Circus Save Me, page 18
I don’t moan or complain, I wanted this. I wanted to be able to protect them, if putting up with him shouting at me gets me there, then so be it.
An hour later my arm is like jelly when Blain declares me ‘okay.’ I did throw a knife at him this time. He caught it and winked at me, stupid cocky asshole. Why does my body seem to light up when he is like that?
Jesse and Rex wandered in halfway through. At first, they watched then they started practising themselves. I’m glad me and Jesse got a chance to talk, I would hate to have any distance between us, especially after last night. I catch him watching me a couple of times, and he also catches me watching him. I smile back at him and try to focus on Blain showing me how to hold the knives.
I’m now sitting watching Jesse and Rex when Blain slumps down next to me, his legs outstretched, his thigh touching mine.
“I said you wanted my brothers,” he murmurs, his eyes on them in the ring.
Licking my lips, I try to think of a way to explain, I knew Blain would be the hard one. Hell, sometimes I don’t even think he likes me! Plus, he didn’t say anything earlier which has been bugging me, but I didn’t want to push him. He and I are like fire and wind, when we come together we explode into chaos. It’s not my fault I seem to love that chaos.
“I- erm,” I stutter, and he laughs before turning those intense eyes on me.
“It’s okay. I know you aren’t like, well, what I accused you of being. I see you genuinely care for them.”
Bolstering my bravery, I meet his eyes boldly. “I care for you too.”
He searches my face before he softens, reaching out with one hand he cups my cheek.
“I know, I don’t deserve it, but I know. Just don’t hurt us, Harpy. I don’t think we would survive.”
My eyes close at the heat from his hand, when the pressure disappears they snap open to see he has left. I blink stupidly, being with Blain is like being tied to his board. You never know how close you will get, but the thrill, the fire he ignites in me makes it all worthwhile. But he's wrong, I don’t think I would survive if they hurt me, not the other way around.
I get back to training, this time Rex helps me. He and Tiny take turns throwing things, jumping out and creating different environments until I am breathing heavy and collapse on the floor. Even my power seems tired and when I see boots stop next to me, I groan.
A hand reaches down, and I accept it, my eyes meet Alcide’s as he pulls me up. I have to catch myself on his chest, not that he cares.
“Thank you,” he says quietly, the rest of the tent disappearing like it always seems to when I am around him.
“What for?” I ask breathlessly, I would like to say it is from training but I would be lying.
“You showing them you are pushing yourself, seeing it helps them want to as well. It makes them finally listen to me,” he admits.
“That’s not why I did it, I wanted to be able to protect you all.” My eyes drop to his chest and his finger lifts my chin.
“I know, I see it in your eyes, but look around, Cariñoa. You being in here, you training and letting them help you. It has lit a fire in them, made them want more. Made them not afraid to be more.” My eyes flit around as he talks and I see he is right. “If one little girl can come from the dust and pain and still come out swinging, so can they. Thank you for helping my family realise who they can be.”
My breathing stops and my heart stutters as right there in the middle of the tent as he leans down and gently ghosts his lips over mine.
“You are our reason to fight, Cariñoa.” He pulls back and smiles that breathtaking one at me, making my cheeks heat as he steps back and turns to the others.
“Okay, you have been at this for hours. Let’s take a break before we come back and go again.”
“What, you going to join in?” Blain scoffs, throwing a knife at Rex, who dodges it. His eyes bright orange, and his hand nowhere near Fluffy, who is watching. They are learning, they are changing, and I can’t help but smile at that.
“Yes, I am part of this family. It’s time I realised what I can do as well.” He throws me a smile before striding out of the tent.
“Well shit, looks like Firecracker can teach an old dog new tricks,” Jesse says with a laugh as we all follow after our ringmaster.
We decide to go to town for dinner, seeing as though we are nearly out of food and deserve a break from everything. Everyone is in high spirits and even Blain joins in with us, laughing and joking.
We decide to eat at the pub on the outskirts of town. We take up a big table in the corner, still laughing and teasing between ourselves. We get a few dirty looks but everyone else seems to be unbothered by us and the pub isn’t full during the day.
I’m sitting between Jesse and Blain and when a girl, yes girl, just a bit older than me, walks to our table and I see her mouth drop open as she takes in all the guys. I narrow mine on her as she licks her lips and her eyes light up with appreciation. She’s pretty, annoyingly so. Her eyes are bright emerald green and her hair a beautiful shade of blonde that hangs around her shoulders in loose waves. Her lips are pink and plump and her body is curvaceous. She has a small scar running through her eyebrow and one along her jawline, but it only adds to her beauty.
“What can I get you, gentlemen?” She purrs, and I can tell that is her natural voice which makes me hate her that much more, her eyes locked on Jesse.
Jesse smiles at her, but it’s not as amazing as the one he directs at me. Even so, jealousy rears its ugly head.
He turns to me, his smile turning wicked when he sees my narrowed eyes. “What do you want, Firecracker?”
I sit stiffly in my chair as her gaze moves to me, eyes widening in shock. I can understand why she didn’t see me before. Hell, I don’t even blame her with all the hotness at this table.
“Ree-ree?” She gasps, her pen and paper dropping to the floor.
I stop breathing as I stare at her. No one calls me that, not since-
“Lily, Liliana?”
Tears fill her eyes as she wraps her arms around herself. “It’s you, it’s really you.”
I can see the others looking confused at me, but I ignore them as I push my chair back and rush to her side. With a cry, we fling ourselves in each other’s arms. Talking over each other as we laugh and cry.
“I thought you were dead!” I shout.
“I nearly was, god they wouldn’t let me come back for you.”
“You-
“-okay?”
We both laugh and pull back.
“Lils, everything okay baby girl?” A big burly man calls from behind the bar. His beard is long and brown and his brown hair fades into it. His eyes are a piercing blue and he’s as big as Nixon. He looks like a bear.
“Yes, everything is perfect. Yavin, this is Ree-ree,” she calls, swiping at the tears falling down her face. I watch his eyes fill with shock before they swivel to me. Another tall man rounds the bar, his long blonde hair tied back, and brown eyes filled with mischief.
“Yav, I was…” He cocks his eyebrow before looking at Lils. His eyes round in horror as he stumbles back pointing a finger dramatically at her.
“No, nope. Not dealing with your tears again. Last time I ended up naked in a forest with my dick swinging in the wind trying to avoid Yavin’s bear hands. Nope, not today.” He spins on his heel and marches back through the door.
Yavin smiles as Liliana laughs. She looks back at me.
“Let me get you all some drinks and then we can catch up.” I nod as she walks to the man behind the bar, their heads bent together.
She is exactly as I remembered her, a beautiful whirlwind of trouble.
“Wildcat?” Rex calls, my future calling me as my past looks back at me with a smile.
I turn to my family and sit back down in my spot in shock.
“Cariñoa, who is that?” Alcide asks.
“A girl, she- I.” I blow out a breath and try again. “We were together in my first house. We went through everything together until one night she didn’t come back to the slave quarters after serving the master. I looked for her, but she was nowhere to be found. The next day he told me she was dead. I- Frederick bought me that day and I never saw her again. I guess she got out somehow…” Jesse grabs my hand and squeezes and I throw him a watery smile in thanks.
The pub door slams open as two identical men fill the doorway, both large and wide and they look like Frederick’s henchmen in the way they carry themselves. Confident and strong, men who know how to kill someone. They have cold, dark eyes almost black and their hair is cut short. They are handsome but in a terrifying way. They don’t bother looking around before striding across the pub, like they own the place, and going straight to Yavin and Liliana. When they look at her, their faces soften and they turn from terrifying to downright stunning.
“Ahem.” Alcide coughs, making me blush and turn back to my men who are all watching me with varying degrees of amusement.
“Rhea! You have to leave now!” Liliana shouts as she hurries to my side. She grabs my arm and yanks me up. My men all burst into action. Growling and coming to their feet they try to protect me. She throws them a exasperated look before turning to me with panic in her eyes.
“Hunters are in town.” She throws me a meaningful look and I swallow the lump in my throat. Liliana is the only other person besides my men I told about my powers, and only because she saw me use them once.
“We don’t know if we can trust her, she could be leading us into a trap,” Blain adds casually. I throw him a glare.
“I trust her with my life, if she says there are hunters then there are,” I turn back to her as she smiles at me.
She tugs on my hand. “Come on, Yav will take you out the back way and get you out of town.” I nod and follow after her, my men right on my heels. She leads us through the bar to the kitchen. I don’t get a chance to look around as she drags me to a back door where Yavin waits impatiently. Once there she turns to me, tears in her eyes again.
“Be safe, okay? I will find you again.” She smiles sadly as I nod and steps back into the awaiting arms of one of the twins. I square my shoulders and look at Yavin.
“Let's go,” I declare with a nod at him. He smiles at me before looking at Liliana.
“I see why you like her, be safe, I will be back,” his voice is deep and gruff and matches his exterior but the love in his eyes for my friend softens him.
He hurries us outside and through twisting alleyways until we are at the edge of town, back on the road to lead us to the camp.
“I have to get back to my woman, this road will get you away. Stay to the edge, Lils would be sad if you died.” With that, he turns and slips away.
“Come on, let's get back to the camp,” Alcide says before coming towards me and wrapping his arm around my shoulders.
We follow Yavin’s advice and stick to the side of the road but a twig snaps to our right and before we know it, we are surrounded.
The attack is fast and brutal, and I find myself facing off with two men. There are more than ever before, at least fifteen large skilled hunters attacking my men.
Rex throws me a worried look and tries to get to my side to protect me but gets cut off by a large man who throws a punch at him. I don't have time to panic as the two men advance on me.
I refuse to run, I straighten my shoulders and wait for them to get closer. The one on the right rushes forward and I just manage to duck under his punch. Using the movement, I lean down and grab my dagger from my boot. I spring back up and slash at the man who stumbles back with a cut across his chest. He fingers it before scowling at me. They both start to circle me, and I spin trying to keep them in my eyesight. One starts to advance, and I dart forward and stab my knife towards him. He cries as he falls to the ground, blood spreading through his shirt and dripping off him. Another hunter takes his place and I prepare to carry on fighting.
Nixon barrels into them, throwing them both across the road. His back to me as he heaves a breath. I keep my dagger out as I watch the others slip past the attackers and run to us.
“Let's go! There’s too many!” Blain shouts as he runs to my side.
The distraction is all it takes for two men to fling themselves at Nixon. He roars as he tries to fight them off.
“Nixon!” I scream as more men pile onto the furious giant, to the man who holds my heart. His eyes meet mine, filled with determination and acceptance as Blain picks me up and throws me over his shoulder. Tears stream down my face, but I keep my eyes locked on his. I watch them soften for an instant before he cries out and falls to the floor and we turn a corner, so I can’t see him anymore.
I fight against Blain’s hold, desperate to go and help Nixon but his grip is too strong.
“Harpy, will you quit it!” He shouts at me as he hurries after the others.
“Blain, put me down! We have to help Nixon, he is hurt!” I cry out, my voice breaking at the thought of my gentle Nix getting hurt.
The panic at losing him is beginning to rise in the back of my throat and I am struggling to keep my thoughts rational.
“Blain, if you don’t put me down I will make you let me go. I don’t want to hurt you, but we need to help him,” I implore, not understanding why they aren't helping their brother.
Stopping, he pulls me roughly off his shoulder and grabs both my shoulders, making me look at him.
“Rhea, we have to get you out of here. Any one of us would die if it meant that you would be safe,” he tells me harshly and pain flashes through me at the thought.
“But he doesn’t have to die! We can help him!” I insist, my voice getting hysterical as my worry increases.
Blain roars in frustration and shakes me, the worry for his brother clear in his eyes.
“You think I want to leave him? It is killing me that we are leaving without him. It would be suicide to go back right now. We need to go back to the circus. We will come back for him, we look after our own, do you hear me, Harpy?” His stare is burning, and I am forced to nod.
Taking my hand again he turns and runs back towards the circus, me stumbling along behind him, my heart breaking a little more with each step we take away from Nixon. I can’t help but feel we are giving up on him.
We sit in the silent ring of the big top, the atmosphere heavy with worry. Alcide had done a roll-call when we got back to check everyone was accounted for. There was a noticeable pause when he called Nixon's name, but thankfully he is the only one missing. The rest of the performers and crew have retired for the night but Alcide has asked us to stay. We have waited, hoping that Nixon would stumble in through the entrance. This was Nixon after all, our strong man, surely nothing could beat him? But as the hours passed by and there was still no sign of him, the mood descended further.
“We need to go back,” I say, my voice scratchy.
I am not ashamed to say that I’ve been crying. Some might say it makes me look weak, but I don’t think that's the case, even Blain didn’t make a comment.
“She is right,” Blain agrees, shocking me.
The others are nodding and Alcide walks closer, a gleam in his eyes that usually signals he has an idea.
“Okay, let’s get our brother back,” Alcide states.
A shout interrupts what he was going to say next and has us all jumping to our feet. I run towards the sound, the guys close on my heels.
There is a crowd around one of the wagons and I see Esme amongst them. Even she looks upset which worries me. She has seemed quite calm throughout the issues with the hunters, so the fact that she is upset now has fear lining my stomach. I push towards the front of the group, wishing I hadn’t when I see what everyone is looking at.
Dropping to my knees with a cry, I can’t pull my eyes from the side of the wagon. Written on the side in what looks like blood is a message, along with a human hand nailed to the wall of the wagon.
WE KILLED THE GIANT. WHO IS NEXT?
I’m ashamed to say I don’t remember much after that. Someone's warm arms picked me up and carried me through the camp until we were in a tent. I can’t find it in myself to care where we are or who holds me. I’m on someone's lap, being rocked back and forth but when I feel something drip into my hair and dampen my face, that I start to come back to myself. Shame fills me. How selfish can I be? They are just as, if not more, upset than me, this was their brother and here I am taking all the attention. I lift my head, but it seems to take forever until I spot Blain's face. To say I’m shocked is an understatement. I thought it would have been Jesse or Rex, not the surly asshole. When he sees me looking, he wipes his tears and looks at me with red rimmed eyes.
“I’m sorry,” I croak. He frowns at me, a hint of the scowl I am so used to seeing flirting with his lips.
“Why the fuck are you sorry, Harpy?” he demands.
I duck my head, burying it in his shoulder.
“It’s my fault, if I hadn’t been with the circus, if I hadn’t come along…” I hiccup, my tears starting again. Nixon's face flashes in my mind making me cry harder. What we had was new and different, but strong nonetheless. A part of me recognised Nixon and he understood me and my scars like no one else. And now he is gone…
I’ll never get to kiss his lips again. I’ll never feel the safety of his arms or see that little smile.
I grip onto Blain’s shirt as he wraps his arms around me.
“Listen up and listen good Harpy. It is not your fault, it was the hunters who attacked us, and Nixon knew exactly what he was doing. Sitting around here crying isn’t going to change anything,” he growls the last part, but I can hear the pain and suffering in his voice.
I raise my head again, uncaring I look like a mess. “Then what will?”
“We make them pay,” he growls.
The tent flap opens behind me as I watch darkness bloom and overtake Blain’s eyes until they are black and menace vibrates from his body.
“I can’t lose you too,” I whisper. He clenches his jaw before leaning forward and kissing me softly.
