
Her eyes lit with laughter even as her lips pressed together in a frown. “I don’t know who you’ve been messin’ around with, but that’s certainly not mine. I’ve been a little low on sperm lately.”
“I’m so sorry you had to find out this way.” I played along with her little charade, patting my belly with one hand.
She shook her head with mock sadness. “And here I thought you were the marrying kind.”
I faked a gasp. “I still am. It was just one mistake!”
Laughter burst from her lips and she reached down, picking me up in one swoop. I let out a squeal at the unexpected move, arms instinctively wrapping around her neck to anchor myself to her.
My heart was thudding so fast in my chest.
“Which way’s the pool?”
“End of the hallway, up two flights of stairs. I can walk, Havi. You need to be careful of your arm!”
“I’ve got you, angel,” she said, pressing a kiss to my temple.
“As your physician, I should warn you this is inadvisable.”
“Duly noted,” she said and walked down the corridor like I weighed absolutely nothing.
She wasn’t even panting as she climbed the stairs.
When the doors to the deck slid open, a breeze blew over our mostly naked skin.
“Aw hell, it’s cold.”
“The pool’s heated,” I said, gesturing to the small rectangle of water, asking the AI to prep the pool.
I extracted two towels from a chute in the corner and placed them on the daybeds.
“Why are there so many doors here?” she asked, pointing to three other identical entrances in a square shape.
“Oh, come over here and I’ll show you.”
She walked across the deck and peered over the side of the glass enclosure. Since we were two floors up, the outline of the penthouse was fully visible.
“There are four entrances to four apartments. From here, you can see the top of the entire penthouse. I’m in the South Wing.” I mapped out the outline. “Fia and Austy are in the North. My brother, Fernand, and his fiancé, Danny, are in the West, and my parents are in the East. We share certain things like the pool, the docking bay, and a formal dining area when everyone’s in town. But right now, we’re alone.”
She blinked. “So you’re rich rich.”
I had to laugh at that. “My parents are. I’m just a medic.”
She ran a hand over her scalp. “Hard not to be intimidated by that.”
“By money?” I scoffed, disagreeing. “There’s more to life than just money.”
She raised a brow at me. “You know the people who say things like that generally have money?”
“It’s my parents’ money—”
“Not yours. I get it. You’re just a lowly medic.”
“Exactly.” I tossed my robe onto a nearby chair. “Are we gonna stand here arguing about this or are we getting in the pool?”
“Can you swim?” she asked.
“Yeah, I learned when I was—”
Before I could say anything further, she picked me up effortlessly and threw me into the deep end. My shriek cut off as I hit the water, and a second later, she followed me in, sending ripples everywhere.
I sputtered, rising to the surface for a gasp of air. Strands of my hair stuck to my face like it was glued on and I had no doubt I looked like some sort of drowned animal.
“Why!” I spat water out of my mouth.
She wiggled her brows. “Why not?”
I wish I could’ve thwacked her but she was too far away so I settled for splashing water on her face.
She dodged me expertly, ducking under the surface. Ugh.
When she resurfaced again, she was barely a foot from me. Her top bun had fallen from the pressure of the water and lay against her shoulder. She reached up and released it, letting her hair fall down her back in a wet slide.
Oh no.
I wasn’t prepared for the flashbacks that image invoked. The only other time I’d seen her hair like that was that night on my sofa, the moment after I’d made her come on my tongue. If I closed my eyes, I could still feel the strong line of her thighs shaking against my cheek as I suckled her clit. I could hear her raspy moans swirling around me as I teased her high up on that peak. I could smell her wetness covering my nose, her taste on my tongue.
“Your eyes always give you away.”
I blinked, trying to refocus on her form in front of me. My brain had clearly taken an expedition elsewhere.
“What?”
She moved closer, the water rippling around her.
“You get this look in your eyes—they go really wide, and then they get glassy. And a second later, your lips part and your breathin’ changes. There’s no doubt what you’re thinking about.”
I snapped my lips shut, sinking my teeth into the bottom like a clasp to keep them closed.
As I watched, a single drop of pool water got caught on her curled lashes and fell across her cheek, catching the sun. A little tendril of desire caught in my stomach, slowly swirling upward, making my breath catch.
“There it is again,” she said, and I realized my makeshift lip clasp hadn’t worked. I snapped them shut again.
She treaded closer. “Are you gonna tell me what you’re thinkin’ about?”
My throat unlocked. “I thought you said the communications class was over?”
She tilted her head. “Let’s call this an extracurricular activity.”
Our bodies touched and I couldn’t hold in my gasp. “You said you already knew—that my eyes gave me away.”
With a hand around my waist, she guided us to the shallow end of the pool, right under a particularly sunny spot.
“There’s a ledge.” I pointed it out for her and she settled on it, pulling me close.
“I’m waitin’,” she said, arms like steel around me so I couldn’t escape.
“Why do you always make me say embarrassing things?”
I couldn’t resist, reaching out to touch a strand of her wet hair.
“It’s not embarrassing, angel. It’s practice. I want us to communicate better, and the more we talk, the easier this—” She pointed between us. “Is gonna be.”
“Okay.” I hesitated for a moment, running my fingers over the shorter hair at the base of her scalp. “When, uh, your bun came undone, I had this image flash through my head from the other night on my sofa, when your hair was all disheveled.”
My voice was just a whisper. “And then I thought about the way you felt under my tongue, the way you tasted. The way you trembled.”
Her hands found the curve of my shoulder, kneading the muscles there, encouraging me without words to go on. The heat in her eyes was a strong motivator and I parted my legs on either side of her thighs, kneeling on the ledge.
“I was so worried I wouldn’t get another chance to taste you again,” I blurted as her palms dug into the hard knot between my shoulder and neck.
“Why did you think that?”
My eyes dipped closed under the pressure of her hands, words tumbling from my mouth without going through the appropriate filters first.
“I thought you might leave like everyone else did, once I told you what was wrong with me. I didn’t even want you to touch me at first because I was too afraid. I don’t trust my body when it comes to sex.”
Her thumbs found a point just under my ear and pressed in, drawing a moan from me. I couldn’t decide if I was relaxed or aroused. How could one be both at the same time?
A liquid whimper left my lips.
“But I need to confess something.”
She encouraged me with a throaty hum.
“I like being touched; I always have. Even though I can’t...you know... I’ve always felt the need to be touched, cuddled, kissed, or even just held. The need would hit me randomly in the middle of a shift and I wouldn’t be able to shake it off.”
“How long has it been since someone held you, angel?”
“Four years, maybe a little less.”
The pressure of her hands moved down my back, awakening places with a dull throb.
“You’re touch starved.”
I made a disagreeing sound even as I arched into her hands. “That’s not a real condition.”
She huffed a laugh. “It’s not something you know here,” she said, tapping lightly against my temple. “But it’s something you feel here.” Her fingers traced over my left breast.
I shivered. I couldn’t help it.
“Havi.” Her name echoed like a soft moan. “Are you sure you can do this? Knowing that I can’t give you the satisfaction of...”
I trailed off as her fingers stilled. “About that—I want to try something with you.”
“Oh yeah? What’s that?”
I wiggled against her grip, wanting her to continue her massage.
“I want you to make yourself come while I watch.”
My eyes popped open, meeting her scorching gaze head-on. She was serious; even if her eyes hadn’t told me so, the tightening of her hands would have.
I could feel my pulse picking up, pounding so loudly in my ears that everything else seemed to fade away, leaving us—two flushed bodies pressed against one another in the warm, flowing water—breathing the same air, wanting the same thing.
My hips twitched on her thighs, but she held me steady, continuing that gentle, slow massage.
“Is this a test?” I asked, subconsciously moving my body along with the flow of her hands.
She was quick to shake her head. “No, angel. A test makes it seem like there’s a pass or fail. That’s not what I want.”
I swallowed as her pupils widened, a clear sign that she was turned on by this. By me. By the idea of me pleasuring myself in front of her.
I quivered.
“What I want,” she continued, “is to watch you stroke your pretty little pussy, hear your hot little moans, and touch you all over while you pleasure yourself. How does that sound?”
“I...” Gods, it was getting hard to form sentences. “O-okay. I think I can do that.”
“Good. Now, how do you usually start when you’re alone?”
“On my back.”
She turned me around, urging me to lean against her with a hand splayed across my middle.
“Is this comfortable?”
I nodded, closing my eyes and tipping my head back on her shoulder. The sun now washed over my face and neck, feeling like a soft, warm blanket against the slight breeze that still swirled around us.
Behind me, Havi took a deep breath and my body followed, releasing any residual nerves that had been building.
Her rough palms ran down my arms in one deliciously long stroke and I sighed at the sensation, a little hum of anticipation vibrating in my throat as I waited for her hands to run back up and squeeze the knots on my shoulder. She repeated the soothing strokes, listening for my verbal cues, her touch so infinitely patient that my body relaxed, floating up a little on the water.
“I got you,” she said, using one hand to pull me back down against her body into the comfortable grooves I fit into, like a puzzle piece sliding into place.
This. This is why it felt so natural to be with her. My body already felt like it knew her—the way she touched me, the way the hard planes of her body melded against my softness. A part of me wondered why I wasn’t embarrassed that she was asking something of me that I usually kept to myself—strictly to myself. How had she broken that particular barrier without drawing even a single blush? Was it the constant, open conversations she wanted us to have? Or the fact that she was still sticking around after the shitshow I caused the other night?
Whatever it was, it was working. I’d never felt closer to another human being, and that was making my body respond in ways I hadn’t thought possible. Muscles I didn’t realize were taut and tense were just puddles now as I basked under the sun and relished her kneading fingers.
“This is nice.” My voice was barely audible over the pleasant hum in my ear as I raised my arm above my head to caress her unbound locks, finding the edge of her jaw and turning her lips toward me.
I’d always thought a backward kiss like this would be an awkward endeavor, but it seemed more intimate somehow. A part of our cheeks brushed against each other just as our lips did, starting a little riotous flare of need in my chest. I could only vaguely hear the sounds I was making, the little words I was whispering between kisses, as she stroked my body endlessly, getting me so used to her touch I was worried I wouldn’t know how to exist without it once we left the pool.
As her tongue dueled with mine, I reached blindly for her palm, pressing it into the peak of my right breast, moaning into her mouth as I ground myself against her. She picked up on the hint quickly, pushing my bikini top to the side and sliding against my hardened peak over and over again until I was clinging to her lips with every upward flick, every downward drag.
“God, the noises you make,” she breathed against me, panting lightly as we parted for air.
Her lips were red now. Pouty. And I reveled in the fact that I’d done that—made them look swollen and beautiful, shimmering under the sun with our mingled juices.
“This drives me wild,” I rasped, leaning forward to run my tongue over the hoop on her bottom lip, then closing over it entirely, sucking it into my mouth and hearing her throat vibrate with a deep hum of appreciation.
Her fingers weren’t idle, now plucking at my hardened peak, the berry-brown nub glistening in the reflection of sunlight in the water.
I couldn’t help but think this was the first time I’d ever done anything in public like this. Well, not exactly public but outside. Somewhere other than a bedroom. Sure, I’d had a few kisses in student bars and hovercraft rides home, but I’d never even thought about being naked under the sun, writhing on someone’s lap, hiccupping for her every little caress.
It was oddly freeing—feeling the fresh breeze ruffling the drying hairs on my face while the sun warmed the half of my chest that was just above the waterline.
I arched my back, trying to get her to tug harder, pinch tighter.
“Goddamn.” The word burst from her lips. “You’re so beautiful, I feel like I can’t breathe.”
I gasped at a particularly hard tug, the very tips of my toes curling. “Good thing I’m a medic, huh?”
Her chest rumbled against my back as she laughed.
Have I ever laughed during sex before? I didn’t think so. When I thought back to all my past sexual encounters, I realized they were tinged with worry and a hint of panic. That couldn’t have been good for my partners. No wonder they constantly chanted at me to “relax.” At the time, I’d never truly understood why, but the more time I spent with Havi, the more I was getting used to my own body—the way it reacted, the way it looked, the way it felt. How had I distanced myself from its needs over the years?
“You’re getting into your head again,” Havi said, her fingers stilling on my breast and moving up to caress my forehead. “Those pesky lines are back on your forehead.”
She swiped her thumb across my brow line and I forced myself to take a deep breath and simply enjoy the warmth of her skin pressing against mine.
“I want to stop thinking, Havi. Will you help me?”
She didn’t respond.
I felt her teeth scrape across my neck before she bit down, sinking into the soft flesh with single-minded purpose. My fingers gripped her hair like a vise, clutching the coarse strands and holding her like an anchor to my body.
“Yesssss,” I hissed, and she deftly tugged off the bikini top, letting it float on the water as both hands found my breasts.
She hadn’t let go of my neck, suckling so sweetly, so hotly, that I quivered against the dual sensations zipping through my body.
“I’m gonna tell you what to do, angel. And you’re gonna do as I say.”
“Oh gods.” I nodded frantically as she pinched. “O-okay, yes. Tell me.”
“Spread your legs.”
My hips twitched at her words and my knees parted of their own accord.
“More,” she growled against my neck. “Wider.”
I spread them a little wider, but my hesitancy only seemed to make her impatient. Her hand left my breast, falling on my knees and splaying them wide apart in the water. The edge of my heel now rested on the ledge, a comforting solid platform under my feet.
“There,” she said. “That’s better. Now run your fingers over your thighs.”
My own touch felt foreign under the water—a little ticklish, yet firm and knowing.
“That’s good, angel.” I shivered under her hot gaze, knowing she was taking in every detail of my every movement.
And then her fingers sunk into the flesh of my thighs, digging in as though she was trying to brand me. I squirmed under the intense pressure, little hiccups leaving my throat and I realized...
I was wet.
I could feel it just under the fabric of my suit, warmer than the water around me.
If I were being honest with myself, sometimes I didn’t even need to be wet in order to come. Just two minutes of pressure against my clit with my little buzzer and I was good to go.
That’s what I want. That’s why I was squirming. I needed some pressure against that pulsing button.
“Haviiii,” I whined.
Her hand moved down toward my crotch and my breath caught.
“Not yet.” There was something stern in her voice, and my body reacted to it, shaking so badly it was causing ripples in the water. My stomach was so tight, clenched as thickly as my nipples. My whole body was on edge as she stroked up and down my legs, from the curve of my knee to my hips. Again and again, like a drug.
