Bittersweet, page 21
Closing her eyes in a stubborn attempt to go back to sleep, she finally realized what day it was. Oh my God, this is it. She gasped as she sat up with a sudden, overwhelming burst of energy.
She jumped out of bed and headed straight into the shower. After drying off she got herself dressed and did her hair and makeup. She was sure she wouldn’t look as good when she finally landed, but if the vision was correct, she would see him for the first time at the airport, so she had to do what she could to at least look decent. Okay, she was more nervous than she had been, ever.
She rolled her luggage downstairs and decided to call Sam. “Just making sure you’re up, and I’m making a fresh pot of coffee if you want some before we leave,” she told her.
Sam laughed. “Sounds good. Just give me five minutes and I’ll be there.”
Her best friend let herself in while Jenna sat at the kitchen table, more anxious than ever to go on their trip.
“Oh my God,” Sam said and laughed at her. “How much coffee did you have?”
It was only her first cup. “Very funny,” Jenna mocked, giving her a smile. “I’m just a big bundle of nerves over here. That’s all.”
“But are you ready?” she asked.
“In more ways than one, Sam, in more ways than one.”
The cab ride to the airport was refreshing, bringing them that much closer to their destination, but the wait at the airport was excruciating. Having to be there hours before they were actually due to board sucked, but it was either twiddle her thumbs there or at home. But at least she knew they weren’t going to be late, and they’d cleared security with no problems.
Then finally after what felt like a lifetime, it came time to board. She received her first international stamp in her passport and couldn’t stop staring at it. As pathetic it felt, that just made everything official.
It’d been a long journey to get where she was, and she worked on calming her nerves with alcoholic beverages aboard, so the flight wasn’t so bad. The drinks relaxed her, and she slept dreamlessly for the first time in a long time for a good portion of the flight.
***
The first thing she did when they got to the terminal was look around, but she couldn’t see him. Of course, it’s just my kind of luck, she thought with disappointment.
Sam could see it in her transparent expression, and she rubbed her arm sympathetically with a smile. “Patience, Jenna. We have weeks to find them.”
Hearing how confident her friend sounded always made her want to laugh. Was she the only one who still doubted herself?
Apparently.
It was more fear than anything else, and it scared her to know that deep down she needed Brady to be there. But he wasn’t.
“You’re right,” she said and took a deep breath. Sam looked just as anxious as she did. Walking arm in arm, they headed toward the baggage claim to retrieve their bags.
“By the way, thanks.” Jenna said, trying to stall a little longer. “I wanted to tell you that, in case I forget to do it later. If it hadn’t been for your push to get us here, God only knows if it would have ever happened. It’s an experience of a lifetime, and I can’t wait to see the beautiful scenery up close and in person.”
“Anytime, hon.” Sam smiled and gave her a hug. “Besides, I love Ireland, so it’s no big deal.” She looked around the airport, and Jenna did the same. “Now if only we could bag us some dream men.” She wiggled her eyebrows.
“If only.”
They had their bags in hand, and it was time to go. Jenna sighed heavily and tried her best to exude confidence despite her lingering doubt.
“Are you ready?” Sam asked, and she reluctantly nodded but took her time to move forward.
“Okay, let’s go.” After taking one last look around, she picked up the pace to a normal speed, and they were on their way.
As they approached the doors, Sam pulled Jenna to a stop. She cleared her throat before speaking and looked at Jenna with hope evident on her face. “Speaking of beautiful scenery.”
Jenna’s eyes widened as Sam nodded to the right, but she couldn’t stop looking at her because she was too afraid to be disappointed already.
“Sam, don’t toy with me,” Jenna warned but then became breathless. “Please?”
“Jenna, I’m not toying, just look.”
Her friend turned her around with force. Although two men were staring at them, they weren’t the right ones. Damn it!
“It’s not them.” Jenna turned around and clutched her chest as that would help calm her heart rate. Her hopes had plummeted, and she was shaking with nerves. “I’m sorry, I really wish it was.”
“It’s okay, honey.” Sam squeezed her hand and then threw an arm around her as they exited. “I saw them looking and had to take a shot. It’s too bad too, because they were hot as hell. But nothing is set in stone, and I’m not giving up. Neither are you, okay? We’ve come too far for that.”
And Jenna knew she was talking about more than their traveling. Sam was talking about the big shitstorm Jenna had been through since the accident, because she was one of the people who’d helped her survive it, and it hadn’t been pretty.
She nodded. “Thanks, Sam. I love that you believe in me so much. You’re totally awesome, babe.” With the wrong airport men forgotten, they hailed a cab and headed for their hotel to start their search and enjoy their vacation time.
Indeed, not everything turned out the way it had the first time Jenna was there. It was hard to believe it had been an illusion when it felt as real then as it did now, but that was life, at least hers anyway, since the car accident. One severe hit on the head and a near-death experience, among other things, and she was blessed with the second sight—or cursed, depending on how you looked at it. Lord knew she could use a few more blessings, but then again, so could everyone.
They were staying at a castle hotel and it was extremely elegant. It had a grand circular staircase in the middle of the lobby made of solid oak, which was surrounded by beautiful tapestries on the walls and against the windows, yet the castle had a homey feel. It was a huge red-brick building with white trim from the grand entrance all the way up to the towers high above. And their rooms—Good God, she felt like a princess. They’d grabbed two single suites a few doors down from each other. Hers was pale, with white walls and purple accents, where Sam’s had golden tones and flowery wallpaper. In the center of Jenna’s room was an enormous king-sized bed with a beautiful purple-and-beige canopy and matching accent pillows and a lush down comforter. To the right of it, a two-seater table overlooked the acres and acres of dreamlike greenery that could be seen through the glass doors that led to a small private terrace. On the other side of the room was her master en suite, where she’d been able to get up close and personal with the claw-foot tub a few times since she’d arrived. There was nothing like dimming the lights after a hard day and soaking in the tub to relieve your everyday stresses. Especially when you didn’t have to worry about your child banging on the door whenever he needed something.
Jayden.
Jenna sighed. She missed her baby like crazy, and with every passing day she was beginning to think they’d made the trip for nothing.
All too soon a week had passed, and still there were no sightings of her Irish dream man, or Sam’s for that matter. They did the sightseeing thing, went to a few pubs and on a couple of tours, including that amazing helicopter tour she’d once imagined, taken a ride in a horse and buggy, and had shopped galore. So much so that she’d had to buy a new carry-on bag for the souvenirs she’d bought for Jayden and her parents.
This morning, Jenna had just finished getting ready to meet Sam to check out a few more shops and have breakfast. She kept her fingers crossed that perhaps today would be the day something—anything—would happen. She’d been so distracted with finding Brady, if truth be told, that she felt she’d missed the enjoyment of most of their activities. Breathe easy, Jenna. Take a deep breath and let it go. If it’s meant to be it’ll happen, and if not you’ll know you at least tried to find him. Have some fun, damn it!
So she forced herself to let go, and did.
“So what would you like to check out next?” Sam asked later that morning. They’d stopped at the Loft for a bite. It was a quaint, cozy little café in the shopping district that had incredibly good food.
“We’re on Grafton, so we might as well do some shopping.” Jenna took a sip of her coffee to help wash down the muffin she’d been eating and smiled as Sam groaned.
“Jesus, those books of yours must be selling like hot cakes. Aren’t you all shopped out yet?”
“I have some savings. Besides, this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, and I guess I just want to bring as much of it back with me as I can. Most of the souvenirs are for Jayden and my family, but they’re for me too. I’m making the dream a reality, and I want it to last. Does that make sense?” She chuckled. “Because I tell you, Sam, I want to make the most of this trip from now on. Life is way too short, and I plan to live it to its full potential. I may not find Brady but damn it, I’m done stressing myself out over it. So let’s throw caution to the wind and have some fun, shopping by day, and a few drinks at another local pub tonight, whatever you want?”
“Well when you put it that way…” Sam winked, threw some Euros on the table to cover their bill, and reached across the table before Jenna could stand to leave. She squeezed her hand. “So you’re stressing, huh?”
“Maybe a little.” She bit her lip nervously and looked out the window before she sighed. “I want this so much I…”
“I know.”
“I suppose you do, and don’t get me wrong, I’m not giving up or anything. I’ve just vowed to have a good time from now on. This whole week I’ve been so distracted with my thoughts that it feels like I’ve let my experiences here so far slip right past me. I’m in love with a man who may or may not exist.” Jenna smiled at her friend, knowing how ridiculous that sounded out loud. “And here we are with no sight of him or his friend for you.”
“Have a little faith, sweetie. If it’s meant to happen, it’ll happen.” Sam shook her head. “Just enjoy yourself.”
“That’s the plan, and I’m done second-guessing everything. So are you ready?” Jenna scrapped back her chair and stood as she waited for Sam to lead the way out. It felt like a whole new beginning once again, only this time with much less stress ahead of her.
The sky was a clear blue filled with big, fluffy white clouds and sunshine. The moment they hit the pavement again, Jenna stopped to take a deep breath. Here goes nothing. With every new day is a brand new beginning. Count your blessings and take advantage of the escape. So buck up, buttercup, this is Ireland. Make the most of it...
After visiting a few local spots, she decided to get Sam a little something as a thank-you for being so supportive and patient, especially over the last few years. So when Sam became distracted in the bookstore they were currently in, she saw an opportunity to make it happen.
“Hey, I’ll meet you back here in ten, okay?”
“What? Why?” Her friend clutched the book she was holding to her chest and looked puzzled.
“Because I already found what I’m looking for in here, and I wanted to check the store across the road.” She held up the bag of books she’d already purchased and smiled.
“You want me to come with?”
“It’s not a big deal.” Jenna shrugged. “Finish up here and meet me over there when you’re ready.”
“Okay, I’ll try not to be too long.” Sam grabbed a few more photography books as though she was rushing.
“Take your time.” Jenna chuckled as she waved. “I’ll see you in a few.”
Blarney’s was a Celtic gift shop that was filled to the brim with everything from your regular tourist tee down to some unique custom jewelry. She lightly traced her fingers along a necklace that caught her eye and thought it’d be the perfect sentiment. It was a sterling-silver chain with a Tree of Life pendant. Better grab it before she meets you here. You don’t want to spoil the surprise. It was a symbol of family pride and earthly and celestial energies combining to form a balance between heaven and earth. And, most importantly, the Tree of Life reminded her of love and grace, an end, and most importantly new beginnings. It was perfect.
“Jaysus, ’tis been a donkey’s years since I been here. Care to help an ol’ bogtrotter out?” The old man winked and Jenna jumped. Her heart beat faster, and she could feel the blood drain from her face as if she were seeing a ghost standing right in front of her. Holy shit!
Familiar blue eyes stared back at her with sudden concern as she lost her balance and had to grasp the display table for support. Eyes she’d been dreaming about, only these didn’t belong to her dream man but to the next best thing…
“Charles?” Jenna gasped, “Is that really you?” Brady’s dad…could it be?
“Cian Charles Connelly at yer service.” He helped to steady her and gave her a hesitant smile. “Ye look a li’l gobsmacked, child.”
“I’m fine, really, thank you.” She blushed. “You just looked a little familiar, but I must have been mistaken. I’m sorry.”
“Stop the lights, whut for?”
“Why don’t we start over?” She held out her hand and stood straighter. “Hello, my name is Jenna Baker. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Cian.”
“Lovely, Jenna.” The old man winked again and softly kissed her hand before releasing her.
She grabbed the necklace for Sam and took a step back. “Now what is it you were asking me to help you out with?”
“I need a gift for me bhean chiele, an I was hopin’ ye’d be able to help an ol’ bodach find somethin’ grand for her.”
Some of the words he spoke escaped her, so she made a guess. “For your wife, then?”
“Aye.”
“Okay, how about these?” She pointed to a pretty pair of earrings locked inside the display cabinet and waited for his reaction. They were platinum Celtic knot drop earrings. According to the tag next to them, the unbroken lines of the knot symbolize eternal life and love. Each earring showcased a quartz drusy stone, which dazzled with the tiny crystals covering it. The earrings also had a secret trinity knot in the back. They were breathtaking. “Any woman would love them, trust me.”
“Well then—” Cian smiled “—looks like I have whut I’m lookin’ for, thank ye.” They chatted quietly as they made their purchases, but not until they were outside did she decided to take the risk of asking him at least one question before he left her. It may be her only chance to make progress.
“So Cian, you wouldn’t happen to have a son by any chance, would you?” The old man seemed pleased she’d asked, and Jenna realized then that he probably thought she was flirting with him. “I mean…”
“’Tis no worry,” he assured her and chuckled. “Me buck is in the USA at the moment. He up and left in a hurry too. Not sure when he’ll be back.”
“I see.” Her shoulders hunched in defeat. Would fate be that cruel to let me come this close to Brady only to miss him? Fickle bitch. “Do you need help with anything else?”
“Nay, but I tell you what, I don’t normally invite bures to the gaff, but there’s somethin’ special about ye, familiar.” He scratched his head before shaking it. “Sarah’d call me a muppet if I did’na ask too. Wer havin’ a pairti for her tomorrow, and I’d be daft to not offer an invite to such a fine thing like yerself.”
“Seriously?”
“Aye, ’t’id be grand if ye were there when she got this. Ye know?” He pointed to the bag with the earrings.
“That would be lovely, and I’d love to meet Sarah. Thank you.” Just then Sam caught up to her. “I’m not alone, though, so would it be all right if I brought my friend along?”
There was an amused sparkle in his eye when Cian nodded and answered, “Aye.” After a wink directed at both women a handshake, he gave them directions to the house, and Jenna watched as he casually walked away.
Chapter Twenty-Four
“Do I look okay?”
“You’re gorgeous, now stop fidgeting.” Sam smiled and held her steady. Jenna had taken extra care to make herself look nice for the party. Cian had looked so familiar that Jenna still held on to the hope that somehow he and his wife might be the link they were hoping for.
“Okay.” Jenna took a deep breath and thought of her conversation with Sam the night before in her hotel room.
“So what’s up with the hunky older guy?”
“I think the happily married older guy might be Brady’s father.”
“Oh as if, Jenna. I wasn’t trying to imply I was interested.” Sam rolled her eyes and threw a pillow at her. “I didn’t mean anything by it.” And then as if she’d just registered the full extent of what Jenna had said, she did a double take and squealed. “He has a son and you think it’s your dream man?”
“But his son is in the US right now.” Her posture slumped a little at the thought. “I honestly don’t know what to think anymore. It’s like finding a needle in a haystack, and all I’ve got in my corner is a little bit of hope and faith I’ll one day find him. Maybe I just need to move on.”
“But you have been moving on, and you’ve been doing it for a while now. So stop stressing and live your life. It’s not going to be the end of the world. We’re giving this a shot, though, okay?”
“You’re right.” She nodded. “Cian was really nice, and I’m sure his wife is just as lovely. We’ll go have some fun and there’ll be nothing to it. Have I told you lately that I love you?” Jenna smirked and reached over to give her friend a big hug. “You’re the sister I’ve always wanted, a great friend, you’ve always been there to listen to me, and you know when to kick me in the ass to keep moving forward.” She chuckled. “So…” She got up to search through her bags. “When we split up earlier, I got you a little something to show my appreciation.”
“Oh wow.” Sam sat up straighter and squealed as Jenna held up the box. “You really didn’t have to, but thanks!”
