‘It will be fine. She will be fine. I’m sure.’

  ‘Do you think so?’

  He sounded as if he wanted to believe her words – like they were his lifeline. Even though she knew hope could be so futile and hurtful, she couldn’t bring herself to take his away. ‘I spent a great deal of time waiting for news in hospitals years ago. I know how it works. If things were bad, they would have told us.’

  Daemon reached across and put his hand on top of hers, as if he was comforting her instead of Phil. She gave him a questioning look, unable to understand the depths of emotion in his eyes.

  He looked back at Phil and smiled encouragingly. ‘Alexia’s right. Lis has a fighting spirit. She loves you and the baby. She wouldn’t want to leave you. I think that will count in her favour.’

  Phil nodded. ‘She so wants to be a mother.’

  ‘I know. She’s been ferociously protective since she got pregnant. Remember how she went through Nigel when he lit up a cigar while she was in the room?’

  Phil laughed, the sound spilling out of his mouth on a sob. ‘Yeah. She has a mouth on her when she gets angry. I don’t think Nigel’s had a cigar since.’

  ‘You know, I think you’re right.’

  Phil nodded. ‘She will stay with me. She would never forgive herself if she wasn’t there for the baby. She was always talking about the things we would do together as a family and what a good father I’ll make.’ He nodded again, his eyes not quite focusing. ‘She’ll make a fantastic mother. She won’t give up on that. She can’t give up on that.’

  ‘That’s right. She won’t. You just keep thinking about how much she loves you and the baby. She’ll fight to stay with both of you. That much I am sure of.’

  Phil’s eyes focused on Daemon. ‘Thanks Dae. I really needed to hear that.’

  They sat there, mostly in silence, with sporadic flares of conversation breaking into the tension. When Phil got up to pace some time later, Lexi held Daemon’s hand, marvelling at how comfortable that felt, just as she marvelled at how Daemon had handled Phil. There were so many layers to him; she was certain she’d only scratched the surface. She had thought getting to know him better would be a mistake, but now she looked forward to finding out more.

  Craig and Bev arrived and they all waited together.

  Three hours later the surgeon came in looking tired, still dressed in his scrubs. Phil gripped Lexi’s hand, his knuckles turning white as he squeezed.

  The surgeon smiled and Lexi felt the relief gush through Phil and into her before he released her hand and stepped forward. She stood back with Daemon, Craig and Bev, giving Phil the space he needed while he took in what the surgeon said. The operation had gone according to plan and Melissa was responding well; she and the baby would be fine.

  Daemon and Craig let out whoops of relief and turned to hug each other as Phil shook the surgeon’s hand, pumping it enthusiastically. ‘When can I see her?’

  ‘She is still in recovery. We want to get her set up in ICU and then you can go in. Probably still an hour or so away. The nurses will let you know.’ He looked past Phil to the others. ‘I’m afraid I can only let you in to see her at first, Mr Paris. Your friends will have to wait at least until tomorrow.’

  Phil glanced back at them.

  ‘That’s fine,’ Daemon said, walking forward and slinging his arm around Phil’s shoulder to give him a manly, rough hug. ‘She doesn’t need to see us – only you.’

  ‘An hour or so, then,’ the surgeon said with a nod and left them.

  Phil was pulled into a bone-crushing hug with Craig and then another with Daemon before he sank, limp, onto the sofa, a relieved yet still worried expression on his face. Lexi knew how he felt.

  Bev opened the basket beside her. ‘Well, I know nobody felt like food before, but you should eat and drink something. I’ve got sandwiches and bottles of water.’ Opening the basket, she handed them out. Phil was about to refuse, but she angled him a severe look. ‘Do you want to worry Melissa when you collapse beside her bed from lack of food and dehydration? Eat.’ She thrust a sandwich into his hand and a bottle of water. ‘Drink.’

  He nodded, a faint smile on his face as he unwrapped the sandwich and took a bite.

  After a while, Phil’s voice broke the silence. ‘We’re not going to be able to finish the CD now.’

  Daemon nodded. ‘We know. It can wait. Lis and the baby come first.’

  Phil nodded. ‘Thanks mate. You’ve been . . . ’ He blinked the tears away, swallowed. ‘It really means a lot.’ His gaze swung to Lexi. ‘What about you? You can’t sit around waiting for us.’

  She squeezed his hand. ‘Don’t worry. I always have plenty to do. Besides, I’d intended on spending all my time with Cat until working with you guys came up, so I can do that now. And I can start cleaning up the tracks we’ve laid down.’ She smiled at him. ‘So don’t you worry about me. You just think about Melissa and the baby and make sure they’re being taken care of.’

  He jerked forward and put his arms around her, hugging her tightly. She stiffened at first, but then relaxed enough to put her arms around him and pat his back. She noticed Daemon watching her, seeing a strange understanding in his eyes as she struggled to give comfort rather than push away as instinct demanded.

  ‘Thanks, AJ.’ Phil kissed her cheek. ‘You don’t know how special you are. I’m so glad you came into our lives. I hope Dae can persuade you to continue working with us. He’s not the only one who needs you.’

  She ducked her head, embarrassed he’d read more into her and Daemon’s relationship than there was. Daemon didn’t need her. He wanted her. Just as she wanted him. But there was no need. Need spoke of love and caring and forever afters. Need wasn’t something she could allow into her life. Wants, however . . . She was beginning to realise just how much she wanted to give into those.

  Finally, Phil went in to see Melissa. When he came back out an hour later, he still looked pale, but the terrible sorrow and strain had gone from his face. He didn’t smile as he told them that Melissa was being kept in a medically induced coma to help her recovery, so he hadn’t been able to speak to her, but his face brightened when he said, ‘They’ve put a foetal monitor on her stomach to keep an eye on the baby’s heartbeat.’ He rubbed his eyes. ‘It’s so strong. So fast. He’s going to be a little drummer for sure with a steady beat like that.’

  They stayed with him for a while longer, but when a nurse came to tell him they’d put a chair he could sleep in beside Melissa’s bed and that he could stay with her tonight as long as he kept quiet, he turned to them all and insisted they go home.

  Daemon and Craig were reluctant, but Bev managed to talk them into it. ‘You need to have a good night’s sleep – heaven only knows, Phil won’t get one and he’s going to need his mates to be rested and strong for him over the next few days.’

  ‘Bev’s right,’ Lexi agreed.

  They said their goodbyes to Phil and left, Lexi and Daemon peeling away from Bev and Craig to drive back in Daemon’s car together. Alone.

  The air was sharp with the cold and dark of night. Lexi huddled in her coat until the heating began to force the cold away. She stared out at the black sky, the pinpoint of stars scattered across it. So big, so lonely; her heart ached in recognition. For so many years she had felt lost in the vastness. She had disconnected from the world in an attempt to escape from the horrors she could not face. She had learned not to rely too heavily on anyone, to only truly trust herself.

  But tonight she’d found herself envying the ease of relationships between Daemon and his band mates. And to be loved the way Phil loved Melissa . . . It had stolen her breath away. Yet there had been so much pain, too. She’d watched Phil, felt his worry for Melissa, his fear, as if it were her own. She’d experienced so much loss in her life, she didn’t know if she could go through that again for anyone else. It was already bad enough to have Cat and Billy, Bev and Karl to worry over losing.

  The thought of losing the love of her life was simply too terrifying to contemplate.

  At the same time, though, what she’d begun to feel over the last month or so couldn’t be ignored. She didn’t want to ignore it. She glanced sideways at the man sitting next to her in the car. He looked so serious. A frown marred his brow. She wanted to lean over and stroke that frown away. But that sort of thing – wasn’t that what a lover would do?

  Could she be his lover?

  He certainly wanted her to be. And God only knew, she wanted him, too. She’d known it in her dreams ever since meeting him, but it had taken her conscious mind a lot longer to catch up on the truth.

  He made her want things she’d never wanted before. Fear had made her deny him so far – but what was there to be truly afraid of? He couldn’t hurt her unless she let him, and even then she didn’t think he would.

  His life was full – of his music, his friends, his da, his fans. So much to keep him occupied and fulfilled; he wouldn’t want anything from her. There would be no chance that his expectations would be anything more than exploring the desire they felt for each other.

  Simple lust.

  He’d never suggested he felt anything more – and why would he? He had his own baggage and wouldn’t be looking for anything serious. Which meant she could give him her body but not her heart.

  It suited her perfectly. He couldn’t stay here – his career was far too important to him and it took him out to live large in the world. And she couldn’t leave. She didn’t want to. She’d built her life and her business here. Cat was here. She had no room for anything else in her life. She didn’t want it.

  But she did want him.

  Perhaps he was the perfect man to be her first lover.

  She glanced at him again, her skin heating as his gaze met hers briefly before turning back to the road. She clenched her fingers in her lap.

  Perhaps he was right. She should just let go.

  They pulled up in front of the manor.

  ‘Daemon?’

  He turned to look at her. ‘Yes?’

  ‘I know this is probably the wrong time to say this, with your mind on Melissa and Phil. But . . . I want you.’

  Daemon sat there as if speechless.

  She held her breath as silence reigned. Then, suddenly, he turned off the ignition, opened his door, got out of the car, walked around and opened her door. Cool, rose-scented air brushed over her as he held out his hands. Dejection flickered to hope in her chest as he held out his hands and smiled.

  ‘I want you too.’ It was all he said.

  It was enough.

  Taking his hand she got out of the car and led him into the house and upstairs to her bedroom. When she reached for the light he stayed her hand, walking over to turn on the lamp beside the bed. A warm glow spilled into the room, romantic and gentle, making her feel less nervous. That a twenty-nine-year-old woman should be a nervous virgin was absurd, but she was.

  She stood looking at him, her hands playing at the edge of her coat. She swallowed hard. ‘I’ve never —’ she began as he walked toward her, passion heating his eyes.

  He reached out and placed a finger on her lips. ‘Shh. I know.’ He took her hands in his, stopping their nervous plucking, and placed them on his chest. She could feel his heart thundering under her palm. Had she caused that?

  His hands ran down her arms to her shoulders and he tipped her chin up so that her eyes met his.

  She blushed. ‘I don’t know what to do.’

  ‘It’s a first for me, too.’ She looked at him questioningly. He smiled. ‘The first time where the person I’m with matters this much; it feels new.’ He leaned down and pressed his lips against hers, a soft lingering kiss. ‘And exciting.’

  His breath feathered across her face and she breathed in the scent of him. He kissed her again. She opened to him. He took her deeper.

  Her arms twined around his shoulders, her body pressed against his, feeling the whole wiry length of him. He was strong and hard, warm and gentle. She fitted against him, thigh against thigh, stomach against stomach, her breasts sitting in the hollow under the muscles on his chest. She could feel his arousal against her stomach. Warmth nestled deep inside her, liquid and pulsing. She gasped in shock at the rush of damp between her legs. She felt excited and languid at the same time. The feeling was strange and bewildering. She wanted to feel more.

  Daemon’s arms tightened around her as her tongue met his in long, intimate kisses. Her breath shuddered in and out. She wanted to feel him. Hands sought flesh, pulling at his shirt. She whimpered in protest as he pulled away.

  ‘Wait, just wait!’ He leaned his forehead against hers for a moment, gulping in deep breaths. ‘I want this to be so good for you.’ His fingers traced a line down her throat and over her collarbone. She shivered. His hands moved, pushing her coat off her shoulders and on to the floor. He bent and kissed the hollow between shoulder and neck, his tongue flicking over her skin.

  ‘God!’ she gasped, a long ragged sound, head dropping back.

  ‘You taste so good,’ he murmured as he licked up the side of her neck to her ear, taking the lobe in his mouth and sucking.

  She thought she might die. The throb low in her belly tightened as his mouth moved over her chin to her other ear., giving the sensitised lobe equal attention. His hands felt so good on her skin. His knuckles brushed her breasts as he undid the buttons of her shirt. Lights sparked behind her eyes, pulsing in time to the pull of that line of desire that flared to life. He pushed her shirt off her shoulders, fingers grazing along her collarbone and down the bare skin of her arms in a long, slowly, sensuous glide that made that line pull even tighter.

  Reaching up between them, she pushed his jacket off his shoulders. Her hands fumbled on the buttons of his shirt and she felt him smile against her skin. The smile made her bold and she pulled at the front of his shirt, the buttons popping off. She pushed it from his shoulders.

  ‘Alexia!’ he laughed.

  ‘I want to feel you,’ she said, disappointment clouding her voice as her fingers touched the T-shirt he wore underneath.

  ‘Here. Let me help.’ He was still smiling as he grabbed at the T-shirt and ripped it right down the centre. She laughed and her fingers twined with his as she pushed the tatters down his arms.

  She felt him now, hot skin, hard yet smooth like silk. Dark hairs curled lightly in the centre of his chest and ran in a V, disappearing into his jeans. Her eyes followed the trail. She ran her hand down that trail. He sucked in a breath, his muscles jumping and quivering under her hand.

  Finally, she reached her destination, her hand hovering just above the top button of his jeans, just above that bulge she had created. Power and lust pulled at her and she bit her lip with the sweetness of the sensation. Emboldened, her fingers brushed over the bulge. Daemon gasped and surged towards her seeking hand. She looked up at him as she stroked it again.

  His eyes glittered.

  The bulge felt so hot even through the material of his jeans. And so large. She wanted to feel it. To see it. She reached for the button on his jeans.

  He caught her hand and brought it to his lips. ‘Not so fast. You have to catch up first.’

  ‘I am caught up.’

  He smiled and shook his head. ‘Let me show you.’ He bent and kissed her again, this time hotter and wetter and deeper.

  She was drowning.

  She liked it.

  His hands moved over her as if she were precious porcelain and delicate silk. His clever fingers divested her of the rest of her clothing in such a sensual way she didn’t realise she was naked. The glory of her skin sliding against his was too enticing, too right, to bring embarrassment. His mouth was skilful; he could have introduced her to untold pleasures with his lips and tongue alone.

  Then he began to use his hands. His hands, lightly callused and slightly rough against the smoothness of her skin, ran over her in wonderful, erotic glides, as if he were playing his favourite tune. He touched every last inch of skin, whispering hot words of want and need until she thought she would scream from the build-up of tension inside.

  Finally, he lowered her trembling body onto the bed.

  When his weight pressed down on her, she thought she would die from pure pleasure.

  Then he took her higher.

  Where his clever hands went his expert mouth followed. She cried out as his lips moved down her stomach then back up to her breasts, taking a nipple into his mouth, sucking, circling. He pulled back, blew on it, then covered it with his mouth again.

  ‘Oh, God!’ She arched off the bed.

  Smiling up at her, he whispered as he kissed his way across to her other breast, ‘You can call me that if you like, but I prefer Daemon.’

  She laughed.

  His mouth closed over her other nipple and she cried out again. She had never imagined there was a line that went straight from her nipples to her groin. A line that carried pleasure so intense it was almost pain, centred in that tight moist place, tensing, ready to explode.

  He finished with her breasts, and she thought that might be it – that he would enter her now.

  But it seemed Daemon wasn’t close to being done with her.

  He licked and kissed his way down her stomach, the muscles quivering under his gentle touch. She rolled her head from side to side, her body bucking as his fingers slipped into her wet folds, stroking, then parting her.

  She glanced through partially open eyes to see him staring down at her, panting, eyes glazed over with heat and desire.

  ‘So beautiful,’ he whispered. He stroked his thumb over her clitoris.

  ‘Yes! Please!’ she moaned, her voice hoarse with desire. She didn’t know what he was about to do. But she wanted it. When his tongue touched that hot pink nub she came off the bed. Cried out.

  He looked up at her with a satisfied smile.

  He began to lick her and she screamed as the knot inside her coiled, tightened and then exploded. She shook, unable to control the tidal wave as it poured out of her and into him.

  She couldn’t breathe.

  Hot licks of pleasure filled every cell, every fibre. Lights shot behind her eyes and for a long luscious moment she could think of nothing except the hot pulsing pleasure Daemon had created.

 

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