Wild Collision, page 8
“No,” I snap. I actually like Dean, but he’s all too fun to mess with.
“Uncle Hayes will let me.” He narrows his green eyes on me.
Dean and I are actually related by blood. His dad and mine are cousins. But I’ve always grown up closer to my dad’s bandmates’ kids than him and his siblings. On the road, we only had each other. It made sense to stick together.
Dean follows me into the back and straight into the recording room The Wild has been occupying.
“Jesus, I can’t shake you,” I grumble. Looking up my eyes connect with Hollis’s and he looks livid eyeing Dean behind me.
Someone is jealous, and I selfishly love it.
“Dean,” my dad crows. “What a nice surprise.”
I toss my thumb over my shoulder. “In Dean’s words, he’d like to commandeer one of the booths to record a song for Willow to give her for Christmas.” I pretend to gag. “Love makes me choke,” I joke. I actually like being in love. The problem is the guys I fall for end up being jerks and I end up hurt. It’s why I know I have to keep Hollis at arm’s length. It’d be all too easy to fall into the abyss that is him and he’s one man I’m not sure I could recover from. I can’t help but glance in his direction and watch as his eyes settle from a blazing gold to a soft amber as he realizes I’m not interested in Dean.
I practically vomit at the thought.
“Not a problem,” my dad says. “Let me know when you need a booth and I can help you out. Or Mia can. She knows what to do.” I glare at my dad but he’s oblivious.
Dean gives me a triumphant smile and I stick out my tongue. I can’t help but dissolve into laughter. Pretending to be irritated with Dean never lasts long. He’s too big of a goof to actually be mad at.
“I gotta get back to work,” he says. “See you guys later.”
“Tell Willow we need to hang out,” I call after him.
“Will do.” He gives me a mock salute.
“Why do you insist on giving him a hard time?” My dad asks and I glance toward the booth, seeing Fox paused in his recording, his guitar hanging in front of him as he watches us through the glass.
“Um … because it’s fun. He’s practically like a brother. It’s all too easy to mess with him.”
My dad simply shakes his head and pushes a button to speak to Fox.
“Is anybody hungry? Coffee?” I ask.
“Pizza!” Rush cries loudly. “I need pizza more than I need my next breath.”
“Yeah, pizza sounds great,” Cannon says in a deep voice. He barely ever talks, at least to me or in front of me, so I’m startled to hear a complete sentence out of him.
Hollis nods in agreement.
“I’ll order pizza then.” I duck from the room and head for the kitchen area. I pull my phone from my pocket to order pizza from a place downtown that makes the best wood-fired grilled pizzas.
I finish ordering and turn around finding Hollis leaning against the wall, his arms crossed over his chest. His shirt rides up a bit, exposing a tiny sliver of tanned smooth stomach. I swallow past the lump in my throat.
Those wicked eyes stare me down. He doesn’t say a word. He doesn’t have to.
He stalks toward me, and I back away like a cornered animal, ending up right where he wants me with my butt pressing into the counter with no means of escaping.
He lowers his head to the crook of my neck and my breath stutters, thinking he’s going to kiss me there. Instead he whispers a confession against the heat of my skin. “I’m trying so fucking hard to be your friend, Mia—to not be the guy you think I am, that I was—but it’s killing me. I’ve never been the jealous type, but I wanted to rip that guy’s head off for being close to you.”
I don’t know what to say. I can barely breathe.
Things between us are escalating quickly and it scares the shit out of me. I’ve always been the cautious type but ever since Hollis stepped out of my bathroom I’ve felt like I’ve jumped feet first into a pool of water and my feet never found the bottom. Now I’m desperate for air but the surface is too far to reach.
If I could stay away from him, if I hadn’t proposed this whole friends thing, maybe eventually I’d be able to wade through the waters I’ve tumbled into, but it’s impossible. There’s no avoiding Hollis Wilder—and even if I tried to ignore him I know he’d find me.
“You need to step back,” I say. “If my dad—”
He growls, cursing under his breath but does step away. He shoves his fingers roughly through his honeyed brown curls.
We stare at each other, so little distance between us when in reality we’re miles apart.
I can’t deny the way my heart beats around him. I can’t deny some of the thoughts I’ve had. I may not be able to deny them, but I can’t act on them either. This attraction between us is only that—an attraction—and I’m not the kind of girl who does one-night stands. I don’t judge someone who does, but it’s not for me, and I know Hollis will eventually grow bored of me. Then what? Besides, he’s working on an amazing album I feel certain will do extremely well and then they’ll end up going on tour. Touring means temptation at every turn. Heck, I can recall being small and even with the wives and kids traveling with them half-clothed women still threw themselves at my dad and the other members of Willow Creek.
“We can’t be more than friends,” I tell him. “It has to be this way. I’m sorry.”
His jaw works back and forth. “I want to be that guy for you—a good guy. The one who doesn’t push you for more, who’s there for you, but I’m not so sure I can be your friend. I’m trying. I really am, but I can’t stop feeling the way I do either and it’s killing me. It’s killing me, Mia.”
Gone is the cocky guy who strutted out of my bathroom and in his place is a stranger. Someone who’s a mere shadow of the other guy. The vulnerability he displays nearly knocks me unbalanced. I wish the other version of him would come back, disliking him was easier. Hating this new Hollis is impossible.
But if he can’t be strong enough to resist this, then I’ll have to do it for the both of us.
* * *
I spend the next two weeks avoiding Hollis as much as I can. I still see him at the studio, but I avoid his glances and questioning gazes. I also make sure he can never corner me alone.
In the short time we spent together I really grew to like him, and now with not spending time with him I actually miss him. But I know staying away is for the best. I need to focus on school, he needs to focus on his music, and anything between us would be way too complicated thanks to my dad.
I’m sure it’s only a matter of time before he figures out how to get me alone, I can see his irritation growing stronger every day, but eventually he’ll realize I’m protecting the both of us.
Besides, he might think he has real feelings for me, but there’s no way. It’s too fast and with the life he’s lived the last few years … there’s no freaking way wanting a different woman in his bed every night just goes away. I’m sure once his album is complete and he can leave here, he will. He can return to his clubbing, drinking, man-whoring ways.
At least, that’s what I tell myself so I can feel better about avoiding him.
The hurt in his eyes, though? It’s real. I can’t deny it.
I walk into the studio, precariously balancing the coffee I picked up as well as the subs I brought along from the Sub Club. I don’t normally work there and then come to the studio, but my dad said they’d be working late and he wanted the extra help.
“Whoa, careful there.” Cannon who’s lounging in the front room hops up from the couch he was sprawled on to help me carry the load in.
He takes the cup holder from me and his big hands nearly dwarf it.
“Thanks.” I flash him a smile.
Cannon, covered in tattoos and the epitome of bad boy, happens to be the most levelheaded of the guys—and as they call him, the mother hen. Looking at him you’d assume he’d be the worst of the bunch, but it’s proof of how you should never judge a book by its cover. He’s a genuinely nice guy from what I’ve seen. It’s hard to get to know him when he barely ever speaks.
The two of us head to the back and he hands out the coffee while I pass around the sandwiches. I purposely hand Fox his and Hollis’s so I don’t have to risk eye contact or even the chance of our fingers brushing.
Hollis glares at me. I can feel his eyes searing into the side of my face, and I know it didn’t escape his notice as to what I did.
The air simmers between us, like some visible mighty thing, so I quickly duck out of the room with an excuse of needing a soda.
Grabbing a Mountain Dew from the refrigerator in the common area I crack it open and take a sip, trying to calm my racing heart.
Pissing off Hollis was never my intention, but it was kind of inevitable.
He can be mad all he wants—but I’m standing my ground on this.
When I feel calm enough I return to the room and take a seat to eat my sandwich. No one’s in the booth right now, instead we all eat. The guys discuss with my dad the progress of the day, things they want to tweak, and what they want to record next.
Hollis steadfastly ignores my presence now.
It’s what I wanted, but suddenly I feel chilled and it’s not from the temperature of the room.
After we eat I clean up the trash while they get back to work.
Once I have the trash disposed of my dad has me pull up a stool beside him and allows me to be a part of the recording. I love this part, bringing life to a song, breathing magic into it. I can’t help the smile permanently glued to my lips as I work beside him.
When I glance up, in the reflection of the glass I find Hollis watching me closely. His legs are crossed, his thumb and forefinger resting over his full bottom lip as if he’s deep in thought. I look away quickly, hoping he didn’t notice me looking back at him.
I hear a small chuckle and I curse myself because he totally caught me.
Hours pass and it’s nearing midnight before my dad calls it a day. My body feels heavy and tired. I have no idea how I’m going to drive the hour home. I’m tempted to see if I can crash at Kira’s but since I hadn’t planned for this I don’t have any of my stuff.
As everyone else leaves I stay behind to clean up yet again and make sure everything is in order. It doesn’t take long before I’m locking the front door behind me and heading for my car.
I don’t feel too comfortable being downtown by myself this late so I shuffle to the back lot as quickly as I can.
The headlights on my car flash, illuminating a humanoid shadow.
Before I can scream the shadow turns and Hollis stands in front of me.
I shove him. “Don’t scare me like that,” I seethe as my heart threatens to break free from my chest.
He glowers down at me. “It’s the only way I can get you to talk to me,” he spits out. He’s angry, rightfully so.
“I don’t know what you want from me,” I finally say.
He pushes his long fingers roughly through his curly hair. “Fuck, I don’t know, but I expect more than the silent treatment.”
“I’m trying to protect us,” I explain, sidestepping him but he immediately blocks my path. “Hollis,” I complain, pleading with my eyes for him to drop this and let me pass.
He pushes closer to me, spreading his arms and closing in around me so my back is pressed against the brick of the studio. He angles his head, looking at me as he thinks through what he wants to say.
I square my shoulders, refusing to be intimidated. He works his bottom lip into his mouth and dammit if it isn’t the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen.
“You don’t want anything to do with me then?” he asks softly, a challenge sparkling in his eyes.
“I … it’s too dangerous to even be friends.”
He presses one hand to the column of my neck, angling my head up.
“You mean to tell me, if I leave here right now, find a willing chick, take her back to the hotel, and fuck her until her pussy is raw you’ll be okay with it?”
I struggle to breathe at the visual he’s painted. I want to rip out the imaginary girl’s eyes with my fingers.
I know what he’s trying to do to me, and it’s working.
Damn him.
“Y-Yes,” I stutter, the words barely a whisper. “I-I’d be okay.”
Lie. Such a fucking lie.
His lips tilt into a crooked grin. He knows I’m lying and he’s gotten exactly what he wanted.
He steps away from me, shoving his hands in his pockets. “Okay. Goodbye, Mia.”
He turns, walking through the alley and disappearing onto the street.
The whole way home, all I can think about is him making good on his threat. If he does … I’ll be more than happy to punch the arrogant smile off his face for proving me right—but my gut says he won’t do it. No, he merely wanted to see how I’d react and I gave him exactly what he expected.
12
Hollis
I can’t wipe the triumphant smile off of my face as I step into the suite. None of the guys are anywhere to be seen, no doubt showering or already fallen into bed. Crossing the expansive space to my own room I close the door behind me. I take off my clothes and climb into bed. I should be exhausted after all the work we’ve done today, but I’m suddenly wide awake with sleep a forgotten illusion.
Mia’s face when I suggested I might hook up with someone else … the devastation she tried so desperately to hide … fuck. It was so raw, completely real, shaking me to my core. Never has someone given me a look even similar to it before. It only reinforced what I already knew. She feels this too, it’s not only me. Maybe it’s simply chemistry, this insane connection we have, but my gut tells me it’s more. Something like this is too rare, too powerful, for it to be such a simple explanation.
But she’s stubborn—more stubborn than I am, I have to give her credit there—refusing to give in to these emotions. I know she does it to protect herself, me as well, but I think she also knows as well as I do there’s no stopping this.
The consequences be damned, I will have her.
* * *
I wake up to light streaming in through the open curtains. I forgot to close them last night and I silently curse myself, tossing a pillow over my face. I groan into it, not wanting to get up. Hayes lets us have the weekend off and fuck if I want to sleep in.
But now that I’m awake I know I won’t be able to fall back to sleep.
After a few minutes of wallowing in self-pity, I get up and throw some athletic shorts on.
The rest of the suite is quiet as I stalk out. I find a bite to eat, trying to make as little noise as possible but I sound like a fucking bull in a china shop instead. It isn’t long until Fox pokes his head out of his door, his hair sticking up in every direction with squinted eyes.
“What the hell are you doing in here man?”
“Breakfast,” I answer gruffly.
“It’s seven—go back to bed.” He closes his door and disappears.
I wish I could, but I’ve always been the type whenever I get up, be it five in the morning or twelve in the afternoon I’m up to stay.
It doesn’t help my mind is on Mia—on the way her body felt pressed against mine last night as I cornered her. I hate I had to ambush her, but the way she’d been avoiding me I knew it was the only way to speak to her.
I finally manage to make myself some scrambled eggs—mostly burnt and rubbery, but I tried—and I sit down with a glass of orange juice, turning on the TV.
There’s nothing much on and I end up turning it off while I shovel the eggs in my mouth.
I’ve never had anyone get under my skin the way she does. I want to say I don’t like it, but fuck I do. I like feeling something real. For too long everything’s been superficial and Mia grounds me, brings me back to reality, to the way things should be.
I know it’s only a matter of time before we combust, she knows it too, and yet she keeps tiptoeing around me thinking if she avoids me enough this will all go away.
Unfortunately for her I’m not easily deterred.
I don’t know what I have to do to make her see it. To show her I’m worth taking a chance on. I want her to know her heart is safe with me, but with my past reputation I don’t know what I can possibly do to prove it to her. Except maybe working my ass off to show her she can push me away, ignore me, but I’m still waiting just around the corner for her to come to her senses.
Only her—there’s no one else.
* * *
After the so-called bear attack, we’ve been keeping our weekends relatively chill. Once the guys get up and eat we pile into Cannon’s Land Rover and go to the gym we joined only a few miles down the road, since the hotel doesn’t have one of its own. It’s cheap, but clean and serves its purpose.
I head straight for the treadmill. The guys poke fun at me for my love of running over lifting, but when I run my mind clears. I feel free in a way I rarely do otherwise. I stick my earphones in, turning up my music as loud as it can go before it reaches deafening levels. I turn the treadmill on and start at a slow jog before kicking it up to a full sprint.
It isn’t long until I’m drenched in sweat, but I can feel my mind emptying and I welcome it. The only other time I can get this level of numbness is when I drink myself into oblivion and since Hayes has us all on the tightest fucking leash imaginable drinking isn’t an option at the moment. Besides, I do stupid shit when I’m wasted and I’d feel like I was tempting fate to lead me down a dangerous path if I picked up a bottle right now. The last thing I need is to do something stupid to prove Mia right about what kind of guy I am.
You know, it pisses me off people have such a big opinion on who I am and what I stand for when they don’t even know me. Not the real me.
Yeah, I’m cocky. Yes, I can be arrogant, sarcastic, and a million other things, but I also know I’m not as bad as the media portrays.
Just because I’ve slept with a lot of women I’m a manwhore asshole? Excuse me, last time I checked all those women were ready and willing.
