After We Fall, page 4
part #1 of A Dare With Me Series Novel Series
“She kissed me first,” I whispered aloud in the room. “She did.”
You're just trying to make excuses.
It was mutual.
It doesn't really matter.
Who made the first move?
It was incremental.
You met her halfway.
My critical mind taunted me. Fuck me. I bunched the sheets in my fist, squeezing as if I could eliminate the energy coursing through my system. I refused, I absolutely refused, to give in and find my release to the mere moments-old memory of the feel of her lips underneath mine.
As a result, when I woke up the next morning, I was cranky as hell. I'd slept like shit. And I still couldn't stop thinking about Harley.
Resigned, I took care of matters in the shower out of pure desperation. Even though it was safe to say I didn't pray often, I tossed a little prayer to the universe, hoping Harley had already left the house. I didn't like to think of myself as a coward, but I wasn't really up for facing her this early.
After my shower, I leaned forward, checking out the wound on my shoulder in the mirror. It was healing up nicely. Despite her protestations, Harley had done a good job with the butterfly bandages. It was sealed and just sore now. The entire surface of the skin around the cut was bruised. I rolled my shoulder, testing the soreness. I brushed my teeth quickly, then considered shaving as I ran my fingers along the stubble on the side of my jaw. I decided against it when I glanced at my watch because I had just enough time to rush to the lodge and grab breakfast. That would get me to the airport on time for my first flight of the day.
I dressed quickly, letting out a quick sigh when I saw Harley’s bedroom door open and the room empty. She always made her bed. When I jogged downstairs, the house was silent. Cat was gone too.
The air was cool when I stepped outside and jogged from the staff house to the main lodge. The sun was making its brisk climb into the sky, and it wasn't even seven o’clock yet.
A few minutes later, I walked through the back door into the kitchen and was assailed with the aroma of fresh cinnamon rolls. Cat was pulling them out of the oven and smiled over at me. “Your favorite!” she called.
“You know it,” I answered.
I turned to grab a mug out of the cabinet nearby and pour myself some coffee. I felt the hairs rise on my neck as I set the coffee pot back and knew Harley had come in. I steeled myself as I glanced over my shoulder. She was walking through the archway from the front entrance. She paused to say something to her brother, Diego, reminding me with blinding clarity why I never, never, never should have kissed her last night.
Daphne appeared at my side with a fresh cinnamon roll on a small plate. “Just for you,” she offered, her eyes twinkling.
“Ah, personal service. Thank you.”
“Well, the minute I put them on the main table”—she angled her head in the direction of the table in front of the windows where guests were eating—“they'll be gone.”
As soon as she handed the plate to me, she whisked away, buzzing about the kitchen like a little bee. I sat down at the counter, making quick work of the cinnamon roll. When Harley passed by and her eyes caught mine, I nodded in greeting. That was it.
Diego sat down beside me, casting me an easy grin. “Morning. You look like you're in a hurry.”
I finished chewing the last bite of the cinnamon roll and took a swallow of coffee before replying, “I am. I had just enough time to get over here before I beat feet and get out to fly.”
“Oh, that’s right. You've got some early flights this morning. I'm sure I'll see you out there. Fly safe,” he said as I stood.
“You do the same.” I gulped the last of my coffee and called out my goodbyes, thanking Daphne and Cat for breakfast.
I was so busy trying not to look around and collide with Harley’s gaze again that I didn't realize she'd gone into the back hallway to use the bathroom. My hand was on the doorknob of the bathroom when it turned underneath, and she came walking out. I jumped back as if struck by lightning.
“Uh, hey,” I said quickly.
Her eyes searched mine. I thought I saw a hint of uncertainty flickering there.
“Good morning,” she said in a prim and proper tone.
I mumbled a greeting before I rushed past her into the bathroom. It felt like my elbow was on fire where it brushed against her arm. I practically slammed the door shut, then took a deep breath before locking it. Fuck me.
Chapter Seven
Grant
“Hey, Grant,” Layla said in a singsong voice.
Layla had long glossy brown hair and big blue eyes. Layla, who I’d spent more than one night with. Layla, who had no problem with a sort of friends-with-benefits arrangement. Sort of because our friendship was entirely superficial.
“Hey,” I said as I turned, actually hoping I’d experience a little jolt of anticipation at seeing her.
Nothing, fucking nothing. No reaction. Nothing.
When I realized she was waiting expectantly, I added, “I don't usually see you out this way.”
Which was entirely true. My friendship with Layla was limited to the boundaries of seeing her at local bars and, on occasion, spending the night with her. She was fun and easy to be with and had no expectations. There was just one problem now: that very thing that I looked for with her was something I didn't want anymore.
Harley had become too much of a distraction months before that stupid kiss last night.
“I don't usually come out here,” Layla said, “but I have some friends visiting. I told them the perfect thing was one of those flightseeing trips. I wouldn't do it with anybody other than Walker Adventures. Lucky for us, you’re our pilot today.”
Her tone was light and flirty. I managed to smile. “Ah, well, great.”
I glanced over at her friends. They were cut from the same cloth as Layla—cute, friendly, and lightly flirtatious. I sensed Layla had implied our connection might be more than it actually was. She slipped her hand through my elbow, bumping her hip against mine, and even leaned up to press a kiss on my cheek.
None of which I would have had a problem with, except it was awkward. That, and what she offered wasn't something I wanted anymore. Fuck my life.
They were with me for a three-hour flightseeing trip. By the end of it, my nerves were on edge with Layla’s flirting grating on me. I was beyond relieved when I landed back at the small airport in Diamond Creek and the locals scheduled for my next flight were already waiting along with boxes of mail and groceries to deliver.
Skylar's voice came through my headset moments after I landed. “Hey, Grant. We've got some extra groceries. Do you think you have some room?”
I glanced at the list of passengers, then replied, “Sure do.”
“All right. I'll have Dan meet you over there.”
“Perfect.”
Layla smiled up at me, practically batting her eyelashes. She was laying it on thick today. “What are you up to tonight?” she asked.
“It’s staff night out at the lodge,” I replied.
“Oh, what's that?”
“A work meeting.” That wasn’t a complete lie, but it was a misrepresentation. Yes, all the people I worked with would physically be in the same location, but it wasn't required by any stretch.
“Okay. Well, have fun,” she said in a singsong tone that was like fingernails on a chalkboard by this point. “You know where to reach me. Hopefully, we'll see you out sometime this week.”
“Sure. Take care,” I called with a wave as she finally turned to leave.
Chapter Eight
Harley
“Harley?” a woman's voice called.
I stood from the chair in the waiting room at the doctor's office. “Right here,” I called as I hurried toward the reception desk where she was waiting.
She smiled at me. “Hi, I'm Dr. Quinn's medical assistant, Carla.”
“Hi, I’m Harley.”
She gestured to a door beside the desk. “Follow me,” she said as she held it open.
I followed her down a short hallway into an examination room. I liked Carla. She had an easy, comfortable manner to her. A few minutes later, she'd run through all the basics with me. I'd explained that I already knew what was going on with my heart.
“So, your previous doctor didn't prescribe any medication?” She cocked her head to the side, her gaze curious.
“I wanted to try to manage it without medication,” I said, my words halting.
She nodded. “Well, that's definitely an option. How often are you having these episodes?”
I wanted to lie. I really did. “Maybe once a week,” I finally said, forcing myself to be truthful.
She simply nodded and typed something. “Dr. Quinn should be with you in a few minutes,” she said before departing.
I waited alone in the room with anxiety spinning in my chest. None of my family or friends knew I had been diagnosed with a heart condition, supraventricular tachycardia, or SVT. That was a really long way of saying I had an erratic heartbeat, typically extra heartbeats.
Since I was a little girl, I’d experienced times when it felt like my heart went way too fast. Roughly two years ago, I’d passed out at work. Fortunately, I was alone at my desk where I worked for a tech company on graphics.
After the third time something like that happened, I'd finally gone in to see a doctor. They’d had me wear a heart monitor for two weeks and gently recommended I consider medication. My family would freak right out and worry like crazy if they knew anything about this. I didn't want anybody to know. I hated any sign of weakness. It was beyond frustrating that Grant had come in after I’d fainted the other night.
I still thought I had plausible deniability if he mentioned it to Diego. I would just say I had low blood sugar. I thought that was a good line of bullshit. A few minutes later, there was a light knock on the door.
“Come on in,” I called.
The doctor who entered the room was surprisingly handsome with amber hair, eyes to match, and a fit build. He smiled over at me. “Hi, Harley. I'm Dr. Haynes. You can also just call me Quinn.” He tapped his fingertips on his name tag, which read Quinn.
“Dr. Quinn, the medicine man,” I quipped.
He chuckled at that. “You'll see me in the grocery store, so it’s easier to go by first names. Looks like you work out at Walker Adventures.”
I nodded. “Yep. My brother is one of the pilots there, Diego Jackson.”
“Ah, I know Diego. Small world. I go to Gemma’s yoga classes too.”
I smiled. “I love her classes.”
He sat down on a wheeled chair that had a curved desk with a computer screen mounted on it. He tapped a few keys. “So, it looks like your prior doctor diagnosed you with SVT?” I nodded. “Let's cover the basics,” he added.
He checked my heartbeat, my lungs, and so on before returning to his chair. “I appreciate you making sure these records were sent over ahead of time.”
“Sure.”
“What prompted you to come in?” he asked.
“Uh, I had another episode.”
“You're having those about once a week?” he asked.
“Uh-huh.”
His eyes were trained on the computer monitor. “It says here you wanted to see if you could manage this without medication.” His attention lifted to me.
I took a breath. “Yeah. I’d prefer that.”
He nodded before looking back at the computer monitor and then at me. “Based on the monitoring report from before…” He lifted a hand, wiggling it back and forth in the air. “You're on that line.”
“What line?”
“The line where I'd like to recommend medication. I’m concerned that these episodes are occurring weekly. You're young, and I want you to be comfortable with medication before we do that. It looks like this last round of monitoring was from two years ago when you were diagnosed.”
I braced myself for the lecture. When none came, I let out a sharp sigh.
“You can look up at me. I'm not going to lecture you,” he said dryly. “Most people are nervous about going to the doctor and even more so when they have an actual medical issue. SVT is manageable. I want to see what's going on for you now. Are you comfortable wearing a heart monitor again?”
“Of course.”
“Good. I’ll get you set up with one before you leave.”
“You have one here?”
“There are some downsides to being rural, but an upside is when I order things, I keep a small stock so I don't have to send you somewhere else.”
“Well, that's handy.”
He flashed me a grin. “We'll schedule an appointment in two weeks and discuss your options when we get that report back. Sound like a plan?”
I nodded. “That's it?”
“That's it. I'm curious, though. Your records don’t indicate any known family history of cardiac issues.”
I shook my head. “I don’t know of any.”
“Have you ever asked?”
“No.” My cheeks felt hot.
“If you feel comfortable asking, these things are good to know. They help us make informed decisions.”
“I'll ask,” I said quietly.
“You don't have to, but it would definitely be helpful.”
He stood, holding his hand out. “Good to meet you,” he said as I shook his hand. “Hope to see you around town or maybe at a yoga class.”
“Thank you,” I called as he departed the room.
Moments later, I walked quickly to the waiting area. The receptionist smiled up at me. “Carla is getting your monitor ready for you.”
A woman came through the doorway behind the reception desk. She had auburn hair and a lithe build. She smiled at me. “Hey.”
“Hi,” I returned.
“This is Lacey, Quinn's wife,” the receptionist said.
“You don't have to announce it every time I come out. I was just stopping by to print something. My printer broke,” Lacey explained.
The receptionist grinned. “Your printer has been broken for over two months.”
Lacey let out a sigh. “I'll get it fixed, I swear.” She glanced at me. “You look familiar, but I'm not sure why.”
“I moved here just over a year ago. Quinn said he goes to Gemma’s yoga classes. I go to her class in town maybe once a week.”
“Oh, that's probably where I've seen you,” she replied.
“I'm Harley, Harley Jackson. I work out at Walker Adventures and do online stuff for websites, graphic design, that kind of thing.”
“Oh, that's awesome. My sister, Marley, does tech stuff too. Oh, hey, your names rhyme,” she commented.
I laughed. “I actually know Marley. We’ve met a few times. She sends us customers, and we do the same in return.”
“Well, it’s nice to meet you. Wait a sec. Are you Diego’s sister?”
I held a thumb up. “Good guess.”
The receptionist handed Lacey a sheaf of papers as they finished printing. “There you go.”
Lacey disappeared with a smile and a wave. Carla came out front and briefly reviewed how to use the heart monitor. I still wasn't thrilled with this heart situation, but I liked my new doctor. As I began the drive back to Walker Adventures, I tried to think of how to ask anyone in my family about their health history. I had three sisters in Texas and Diego here. They all had opinions. I didn't want anyone to worry.
Chapter Nine
Harley
“Yes!” Cat announced, punching a fist into the air.
Grant leaned back in the cushions as he tossed his cards on the coffee table. “I give up.”
“You do?” I couldn't help but laugh.
Cat had persuaded Grant and me to play cards with her. She said she needed to prepare for card nights since they would happen at some point.
“Is this going to be a weekly thing?” Grant asked.
Cat shrugged. “I was thinking once a month. Is that a problem?”
Grant rolled his eyes. “It's more fun when it's just the guys.”
“Well, you live with two women now, so deal with it,” Cat retorted.
I bit back a laugh. Grant looked up. The second his eyes met mine, heat sizzled through me. I'd been doing a fairly good job, I thought, of avoiding him. I knew it would be weird if I alerted Cat to that avoidance by declining to join them tonight since we lived together. I was relieved when he broke away from my gaze first.
Grabbing my glass of wine, I took a swallow. As a disciplined person, I was determined to get myself over this stupid lust crush. “Lush” was what my friend back in Texas called them.
Three days later
* * *
“What the hell?” I demanded as I slammed the door behind me.
Grant was seated at the kitchen table. He was wearing a T-shirt and sweatpants with his feet propped up on another chair.
I thrust my jacket off my shoulders, hanging it up and kicking my shoes off as I dropped my purse onto the table by the door. “What did you tell Diego?” I walked quickly through the living room into the kitchen.
“I told him I came in and was pretty sure you'd fainted. I also told him I told you to see a doctor.”
“Grrrr,” I muttered. “How could you do that?”
“Harley, I was concerned about you. I didn't realize it was a secret.”
“Well, Diego's freaking out.”
“Well, maybe if you went to the doctor, nobody would be worried. Did you go see the doctor?”
“Yes,” I ground out. I curled my arms around my waist, spinning away and pacing back and forth by the table.
“I’m not sure why you’re upset. I bet you’d say something to Cat, or Flynn, or Nora if you found me passed out,” Grant pointed out.
He was right, but I wasn’t about to let him know that. I threw my hands up in the air, letting them fall. I stomped back over to him, resting my hands on my hips as I glared at him.
