Falling for Her Forbidden Flatmate, page 14
* * *
It wasn’t the universe that unexpectedly offered up the solution the next day. It was Jenni.
Jock was taking one last look around the station platform before his sister climbed into the train carriage. And frowning.
‘Looks like Grace isn’t going to get away from the hospital in time to wave you off.’
‘She texted me. Her patient is getting a bit wound up about the next ultrasound she’s waiting for. I told her not to worry. I’ll call her when I’ve arrived in Melbourne. I’ve had the loveliest time, Jock.’ Jenni threw her arms around her brother and hugged him. Hard. ‘And thank you... You’re doing a great job of looking after Grace. I’m so happy that she’s so happy.’
‘Me too,’ Jock managed. ‘You look after yourself, Jen. Have fun in Melbourne.’
‘I intend to. Have you ever been?’
‘No. I’d love to, though.’
And there it was... The solution.
It was time to move on to a new adventure. A new start. He could get away from any danger of things getting out of control with Grace and either of them getting hurt and he knew he could do it in a way that was kind—he was just doing what he always did, after all, and he was confident that he was good at it.
He was moving on.
Hopefully without leaving any lasting damage to what felt like the most significant friendship he’d ever had. Jock was, without doubt, closer to Grace Collins than he’d ever been to anyone other than his twin sister.
The sister who was delighted with how happy Grace was in her new life and the part Jock had been playing in looking after her best friend.
He just had to continue doing that. And it wouldn’t hurt to keep his fingers crossed and hope the next step would be as easy to find as the first.
It was easy to put the issue aside when he arrived at work, especially as Grace was with the first patient he needed to see. Being in the dim light of the ultrasound room made it easy to focus completely on the screen and the relief of being able to confirm there was no sign of any damage to Maureen’s baby or the placenta made it a good start to his day.
‘The continuous CTG monitoring hasn’t given us any grounds for concern either, Maureen,’ he said. ‘I’m happy to discharge you to go home, but it would be a good idea to take things easy for a day or two.’
‘And call us if you’re worried about anything at all,’ Grace added.
He spotted Grace a short time later, on his way to get a sandwich and coffee from the café for lunch. She was walking with Maureen out of the main doors of the hospital to where a taxi was waiting. He bought an extra sandwich and presented it to Grace as she came back through the reception area.
‘Ham salad on sourdough,’ he said. ‘I thought you might need some sustenance. You must be exhausted after being up all night with Maureen.’
‘Thank you...’ Grace’s face looked pale but her smile reached all the way to her eyes. ‘I am tired but I’m okay. And so happy that Maureen’s baby is also okay. Was Jenni upset that I didn’t make it to the train station?’
‘Not at all. She’s looking forward to telling you all about Melbourne later.’
‘She loved being here, didn’t she?’
‘She did.’
‘She’ll love Melbourne too. I’ve heard it’s an amazing place for a holiday.’
‘I’ve heard that too.’
Jock didn’t think his tone gave anything away but the look Grace gave him said otherwise.
‘It’s given you itchy feet, hasn’t it? To go somewhere new for more than just a holiday?’
And there it was again. An offering from the universe. A signpost to his escape route. How ironic was it that it was Grace who was presenting the opportunity to take a gentle first step towards that escape and to do it in a way that could protect them both?
‘You could be right about that.’ Jock tried to keep his tone merely thoughtful. ‘There are still so many more places in the world I haven’t seen. More adventures to be had.’
Okay...he might have caught a flicker of dismay in Grace’s gaze but it was hard to tell because she broke the eye contact so swiftly.
‘I’d better get going,’ she said. ‘I’ve got a wee adventure myself this afternoon. I’m taking a water taxi out for a home visit to Tessa to see how she’s going, setting up for the twins.’
‘Remind me where she lives?’
‘Kumutoto Bay. She’s got a waterfront property with its own jetty.’
‘Ah... I believe that’s one of the arms of Double Bay in the Queen Charlotte Sound. It’s a beautiful spot. Not too far away at all. No phone reception that I remember, though.’
‘No. She has a five-minute climb on the hill behind the house to use her cell phone or get the internet. They’ve got a landline, though.’
‘Tell her I’m looking forward to seeing her next week.’ But Jock was frowning as he thought about the implications of an extra degree of isolation. ‘I might see if I can persuade her to be admitted for a few days before her C-section is scheduled, just to be on the safe side. Maybe you could check she’s got her hospital bag packed already.’
‘Will do.’ Grace was moving away already. ‘Thanks for lunch. It must be my turn to make some dinner tonight.’
‘Don’t worry about me. I’ve heard there’s a tropical low forming northeast of New Zealand in the Coral Sea that could head our way later this week and I should go and check how secure Lassie’s moorings are.’
Grace paused, her head turning and her expression surprised. ‘But it looks as calm as a millpond out there. It’s not going to get rough while I’m going out to see Tessa, is it? I’m not sure I want to be out in big waves in a small boat.’
‘It never gets really rough in the Sounds. It’s out in Cook Strait that you get the gnarly seas with ten metre waves. And any bad weather with wind and rain will be days away yet and it could well be downgraded before it gets here. Don’t worry.’ He smiled at Grace, wanting to reassure her. ‘The MetService is just tracking its formation and path. It could change direction or not be as severe as they think, but it’s common sense to be prepared. Even if the water’s not rough, strong gusts of wind can cause boats to come loose and move enough to get damaged.’
Grace smiled back. ‘Good to know. Do you need any help with Lassie? I could meet you at the marina after work.’
‘No...’ The word came out with both a head-shake and more emphasis than Jock had intended, but the prospect of being alone with Grace—in the very space where this had started getting out of control in the first place was something to be avoided at all costs.
‘Thanks for the offer,’ he added. ‘But you’ll be tired enough as it is after last night.’ He turned away. ‘It’s not a problem. I can manage without you.’
* * *
Jock was running away, wasn’t he?
Making sure nobody got too close to him.
Had he somehow sensed that Grace had stepped over the acceptable boundaries of friendship in how she felt about Jock?
Had it really happened that fast—in the few hours since that middle-of-the-night ultrasound on an unborn baby—or had Grace unknowingly been giving off signals earlier? Last night, perhaps, when she’d let herself think that it might be okay to join Mandy and Stefano on the dance floor and it would be acceptable to be that close to Jock? Because she’d been missing his touch so much since they’d called time on her sex-life experiment. So much that it was actually a physical pain.
No...it was more likely that he’d seen what she’d been thinking about as they’d shared a relieved smile when the ultrasound had suggested Maureen’s baby wasn’t in any immediate danger. Had he also seen what she hadn’t quite realised herself at that point? That she could only imagine trying for another baby if it was going to be Jock’s baby?
That she was head over heels in love with him?
No wonder the alarm had sounded and he was running, if that was the case. But was he so convinced that a long-term relationship and perhaps a family was the last thing he wanted that he was prepared to upend his entire life yet again and move to a new place—a new country—and start all over again?
She needed to fix this.
So that Jock didn’t need to run away.
So that she could at least keep their friendship intact.
But, thanks to the fatigue that came from the sleepless night with Maureen, Grace couldn’t think of what she should do. Did she need to step back and give Jock enough space to feel safe or would it be better to talk about it?
No...that fatigue also meant that it would be harder to avoid revealing, or even saying, something that would make things worse. Giving Jock space seemed like the only option, so Grace didn’t fight the urge to crash that evening and she was sound asleep before Jock got home from checking on his boat.
She didn’t see him at work at all the next day because he had a full theatre list and she had an antenatal clinic with a surprise twist when she discovered that the backache one of her mums was experiencing turned out to be the beginning of active labour. Grace was caught up with a delivery that lasted until the early hours of the next morning.
She slept late the next morning and walked to work under a moody sky that was grey with thickening clouds, responding to messages from Jenni, who was following weather reports in Australia and hoping the tropical storm that had now been upgraded to a cyclone was not going to affect her planned flight back to the UK.
She texted her back.
You’ll be fine. Remember that the pilots want to get home as much as you do. They won’t fly if it’s not safe.
Have you heard what they’ve called it? Barry!!
No way!!
Grace sent a laughing face emoji, but she was starting to feel as grey as the clouds gathering above her head. Things were changing around her. Was the man who was quite possibly the love of her life moving rapidly away from her when a potentially damaging storm with the same name as her ex-husband was coming towards her?
She didn’t want to be where she was right now. It felt like something was about to break.
Cyclone Barry was all everyone wanted to talk about at work that day, as they checked weather maps and forecasts. The ominous-looking circle of swirling cloud above the Tasman Sea was staying well away from the eastern coast of Australia, but it did keep tracking directly towards New Zealand and warnings were being issued about potentially very heavy rain and strong winds.
It was beginning to rain lightly that evening as Grace got home to find Jock was heading out to have a game of squash with Stefano. It was the first time they’d been face to face since he’d dropped the bombshell that he might be looking for a new life somewhere else.
‘How did the visit with Tessa go yesterday?’
‘Good. She’s well set up with two of everything and a very supportive husband, Lawrence, who was there as well. He likes the idea of Tessa being admitted before the Caesarean. I asked if she had friends or family she could stay with in town if the weather got bad enough that it might cut them off, but she said she had too much to do at home to get ready for the babies.’
This was good, Grace thought. It was safe to talk about things like work and shared patients.
‘Lawrence asked me if he should stay home himself from now on because his work takes him all over the district, but Tessa told him he’d drive her crazy if he was hanging around for more than a week watching for any signs she might be going into labour. He’s taking a day off to come in for her next appointment with you, though.’
‘What does he do?’ Jock picked up his squash racquet that was leaning against the wall near the front door.
‘I’m not sure. Something to do with the Department of Conservation, which means he spends time in the national parks. They’re both really into nature. Their house is amazing—it’s in the middle of a punga fern forest with a path that goes down the hill to a tiny sandy beach and the pier. The living room opens to a big deck which has the most beautiful view I’ve ever seen.’
It was safe to talk about nice views too.
Would it also be safe to talk about something more personal? Jock had the perfect excuse to escape if he needed to, with his squash racquet and car keys in one hand and holding the laces of a pair of trainers in the other.
‘Did you hear from Jenni? Do you know if her flight took off? Last I heard, she was really worried about the cyclone.’
‘Yes. Took off right on time. I’m following the flight on a tracking app.’
Grace bit her lip. ‘Did you hear that they’ve named it Barry? My ex’s name.’
Jock’s expression was a sympathetic grimace as he nodded. His gaze not only met hers directly for the first time in this conversation, he held it. He was worried about how this might be affecting her, wasn’t he?
He cared about her...and that gave Grace a squeeze around her heart that felt a lot like hope.
‘It’s quite an appropriate analogy really.’ Grace took a deep breath. ‘He’s going to blow in, might do a bit of damage and then he’ll disappear, never to be seen again.’
The corners of Jock’s mouth curved upwards. ‘I like it,’ he said quietly. ‘And the sooner he’s gone for good, the better.’
Grace couldn’t look away as his gaze softened and then dropped to her lips. He was thinking about kissing her, wasn’t he?
He wanted to kiss her.
She wanted him to.
She felt something else then, in the instant Jock jerked his gaze away from hers. A heartbeat of the kind of awkwardness they’d had before—after Jenni had jokingly suggested there could be something going on between them and the idea of being physically attracted to each other had been hanging in the air.
But this was worse because it was for a very different reason this time. It was because there had been something going on between them and...
And Grace’s heart was breaking as she watched it fading into the distance because it was something Jock really, really didn’t want. He couldn’t get away fast enough right now, that was for sure. He muttered something about keeping Stefano waiting and then he was gone.
* * *
The first effects of Cyclone Barry began to be felt at the top of the South Island of New Zealand late the next afternoon, with heavy, squally rain showers and gusts of wind that were strong enough to be turning umbrellas inside out.
Jock was in the reception area of the labour ward when Grace went to file her patient notes.
‘Sharon’s ready for discharge,’ she told the ward clerk. ‘Baby number four has arrived with the minimum of fuss and she’s keen to get back home before this weather gets any worse.’
‘Aren’t we all?’ One of the registrars was shaking her head. ‘I hear the river’s rising quite fast. We might get stuck here ourselves.’
‘Did you hear that the cyclone’s been upgraded?’ Someone else was scrolling a weather website. ‘A cruise ship has cancelled a visit to Picton and there could well be disruptions to ferry crossings by this evening. It could be a category three, when or if it makes landfall.’
‘When is that forecast for?’ Jock was frowning. ‘I hadn’t heard that update. I’d better go and check on my boat again on my way home.’
One of the nurses shook her head. ‘And this is the man who was just talking about some idyllic job opportunity in the Solomon Islands? You do know that’s like the birthing suite for tropical cyclones, don’t you?’
Grace caught her breath. Was Jock already searching for his next job? Talking to other people about it, but not to her? Was he thinking of going somewhere even more remote than Australia, like a group of islands in the South Pacific?
She handed over the patient notes. ‘I need to go and help Sharon get sorted.’
What she really needed was to get away. As fast as Jock had when they’d been tempted to kiss each other last night.
She couldn’t stop herself thinking about that the moment she walked through the door after fighting her way home through the wind and rain.
This wasn’t going to work, was it?
The thought of being at home alone this evening while Jock was on board Lassie—the place he’d first made love to her—was almost unbearable.
He’d made it so very clear that he didn’t need her. That he didn’t want her as anything more than a friend.
She could hear the echo of his voice again.
As if...
Grace had known how he felt about commitment from before she’d even met Jock, so this was her problem, not his.
There might very well be no way of fixing this.
She had become everything he’d vowed to never have in his life, hadn’t she? Someone who was in love with him and would marry him in a heartbeat if he asked.
Someone who wanted to have the baby he had sworn he would never bring into the world.
She was his worst nightmare, wasn’t she?
The ringtone of her phone was a welcome interruption to the negative spiral her thoughts were threatening to develop into. Until she answered the call.
‘Grace...? I need you...’
‘Tessa? What’s wrong?’
‘I think I’m getting contractions.’
The hairs on the back of Grace’s neck prickled. ‘How often?’
‘I’ve only had two. One was about fifteen minutes ago and I just got another one while I was climbing up the hill. It doesn’t hurt but... I’m scared...’
‘Where’s Lawrence?’
‘He was at work...the Pelorus Bridge Reserve...’ The phone line was crackling. Fading in and out. ‘...been a slip on the main road and he’s stuck...’
‘Is there anyone who can bring you in to the hospital?’
‘No... I tried...but...’ Her words were cut off. The next ones were an agonised wail. ‘...all my fault...’
