Plat, page 10
“Oh…um, sure.” I couldn’t help but hug her since she seemed completely starstruck.
“Thank you!” Her eyes twinkled and she blew out a breath. “I’m sorry. I’ve just, well, you’re one of my absolute favorites. I saw you four times on that last tour.”
“You did?” Tyler asked. “How did I not know this?”
“You were on tour the whole time,” she replied.
“Anyway, try not to follow her around the house, okay?” he said, trying to give her a stern look, though his eyes glinted with humor.
“Fine, whatever.” She turned back to what she’d been doing. “Those cupcakes you ordered came in and I put them in the fridge. I’m making those egg white bacon muffin things you like for the week, and you need to tell me which nights you’ll be home and if you need dinners.”
“I don’t know my schedule yet,” he said slowly, “but I’ll let you know. Tonight, we’re staying in, so if you wanted to leave us a casserole or something, that would be awesome. Tomorrow, I definitely won’t be here because we’ll be recording.”
“Okay. What kind of casserole?” She looked from Tyler to me.
“I eat everything,” I said automatically. “The only thing I don’t eat is asparagus. Everything else is fine.”
“How about Swedish meatballs in the crockpot?” she asked. “I can leave the noodles and you boil those when you’re ready.”
“Sounds great.” Tyler nodded. “Thanks, Betty.” He took my hand and pulled me out of the room.
“Nice to meet you!” I called over my shoulder.
“See you later!” she called back.
“She’d talk to us all day,” he whispered as we went up the stairs. “And while I love her, I only get one full day alone with you.”
“Wait, we’re going to the bedroom? What happened to the couch and the kitchen counter and all that?” I was teasing him, and he paused to press his lips to mine.
“Later. Unless you want Betty to watch.”
“Definitely not. So, what about right now?”
“Right now, we need to get naked.”
I was eight weeks shy of twenty-six years old and had never spent the day in bed with a man before. We literally went to bed around one in the afternoon and didn’t leave again for hours. There was sex, but mostly there was talking and touching and dreaming out loud. Tyler understood me like no one ever had, and with each passing minute, I realized I was in trouble. How I’d go back to my quiet, sterile life after these last few days of pleasure was a mystery. Tyler was everything I could have ever wanted in a man, but I wasn’t sure I could trust him to help me get away. More than that, if I started something like fighting the conservatorship, would he continue to be there for me once things got complicated?
And things would definitely get complicated if I didn’t go home soon. My father wouldn’t give up control of me that easily, and it would cost tens of thousands of dollars to take him to court. Maybe more. There were provisions in the conservatorship for money for those kinds of things, but I wasn’t worried about paying for it—I was only worried about losing. I had the money, and as a well-known celebrity, it wouldn’t be hard to find an attorney willing to take on my case. I just needed someone who would win.
“Why did you get so serious all of a sudden?” Tyler whispered. It was dark out now, and we’d dozed for a little while, but it wasn’t late.
“How do you know I got serious?” I asked curiously.
“You were all soft and sexy and then you stiffened up, like you were thinking about something bad. Probably about your dad showing up, right?”
I sighed. He knew me so well already it was a little freaky.
“Yeah.”
“Our phones are right here, and Lexi said she would call if your dad showed up or called too many times on the other phone.”
“It’s not that,” I said quietly, running my hand over his chest. “I just…”
“What? Tell me.”
“I don’t want to go home.”
“Today or ever?”
“Ever.”
“Then don’t.”
“It’s not that simple. My father will cut me off, and then I won’t have any money. He’ll come after me, threatening to lock me up and all that, and even though I haven’t done anything wrong, it’ll take a lot to prove it. If they sedate me like they did before I won’t even be able to—”
“Okay, wait, they sedated you?”
Tears filled my eyes. “This is why I’m so scared to go against him. You have no idea what it was like when it all went down. I made a mistake, got high, got arrested, but my father was way scarier than the cops. He bailed me out and immediately drove me to a psych ward. The things they did to me there were far more humiliating than anything they did at the county jail.”
“What did they do to you?” he whispered, his arms tightening to the point it was hurting me.
“Tyler, it’s okay… I’m not there now.”
His grip loosened a little, but he didn’t let go. “Will you tell me about it?”
“If you want to hear it.”
“I do.”
“It’s a terrible story.”
“I can handle it if you’re okay talking about it.”
I was quiet for a little bit, gathering my thoughts. It was hard to talk about, but for some reason, telling Tyler felt okay, like he would somehow take some of those painful memories from me. “They sedated me when I first got there, so I don’t know exactly what happened, but when I finally got my wits about me, I wasn’t wearing anything but a hospital gown. Not even underthings. They’d drugged me so much I lost an entire week. Then they kept me locked up twenty-two hours a day in a padded cell. I got to see a therapist one hour a day and a regular doctor for another hour a day, but the rest of the time, I was alone. I was only allowed to shower every other day, and I couldn’t have any of my normal things, like shampoo or conditioner. It felt worse than prison.”
“Oh, my fucking god.”
“I was there for almost six months. After six weeks, they started letting me see my dad, and he would tell me how my behavior had begun to mirror my mother’s and how sorry he was he hadn’t seen it sooner. That he would take care of me now, and once they found the right medication, I would be okay. He’d make sure of it. And as they gradually allowed me to get my life back with reading and the ability to walk around outside, I actually believed he was doing what was best for me.”
“And now?”
“Now he’s doing what’s best for him. I’m perfectly capable of managing my meds. I know I need to exercise and get enough sleep. I haven’t touched drugs since the night I was arrested. I rarely drink more than a glass or two of wine. I’ve never had another incident, never missed a dose of medication, never dropped the ball at all, but he won’t loosen the reins because he would lose his access to my money and the prestige it gets him. That’s his true motivation. It wasn’t until he started forcing me to do things I didn’t want to do that I realized how manipulative he is. And, of course, stopping me from doing the things I want to do.”
17
Tyler
I couldn’t remember the last time I was as angry as I was when Ariel talked about her time in the mental institution, or whatever the hell they were called. People who were mentally ill weren’t necessarily criminals, and a scared teenage girl who’d made a dumb mistake shouldn’t have been treated that way. My deep-seated need to protect her reared its head with a vengeance. Letting her go back to her shithead of a father felt almost criminal, and as we laid there in the darkness, I couldn’t fathom it. I had to do something, but I didn’t know what. I didn’t understand what bipolar was even though I’d tried to read a little online.
Ariel hadn’t had any weird moods or anything that set off warning signs. We hadn’t known each other long, but I didn’t know what I was looking for either. If our tryst at the club had been some sort of outlandish behavior for her, then half the women I knew were bipolar because a lot of them would have sex with me in a club, in a bathroom…pretty much anywhere I wanted.
“Are you mad?” she whispered after a moment.
“Not at you.”
“I’ve spent a long time learning to hide all my emotions, to be completely obedient. In the beginning, I was scared, thinking that something was horribly wrong with me. But I’ve done a lot of research the last few years, and with the medication I’m on, there’s no reason I can’t live a perfectly normal life. I mean, they say that people who are bipolar have extremes, both high and low, and that’s just not the case with me. I get sad sometimes, because I’m so lonely, but in general, I’m pretty even-tempered. There’s no reason I can’t have some of my life back. Especially my personal life.”
“If you’re ready to fight for your freedom, I’m willing to back you up, no matter what it takes.”
“Oh, Tyler.” She burrowed deeper into my arms, her long hair tickling my skin. “I want to. I’m just so scared.”
“You haven’t known me long enough to completely trust me, but if you’re willing to give it a shot, I promise I won’t abandon you. If you need me to help you get away from him, I’m all in.”
“I don’t even know where to start,” she whispered.
“By finding a really good lawyer.”
“That takes money, and I don’t have access to it, even though I have it.”
“I can lend you—”
“No.” She shifted, lifting up onto her elbow so she could look at me. “We’re talking tens of thousands of dollars to retain someone with enough experience and power to go up against my dad and probably Darren, too.”
“I have more money than I’ll ever spend,” I said softly. “And you can pay it all back when we win.”
“And what if we don’t win?”
“That’s not an option.”
“My dad has Darren to give him credibility and a slew of doctors who are all willing to testify that I’m a danger to myself and to others. And part of my probation was the conservatorship.”
“That has to be over now, though, right? Probation? And anyway, you were a minor.”
“Yes.”
“Look, let me do some research and ask around for the best lawyers who handle this type of thing. If nothing else, we can set up a meeting and discuss your chances. He or she might even have some ideas on what you need to do.”
“If I do something like that, I can’t go home.”
“That’s okay. You can stay here.”
“I barely have a week’s worth of clothes with me, other than the handful of things I bought this morning.”
“You can buy some more before he realizes what you’re up to. Do you have a clothing allowance?”
“Not really. I buy what I want unless it’s something super expensive, like a gown for a formal event, but that’s not the issue here.” She paused. “I also have a Bloomingdale’s credit card that I can max out, and he won’t see the bill for several weeks.”
“Let me think on it, okay? Let’s get up and get something to eat, and I’ll figure something out.”
“Are you sure you want to do this? I mean, help me do this?”
“A thousand percent.” I leaned over and kissed her. “As long as you’re sure you want to do it.”
“I do. I should have done it a long time ago.”
When we got to the studio in the morning, I was still thinking about the previous night’s conversation, but there was excitement in the air that momentarily distracted me. Lexi was practically bouncing on her toes as we walked in.
“Oh my god, you guys!” She was grinning. “What would you think about playing a gig at Club Inferno Thursday night?”
“What’s Club Inferno?” Ariel asked, glancing from Lexi to me.
“It’s a super-secret exclusive sex club,” Lexi said. “One of Zaan’s coaches is part-owner, and Thursday is member appreciation night. They always try to do something special, and Zaan brought it up kind of joking, and then Jamie got excited and said to ask us, so he did, and I think it would be awesome so—”
“Who’s Jamie?” Ariel asked.
“Jamie Teller. One of the assistant coaches on the Sidewinders.
“The club is amazing,” I told her. “And the clientele is exclusive, so I’m assuming the gig would be private and no one would know about it ahead of time, which is kind of perfect for what we’re doing.”
“Exactly.” Lexi nodded enthusiastically.
“It’s a great opportunity to try out some of our harder stuff without record company intervention,” Stu said.
“And though we’re not getting paid, the club will pay for all expenses related to moving our equipment, paying our roadies and such.” Lexi was so excited she could barely contain it.
“We’ve voted yes,” Bash said, “but we’re waiting for your vote too, Ty.”
“Oh, yeah. Hell, yeah.” I glanced at Ariel. “And you could do one song with us if you wanted to.”
“I’d love to,” Ariel said automatically. “I love to sing. Just not on two-year tours playing music I hate.”
“It’s unanimous!” Lexi and Bash high-fived each other.
“If we’re playing live with new songs in three days, we need to rehearse,” Stu said.
“Yup.” Ford got to his feet. “And we’ll need the big stage at some point, too.”
There was a sound stage in the studio for full-scale rehearsals, but it was currently being used by another artist.
“Soul Rocka, the artist using it now, will be done tonight,” Lexi said. “I already asked.
“Then let’s do this.” I walked into the studio and picked up my bass, excitement pumping through me. I loved playing live in a way that was hard to articulate. It was like a drug to me, inspiring me to do better, play better, be better. Having Ariel here gave me a little bit of an edge, because I was happier than I’d been in a long time. It probably had more to do with great sex and the newness of everything, from my relationship with her to the project with Nobody’s Fool, but I wasn’t going to overthink it.
The next few days were a lot of fun. We did a final recording of “Bedroom Lies” and rehearsed several hours a day to get ready for the show at Club Inferno. The rest of the time, Ariel and I did couple things. I hadn’t been part of a couple in a long time and had forgotten how much fun it was. We went out to dinner, cruised up and down the Strip since she’d never done it, and even explored Fremont Street. So far, we hadn’t been recognized out in public, and we’d been cautious about staying in any one place too long. There were so many things I wanted to show her in my adopted hometown, but we had to be careful because even though we weren’t doing anything wrong, she constantly worried about her father finding out.
Other than that, though, we got along so well it was kind of scary. We laughed a lot, and she was funnier than I’d thought she would be. If I’d ever created the perfect woman in my head, it would have been Ariel. My dream woman physically, talented and musically inclined, and Jewish, which didn’t mean that much to me but would go a long way when and if she ever met my parents.
“What should I wear?” she asked, coming out of the bathroom in a short black skirt, red crop top, and red thigh-high stockings. She twirled for me. “Does this outfit work to be on stage with you, or should I go with black jeans and this black bustier Lexi lent me?” She held up the leather bustier and wiggled it.
“I think you look pretty fucking hot right now,” I drawled, stretching out on the bed and raking my eyes over her slowly. “But for a show like ours, I think jeans and leather work better.”
“Okay.” She disappeared into my walk-in closet and came out a minute later in the jeans and bustier.
The tight leather forced the swell of her breasts up and on display, and I had a crazy moment of jealousy as I imagined the men at a sex club looking at them. Then she smiled and sashayed over to me.
“You look like a man who wants to touch me.”
“All the time.” I snaked out a hand and grabbed her, pulling her on top of me. I lightly kissed her, since she’d just done her makeup for the show, and as a performer myself, I wasn’t selfish enough to mess it up. Her lips were fair game, though, and I toyed with them until her mouth opened and her tongue sought out mine.
“Let’s stay home and do this tonight,” she whispered against my mouth.
I paused, frowning a little. “Babe, you don’t have to perform with us tonight if you’re nervous about the show.”
“I’m not nervous about performing,” she said quietly. “I’m nervous my father will catch me.”
“You’re not doing anything wrong. We’re not getting paid, so you’re not breaking any stipulations of your contract with Whiplash, and since we finished ‘Bedroom Lies’ last night, we have something to give Darren that might make him happy enough to distract your dad.”
“I hope so.” She rested her chin on my chest.
“What can I do?” I asked softly, kissing the top of her head.
“Don’t worry about me. I’ll be okay. I’m a survivor.”
“There’s more to life than just survival.”
“I know.”
“Would you rather stay here and not perform at all?” I asked. “The band will understand.”
“That’s just it,” she said thoughtfully. “I want to perform with you guys. I love everything we’ve done this week, and I’m excited to see how a crowd reacts to the songs. It’s the first time I’ve been excited about a performance in a long time. And it’s all because of you.” She lightly pressed her lips to mine.
“I just want you to be happy,” I said. “And safe.”
“Laying here like this, with you, I’m happier and safer than I’ve been since I was little.”
“You’ll always be safe with me.” I wasn’t sure if I was being romantic or making an epic mistake, but I could never seem to help myself with her.
18
Ariel
By the time we got to Club Inferno, I was starting to get excited, which hadn’t happened before a show in a long time. I hated touring and had even started to hate the music I played, but this was different. It went beyond my relationship with Tyler; he was an important part of it, but mostly it had to do with Nobody’s Fool. I liked all of them and considered them my friends now, and on top of that, I’d started writing two songs for them. They didn’t know it yet, but I loved their music, and it had inspired me to write again. When the time was right, I’d show them to Tyler and see what he thought.
