One-Timer (Carolina Comets), page 7
“I’m kind of curious too,” Ryan says, grabbing her own chip. “Lowell has always given off this intense sort of vibe. I wonder if that carries into the bedroom too.”
“I’m totally telling Rhodes you think about other dudes in the bedroom.”
Ryan glares at Harper. “You wouldn’t dare. He’ll—actually, you know what? Go ahead and tell him. I’ll take the punishment.” She pops the chip in her mouth, almost giddy at that thought.
“So, how was it?” Emilia asks again.
“How was what?” I feign ignorance, taking a sip of my water.
“The sex!” She shouts it just a little too loud, drawing stares from others at the tables next to ours. “You know, the sex you had with the hot-as-hell pro-hockey player. They’ve got stamina for days, you know.”
“Sounds like you’re speaking from experience,” I toss back, and she flicks her eyes away, avoiding my gaze. Dammit. One of these days, I will get her to talk about it.
“I’m definitely speaking from experience when I say you heard right,” Ryan says.
“Can confirm,” Harper agrees.
“See? I was right. Tell us.”
“It was…” I lift a shoulder. “It was nice.”
“Nice? Nice? You got pregnant from nice sex? How boring.” Emilia pouts. “Never tell your child that.”
I laugh. “I don’t think I’ll be telling the tale of how my baby was conceived.”
“You never know. My mother told me once—in detail. Like way, way too much detail.” She shudders, then reaches for her drink again. “She was drunk, which is what I’m about to be.” She takes a healthy sip, then dips another chip in the queso. “Tell me or I’m going to throw this messy-as-hell chip at you.”
“You wouldn’t.”
“Oh, I would.”
She lifts it to chuck it my way, and I hold my hand up.
“Fine, fine. I’ll tell you. Put the weapon down.” I shake my head at her antics as she pops the chip into her mouth with a victorious grin. I glance around the table, and all of them are staring at me expectantly, apparently very invested in knowing how sex with Lowell was.
I don’t know what to tell them because I don’t know how to put it into words.
I don’t know how to tell them I’ve thought about it almost nonstop since it happened. I don’t know how to tell them it was the single most amazing experience of my life. How he laid me out across the bed and took his time stripping my dress from my body, then kissing every single inch of it, bringing me to orgasm twice before sliding into me and going for the hat trick. How he was gentle in the best ways and rough in all the even better ones.
And how the worst part is not even him being a giant asshole last night can taint it.
I don’t know how to say any of that, so I just say, “Better than anything I’ve ever had before.”
Not that I have much to compare it to. I’ve only had sex with three men in my life. One was my high school boyfriend, and that was over in about point two seconds. The other was Thad, and he was pretty much a one-trick pony…if you count just slamming into me in missionary to be a trick.
“You’re totally glowing just thinking about it.” Emilia grins, bouncing her brows up and down.
“I think that’s just part of being pregnant.”
“Or the sign of some really hot sex.” She frowns like she’s just remembered who that really hot sex was with. “I have half a mind to go to my uncle and tell him what a giant jerk Lowell is being. Have him mess with his equipment or something.”
“While I very much appreciate it, that’s not necessary.”
“I could have Rhodes accidentally cup-check him during practice,” Ryan offers.
I grin. “Again, thank you, but no.”
“You have to know Collin is going to murder him when he hears about this, don’t you?” Harper says.
“No, because you’re not telling him.”
“Hollis! You can’t be serious!”
“I am. I’m very serious. This whole…thing…it’s between me and Lowell and that’s it. I don’t need you ladies to deploy your men to fight my battles for me.” I look pointedly at Emilia because I don’t know exactly who her man is, but I don’t want her getting any ideas either. “It’s going to be fine. I’ll figure it out.”
Harper shakes her head, clearly upset with me. I’m upset with me too, especially for getting myself into this mess where the father of my baby thinks I’m just some puck bunny trying to trap him.
I have no idea what gave him the idea that that’s the type of person I am, but it really bothers me that he thinks I’m even remotely capable of doing something like that. It’s what kept me up half the night trying to figure it out.
Well, that and the urge to pee every damn hour.
“Have you told Mom yet?” Harper asks.
I groan. “Ugh. No, not yet. Mostly because I’m terrified she’s going to start apartment hunting out here the moment she finds out.”
“I’d be surprised if she already hasn’t started now that we both live here.”
I love my mother something fierce. She’s a good person with a really good heart, and Harper and I are her entire world.
But she can also be very…suffocating. She wasn’t always like that. Sure, she was a concerned mother and always wanted us girls to be careful, but it got worse after our father passed. Suddenly everywhere we went and everything we did was too dangerous. I bet if she could have gotten away with it, she would have wrapped us up in bubble wrap just to keep us from ever getting hurt again.
Keeping Harper and me safe and being overprotective is her way of coping with not just my father dying, but how he died—in a car accident on his way to see his mistress.
Up until that point, they’d had the perfect marriage. Sixteen years of bliss. Sixteen years of dancing in the kitchen to Frank Sinatra and lavish anniversary dinners. Sixteen years of good-morning kisses and never going to bed angry.
To say her heart broke in the worst kind of way when she discovered why he was out in the middle of a snowstorm would be an understatement. She wants to protect us from that same hurt.
I lay my hand over my still flat belly because, in a crazy sort of way, I kind of get it now. I haven’t even met my baby yet and I already have this intense urge to protect it at all costs. I can’t imagine how strong that feeling is going to be when they’re nearly thirty.
“Let’s talk about something else,” Emilia says. “Like baby names or something. I personally think Emilia is beautiful, but I could be incredibly biased on that.”
“You are,” Harper tells her. “But I think we can all agree that Harper is a beautiful name too.”
I look at Ryan. “Care to throw your own name in the ring too?”
“Nah. I’ll keep my name to myself, thanks. Though I do think you should name your baby something badass, like Buffy or Khaleesi.”
I wait for her to laugh, but she doesn’t.
“Oh, what about Katniss? Or Xena? You know, like the Warrior Princess. I got it!” Emilia snaps. “Alanis! Like Morissette. She’s like the crusher of men’s hopes and dreams and it’s amazing. Total angry-girl rock goddess.”
“That is… I’ll take that into consideration too.”
“What if it’s a boy?” Ryan points out.
“Thor. Definitely Thor,” Emilia says. “No, wait! What about Thanos? Wait—no. Thor is much better.”
Ryan and Emilia settle into a debate over names, but Harper doesn’t join in. Instead, she slips her hand into mine and squeezes it.
“Even if Lowell doesn’t come around, it’s obvious that baby Buffy Khaleesi Katniss Xena Alanis is going to be so loved.”
“Or Thor Thanos.”
She grins. “Or Thor Thanos.”
And for the first time since I took those tests, I don’t feel so alone.
I was right about my mother.
I hold my phone propped on my pillow and try not to sigh as she starts listing off all the apartments she’s been looking at nearby.
“And then there’s one that’s only about two miles up the road from you. They have a gorgeous garden I can picture enjoying my morning coffee in,” she says, flipping the phone—like literally the entire phone, not just the camera—to show me a distorted photo of said garden.
“Looks great, Mom, but don’t you think you’re jumping the gun here?”
She flips the phone back around and gives me a sharp glare. “Don’t take that tone with me, Hollis Pearl.”
I try not to cringe at the use of my middle name, which I loathe entirely. I make a promise to myself right then to not give my child an awful middle name.
“I’m going to be a grandmother. A grandmother, Hollis! Of course I’m going to want to be part of that child’s life, and I can’t really do that from the other side of the state, now can I?”
I want to point out that yes, she can, and I will make trips back and forth all the time, but I know no matter what I say, it won’t be enough. I may as well resign myself to the fact that my mother will be moving out this way with or without my approval. It’s only a matter of time now.
“I know, Mom, I just—” My words are cut off by a big yawn, and a frown tugs at her lips the moment my mouth opens.
“What’s wrong? Everything okay?”
I barely resist the urge to roll my eyes. “Everything’s fine. I’m just tired, you know. Growing life and all that. I’m sure you remember what that’s like.”
“Oh, gosh, do I ever. You girls wore me out so badly before you were even born. Especially Harper because she was just so unpredictable.” A sweet smile tugs at her lips. “Forever marching to the beat of her own drum, that one.”
She’s right. Harper’s always been just who she is and has never apologized for it a day in her life. I’ve always admired that about her and wish I could say I’ve done the same, but I haven’t. Where Harper has always been the type to stand out in a crowd and try new things, I’ve been the type to blend in and not take many risks. It was easier that way. Safer.
Of course the one time I step out of my comfort zone and do something risky, I get punished for it.
I pat my stomach. Sorry, little bit, you’re not a punishment.
“Anyway, I should let you get some rest,” my mother says, surprising me. “I’m sure this week has been very exciting for you.”
Exciting isn’t the exact word I’d use for it.
When I told her I’m pregnant, the first thing she asked was if the baby is Thad’s and if we’d be getting back together. At first, I was really hurt that she thought I’d go back to him after what he did to me. But when she blew out a relieved breath when I told her not a chance, I was glad.
She asked if I was dating someone, and I said no.
After that, she dropped it. I was surprised she didn’t press the issue and ask more questions since she’s typically all up in my business about everything else. I think she could sense my turmoil regarding the situation. She’s not asking now, but I know she will later, and I’m already dreading the conversation.
“Something like that,” I murmur.
Concern pulls at her eyes and I can tell she has so much to say, but she doesn’t say it. Instead, she says, “I love you, Hollis. Everything will be okay.”
And because I’m a complete hot mess, tears sting my eyes. This week has been exhausting, and I don’t think I realized how badly I needed to hear that from my own mother.
“Thanks, Mom. I love you too.”
“I know.” She winks. “Get some rest, okay? Call me tomorrow.”
“I will. Good night.”
“Good night, kiddo.”
I toss my phone onto the pillow beside me and roll over onto my back. I stare up at the ceiling, running my hands over my stomach, marveling at the fact that I have a little cherry-sized human growing inside of me.
Harper was right. Even if Lowell doesn’t come around, I know this baby will be loved and cared for. I have support from some of the greatest people in the world who will make sure that holds true.
“Everything will be okay,” I tell myself as my eyes drift shut.
This time when I say it, I almost believe it.
8
LOWELL
“Hold your horses! I’m coming!”
I push my arm through my shirt as I amble through the house to find out who the fuck is knocking on my door at this hour. It’s barely seven AM, and I have no clue who it could be. Only three people on the team even know where I live—and one of those people is Coach.
Blurry-eyed, I bump into a table in the hallway.
“Fuck,” I mutter, annoyed at the table and myself. I’ve slept like absolute dog shit last two nights, and I’d really rather not deal with whoever is standing on my porch right now.
I yank the door open, a scowl firmly in place. “Wh—” I don’t even get the full word out before a fist connects with my face and I stumble backward into the house. “What the…” I clutch my face as Collin shoves his way inside my home.
He slams the door behind him, then slams me into the wall so hard I’m going to be surprised if there’s not a dent in it. He drags his forearm over my throat, holding me in place as he gives me a murderous glare.
“What the hell, man?” I spit out, and he doesn’t even flinch when my blood splatters against his face. “What the fuck are you doing in my house, Wright?”
“What the hell is wrong with you?” he hisses, shoving into my windpipe with just enough pressure to knock the breath out of me. “Huh? What in the actual fuck is wrong with you, Lowell?”
He shoves his arm into my throat again, this time hard enough that I choke. I make a halfhearted attempt to try to fight him off, but the prick is big and not going anywhere. Besides, I know deep in my gut that I deserve this and so much more.
I was a total dick to Hollis the other night. The second the shock of everything wore off, I knew I was completely in the wrong.
She wouldn’t be setting me up. I know she wouldn’t. We didn’t spend a lot of time together, but I know she’s not that kind of person.
After she told me, I was up half the night staring at my phone trying to decide whether I should call or text and what the fuck I was going to say to make everything better. I kept coming up blank because I have no idea how I am going to make it better.
Shit. It’s been thirty-six hours and I still don’t know how I’m going to make it better.
“I…I’m sorry, okay? I fucked up. Are you happy?”
His eyes narrow on me, making sure I’m telling the truth. Satisfied with what he sees, he shoves on me once more before releasing me, letting me drop back down to my feet.
I gulp in deep breaths of air and wipe at the blood leaking from my nose and mouth.
“Shit, man,” I say, still trying to catch my breath. “You’re lucky I’ve already lost my real teeth or else I’d be really pissed.”
“Yeah, well, join the club because I am pissed.” He shakes his head at me. “What the fuck, dude?”
I take a few more deep breaths before pushing off the wall and righting myself. I shove past him, making sure to knock him in the shoulder, and head for the kitchen to clean off all the blood and get an ice pack.
He follows behind me, no doubt glaring holes into the back of my head.
“Did you really ask her if she’s sure it’s yours?”
I grimace at his words as I pull a bottle of water from the fridge and twist off the cap. I swish the water around my mouth a few times to get the taste of blood out. Then I down the rest of it in one drink and close the fridge, not bothering to offer Collin anything because screw him after what he just did.
I mean, I deserved it, but screw him.
“I…sort of implied,” I finally say after several long moments.
“And did you also imply that she got pregnant on purpose to try to trap you?”
Another grimace, which is answer enough.
I grab the dish towel that’s hanging off the stove, run it under some cold water, and press it to my split lip that’s no doubt doubled in size already.
Fuck, Collin hits hard.
“I have to ask again…what the hell is wrong with you, Lowell? Why the hell would you say that to her? Do you really think that is something Hollis is capable of?”
“No! Not at all.”
“Then why did you say it?”
I narrow my eyes at him. “You know why.”
“Because of that shit with Celine all those years ago?”
“Yes!”
“Dude!” He runs his hands through his hair like he’s irritated with me. Well, I’m fucking irritated with him, barging into my house and hitting me at the crack of dawn. “Get the fuck over it already.”
“It’s not exactly that easy.”
“Yes, it is. Because they are two completely different people.”
“You think I don’t know that?”
He holds his arms wide. “Apparently not, because here we are.”
“I freaked, okay? In my defense, I had just found out my one-night stand got pregnant. Kind of a lot to take in, no?”
He grinds his teeth together. “I owe you another for that too—for taking advantage of her when she was vulnerable.”
“It wasn’t like that,” I argue, because it wasn’t.
At least I don’t think it was.
Fuck…was it? Did… Did Hollis not want it too? I knew she was struggling with the wedding and how fresh her divorce was, but it’s not like I pressured her into anything. Hell, she was the one who asked me to make a bad decision with her. Did I do something wrong by saying yes?
“How did that even happen? Did you not wrap your shit up?”
“Of course I did! I just… The condom was kind of old, all right? It was one I’d had in my wallet for a while.”
“A while? How long is a while?”
I screw my face up, not wanting to admit it. “A…year. Or more.”
He tosses his head back with a groan. “Holy fuck. No wonder you got her knocked up.”
“Hey, it’s not like I went to your wedding in hopes of falling into some pussy, okay? That wasn’t part of my plan at all. I know how desperate unattached women at weddings are to attach themselves to someone. I was not about to get mixed up in that.”
