Dashing Devil Omnibus 2: Books 4-6, page 129
“I’m not one of your sisters!” Daisy denied again, her voice tinged with a slight whine. “And I didn’t pour any feelings into anything. I just made dinner, like I do every night. But… hypothetically speaking, of course, what do you mean I’m going about it all wrong?”
“You have to make it important to you, personally, for him to eat.” Hope’s smile got just a bit sadder when she continued. “Boyd was raised in a place where he had meals taken away instead of being forced to eat them. Three square meals is not a learned behavior for my Lord. Losing one or all of those meals was not uncommon when he made a mistake or otherwise failed to achieve perfection. Mix that in with him not requiring sustenance to survive, and he never had to unlearn the habit of food denial being a valid punishment—even if he is just punishing himself.”
“That’s all sorts of messed up,” Daisy tried to scowl through a slightly horrified expression.
“And all sorts of classified,” Boyd grumped, gently bumping his angel with his forehead.
Plenty of such details had slipped out accidentally over the past few months, but that revelation had been downright deliberate. Of course, now that he wasn’t bogged down with the compulsions that made him worry about such things, he understood that his childhood had been a smorgasbord of brainwashing and conditioning techniques. That, more than anything else, was why it was their childhood at the PAC was so heavily classified that they were still having difficulty getting authorization to share it—even with the rest of his team.
“Oops!” Hope smiled sweetly at him.
“Whatever,” Daisy huffed. “The NDA I signed was so binding that I can’t even tell Connor most of what goes on out here. But seriously, that was really messed up.”
Without looking back at the fairy, Hope nodded vehemently.
Said fairy’s narrowed gaze seemed to settle on Hope. “And you all are just going to go along with Boyd carrying that on?”
“Mindy said that it might be best to let him cope on his own for tonight, or at least to give him some time alone before we tried to help. He is an adult, and has been educated on and trained to deal with things like this. Interfering with this process might actually hinder more than help.” Hope explained it as if she was repeating a lesson given by a teacher. “It’s not like he is being grumpy for no reason; he’s processing a tragedy. Even I gave him some alone time before I came over. He needed that time before we all start to dote on him… or expect to be doted on.”
“I’m right here,” Boyd rumbled. “You shouldn’t talk about someone like they aren’t present.”
“Hush, my Lord,” Hope shushed him. “This is important.”
“Oh… well… now I feel bad for trying to make him eat.” Daisy’s iridescent wings fluttered a little more, which lent credence to her contrite droopiness. “Was I being selfish?”
“You shouldn’t feel badly, and I don’t believe you were being selfish.” Hope still hadn’t turned around to look at the fairy, and the playful, amused glimmer had returned to her blue eyes. “I know you’ll deny it, but I can tell you intended to comfort Boyd with the meal you prepared. Comforting him while he processes these things isn’t interfering, so it’s fine. That’s what I’m doing, after all.”
Her wings rustled softly as the angel shrugged her shoulders. “But if you want him to accept your attempt to offer comfort,” she continued, “you have to be honest about it. Otherwise, he won’t accept it, or, at best, he’ll force himself to eat it out of a sense of obligation and not take the joy and comfort you wish him to receive from the experience.”
“But, but—But!” Daisy protested twice in rapid succession then once with more feeling, inserting outrage into the word and throwing her arms wide to add extra emphasis.
Her cheeks turned a bright pink. “I didn’t do anything special like you are implying,” she muttered, “but yeah, I want him to eat it because eating good food makes people feel better. It isn’t because I care or anything!” This last came out almost in a strangled shout.
She blew a raspberry. “It’s just that if Boyd doesn’t eat, he gets cranky, and cranky people have trouble dealing with depression. And if the big dope gets depressed, all of you are going to get depressed and then I’ll just be surrounded by depressed people.” She folded her arms with a huff.
After a moment of this, her frown softened, and she dropped her defensive posture. “I mean, I know a couple of kids died, and that’s really sad and all, so it’s okay to be sad and everything…. It’s not like I’m saying don’t be sad… it’s just…”
“When you make excuses like that, it makes you sound selfish. I would request that you if you don’t want to appear selfish, then please just be honest—with us and with yourself.”
Hope’s smile grew a degree or two warmer as her gorgeous eyes glimmered in amusement. Honestly, despite his sour mood and all of the training he’d had on the topic of guilt and loss, Boyd was having a hard time keeping a straight face. He had to restrain a chuckle at Daisy’s flustered efforts to justify her actions.
Daisy paused, her face picking up a slight flush of embarrassment, her iridescent wings fluttering nervously while her bright swirling eyes went wide. She opened her mouth to retort, but nothing came out and she closed it after a moment.
“Would you like some help?” Hope asked sweetly, her warm smile growing larger as the amusement in her eyes shifted to fondness. “I offer as someone who once had difficulty expressing my feelings and intent clearly.”
Daisy blinked, then replied in an inquisitive tone, “I guess?”
“Try something like this… ehem…” With a soft, reassuring smile, Hope leaned in and gently placed a hand on Boyd’s shoulder. “I know it’s been a tough day for you, and that you may not have much of an appetite,” the angel began softly, “but I made something that I hoped might bring you some comfort. Would you be willing to try just a little? It would mean a lot to me.” Her voice was gentle and kind, like a warm hug on a cold day.
Boyd found he wanted to take at least a bite of whatever she’d prepared, before remembering it was all an act.
“Oh, no! No way in any of the hells am I doing something like that,” Daisy shouted, her wings fluttering rapidly in agitation. “How could he possible not get the wrong idea from that?”
“The wrong idea?” Hope asked with complete innocence.
Daisy’s blush deepened a shade or three as the angel forced her to explain herself. “Y-you know,” she stammered, “l-like sending the wrong m-message. I can’t do that. I can’t flirt like that! Especially not with him!”
Hope’s expression shifted to one of confusion before a slow smile started to form. “Flirting?” she asked, feigning innocence. “Who said anything about flirting? I assure you, that was not my intention. I simply wanted you to be honest as you show some kindness. I was not trying to trick you into flirting with Boyd. Not all kindness is flirting, dear sister.”
She sighed as Daisy growled, “Not your sister!”
“This would be so much easier if you could just be honest,” Hope explained.
Boyd couldn't help the chuckle that escaped at the spectacle before him. With her gentle demeanor, Hope was uniquely suited to tease the fairy woman without sending her flitting off in a huff. But he was starting to feel bad for the poor girl.
“Oh? This is funny to you, is it?” Daisy glared at him.
“I mean, yeah… a little.” Boyd smiled toothily back at the irate fairy, which only served to draw her brows down further. “And I needed a bit of a laugh… so thank you. I’m sorry if it feels like it was at your expense. To make it up to you, I’ll call off the angel and make this easy for you.”
Daisy blinked at him, suddenly confused.
“Did you make me a special dinner because you wanted to help me feel better?” When she took a big breath, obviously in preparation for issuing a denial, Boyd held up a hand to stop her. “Yes or no will suffice.”
“Yes,” she admitted sullenly.
“Thank you very much. Here, let me try a bit… maybe it will wake up my appetite.” Boyd reached over with his tail and grasped the handle at the top of the dome that covered the platter. When he removed it, he blinked at the steam that poured out, carrying on it a rich and savory smell.
The platter was covered in strips of precut steak that looked about as tender and juicy as he could hope for. There were a lot of the little strips, most of which were lightly drizzled in a dark brown sauce that smelled divine. The whole dish glimmered under the light. At the center of the platter was a shallow dish with a thin, red-brown au jus.
This was no square meal or part of a balanced diet. There were no sides or appetizers. Besides the meat and sauce, there was only a fork. It was just a big platter of delicious strips of steak.
Boyd’s mouth began to water, which he managed to hide only by keeping it closed. His stomach gave him away, revealing the effect the sight and its smell had on him by rumbling loudly enough to draw a giggle from Hope.
“He he he he,” she giggled with a musical laugh. “Maybe you should have started by lifting the dome off the platter.”
“Now you tell me,” Daisy grumbled and then sighed dramatically. “It really isn’t anything special. Just something I… ah… that I threw together.”
Despite Daisy’s attempt to downplay it, the aroma alone was tantalizing enough to make have to swallow, lest he drown in drool. Boyd could tell Daisy had put significant effort and care into preparing the meal. And he appreciated the gesture, truly. No matter how much she tried to dismiss it.
With a slight smile tugging at the corners of his lips, Boyd picked up the fork and speared a piece of steak. The meat was cooked to perfection, so tender that the prongs just slid right in. As he sank his teeth into the succulent strip of meat, savory juices burst forth, coating his tongue with a tantalizing blend of rich flavors. The savory, buttery aroma filled his nostrils, tempting him to take another bite.
The taste was exquisite, the flavors dancing on his palate. Boyd closed his eyes, savoring the moment and allowing himself to enjoy the simple pleasure of a morsel of meat cooked to perfection. The tension that had knotted his shoulders began to loosen, replaced by a sense of warmth and contentment that spread through him.
Sometimes it was the simple things that had the greatest impact.
When he opened his eyes again, Boyd found Daisy watching him closely. Her facade of indifference had a wide crack in it, revealing more than a hint of satisfaction at his reaction. She tried to keep up a tough exterior, but the softness in her gaze betrayed her.
Hope beamed at him from his lap, happy to see him find solace in the delicious meal.
“This is delicious Daisy, thank you.” Boyd gave her an honest smile, deciding to temporarily set aside his darker thoughts so he could enjoy the meal. “I do believe I will eat it all, and I’ll make sure to let myself enjoy it.”
Daisy’s cheeks turned a deep red at hearing the genuine gratitude in Boyd’s deep voice. She quickly ducked her head so that her iridescent hair covered her eyes as she averted her gaze.
Softly, she muttered, “You’re welcome.”
Her wings seemed to flutter-twitch before she turned back to him with a glare. “Just eat as much as you can and don’t worry about the dish. I’ll come back to take care of it later.” Suddenly, a soap bubble appeared around her, shrank down to nothing, and she disappeared with a little pop.
Boyd would have chuckled, but he was too busy dipping the next piece of delicious steak into the au jus. He was careful to guide each strip to his mouth without dripping any of the au jus on his beaming angel.
Chapter 18
Boyd had greatly enjoyed his platter of steak and had finished it all. The satisfying meal, combined with a very happy to see him eating angel in his lap, had been enough to keep his mind off his troubles. He decided to head to bed, figuring he would sleep the worst of his guilt away so that he could come at the problem he was having dealing with the outcome of their latest mission with a fresh mind in the morning.
Just as he was about to head up the steps leading away from the Great Room, he sensed the deteriorating mental state of his newly minted Bonded love. The Devoted’s Captain didn’t waste time kicking himself for not being there when Laura needed him. Instead, he excused himself from Hope and went to find her.
‘She’s in the Med Bay,’ Mindy filled him in as Laura’s still forming Bond only gave him a vague direction to follow for her location. ‘She seemed fine at dinner—a little shaky, but coping like the rest of us. She mentioned needing to organize some medical supplies as something that would keep her busy and her mind off what happened.”
Mindy sent him the telepathic equivalent of a sigh. ‘I’m not listening to her thoughts, per her request, but she’s a bit of an emotional beacon at the moment. I don’t know how she is doing with the medical supplies, but it must not have worked.’
Boyd sent his darkest love his thanks and understanding as he spun on his heel and launched into the air, crossing the Great Room in a moment to land in front of the elevators. When he entered the elevator, Boyd selected the stop for the Med Bay. The doors opened a moment later and he strode into the Base’s Medical Clinic, pulling his Bond with Laura wide open.
It didn’t take him long to locate Laura in the partitioned room. A frustrated groan and the clatter of some metal piece hitting the floor made it fairly easy. What he sensed over their Bond was more distinct, though he wouldn’t say the maelstrom of frustration, despair, anger, and self-loathing was any clearer.
“Ugh! It’s supposed to fit right here, that’s what the slot is for! I don’t understand why they changed it on the SB300X, the way they had it on the SB300 worked fine.”
By the time Laura had finished her tirade, the big demon reached the supply nook she was in. She appeared to be trying to set up some sort of large scanner. The focus of her frustration seemed to be a tray attached to one of the arms. It had slots designed to store attachments Boyd couldn’t begin to guess the purpose of. From the sounds of things, the tray for one of those slots had not been particularly well designed.
Laura’s frustration was palpable as Boyd approached, the tension in her shoulders evident even from a distance. He watched silently for a moment, taking in the scene as she struggled with the scanner. She was so focused on her task, that she didn’t notice his arrival.
“Laura?” Boyd’s voice was gentle, trying to break through the cloud of emotions she radiated without startling her.
Laura’s head snapped up at the low rumble, her expression one of surprise and then relief. “Boyd! You’re here,” she said, trying to muster a smile despite the frustration etched in every tight muscle in her neck and shoulders.
“I am,” Boyd replied softly, stepping close. “It seems you’re having some trouble with that scanner.”
Laura blew out a sigh, running a hand through her mussed hair in exasperation. “It’s just not cooperating. I thought I had it figured out, but this tray just won’t slide in properly,” she explained, gesturing to the offending piece of equipment with a frown.
She was wearing a pair of yoga pants and a tank top, which was perfect for his purposes. “Leave it for tonight. It will be easier to deal with tomorrow, and we’ll be off rotation for a couple days anyhow. Come with me.” He nodded away from the alcove.
“Fine,” Laura dropped a multi-wrench tool down on the tray and took a sharp step back. “Where are we going?”
“The training room,” Boyd replied as he began leading her out of the Med Bay. “You need to blow off some steam.”
“I don’t think lifting weights is going to help right now.” She sighed, rubbing at her temples. “I know I shouldn’t be taking my anger out on expensive medical equipment, but the gym won’t help, either.”
“Who said anything about lifting weights?” he rumbled with a grin.
The Med Bay was next to both their gym and a general-purpose training room that they used for sparring. Exiting the Med Bay, the big demon turned towards the training room. “We’ll be sparring… well, you’ll be sparring… sort-of.”
“Sort-of?” Laura’s eyebrows raised as she sped up to walk beside him.
“I’ll give you something to hit,” he explained as they stepped into the open room with its padded floor and walls, still configured for close quarters combat from her earlier sparring with Raev. “You need to hit something more than you need a challenge right now.”
He diverted over to a cabinet that came with the room’s current configuration. It contained all sorts of safety equipment, including punching mitts sized for his massive hands. He selected a pair that were red with black and white targets at the center and slipped them on as he led Laura into the center of the room before turning to face her.
He held up the mitts. “Punch until you are ready to talk, then spill it all out: how you felt about the pain, fear, and defeat training; how you feel about being Enhanced; how you feel about today’s mission; how you feel about losing those kids.”
He studied her, sifting through the kaleidoscope of emotions he sensed across their Bond as he mentioned each difficult topic.
“I know a lot has happened in a very short time—and all those things have been stacked one on top of the other so close that you haven’t had time to process them, let alone deal with the emotions they’ve dredged up.”
Laura stared at Boyd, her eyes wide with a mixture of surprise and uncertainty. He could tell that she had not anticipated being offered this form of release, but his unwavering gaze and the certainty in his voice convinced her. It was what she needed.
