Forbidden, page 12
“I wish you had told me sooner, then I would have known what to do,” Imogen replied. She didn’t want to feel helpless like she couldn’t help Grey when he needed it.
“I am sorry, I just never known how to tell people,” Grey replied. It wasn’t something he really spoke about; it was something he had to live with.
“How long have you known?” Imogen had heard about autism; she had never met anyone with the condition though, until now.
“Since I was nineteen. It was a lot easier when I was diagnosed and I understood what was going on.” Grey answered, and he got out of bed. “I need to go and get an envelope for the documents, then I can send them.”
“I will help you,” Imogen said.
*****
One week later:
The room smelt musky and sweet and had an antique feel to it. Books lined the shelf of the back wall, most of which were old and more than likely first editions. Imogen sat in silence on the brown leather chair. Dr Nelson Tyler walked into the room. He was an elderly man in his mid 60’s, with thick white hair and thin-rimmed silver spectaculars.
“Thank you for waiting, Imogen.” Dr Nelson said sitting down at his desk and taking out a file.
“It’s fine,” Imogen said, and she could feel the nerves eating away at her.
“First thing is first no calling me Dr, please call me Nelson. I like to make my patients feel more comfortable.” He spoke with a kind tone, which made Imogen feel more at ease.
“Will do.”
“Right then let us start. What brings you here?” Nelson said opening up the file and taking out a pen from his drawer.
Imogen’s chest was becoming tight, and it was hard for her to say any words.
“It is okay, take a deep breath and take your time,” Nelson said giving Imogen chance to relax.
“I was raped.” Her heart pounded, and her stomach tied in knots because it was not easy to say. “I have no idea who it was because he wore a balaclava. It sent me into shock, and I froze but I wanted to scream and nothing came out. I felt helpless and stupid because I tried to fight back, and I wasn’t strong enough. At night I lay awake and it haunts me. I look like I am doing okay, but I am not. I also keep having dreams, and they keep me awake at night.”
“I am sorry, you have my deepest sympathies.” His tone was sincere. “You were not stupid, and in that situation, the mind can either take on a fight or flight response. Remember it is not your fault, and you should not feel any amount of shame for that. The dreams are they related to the attack?”
“No, they occur in a room.” She paused thinking back to her dreams. “It’s a bedroom, but I can’t tell what colour the walls are, it is too dark. It always ends the same with someone walking in and climbing on the bed.”
“Do you think these dreams may have been triggered by the attack?” Nelson asked and he was trying to see if there was a link between them. Or if they were completely separate.
“Maybe,” Imogen responded, she never had these dreams before so she assumed they were because of the attack.
“Have you spoken to anyone else about this, other than myself?” Nelson said while writing in Imogen’s file.
“Not properly no.” She said looking at the clock on the wall. Even though she had been talking about it, the minutes seemed to drag and she wanted to get out of there.
“It is good you have come to speak to me; because leaving all that bottled up can become disastrous. Please talk to someone you trust about what happened. I do not want you to go home and have to deal with this all yourself. Having support may help you more than you think.” Nelson said thinking about Imogen’s wellbeing.
“I will try,” Imogen said, and she knew it wasn’t going to be easy.
“I will see you again next week.”
******
“Are you okay?” Grey said as soon as Imogen walked through the door.
“I am doing okay,” Imogen said placing her boots down. Even though the counselling session wasn’t long she felt exhausted.
“Do you want me to make you a coffee?” Grey offered as they walked to the kitchen.
“Yes, thank you. What have you been doing with your time?” Imogen said standing behind Grey while he made the coffee.
“I was looking up teaching jobs, but I think nobody will hire me.” He replied. It was still hard to try and focus on something when he was without a job.
“I still feel like this is my fault. If I never flirted with you, you would still have a job.” Imogen said and she was about to touch Grey’s shoulder, but she stopped herself.
“Imogen you can touch my shoulder with a firm hand. It’s when it is touched with a gentle hand that it agitates me. Also, you are not the cause of this, and I will find something else. Stop worrying.” Grey replied, and if it was anyone's fault it was his. But he couldn’t help his feelings.
“Okay understood. I hope you find something soon.” Imogen replied before taking her coffee cup from Grey.
“Same,” he paused and he wanted to ask Imogen about her session, but he wasn’t sure whether or not he should intrude. He asked anyway. “How was your session, was it good to finally be able to talk about it?”
“It was good to finally get it off my chest. It didn’t make it any easier though.” She said nervously looking down at her cup.
“Imogen, I am sorry I wasn’t there for you. I had no idea what to do the night you came home.” It still ate him up inside.
“Grey,” Imogen placed her coffee cup on the counter and placed her hands on his forearms. “You did the right thing that night. You took care of me, you bathed me and you cleaned my wound. I didn’t want to talk that night; I was in shock and I was glad you never tried to talk to me. You did perfect that night.” Imogen held her tears back as she looked at Grey.
“Thank you.” Grey was glad Imogen had put his mind at ease, and he had done something right.
******
The room was soaked in darkness, her body filled with fear and no matter how hard she tried, she had trouble moving. Trouble freeing herself. The bed creaked with each painful stab, and the hand on Imogen’s mouth muffled her screams. Hot tears soaked her cheeks, falling to the pillow below her tangled hair.
The face came into view, and Imogen’s eyes shot open! A piercing and agonising shriek left Imogen. “Grey!”
Chapter 18
Who was it?
The dolour sound coming from Imogen jolts Grey awake. His heart was stuttering in his chest, and he had no idea what was going on. Imogen sat upright in bed, her body shaking with each harrowing sob.
“Imogen?” Grey said his throat tight when he tried to speak.
“I remember Grey, I remember,” Imogen said and her voice sounded like it was suffocating with tears.
“Who was it?” Grey asked swiftly, and he moved closer to Imogen to hold her by the shoulders.
“My brother!” She took a long inhale, and let out another painful scream.
Immediately Grey brought Imogen into his arms, rocking their bodies backwards and forwards. The feelings of anguish and brokenness overtook Imogen, and her Left fist shot out violently attacking the headboard. She remembered every attack, and how it made her feel violated and sick. How she hid in her room cowering in fear waiting for her brother to come in and start his next sick assault. It had started when she was fifteen years old, but it stopped a few months before she left for university. The trauma was so severe her brain locked the memories away, and only now because of the recent rape did they finally become unlocked.
“Imogen, please I don’t know what to do,” Grey said panicking. He watched helplessly as Imogen constantly hit the headboard. He wanted to do something, yet he didn’t know what. He thought touching her might aggravate her more, so decided against it. Now Grey was starting to panic, and he needed to think. He opted for one thing that should hopefully get her attention. “Miss Myers!”
Imogen halted when she heard the loud roar of Grey’s voice. “Why...are...you...calling...me...that?” Imogen’s voice was breathless and she could feel it shaking.
“I had no idea what to do, it was the only thing I could think of for you to stop,” Grey replied and his voice too was breathless from adrenaline.
“I am sorry,” Imogen said softly pushing on Grey’s chest, so she could lay her head down.
Grey brought his arm around Imogen’s waist; her wet eyelids dampened his chest, but he didn’t mind. Imogen needed him for comfort, and he’d try no matter how hard it was. “The rape recently, was that your brother?” He asked.
“Yes,” Imogen replied with a small whisper. It ate her up and she was still in a state of shock. “It started happening when I was fifteen years old. He’d come into my room and...” There was a crack in her voice. “I was afraid to tell my parents or anyone. Before I left, I was so traumatised my brain somehow forgot, until recently. I know it was him that night because that is how he always attacked me in my room. And I just... I just know because it happened so many times.” She stuttered through her painful sobs.
Grey’s veins felt like ice was running through them. The pit of his stomach clenched painful, and vomit began to rise in his throat. Darting off the bed Grey went to vomit into the toilet. Panting and gasping for his breath, at the horrific abuse Imogen just told him.
After splashing cold water on his face Grey climbed back into bed. “Sorry about that.”
“You don’t need to be sorry Grey,” Imogen said once again leaning on his chest.
“You have to report this,” Grey said his heart still pounded and he could hear it in his ears.
“I will. No more staying silent!”
*****
Two months and two days later:
The trial had already been running for two days, and it wasn’t any easier for Imogen. Seeing her brother every day brought back all the bad memories, and it was incredibly painful.
Imogen sat in the gallery with Grey, her hands clasped together nervously on her lap. Grey sensing Imogen’s nervous state placed a comforting hand over hers.
Imogen watched anxiously as Caitlin was being questioned by the defence lawyer, in the witness box. She had already been questioned by the prosecution lawyer.
“When Imogen was younger, did you see any ill behaviour between them?” The defence lawyer asked. The defence lawyer was a middle-aged man about fifty years old. He was stocky, with salt and pepper hair. His name is Harry Phelps, and one of the best defence lawyers in the country.
“They argued as most siblings do,” Caitlin answered, and she fiddled with her hands.
“But you have no proof he ever did anything?” Harry stated.
“I believe the word of my best friend,” Caitlin replied, and she couldn’t believe what kind of questions were being asked.
“Do you have a crush on Scott?” Harry asked and he was trying to use Caitlin’s crush to his advantage.
“Did,” Caitlin replied quietly.
“Please can you speak into the microphone!” Harry said pointing towards the microphone.
“I said I did. After finding out what happened I no longer find him attractive.” Caitlin said, and it made her feel sick just thinking about him.
“I have no more questions, your honour,” Harry said and he returned to his seat.
*****
Imogen placed her toothbrush back in the toothbrush holder, it had been a long day and she was glad to see the back of it.
“What is on your mind?” Grey asked as Imogen got into the bed.
“What if Scott gets away with everything?” There was an almost sorrowful range to her voice. Imogen didn’t want Scott to get away with it. Too many men had gotten a slap on the wrist for raping women, and Imogen found it mortifying that they had got away with it so easily. She didn’t want to stand on the witness stand and tell everyone what happened, only for Scott to get six months at the most.
“There is a huge case against him, I can’t see him getting away with it,” Grey said and he put his arms around Imogen.
“I know, but what If they don’t believe me because I only remembered recently about the rest of the rapes?” Imogen said with a worried tone and she rested her head on Grey’s shoulder.
“Then that would be absolutely foolish for them not to believe you,” Grey said. He felt a sense of pride that Imogen had gone and reported Scott. But seeing Scott in that courtroom, and Imogen crying while Grey held her, Grey wanted to murder him.
“Yes,” Imogen replied because she was too tired to argue with Grey.
“Everything will be okay; I will be there with you,” Grey said and he pressed his lips to Imogen’s.
Imogen brought her hand to the back of Grey’s head, to deepen the kiss. Grey’s kisses always scorched Imogen’s body and mind. They made her feel free and alive, but Imogen still wasn’t ready to go further.
Grey ended the kiss and asked. “Is that enough for now?”
“Yes,” Imogen said still wrecked with guilt for making Grey wait. She wanted to have sex with Grey more than anything, but she was still trying to deal with the trauma.
Grey, he wasn’t the same man he was a few months ago. Back then he didn’t have someone in his life he wanted to keep, protect and be there for always. Grey, he’d wait, no matter what.
****
It was two days later and many witnesses had already spoken out against Scott. Imogen’s parents weren’t there in court, which wasn’t at all surprising to Imogen. Her Dad didn’t care, and her Mum refused to believe her son would ever do the unthinkable. The only person who Imogen had to lean on was Grey, and for that she was thankful.
Right now, on the witness stand getting questioned was Dr Nelson Tyler.
“Imogen said in her statement she had forgotten about the abuse, until the recent attack. Can you please explain to the court how that can happen?” Samantha the prosecution lawyer asked. Samantha was also one of the best lawyers in the country. Her blonde hair was usually worn in a low ponytail, and she wore a black skirt, with a white blouse and black pumps.
“Yes. Imogen suffered such traumatic abuse; her brain forced those memories away. This is also known as dissociation or dissociative amnesia. I believe the therapy she had with me also helped unlock those memories, and as you said the recent attack.” Nelson answered.
“How long can this type of amnesia last?” Samantha asked looking at Nelson, and then at the jury.
“It can last for a few minutes or a lifetime, although that is much rarer,” Nelson replies.
“Did you evaluate Imogen for signs of dissociative amnesia, after she told you about these new memories?” Samantha questioned, she wanted to make sure she had all the information.
“Yes, I did a full evaluation.” He said looking straight at Samantha so she knew he was telling the truth. “I can also send the report if need be.” He added on.
“Thank you. I have no further questions at this time.” Samantha said and proceeded back to her seat.
“Do you have any questions for the witness Mr Phelps?” Judge Mullins asked before they called the next witness.
Harry stood from his seat to address the judge. “I have no questions for the witness at this time, your honour.”
“Very well. Please call the next witness.” Judge Mullins said.
This time Samantha stood. “Yes, I call Grey Thompson to the witness stand.”
Imogen watched as Grey took the witness stand and swore under oath. “Can you please describe in your own words, for the court what happened the night of the attack after Imogen returned home?” Samantha asked.
“Yes,” Grey went on to describe in great detail what happened. How it affected Imogen, how it affected himself. It was hard to say in front of everyone in the courtroom, and Grey had to stop several times. That night would haunt Grey for the rest of his life.
“Thank you,” Samantha gave a small smile. She knew it was hard to give evidence. “I have no more questions, your honour.”
“How well do you know the victim, Mr Thompson?” Harry said walking towards Grey.
“I know Imogen enough to know if she is telling the truth,” Grey answered dryly, he knew what Harry was getting at.
“Isn’t it true that you were Imogen’s Professor, and you embarked on a sexual relationship?” Harry asked and he made the word sexual sound dirty, and wrong.
“What does that have to do with anything?” Grey spoke with irritation. There was one thing Grey hated lawyers who twisted the truth or made the witness feel like they were guilty.
"Isn't it true you had a dispute with Imogen Myers before the night of the attack?” Harry said standing closer to Grey, and Grey felt uncomfortable.
“I assume you read my statement, so you know exactly what happened!” Grey spoke with irritation, and he was starting to get annoyed.
“So, the fault can’t only fall on my client, it falls on you too!” Harry said twisting the words.
“Objection your honour! Mr Phelps is treating the witness like a suspect!” Samantha interrupted.
“Mr Phelps please refrain from asking such questions!” Judge Mullins scolded.
“Yes, your honour. I have no more questions.” Harry said.
****
Three days later:
More witnesses took the stand including Detective Harrison and Detective Graham. Right now, in the witness stand, Imogen was being questioned. Every time she looked at Scott, she felt sick to her stomach, and she wanted to lash out and scream. But she didn’t, she kept her calm because she wanted to share what happened that night. And all the times before.
Imogen went on to give details about that night, it was too hard to speak. Her voice often became tight, which caused her to take longer to tell her version of events. She tried to hold back the tears, but when she saw Scott, it became too difficult. And so many times she wanted to run out, so she didn’t have to see his stupid face staring at her. Instead, she focused on Grey and then Samantha.
