Demetrius, page 7
Empty, like mine.
“Is this your… ex-wife?” He seemed to place emphasis on ex.
It stung a bit, but sometimes the truth hurt.
“Yup. No ring. And I think a new man. Though she won’t tell me until they’re probably about to walk down the aisle. We’re kind of the same in that way. We want things to be serious before they’re known by anybody else. If that makes sense?”
“...Yeah, I get it. Sorry you found out from a picture?”
His voice lifted in question, and I couldn’t help but laugh. To normal people, it didn’t look like anything. But seeing as Denise was pregnant by the time my folks found out about us, I knew without having to ask who this new man was if she was willing to post a picture with him online.
“It’s alright. Honestly, I don’t have a right to get angry. It’s not like things ended horribly between us. The opposite, really. We just grew up and drifted apart romantically. Everything was work, work, work for me. And she wanted to do more than just raise our son. Go back to school and all.”
I gritted my teeth, hoping I wasn’t turning this beautiful evening into a therapy session. “You know, a part of me almost wishes it had ended badly. Not because I’m stupid enough to think that would be better. But because it would give me an excuse for still hoping.”
“Hoping for what?” There it was again, that strange strain in his voice, like Miguel was suppressing some unspoken emotion.
Maybe what I was saying was hitting a personal note. He had to be in his late thirties or early forties. Though I’d never asked outright. Maybe he’d been divorced too and talking about all this was too much?
“Hoping we can magically fix things and be a happy family again. But I’m over it now. We’ll co-parent, and do our thing going forward. Baby steps. I haven’t dated in twelve years. I gotta give myself some grace getting back out there. Sorry if I’m being depressing. This beautiful view in front of us and I’m hung up on the past.”
“It’s not like it’s been years since you two split. I understand.”
“Have you been divorced before?” I asked.
“No, but I’ve had my heart broken. So I understand.”
The drop in his tone and shoulders clued me in that whoever broke Miguel’s heart meant a lot to him. And he was being a little too understanding. I figured I should open the floor for him to vent if that was what Miguel needed to do too.
“Was she your fiancée?” I blurted out without thinking.
He shifted uncomfortably. I had pried too much.
But before I could say I was sorry, he spoke in a whispered voice: “No she wasn’t, and I broke things off. But then he really broke my heart, and ever since then I’ve just done my own thing.”
My mouth formed a perfect O, not sure why it shocked me so much that he was…
Gay?
Bi?
He definitely said he meant a lot to me, but she before that. I clasped my fingers together. Tried not to read too much into it.
Whatever his sexuality might have been, Miguel got me. And that was all that really mattered in the end.
No need to overthink past that.
“I see. Well. There’s no point hanging on to the past. We move forward. Which reminds me… You’re a good listener. A good friend. I’m sorry we didn’t get off to a good start.”
“Thank you? And it’s okay.” Miguel’s voice lifted in question again, looking up at me, his moody hazel eyes reflecting mine.
I gulped, in a hurry to change the course and tone of our conversation.
“Sooo… you wouldn’t mind trying to hook me up, would you? At some point down the line.”
“Come again?” He seemed startled by the question, as uneasiness settled in his shifting gaze.
“Remember? You said you’d be my guide. There’s a lot to do in Gaynor. Things to do and see. I’m asking you how a single father in his late twenties meets someone around here? Preferably not at a school-sponsored function. Most of those women have husbands and boyfriends, you know?”
I tried to keep the mood light and airy and figured he’d do the same. Things were getting a little too emotional, pensive, and we came to the pier to loosen up, not get bogged down in bad emotions.
We could hit up some bars. Miguel was single, and I assumed Mike and Chris were too. I hadn’t dated in over ten years, and I had stayed faithful. Marrying your high school crush made you ill-equipped to tackle a dating scene that had gone virtual, especially when you had a kid.
But instead of offering up a nightclub, a place to pick up women—he had dated a woman at some point—or preferably someone he knew, Miguel leaned in closer. Too close, actually, so close I could feel his breath ghost against my skin.
“I’m sure it won’t be hard to find someone without my help,” he said.
“But I’m not really looking for friends with benefits. I’m looking for… something real. I don’t know, I feel like it’s easier to open your heart to someone you can trust. And I’m too new around here to know who I can trust.”
I knew I sounded old fashioned, but it was the truth. Maybe I was just built different, better suited for marriage. But I liked to know someone was home waiting for me, to deal with life with, and live a life that didn’t revolve around parenting, work, and school.
Miguel stayed quiet for a long time, pensive, but no longer sullen. Then he looked at me in a way that made my stomach twist into knots again, his gaze too hot, too piercing, and yet I couldn’t turn away.
And he was way too close.
“There’s nothing wrong with having a little fun once in a while. It’s just as real, I can promise you that.”
Did I imagine it, or did his hand slide across the wood of the bench closer to mine?
“You never know when it can become something more.”
“We should get going,” I spat out, the tension too much for me to handle.
There shouldn’t have been any tension at all. We were just two guys hanging out on a dock. Nothing more, nothing less.
And, yet…
Miguel’s eyes flicked down to my watch. “I guess so.”
I stood up before I could stop myself, lingering by the bench as he looked up at me. But this time his gaze was easy, open, friendly. Just as it had always been, since we got to know each other. And now that I didn’t see him as a nuisance, it felt reassuring for Miguel to look at me that way.
“You should come to hang out with us. I… I mean, Mike, Chris, and I are dying to get to know you. Worry about dating some other time. For now, just enjoy a little freedom, hm?”
I nodded, not really sure how to respond. Miguel was a social butterfly while the other two men were gruffer, got shit done, and kicked back after work.
I’d never built up a strong tolerance, or taste, for alcohol. Even back when I did party, which was every blue moon in between work, home life, and school. And the last thing I needed to do was some embarrassing shit like get wasted and cry over my broken marriage and ex.
“Sure. Let’s find a time that works, and I’ll make sure someone can watch my son.”
And with that, I turned stiffly towards the car, feeling his eyes on my back like fire licking at my spine.
I didn’t remember getting home. I just found myself desperately looking at the changing scenery, overly aware of Miguel, and how close we felt in such a huge truck. I got out as soon as we got to my house, but stopped short of going inside without so much as a goodbye.
“See you tomorrow,” I murmured.
“Don’t you need me to pick up Meech?” he asked.
“He can walk,” I said, eyes flicking to him and then to his mirror.
“...Alright. But we’re still good for Fright Night tomorrow, right?”
“Of course. You, me, and, ah, Meechie. See you.”
I tried to sound casual. I hoped I sounded like it wasn’t a big deal, because it wasn’t.
…Right?
As I shut the door, racing inside my house, I couldn’t help reliving that moment on the bench that shouldn’t have felt like that.
My jumbled thoughts.
How close he was.
The way the setting sun caught in his eyes.
Strange emotions started welling up inside, too quickly for me to squash.
I didn’t dare put a voice to it, but one thing kept swirling around in my mind that entire night—how acutely I wanted him to lean in just a little closer on that bench, and how much I wanted to feel that heated gaze on me again.
CHAPTER 10
MIGUEL
“What is that?” Demetrius demanded the second his front door opened.
“My costume,” I said, confused. “Where’s yours?”
Before Demetrius could explain away his usual long-sleeved shirt and jeans, Meech stepped out, also in a boring outfit. Jeans and a graphic hoodie. I nearly died.
“What? No! You’re the kid! You have to be in a costume too or I look ridiculous.”
Meech started laughing.
“You’re a police officer?” he asked. “Do you have a gun?”
“No, but I have this very painful plastic baton to whack you with if you act out of line.”
“Oh God,” Demetrius muttered, looking up. ““Please don’t keep up some sort of cop routine all night. I beg of you.”
I grinned and waited until he reached the front door of my truck before stopping him.
“Excuse me sir,” I said loudly. “It’s into the back with you.”
I made a very exaggerated effort at pushing him into the backseat for Meech’s entertainment until I got a very, very unimpressed look from my prisoner and released him.
“On second thought, you can be my partner.”
I winked and opened the front door for him.
Shaking his head, he climbed in.
“Here.”
As soon as I was in the driver’s seat, I pulled the hat off my head and placed it perfectly atop Demetrius’.
“Do you want the cuffs too?”
His lips parted, no doubt to tell me to shut up and drive when Meech chimed in.
“I’ll take them!”
I laughed, unhooked the plastic contraption from my belt, and handed it over along with one of the keys.
“I’ll keep the second key in case you lose that one,” I said. “With our luck, you’ll end up handcuffed to the Ferris wheel or something.”
In the backseat, Meech was grinning an evil grin at his new toy.
Preteen boys were truly evil. Adorable, but evil.
I couldn’t wait to see his reaction to the haunted houses. Actors in various costumes walked the park, terrorizing visitors. The haunted houses had different levels though. My favorite one was the blackout house. It was pitch black with noise effects. You had to feel around to find exits, but there were actors hiding in the dark to scare you too.
“I don’t like this,” Demetrius said, watching me. “You look too happy.”
Laughter burst from my lips.
“Excuse me?”
“You’re up to something.”
“No, I’m not,” I said innocently.
He raised a brow at me, and I caved.
“Fine! I can’t wait to see how scared you get!”
“My dad doesn’t get scared,” Meech piped up from the back.
“That’s only because he has never been to the Gaynor Beach Fright Night.”
They both started to argue, but I held firm.
“You’re going to scream,” I promised. “At least once.”
Demetrius gave me an incredulous half smile, and then his eyes narrowed in challenge.
“We’ll see,” he said. Then, with a mischievous smile I didn’t even know he was capable of, he added, “You’ll scream.”
“Me?!” I laughed. “No way. I love Halloween. None of this stuff scares me.”
“We’ll see,” he repeated ominously.
I wanted to keep the banter going, but we were pulling into the lot and the endless loop of parking-spot searching began.
Eventually, we had to leave and park on a side street nearby before walking back. Not the end of the world, but there was a massive line to enter the park by the time we got there, and then, the moment we were through the doors, Meech waved at some kids excitedly.
They waved him over at once, and me and Demetrius waited while they talked.
The sounds, the atmosphere of autumn and Halloween, were thick in the air. The smell of funnel cake and popcorn, the sounds of spooky music, and people screaming on the rides.
I was eager to show them around but had an idea what was going to happen the second Meech turned back to us with eager eyes.
“Can I go around with them?” he asked. “They’re my friends from school.”
Demetrius bit his full lower lip, gaze shooting unexpectedly to me for support.
I nodded and he looked at the kids. There were four of them and a parent as well, who waved and smiled, and Demetrius turned to his son, clearly pretending that he wasn’t freaking out over sending him around the park alone with people he didn’t know. He approached the mother, chatting to her for a minute, and I couldn’t help remembering what he’d said at the pier about wanting to date like-minded women. Considering that this woman was probably married, I really shouldn’t have been feeling strangely threatened. After all, how much more clear could Demetrius have made it? I wasn’t what he wanted. And yet, it still felt like sometimes he was looking at me like I was what he wanted.
“Do you have your phone?” Demetrius asked Meech, who nodded, bouncing with excitement.
“Call me in an hour, okay? If you don’t, I’m sending a search party out.”
Meech nodded, already bounding away with his friends.
“Okay, Dad! Bye!”
Demetrius watched him go, looking stunned.
“He couldn’t get away fast enough,” he sighed miserably.
“It’s a good thing,” I reminded him, drawing his gaze. “He’s making friends. Friends are what make you feel like you belong...”
I drifted off at the look Demetrius was giving me, suddenly seeing the parallels of what I had said. I had kind of forced this friendship to form. But that wasn’t a bad thing, was it?
“You’re so nice,” he suddenly said.
I blinked.
“You are. You’re nice. Kind. A good person…”
A flutter of warmth spread through me, my cheeks heating.
I didn’t know what to say or how to respond to that. I wanted to argue though. I wanted to tell him that I’d only gone out of my way to befriend him because it would make work more enjoyable, but that didn’t explain the rides, the shared meals, the trips to the festivals with his son on the weekends.
I liked being around him though, so even that felt a little bit selfish.
Shrugging, I knocked his shoulder.
“Don’t get too emotional now just because your son is moving off on his own. There’s still a few more years before college.”
He rolled his eyes and bumped me in return.
“So, what now?” he asked.
“Now…,” I said, a slow smile forming on my lips, “I scare you.”
“You’re on.”
His confidence turned out to be well deserved. Demetrius was like a rock. When one of the girls dressed like a zombie ghost from a horror film who had scared Dan’s wife Lea nearly to tears last year walked right up to his face and stared into his eyes, he hadn’t even blinked.
The first haunted house was standard, more for kids, with fake-looking displays of body parts and triggers that made things light up or move slightly.
“Okay,” I admitted, “that one was weak, but we haven’t gone on the wheelbarrow ride yet. Just wait.”
“Is that the scariest one?” he asked.
“Well, no. That would be the blackout house—”
“I knew it! You think you’ll get me that easily? Let’s skip ahead,” he challenged.
“You think you can handle it?” I goaded.
“Oh, I can handle it,” he said, coming right up into my face, a little too close, the cop hat still perched atop his head brushing my hair.
“Alright,” I conceded, my heart suddenly racing.
Grinning, he turned, looking for the signs for the next haunted house.
The blackout house was held in a big tent, erected next to the festival games. While we stood in line, Demetrius started to point out all the kids playing games nearby, asking me where I thought Meech was.
Somehow, I was able to answer all his questions even while I was aware of the way I felt drawn to stand closer to him, to smell his cologne, maybe even close enough to brush the fabric of his shirt.
Something was happening.
I couldn’t be entirely sure, but it was hard to completely disregard the increased frequency of lingering looks from those intense, dark eyes. Or the way he turned to me more now, always brushing me when he didn’t need to. Touching my arm, nudging me.
My head was screaming at me that Demetrius was straight. All this time I had been sure, but now, one step too close, and I was doubting everything I had been sure of when it came to the other man.
He was so young to have a kid Meech’s age. He’d been with Meech’s mom since they were teenagers. Who knew themselves fully as a teenager? I sure as hell hadn’t. Maybe now that he was single for the first time in over ten years, he was seeing things a little differently.
Maybe I was making him see things differently.
“What are you thinking about?” Demetrius suddenly asked, pulling me from my thoughts.
I swallowed, realizing that I had gone silent for too long. That a frown was plastered across my face.
Shaking myself, I took a moment to think of what to say.
“Just wondering how best to scare you in there.”
A grin lifted his lips and the way he smiled at me, so playful and open, made butterflies erupt inside me. What I wouldn’t give to kiss that smile.
“You’re going to be the one screaming,” he said. “Remember?”
It was official; he was far more adorable than he had any right to be. Who knew that buried just beneath that cold wall was such a cute personality?
