Firecracker, page 12
Heading for the bathroom, I took a long shower and washed my hair and body thoroughly. The hot water felt wonderful on my skin, and I found myself closing my eyes and revelling in the heat, remembering what had happened between Dax and I earlier and hoping it wouldn’t be the last time I ever experienced such a visceral, intense response to another person.
Before I could lose myself in sensation, I shut off the shower and climbed out of the stall. Wrapping myself in towels, I padded to the bedroom and sat on the side of the bed, thinking about everything and wondering how I would approach the issue come Monday.
As I sat thinking, a tapping sound registered in the back of my head. Looking around, I stared at the windows, confused for a moment before realising what it was. Rushing to the window, I opened it and stared down. In the darkness, standing below my window, was Dax.
‘Can I come up?’ she asked, in a harsh whisper.
‘What are you doing here?’ I exclaimed, shocked, but keeping my voice quiet.
‘Unlock the door!’ she whispered.
‘Two seconds!’ I said back, my voice quiet and hushed.
Whirling around, I quickly dispensed with my towel on the bedroom floor and pulled on sleep shorts and a t-shirt. I ran a hand through my short, messy hair and then rushed for the door.
Running down the stairs, I headed to the back door where she lingered and unlocked it quietly. Pulling it open, I was confronted with her in the flesh.
‘What are you doing here?’ I whispered.
‘I had to see you…had to talk to you…’
‘Come inside,’ I said, reaching for her arm and tugging.
‘What about your Mum?’ she asked, frowning.
‘She’s at work…till ten,’ I told her. ‘Get in before the neighbours see you.’
Dax came in then and followed me as I hurried back through the house, up the stairs and back to my bedroom. Only once we were inside, did we start to talk.
Turning to face her, I met her eyes. ‘What are you doing here, Dax?’ I asked, again.
‘Are you here alone? Can we talk freely?’ she questioned, seemingly unsure of herself.
‘Yes, Mum is out till ten. She waitresses,’ I said, quietly.’
‘Okay, good…that’s good. I had to come…had to talk to you, Fiya.’
‘I wanted to talk to you too,’ I admitted, feeling uncomfortable.
‘You did?’ she said, looking surprised.
‘I…yeah,’ I said, looking away from her intense gaze. ‘I feel bad…about earlier…’
‘So do I,’ she said, watching me intently. ‘And I can’t accept what you said earlier.’
‘You can’t?’
‘Not all of it, no,’ she said, taking a step closer to me. ‘I mean, yes, you’re right about so much-this isn’t easy, it’s not something that can last-and no, I’m not offering a future to you, Fiya. Despite all that…despite all the negatives we can both think of and the reasons we shouldn’t do this, all I can think of is you, Fiya. I want to be with you-if that’s for a day, a week, months or a year. I understand why you backed off, but I’m begging with you, Fiya. Don’t do this…I really like you…give me a chance to show you that?’
‘I…’ I broke off, not knowing how to go about telling her how I was feeling. ‘I don’t know…’
‘Fiya, you said you didn’t want to be heartbroken, but it’s already hurting me to think that we can’t be close anymore. Please rethink what you said earlier…we can make this work…somehow…’
‘Dax, listen,’ I said, turning to look at her and scan her eyes. ‘I’ve been thinking too…and I think…I think…well, I think you’re right…’ I said, slowly.
Her eagerness to convince me and talk me around stopped and she froze, staring at me, wide-eyed. ‘I am?’
I sighed. ‘Since we parted earlier, I’ve been thinking…’
‘You have?’ she prompted.
I nodded, unable to look away from her gorgeous eyes. ‘Yeah. I spoke to Avi too…for advice.’
‘Really? What did she suggest? Please tell me that it was positive?’
I smiled, the tension easing slightly. ‘It was…relax…’
‘What did she say, Fiya?’
I sighed. ‘She said that I should just enjoy seeing you. That I should take the opportunity while it’s here. She knows that my whole future is planned out for me, and she thinks I should grab every chance for happiness I can get before that happens.’
‘I think Avi has a great point!’ Dax exclaimed. ‘Because our situation is unique, Fiya-and I’m not saying this is easy…of course it’s not! We both have our lives set out for us-like you so rightly said-but that doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy these moments of knowing one another! please, Fiya. Give me a second chance. Give us a second chance.’
I scanned her eyes. ‘How would we even do this?’ I questioned. ‘Our parents…?’
She shrugged. ‘We’re friends, right?’ she said, brightening. ‘That’s all they need to know. I’m like Avi…another one of your friends.’
I scoffed. ‘You’re completely different to Avi as a friend, Dax.’
‘Well, we know that!’ she chuckled. ‘But our parents don’t need to know.’
‘I guess,’ I murmured, looking at her closely. ‘So, what do we do? Carry on in secret?’
‘Well, yeah…I think that’s the only way we can do this. It can be our secret though, Fiya. Something for just you and me to share.’
I cocked my head at her. ‘I kind of like that idea.’
‘You know what? I kind of like that idea too,’ she smiled.
I scanned her eyes. ‘I don’t know how to do this with you,’ I admitted.
‘Neither do I…but we just make it up as we go along.’
‘Stolen moments?’ I questioned.
She shrugged. ‘If that’s what it takes.’
‘I wish things could be different,’ I murmured, frowning at the thought.
‘I know,’ she replied, softly, taking my hand in hers. ‘But it is what it is. At least we’re not arguing now. I felt so bad after earlier. I had to see you,’ she revealed. ‘I hope you don’t mind me coming here.’
‘I don’t mind,’ I told her, quietly. ‘I mean, Mum’s not here…’
‘Yeah-that was very lucky,’ she mused. ‘Good timing on my part, clearly.’
‘Did you sneak out?’ I asked then.
She nodded. ‘Yeah…so I can’t stop long…but I had to see you. I just had to.’
I took a step closer. ‘If you have to leave soon…before you go…kiss me one more time?’ I requested.
‘Oh, Fiya, I want nothing more,’ she murmured, stepping closer and lowering her head.
Her mouth met mine hungrily, and she kissed me passionately. I opened my mouth to hers and matched her need with every movement she made. She tasted incredible and her scent, as always, swamped me and made me dizzy. Melting into her embrace, we kissed endlessly, loving each other’s mouths, and taking all we could in those precious moments we had together.
I barely noticed when Dax reached for my necklace and pulled it free. I heard it clatter to the floor but couldn’t have cared less, all I was thinking of was her.
She backed me up against the nearest wall, kissing me constantly, her mouth, lips and tongue making me ache with pent up desire. It was like nothing I’d ever experienced before, and I arched against her eagerly.
Dax’s hands slid down my flanks, stroking over the curve of my hips before tugging me closer still. One of her hands moved to my sleep shorts, and she cupped me through the thin cotton material.
Moaning into her mouth, I undulated against her, eager for her to move her hand and stimulate me further-better still, to push her fingers inside my clothing and make me come wildly.
I didn’t have to wait for long before she did just that, sliding that same hand up before easing it down my lower stomach and in between my legs. As her fingers slid into my soft folds, I gasped with pleasure. I was slick for her, aroused and ready, so her fingers moved over me silkily.
Letting my tongue dance with hers, I stretched up against her, loving the way she touched me and feeling increasingly aroused as each moment passed. Her fingers were now rubbing my tender clitoris and I was pulsing against her, throbbing with my need for climax.
She kept working me upwards, increasing the pressure of her touch and going faster until I knew I was toppling over the edge.
I came with a cry, ripping my mouth from hers and gasping my pleasure into the quiet room. Wave upon wave of pleasure rushed through me and my whole body tightened and then released in delicious motion.
Throughout, she kept kissing me, and when I was replete, she eased my hand against her own sex, encouraging me to touch her too, and showing me that she needed me as much as I needed her.
I touched her eagerly, undoing her jeans and sliding my fingers inside. Her soft folds were damn with desire, making it easy to touch her and rub her intimately. I began circling against the nub of her clitoris and she pulled my face to hers, wanting to kiss me as I touched her. I opened my mouth and let my tongue play against hers. She moaned her bliss into my mouth and moved in rhythm with my fingers.
It didn’t take long to push her to the edge. My fingers rubbed faster, and her breathing became ragged. With her head falling back against the wall, I worked her endlessly and her breath caught before she came, tensing and releasing, her soft cries music to my ears.
Wrapping each other in our arms, we held each other for long moments. It felt so good to be back at this point; back together. I’d only known the woman for a week, but she’d irrevocably changed my life, forever.
Lifting her head moments later, she looked down at me with regret. ‘I’m going to have to go soon,’ she said, apologetically.
‘I know,’ I replied, quietly. ‘But it’s fine, right? We made up,’ I said, smiling a little mischievously.
‘That’s right, we did,’ she smiled. ‘And it felt so good,’ she added.
‘I know,’ I murmured. ‘It’s all new to be, obviously, but I love doing that with you.’
‘Me too, baby,’ she murmured. ‘And just so you know, our connection-it’s rare. I may have had a few girlfriends before you, but I’ve never felt like this with them. When I’m with you, it’s like there’s electricity in the air between us. The way you make me feel when you touch me as well-it’s intense.’
I stared at her, unable to pull my gaze from hers. ‘So, this is our secret?’
She sighed. ‘I guess so.’
‘Maybe if we think about it as an exciting thing, rather than sad that we have to hide it, we’ll enjoy it more?’ I suggested.
‘That’s true,’ she murmured.
‘But we’ll have to keep it quiet at school…’
‘Mmm, that could be a problem,’ she mused.
‘How come?’ I asked.
‘Avi! You told her, right? I get the impression she likes a good gossip, Fiya!’
‘Well, she does-but she would keep this quiet. She’s my best friend, Dax. I have to have someone to talk to.’
‘That’s true…maybe we should help her get a boyfriend then she’ll have her own love life to focus on, rather than ours,’ she mused.
‘You know, that’s actually a really good idea-she’s going to be so disappointed when she realises Aradam isn’t interested in her.’
She laughed, scoffing at the thought. ‘The only thing Aradam is interested in is really cute, blonde guys. That’s his type, I see it all the time.’
I shook my head. ‘Your parents would have a fit if they knew you’re both gay!’ I exclaimed.
‘Exactly, firecracker…that’s why it’s our little secret. Look, I better go…come and see me out?’ she requested.
‘Yeah, of course.’
I led Dax back downstairs and to the door where I’d let her in earlier. We lingered there, kissing each other senseless and desperate not to let one another go. Despite not wanting to leave, she eventually pulled back from me-more than a little reluctantly.
‘I have to go, baby,’ she murmured.
‘I know,’ I sighed.
‘I’ll see you Monday?’ she asked.
‘Yeah…I’ll miss you tomorrow,’ I revealed.
‘Me too, firecracker…I’ll think about you though. A lot,’ she added.
‘Me too. I’ll try and catch you before class on Monday morning.’
‘I look forward to it, baby,’ she murmured, bending to kiss me gently one more time. ‘Bye!’ she whispered, opening the door.
‘Bye!’ I called, waving her off. I floated back to my room on cloud nine.
Sunday passed slowly and I had to make myself busy in order to distract myself from thoughts of Dax. By the time Monday morning rolled around, I was itching to leave for college-because I would see her again.
‘Hey you!’ Avi cried brightly, as she arrived at my house.
I was waiting on the front drive, more than ready to leave. ‘Hey.’
‘You’re ready early-what’s going on?’ she questioned, taking my arm and leading me off down the road.
‘Oh, nothing-just woke up early, I guess,’ I shrugged, but smiled to myself happily.
‘Bullshit!’ she called. ‘You’re ready early to see Dax, right? Did you speak to her? Tell me you called her and apologised?’
‘We made up,’ I said, smiling happily.
‘Yeah? When did this happen?’ she exclaimed, clearly pleased for me.
‘Saturday night. She snuck out to come and talk to me. We talked and sorted everything out.’
‘Yay!’ Avi cried, overdramatising things with a flamboyant clap of her hands. ‘That’s great, right? Are you happy?’
‘I’m really happy, thanks Avi. I mean, we’re going to keep it a secret-so you can’t go blabbing it around school, but you’re right with what you said on the phone-soon enough, the rest of my life is going to be dictated to me. I’m going to do something for me right now-and being with Dax makes me feel good, so I’m doing that.’
‘Good for you! Oh my God, I’m jealous though! I need a boyfriend!’ she cried, dramatically.
I chuckled, amused by her antics. ‘It’s all good, Avi…we’ll work on that next. Dax and I already said that we’d help after how helpful you’ve been with us.’
‘Yeah? Well, that sounds good! I don’t seem to be getting anywhere with Aradam. It’s really frustrating actually, I mean, what’s wrong with me?’
‘Nothing is wrong with you, Avi. Actually, I know why now…if you want to know…’ I said, cautiously.
‘What? Why? Oh my God, don’t hold out on me! Tell me!’ she exclaimed.
I paused, turning to look at her. ‘Uh, well, Aradam is gay, Avi. Dax told me herself.’
She gaped at me, stunned. ‘He’s gay?’
‘Yeah…I’m sorry, Avi,’ I said, sympathetically.
‘Sorry? This is great news!’ she exclaimed.
‘It is? Why’s that?’ I frowned.
‘Because I thought it was just me! If’s he’s gay then there’s a clear reason why he’s not into me. I just thought I was an ugly troll!’
‘Oh Avi, don’t be ridiculous. You’re gorgeous. You just haven’t met the right guy yet, I’m sure,’ I told her, kindly.
‘Well, I’m relying on Dax and you to help now that you’re all coupled up happily,’ she smiled. ‘Well, I never…Aradam being gay. It all makes sense now,’ she mused, falling back into step with me.
‘I’m glad you’re not upset,’ I commented, as we reached the school.
‘Upset? It makes a whole world of sense now-and means I can move onto the next, more willing guy!’ she laughed.
‘Oh look,’ I said, as butterflies skipped through my stomach. ‘There’s Dax!’
She laughed at me. ‘You’re hook, line and sinker for her, aren’t you?’
‘Oh, shut up,’ I scolded, shoving her playfully. ‘And remember-our relationship is a secret, okay?’
‘Yes, yes…it’s fine. No-one will hear it from me.’
‘Good. I’m glad. Come on…I want to see Dax before class.’
We walked over to where Dax stood under a tree, chatting with friends. She looked gorgeous, in jeans and a white t-shirt, her bright blonde hair shining in the sunlight and her radiant cheeks pink as she smiled at what a friend was saying.
As we got closer, she noticed us, visibly lighting up with pleasure.
‘Fiya! Avi!’ she exclaimed, turning to kiss my cheek-and then Avi’s for good measure.
Moving back to my side, I felt the skin on my cheek burning after her touch on my skin. I wanted to lift my hand to the flaming red flesh, but I resisted the urge.
‘Hiya,’ I said instead.
‘How are you?’ she asked, looking down at me.
‘I’m fine,’ I murmured. ‘Glad it’s Monday.’
‘Unlike the rest of us!’ Avi commented.
Dax laughed. ‘Hey, meet my friends,’ she welcomed, glancing at Avi.
I wondered if this was her first attempt at setting Avi up, so I smiled happily, pleased she was trying to help our situation. As she introduced us around, I was itching to reach for her, tug her into my arms and become lost in her kiss.
Trying to quench the desperate need inside me, I focused on the introductions of the group surrounding her.
‘And this is Ayce,’ she said, indicating a tall, smiling brown-haired guy, who was clearly attractive.
‘Hi,’ he smiled, shaking Avi’s hand and then mine. Quickly turning back to her, he addressed her. ‘You’re Avi, right? I’ve seen you around.’
‘You have?’ she asked, looking stunned, and as if her luck had come in.
‘Yeah-you did that painting they showed in assembly right? I thought it was incredible,’ he said, shaking his head. ‘I’m taking art too-but it doesn’t come easily…maybe you could give me a few pointers on this piece I’m working on?’ he said, drawing out his sketchpad.
‘Yeah sure!’ she said, excitedly, moving beside him.
‘Avi, Ayce-I’m going to show Fiya the song I’ve been working on before class. Catch you later, yeah? Maybe meet under the silver birch at lunch?’ Dax suggested.
